Wait, What?: High Heels For Babies
Heelarious High Heels are your baby girl's first precious step to a life of stripping. Made for infants 0-6 months old, the $35 shoes practically guarantee a future in exotic entertainment. Okay, so they're actually just crib shoes that have a foam heel, but still, I think we can all agree this is fundamentally wrong. Thankfully, I'll never have a daughter -- I always insist my girlfriend be on top.
FUTURE UPDATE: Wow, three girls in a row. Seriously, this woman on top thing just isn't freaking working. So, to you parents of boys out there -- how did you do it? Is the secret in the butt? Just wink one brown eye if it is. I knew it!
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Thanks to Melanie, who grew up wearing rocket boots and is now an astronaut.
Read More: babies, boy, children, come on now, cute, geez, girls, good or bad?, i don't know, kids, okay, scarred, shoes, stripper, sure why not, wrong
