Dec 7 2010Tom Sawyer, Zombie Destroyer: Riverboat Designed To Survive Zombie Apocalypse

FINALLY something to do with zombies.... (got it right this time)

:)

...these could also be useful after the polar ice caps melt & we're all living in kevin costners waterworld

naas- except for the fact that these run on environmentally friendly "zombie diesel"

and the shocking thing is... that would work. the diesel process.

@3 yesss, we're set for either scenerio..... OR some zombie slaves can be held on board for 'extraction' until someone installs solar panels

first.

I won't be surprised if Zombie Diesel becomes a common element in future designs. It's a game changer.

Does ths zombie diesel pump water from the not so strategically placed potable water tank?

I fail to understand how you would get each section on the boat?
Greenhouses clearly need to be at the top to get light, but so do the solar panels, and again the guns and control tower need to be on top.

I'm pretty sure you'd need a fúcking aircraft carrier to fit all of that shít on 1 level.

There is a flaw. What happens if one zombie infects one passenger? The whole ship is fucked, there is no escape. The ship becomes a floating virus. You're better off mating with zombies and try to coexist with them.

@9 obviously you have to be careful with the undead. Mating with them in the past has only given us this

http://i.pbase.com/o3/84/95484/1/104656899.jHI9gGQH.donation3.jpg

.....nobody wants to live with that

@8 I saw it as the part with the crane being the boat, and the rest are towed behind in an awkwardly long convoy of platforms. And I guess you'd just leap between them? Purposefully bringing zombies on board for processing is just asking for trouble. Just make the whole thing solar, it's not like you have to move fast.

Two problems: 1. Not enough guns. There should be way more gun mounts and probably some harpoon guns to spear zombies on the river bank and reel them in for fuel. 2. Who puts the cooking quarters and the firearm storage in the same place. A grease fire breaks out and you and your guns are up in flames. A recipe for disaster.

@7

Thank you, I thought I was the only one that noticed that.... Stupid to not have gravity do the work.

Won´t work.

Ever.

If movies and games have teached us one thing it´s that every single time you try to "use" zombies for anything (as workers, soldiers, bait...whatever) you´ll end screwed. Some moron always leave the door open or manages to get himself bitten (and, of course, won´t tell anybody until is too late)

Better use sails or rows instead. The farther you stay from zombies, the better.

@12

You must suck as a cook. Nice way to fit in 'recipe for disaster' though.

@11 Thanks, I considered it, but had no idea how the hell people would get to each platform lol.

@12 there are always people in the kitchen. walk into a random house, someone is in the kitchen. its a rule of life. I thought that that was a surprisingly well thought out move, putting the firearm storage there. also, what better place to make a stand then the kitchen? knives, food, water, and guns. perfect.

DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS

As somebody that has made a career of working on the river... Typically, barges are 200' by 35', and on average a barge only sits between 1' to 2' in the water when not loaded. On the Mississippi, Push Boats normally PUSH up to 30 at a time. 5 wide and six long with the boat at the back and the barges out in front. The barges are wired together so essentially they become one solid structure. So once the boat and the barges are wired together you can walk from one to another with ease. http://travel.webshots.com/photo/1118103043034885681oJdIKl Smaller tow than on the Mississippi but you'll get the idea

Also, it doesnt look particular weather proof. those cabins? ripped to shreds in a cyclone. any flying debris would demolish the greenhouse... etc ,etc.

@11 wouldn't you kill the zombies first and then put them in the zombie sludge bit?

Also, I would put some form of plank or bridge between the barges/boats that would be able to rotate if you turned. Although with such a long convoy, you'd need to have a large turning circle to avoid damage to anything.

lot of good posts today

win

@jaja the design is a sort of barge tug boat where the "gunship" pulls the other sections. it would actually be kind of simple to find the materials for this since they're all over major distribution rivers.

Why zombies don't eat each other???

The problem EVERYONE has with a potential zombie apocalypse is that they don't understand the danger. You would likely be killed and your fancy ship stolen by looting people (who would just as soon burn everything you have built) and who want to steal your shit long before you ever even SAW a zombie.

The greens section shall come handy for vegetables & Marijuana alike.

@19 Thank you for your wisdom, mystery boatman xD

It's simple....everyone just study a map, find a small island by itself in the middle of the ocean (go scouting on your next "vacation"), and save up for a boat....make sure you have enough fuel for that trip plus some extra fuel hidden on the island beforehand. When the zombie apocalypse happens, get your happy ass on the boat and hightail it to your island. Unless zombies can operate boats or ride sharks, I don't see them making it to you. Think Swiss Family Robinson, except way more prepared and hiding from zombies. You can find an island where you can grow your own crops/pot, build actual structures, fish and cook and be naked if you want, and not have to worry about how many bullets you have and if that dude that wandered in is infected.....the infected would die before they got to your secret island.

At #29...

Yeah, you and 10 thousand other people will be heading to that island. Good luck.

Is it just me that thinks this make a really good FPS multiplayer map?

Sweet. A safe place for me to go and only 5 mins away from the river in downtown Memphis.

Naaaa, I'd rather be a zombie.

So wait... you have your crappy smelling compost heap upwind of all your veggies? "Why does this salad taste like rotting crap?"

The you have a diesel processing plant right next to your fuel storage tanks which is also within a couple feet of your amunition cache - which appears to be stored in metal shipping boxes? "Yeah. that makes perfect sense... what could possibly go wro...

BOOM!

So this is like "Water World" with zombies. Instead of water covering landscape, it's zombies.

I appreciate the design but i do find a fatal flaw. A need for double and even triple redundancy is crucial. All crafts should be able to go on there own. Your ammo storage is three barges back from your primary weapon systems, what up with that?

@8 Nifty thing, Grow lights, you can put them anywhere. @random number about oceans and islands. Also this boat wasnt designed to go into the ocean just down the missip. as it clearly says, The zombie apoc. is ALL about survival, not living in comfort and drinkin ur margaritas. You do what u have to to survive if that means ur shitting next to ur green house then u shit next to that green house. No one said it would be "Fun" or comfortable just managable besides you really wouldnt have to travel all the way down the River that boat seemed like it could hold at least what 20-40 ppl? all with guns park that bitch not seein how a zombie is going to climb up ur boat when its in the water anyway so grow shit off the boat and use it as a strong hold, Go hunting kill some crocs down south what have u. its got everything u need cranes will do all ur heavy lifting, i wouldnt bother with the zombie sludge personally, workin with the virus is always a bad idea solar plates and store the power below deck to have spot lights and stuff at night. maybe if u have this big ass boat why dont u have simple Security cams with night vision

@35 Valid point right there

Thats it Im Making my own photo. You will see it soon

Can we surplant the word Zombie in 'Zombie Diesel' for 'Elderly', or 'Prisoners'?
I think we could solve the energy crisis. Soilentcrude.