Oct 9 2009That's No Playground, That's A Dieground!


Apparently Giganta was a piece of robotic playground equipment available in the late 70's for really sadistic playground designers. I'm just thankful the Baptist preschool I went to didn't have one or I may have not made it past five. Seriously, who the hell would want to play inside the cage-like belly of a two-ton robot? You've got to hand it to the manufacturer though -- I love how they awarded themselves a fake prize for the product to make it look better. "Miracle Medalist", that's great. What's the real miracle is that Giganta here didn't send kids running into oncoming traffic.

Playgrounds From the 70s [make]

Thanks to BiSScuiTT, who grew up playing with bears in the woods like a normal kid.

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Reader Comments

The robot playground is a lie.

Dude's I had this a a kid and loved it. I especially loved crawling through the hole in his neck to get beat up by sadistic 6th grades or sliding down the sun heated 130 degree metal "arms"

ah good times, good times

lol this is so intense, i would have had nightmares!!!

Reminds me of the sacrificial "Wicker Man" movie.

I had this in my town when i was a kid! It was fun at first but then all the kids started peeing in it and after that it smelled horrible. :(

Robot Frankenstein has some seriously saggy boobs

This looks like those cages in "Terminator: Salvation" that the robots use to round up their human slaves.

@1 just like your identity

I only WISH I could have had this as a kid. Instead I got splinters from shoddy wooden playgrounds and ate fists full of rubber chips for being a sissy boy.

What's with the kid laying face down on giganta's foot? Or did it just find the escape route from the pedo-cage?

this reminds me of the last time i burnt my ass cheeks.
also, the kid in the camo shirt at the bottom of the slide looks like he's just bitchslapping all the other kids when they get to the bottom.

Kind of like a post-apocalyptic version of the Celtic burning man ;-)

awww... How sweet, There's a homeless girl making a bed on
the robots feet.

She's not homeless, she's lying dead at the feet of her murderer...

@11 every slide has one of those kids at the end, remember the guy next to john cleese as robin hood in time bandits? 'thaaaank you, very veery, veeeeeeeeery much!' *PUNCH

Looks to me like the only thing this monstrosity is "automatically producing" are human-shaped cyborgs. It concocts what it thinks humanity would find appealing and as least threatening as possible in its upper core logistical center. Then, once finished refining the general layouts, drops them down to it's refining chamber where they receive all the finishing touches to completely fool us. After which, they are ejected through the robot's twin, forward cyborg dispersal units.

It must take the little creatures a bit to get their bearing based on how lost and clueless some of them appear as they hang around their maker for a while before silently assimilating into our society.

Clever bastards! Just remember this on October 31st when they oh-so-innocently start knocking on our doors...the "trick" is that they aren't real human children, the "treat" is them knocking you unconscious while you bend over to put candy in their little sacks (that they stole after kidnapping real children btw - candy AND better disguises all in one fell swoop...crafty, I'm tellin you) then dragging your body back to their cpu plants to hook you up and slowly drain your life force to power their army.

Just sayin'.


This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max was chasing a fugative in NY, and found out his girlfriend was seeing some wacky police shrink, that allowed anyone who wanted to touch her boobs. Max got her to make him a spaghetti dinner and when she was busy cooking he looked at her files took what he wanted and took off.

anyone see the wicker man?


Wow! My boyfriends band Marty McParty and His Filthy Reds went to a park in Texas that had that! They took pics. This was from when they were in high school. This is a geocities site so it will be deleted soon and also, if too many people look at pics I think it can get overloaded for the day.. good 'ol geocities!

aww, memories - This was at a local park when I was growing up <3

How you get into this thing?

I remember my Mcdonalds next too me growing up had something simialar but it was of mcburgler. You clilmbed into his head and chilled there, but now all grown up I realize it was a prison for us kids so our parents could relax.

Oh MY god... I grew up with this thing.
Outside of Fort Worth, Texas. Ditto on the head smelling like pee - although teenagers would still have sex up there. It was perfect for smoking up, too - police couldn't get you up there.

You got in through a little hole in his nether regions.

It's still in Texas. We used to call it Robot park, but they built a castle in front of it, so now it's Castle Park. A robot and a castle, what more could you want???

I wouldn't mind a fire breathing dragon with that castle

Christy - that's it. That's the same robot that was two minutes down the street from my house. Wow, small world.

I used to play on this when I was little. I'm pretty sure we called it the "monster" and not a robot. We must have known back then that it was evil. Even so, we really loved to play on it. It has since been destroyed.

Hahaha...I can't believe how many people think this thing is fake. We had one of these at the park I played at back in the 70's. #5 is completely right though; I don't know what's up with kids but the head always smelled like pee.

'Miracle' actually produces playground equipment: http://www.miracle-recreation.com/ There is a park in my neighborhood that has a playset for toddlers which is awesome.

@6 *nods head in agreement*

little girl: oh wee! this is so much fun!... wait... whats happening... I can't get out... IT WON"T LET ME OUT, PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME... NO! WAIT DON'T COME IN HERE, NOOOO! little boy: relax someones gonna find us. little girl: no I'm afraid no ones ever find us were trapped in here forever!... wait a sec is it me or is the room getting smaller... ew what are these juices... OH MY GOD I think it's digesting us for power! little boy: what are you talking about? little girl: I'm talking about this robot is going to digest us, I know it sounds immposible but I read this article on geekologie about a robot that can li... run on dead flesh. little boy: but were alive. little girl: I know. little boy: OH SH!T OH SH!T.... TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO SEE IF THE CHILDREN LIVE... OR DIE!

Must See!!!


Lol. I loved playgrounds that looked basically like prisons. Kids now get rubber mats on theirs. We had gravel. I'm pretty sure the next generation will just be born without spines.

naas - this really is me =) I got tired of $.02. BTW - thanks for the note on FB. That was really sweet.

Holy Crap! i havent seen one of these in years..... We had one where i grew up NW side of Chicago, mighta been Niles accually... But yes, the head always smelled like pee, and only play on it in the morning or evening as the sun baked the shit out of it during the summer.

omg I totally know a playground around here with a giant metal robot. That was the shit when I was a kid!

@ 35

Was it because everyone (present company excluded) thought you were a guy? BTW: How’s the fiancé?

We had one of these at santa clarita park, and its still there but you can't climb on it anymore. it used to seem so big to us. we always burned our asses on the slide when it was hot. but i remember some of my friends kissing boys in it.

This is what the kids want nowadays...

Dino-tastic !

What i love most about that add is that it says, it's stands head and shoulders above most other playground equipment. It's like it's saying well it's good, but it's not great.

I had this in the area when I was growing up and it was so much fun! We called it Trashcan man park! And it wasn't creepy...unlike what some of you think it totally inspired the imagination of kids and was a fun place to explore in saftey.

Sadly, I tried to go back there a few years ago with a much younger brother to share the experience but it was torn down. =(

It must take the little creatures a bit to get their bearing based on how lost and clueless some of them appear as they hang around their maker for a while before silently assimilating into our society.

Yeah, we had this at a park in Jacksonville.

It was awesome! (if you don't count the third degree burns from the sun heated metal)

It wasn't creepy at all...at least until the head came off. There was an abandoned headless robot standing in the park for years.

Oh the memories..

They have one of these at Santa's Village in Jefferson, NH.

I can't seem to find a picture though

>> 22. there is a hole in the bottom (goatse style)

we had one in the park where i grew up :)
the arms do get super hot but climbing the little ladders was fuun

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