Nov 19 2009 FroliCat BOLT: A Laser Lightshow For Cats
Yay, two laser posts in a row! The $17 FroliCat BOLT is an award winning laser lightshow for cats with owners who are too lazy to wave a laser pointer around or have lost the use of their limbs.
Simply turn it on and projects a red dot and moves it in random patterns for 15 minutes, or until your cat (or dog, or baby) realizes what's going on and attacks the gadget itself.
You know why cats love lasers so much? Because they're from the future. Plus it has something to do with their nightvision. No, really, I'm not just making this up. I took a correspondence college course in beertasting science. I wore a lab coat and everything.
Video of the POS in action after the jump.
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Nov 13 2009 VIDEO Of Bugatti Veyron Crash Into Marsh. Oh, And I Called It -- No Low-Flying Pelican
Apparently some kids happened to videotape the $1.6 million Bugatti Veyron crash from the other day. And, surprise surprise, there was no "low-flying pelican". Nope, just a man playing with himself in one of the world's most expensive production vehicles. Way to go, champ.
Hit the jump for a video of the car getting towed out.
Nov 12 2009 I Wasn't Looking For That: Mystery Google Gives You Previous Person's Search Query
Type a search query into Mystery Google and you get the results of the last person's search. For example, I searched for a serious medical condition I have, and got the results for "u'v got a face only ur momma could love". Neat? Yes. Helpful? Absolutely not. But don't let that stop you from blowing a few minutes screwing around with it. Remember: every minute wasted is a minute spent kicking the man in the junk. Go on -- kick him. Now do it again. HARDER! Okay now do me.
Thanks to Emortal, Blastphemer and Shadow Sushi, who don't search the interweb, the interweb searches them. So are we we talking like full body or what?
Nov 10 2009 I'd Demand A Discount: Shoryuken Fail
This is a picture of some poor bastard's Street Fighter tattoo that's supposed to depict the directions for performing Ryu's Shoryuken (Rising Dragon Fist). Only thing is, the correct directions are →↓↘ + P, and not ↓→↘ + P. So yeah, that's a whole lot of black ink gone wrong. Although you've got to admit, even if it were correct, that tattoo would still suck compared to my 'Charge ↓ 2 sec, ↑ + K'. I also have some tribal shit on my arms BECAUSE I AM PART OF A TRIBE. Called Quest. Can I kick it? Yes I can!
Whoops [kotaku]
Thanks to Jimmy, who has the characters for General Tso's and Moo Goo Gai Pan on his upper back.
Nov 9 2009 Orgy: The Awesomest Game Ever Made?
I've never played Orgy (larger ad shot HERE) before but I would given the opportunity and the right group of guys.
Here's the exciting new indoor sport for people who love people. Orgy begins by choosing up sides (delightful custom) and centers around the "Porron" (translation: "to pour it on") filled with your favorite libation. Object of the game is to see which team achieves the longest trajectory for the longest time with the fewest spills. Rewards to winners are optional.
This game used to sell for $10 back in the 70's and was ordered by really skeezy people like your parents. You know they used to go to key parties!
WTF! Orgy : The 1970s Board Game [iambored]
Thanks to Jennifer, who only swings on swingsets and not married couples or so she says.
Nov 3 2009 Plane Passenger Accidentally Ejects Himself
I know what you're thinking, "big deal, I eject myself all the time", but you're thinking of something different. You see, this guy accidentally ejected himself from a plane mid-flight. WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
The South African air force has confirmed the incident that took place last Wednesday, when the passenger took off for a flight with an experienced pilot from South Africa's Silver Falcons air display team. Investigators are assuming that the passenger tried to steady himself while the pilot was putting the Pilatus PC-7 Mk II through its paces by grabbing the eject lever.
A retired SAAF instructor pilot said the passenger was extremely lucky to have survived the ejection with barely a scratch.He discounted the possibility that the seat fired of its own accord, as too many safety features were built into the system.
"All it takes is for the firing handle [the rubbery black- and yellow-striped loop] to be pulled up about 2,5cm and you're on your way out."
Haha, that's awesome. I wonder what was going through the poor bastard's head. I imagine something like, "HOOOOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!". Also, I would have done the same thing. How many people can say they've ejected from a plane before? And, more importantly, does it warrant a free drink at the bar? It does? Sweeeeeet. Because then I pulled the lever and was all like PSSSSSHOOOOOOW!! Bourbon please.
Man accidentally ejects himself from plane [mail&guardian]
Thanks to Russell, who once ejected himself from a Big Wheels trying to jump a recycling bin. And to Equalizer, who once ejected himself from bed and ran like hell after sleeping with a Wookie.
Nov 1 2009 Sure, Why Not?: Driving Around In A Half-Car
Ever wanted to see some crazy Serbian driving around in car that's been cut in half? Then today's your lucky day! I kept waiting for him to flip the thing over on himself but the physics weren't there. And speaking of crazy Serbians: I used to know one. He drove a bright yellow VW GTI with a matching smiley face air freshener hanging from the rearview and an AK-47 in the trunk. I never rode with him.
