WTF!: Giant Alien Skull Unearthed In Peru

November 18, 2011


If eyes really are the windows to the soul YOU'VE GOT TWO GIANT GAPING HOLES IN THE SIDE OF YOUR HOUSE BRO.

These are the mummified remains of an alien found in Peru. Sure you might think they're just the remains of a person born with a really unfortunate dome, but no, they're from an alien. Spanish and Russian doctors agree, yo. You can't argue with that level of international consensus!

Website RPP is claiming that Renato Davila Riquelme, an anthropologist working at the Privado Ritos Andinos museum in Cusco, has discovered remains of something that isn't human. Measuring at 20 inches tall, the tiny remains were originally believed to be that of a child, but Spanish and Russian doctors disagree, saying:

"It has a non-human appearance because the head is triangular and big, almost the same size as the body. At first we believed it to be a child's body until Spanish and Russian doctors came and confirmed that, yes, it's an extraterrestrial being.

Now I'm not saying these "doctors" should probably lose their licenses for sucking at their jobs, but do you really want surgery performed by somebody who can't tell an asshole from an elbow? "Well, GW, the good news is we were able to successfully remove the tumor from your leg." And the bad news?! "We took your penis first by accident." WHAT?! "Aaaaaaaaand sewed your butthole closed." But I'll explode!

Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures of the not-so-crystal skull.





Triangle-Headed Alien Mummy discovered in Peru -- we're not alone! [io9]
Mysterious, triangle-shaped 'alien skull' found in Peru [yahoonews]

Thanks to Melissa, who's found more convincing alien skulls in the dumpster behind the butcher's department at the grocery store.

Previous Post
Next Post