Thanks to alex, who claims he could do the same thing with a 1/4 car.
Oct 31 2009 HAPPY HALLOWEEN, Have Fun Everyone!
HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! This is me in my get-up last year just before losing the costume contest and sai-ing all the judges in the face. Everybody have fun out there tonight and remember to be safe (but not too safe). Also, if you see a David after the Dentist stumbling around, that's me (I scored a nitrous tank!). HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
Oct 30 2009 NASA's Ares Rocket Breaking Sound Barrier
This is a beautiful shot (super high-res version HERE) of NASA's Ares rocket taken earlier this week just as it broke the sound barrier. Pretty awesome, huh? Just imagine if you were sitting on top. WHEEEEE!!
What you're looking at is called a "shock egg," or the Prandtl-Glauert singularity, or a shockwave that compresses air and forces the vapor out of it. You see this kind of stuff a lot in photographs trailing behind fighter jets, but it's especially awesome when it happens to rockets. According to NASA, the shot was taken by one Scott Andrews, who used a Canon of some sort.
Hell yes, shock egg. Now tell me -- which do you think came first: the supersonic chicken or the shock egg? Trick question! Dinosaurs.
Oct 28 2009 Road Rash: Crazy Four-Wheeled Motorcycle
The 2010 Cosmos 4RW V8 Muscle Bike sports four 17-inch wheels, a 250 cubic inch V8 producing 350 horsepower and an extra helping of deathtrap. Want one? Expect to spend $93K. Unless you're Batman, in which case it comes standard in the front end of a Tumbler. Unless he's been drinking, in which case it may come smashed in the grill of an 18-wheeler.
Is a motorcycle still a motorcycle if it has four wheels? [dvice]
Thanks to Chris, who drives a four-wheeled moped which I think we can safely assume has never felt a woman on its Italian pleather seat.
Oct 26 2009 That's It, I'm Moving To Dinosaur, Colorado
Unbeknownst to me there's an actual town in Colorado named Dinosaur, making it one of the coolest places in the continental United States -- right up there with Anti-robot, West Virginia! Plus, all the road names are dinosaur themed. Now I can't decide if I want to live on Triceratops Terrace or Brontosaurus Boulevard! What's a boy to do? Make love to city hall? Get out of my brain!
Thanks to Sir Roman the Galiant, pants and Kristin, who live in Aliens, Nebraska, Zombie, Arkansas and Vampire, Illinois, respectively.
Oct 22 2009 I'm A Ninja, I Can Do That: Crazy Trampolining
This is a video of Oli Lemieux doing some wild ass trampolining plus wall walking and other ninja-y stuff while practicing for a Cirque du Soleil show. It's pretty cool but I could do it all twice as good but I would never film it because I'm modest. Also, the most handsome man on the planet.
Thanks to The Gurr, MoD, Asbo and Jennie, who once jumped so high on a trampoline they showed up on radar and the government shot missiles at them.
Oct 21 2009 Anvil Launching: The World's Manliest Sport
Anvil launching is probably the world's manliest sport in front of great white hunting with a soggy pencil. I just happen to excel at both. And this is Gay Wilkinson, the self proclaimed anvil launching world champion about to send one skyward. Hit the jump for a video of the anvil in action (skip to 1:20 for the actual launch), then get out there and shoot your own dangerously heavy objects in the air. Just remember: what goes up is probably going to come down on a bystander. Happy launching!
Hit it for the video.
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Oct 21 2009 NASA Testing First New Rocket In 30 Years
NASA, an organization that has actually convinced itself they put men on the moon despite it being all staged in Hollywood, is now testing a new rocket. The phallic booster is the first new design to come out of agency since 1981. Which, incidentally, is the year I was born. What does all this mean? I'm 28!
The rocket is Ares I-X -- a suborbital prototype for the Ares I rocket NASA plans to use to launch its shuttle successor, the Orion spacecraft. Currently the world's tallest booster, the Ares I-X rolled out to the launch pad early Tuesday and is slated to blast off Oct. 27 at 8 a.m. EDT (1200 GMT) on a short demonstration flight.
"The Ares I-X is going to fly straight up and straight out," said NASA commentator George Diller as the 327-foot (100-meter) tall rocket began moving toward Launch Pad 39B at the Kennedy Space Center in Florida. "During that time we'll be testing the stage separation to determine how well the first stage separation motors perform, as well as the performance of the booster itself, namely the parachutes and other apparatus that will deploy."The $445 million rocket's rollout comes on the eve of a final report from an independent committee appointed by the White House to review NASA's plans for future human spaceflight.
You want me to tell you about the future of human spaceflight? Cause it goes like this: The Geekologie Writer builds a rocketship in the shed behind his house and blasts himself into the sun. Everyone is so sad rockets are banned for ever. Then everybody dies because you couldn't colonize Mars. The end.
NASA Unveils Ares 1-X Rocket for Historic Test Flight [foxnews]
Thanks to joseph, who tied his little brother to a bunch of fireworks and was just about to light the fuse when his mom caught him and yelled at him for having matches.
Oct 19 2009 BOOM!: Massive Underwater Mine Detonation
This is an old-ass video of somebody's (the French's?) Navy detonating an underwater mine. The picture quality is pretty poor but the explosion is amazing and I'm not afraid to admit I got aroused. Twice. Plus I love how at the very end they realize their boat's gonna be capsized by the resulting wave and start going apeshit. Talk about poor planning -- that's something I would do! But it's cool because I'm a blogger and not a Navy.
Thanks to Trogdolorian, who plans on traveling back in time to seize and burninate a castle.
Oct 16 2009 Map Shows All Flights Over North America
This is a screenshot from the National Air Traffic Controllers Association (an organization that knows how to party) real-time map of flights over North America. Except it's not actually real-time, it's delayed 5 minutes. Of course, judging from the 2005 copyright in the lower left this may have existed for awhile. But what it lacks in newness I think we can all agree is more than made up for in, uh, little white dots. Don't let Pac-Man see it!
Flight Explorer [natca]
Thanks to e, who's contemplating flying south for the winter. Smart -- I don't jive with the cold either.
Oct 15 2009 Abe, Nooo!: Gallery Of Geek-ily Defaced Bills
Because it's illegal and I don't do anything illegal, I've never defaced currency or put pennies on a train track. Nor have I looked at another man's junk while standing at a urinal. Or have I? I totally have -- I do it often!
Peekaboo.
Hit the jump for 15 more presidents dressed as different characters. There are laughs to be had!
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Oct 14 2009 Build Your Own Roller Coaster Ride At Disney
No this isn't Roller Coaster Tycoon, this is real life! The "Sum of all Thrills" is a new ride at Disney's Epcot Center that allows children to design their own roller coasters and then ride them in a virtual reality environment with the aid of a giant robotic arm. I smell vomit! No, seriously -- I think a cat puked under the bed.
Epcot on Wednesday opened a new attraction called "Sum of All Thrills," which lets kids use computer tablets to design a virtual roller coaster, bobsled track or plane ride. After inputting their designs, kids climb into a robotic carriage that uses virtual-reality technology to help them experience the ride they've created.
"This is really the next generation -- where there's a lot more personalization involved" in the amusement-park experience, said Eric Goodman, Disney's lead project manager on the ride.
Cool. Of course, I question how much customization you'll actually get to do (I want 30 loopty-loops in a row!), or how much you should actually trust a child with anyway (100% of 0). Just saying, I have the feeling a lot of coasters are gonna end with a giant robotic arm slamming you into the ground repeatedly. YOU KIDS WILL NEVER BE IMAGINEERS!
Hit the jump for a better shot of the last thing you'll ever climb inside.
Continue Reading " Build Your Own Roller Coaster Ride At Disney "
Oct 13 2009 Power Wheels Modded Into Halo Warthog
I was never allowed to have a Power Wheels growing up because my parents were too afraid I'd back over my own head, but that's neither here not there, it's just one of the reasons I have parent issues. Anyway, some lucky tyke's father went and modded his to look like a Warthog from Halo. Sweet!
Fortunately, thanks to the folks at Bungie, we're all that much more knowledgeable about the DIY Power Wheels modder set. All it took was one M12 Light Reconnaissance Vehicle--better known as the Warthog--fashioned from the guts of a Power Wheels miniature truck--a "very used 2001 G3740 Street Scene Silverado," according to its creator.
That creator, flux83, has done a capable job of turning that Silverado into a teeny-tiny Warthog that looks to seat a maximum of two wee Spartans.
OMG how different my life would've been if only I'd had a Warthog Power Wheels growing up! I probably would have been popular in school and maybe even had a girlfriend. And you know what having a girlfriend means! Nagging, LOTS of nagging. Oooooh, swift burn to the ladies!
Hit the jump to see a video of the awesomeness in action and a link to the build page.
Oct 9 2009 Yeah, But Can It Fly?: Amphibious WaterCar Does 60MPH On Both Land And Sea
The $200,000 WaterCar is the lovechild of a Corvette that fell in love with a cigarette boat. But, like having sex with a mermaid, everyone will tell you it was just a manatee.
Get a Corvette engine, rig it up with a Dominator Jet drive, and then strap it into a floating car, and you get the WaterCar Python, the fastest and highest-performing amphibious vehicle in the world. If zipping over the water at a top speed of 60mph doesn't float your boat, it'll accelerate on land at a neck-snapping 0-to-60 speed of a mere 4.5 seconds.
Call me old fashioned, but I like all my vehicles single-purpose. If it drives on the road, I don't want it in the ocean or sky. I mean, that's just more stuff to go wrong. And wrong, my friends, is the opposite of right. And two Wrights made an airplane. ZING! Thanks for that one, dad.
Hit the jump for several more shots and a video of the thing in action (worthwhile stuff starts at 0:50).
Continue Reading " Yeah, But Can It Fly?: Amphibious WaterCar Does 60MPH On Both Land And Sea "
