Nov 16 2009 Gnarly: Two Kite Surfers Jump British Pier
Two extreme sporters used particularly gusty winds today to fulfill their live's dreams: to jump Worthing Pier in West Sussex, England, on kite-boards. It's time to dream bigger, brahs!
Jake Scrace, 25, and Lewis Crathern, 24, had been planning Monday morning's jump for three years but had to wait for perfect weather conditions.
They took off from Goring to the west side of Worthing in gusts of wind that were more than 40mph, and had two helpers on the beach. The pair said the jump was quite hazardous and should not be attempted by amateurs.Mr Crathern said the jump was "epic".
"It was everything I've lived for - amazing," he said.
Everything you've lived for, nice. And here I've been living to destroy my body with booze and die young. But, you know, jumping over a pier with a kite, that's something too. *snicker* Pussies.
Two kite surfers jump over pier [bbcnews]
Thanks to And and 2MechanicalArms, one of which may or may not be a robot.
Nov 13 2009 NASA: 'Significant' Water Found On The Moon. Yeah, But What About Dragons?!
Remember how NASA tried to blow up the moon to get at its molten cheese core? Well apparently they discovered a 'significant' amount of water in the process. Adult swim!
The discovery was announced by project scientist Anthony Colaprete at a midday news conference. "Indeed, yes, we found water," he said.
The find is based on preliminary data collected when the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing Satellite, or LCROSS, intentionally crashed October 9 into the permanently shadowed region of Cabeus crater near the moon's south pole.After the satellite struck, a rocket flew through the debris cloud, measuring the amount of water and providing a host of other data, Colaprete said.
"The discovery opens a new chapter in our understanding of the moon," the space agency said in a written statement shortly after the briefing began.
Hell yes a new chapter in understanding the moon!
CHAPTER 6: Water On The Moon
There is water on the moon. Specifically, frozen water.
THE END
NASA finds 'significant' water on moon [cnn]
and
Picture [juliefainart]
Thanks to AZ-TRO-NOT, joey, STephen and Lizze, who found Kool-Aid on the moon but you probably never heard about it because of the massive conspiracy.
Nov 5 2009 Shower With 3-D Wrap Around Touchscreen
Listen, I love standing in the shower watching full-length movies as much as the next water waster (which is why I just had a swimming pool sized hot water heater installed), but what's the matter with a traditional projection setup? I swear, people are always trying to one-up me. Too bad I know how to do that turtle shell trick in world 3-1 of the original Super Mario and can get unlimited one-ups. Suck it -- I will always out one-up you!
The Roca Waterdrop Shower Room surrounds you by a 3D touchscreen, allowing you to watch movies while you bathe. The touchscreen also allows you to control the temperature of the water and the intensity of the jets.
I mean, sure if you want to be tacky about it. I think we can all agree the touchscreen is a little much. I would have gone with voice-control. AND WHERE ARE THE LASER EXFOLIATORS? Cheapskates.
Nov 3 2009 Giant Crack In Africa Could Be Future Ocean
Because I love news heralding the end of the world as much as you do, I just read a large crack has recently formed in Ethiopia and may house a future ocean after the apocalypse of 2012.
A 35-mile rift in the desert of Ethiopia will likely become a new ocean eventually, researchers now confirm.
The crack, 20 feet wide in spots, opened in 2005 and some geologists believed then that it would spawn a new ocean. But that view was controversial, and the rift had not been well studied.A new study involving an international team of scientists and reported in the journal Geophysical Research Letters finds the processes creating the rift are nearly identical to what goes on at the bottom of oceans, further indication a sea is in the region's future.
Note: That's not an actual photo of the crack there, that's just a picture I ripped off the internet. However, I will use this time to propose that the Grand Canyon will also house a future ocean. I called it first! Unless it doesn't happen, in which case it was your idea. Idiot.
Giant Crack in Africa Will Create a New Ocean [yahoonews]
Thanks to Josh, who's smart enough to know the oceans were created when God cried after realizing just how beautiful he'd made me.
Oct 9 2009 Yeah, But Can It Fly?: Amphibious WaterCar Does 60MPH On Both Land And Sea
The $200,000 WaterCar is the lovechild of a Corvette that fell in love with a cigarette boat. But, like having sex with a mermaid, everyone will tell you it was just a manatee.
Get a Corvette engine, rig it up with a Dominator Jet drive, and then strap it into a floating car, and you get the WaterCar Python, the fastest and highest-performing amphibious vehicle in the world. If zipping over the water at a top speed of 60mph doesn't float your boat, it'll accelerate on land at a neck-snapping 0-to-60 speed of a mere 4.5 seconds.
Call me old fashioned, but I like all my vehicles single-purpose. If it drives on the road, I don't want it in the ocean or sky. I mean, that's just more stuff to go wrong. And wrong, my friends, is the opposite of right. And two Wrights made an airplane. ZING! Thanks for that one, dad.
Hit the jump for several more shots and a video of the thing in action (worthwhile stuff starts at 0:50).
Continue Reading " Yeah, But Can It Fly?: Amphibious WaterCar Does 60MPH On Both Land And Sea "
Oct 1 2009 Looks Safe To Me: A Power Line Bridge
This is a picture of Philippine residents using power lines as a bridge in wake of the recent Typhoon Ketsana (bitch). EDIT: It is sad and Geekologie wishes everyone affected the best. Plus jetpacks.
Using Power Lines as a Bridge Seems Incredibly Dangerous [gizmodo]
Sep 14 2009
Starry Nights Baths: Nirvana LED Bathtub
I haven't taken a bath since I was too short to see over the side of the tub, so I don't need a fancy bath fixture. But maybe you do. I heard women take a lot of baths because it makes shaving easier. Speaking of which, what do women shave anyways? I suspect it's their chests!
The Nirvana Bathtub is basically an normal tub that's been outfitted with 360 LED lights on the surface. Touch controls allow you to adjust the lights as well as the water, and a hand shower is motion activated.
Pfft, screw a LED tub -- I'm holding out for a laser bath! I'm gonna get all prune-y and blind at the same time. Just sayin', vision is for the weak and I can benchpress the bar plus 45lbs on each side!
Nirvana bathtub combines a bathtub and a planetarium [dvice]
Aug 28 2009 Kitty Noises, Autotune Used To Make Song
This is song made using videos of kitty sounds that have been auto-tuned (think Kanye West, but with less bitching and whining) to produce some funky fresh beats. Yes, I am hip to your jive. I'm a cool cat, you dig? I jest, I am a warm dog. And speaking of which -- in college I lived in a house with five other guys, and we had this one roommate who would always boil hotdogs in the same pot of water and then lid the pot and save the water for next time. Dude got mad pissed if you even joked about touched his hotdog water. And that pot would sit there on the stove for sometimes a week between boilings. He was convinced it gave each subsequent batch of dogs more flavor. We were convinced it gave us dysentery.
Thanks to Tom and Edd, who once made a song with their voices synthesized to sound like Chipmunks but then deleted it when they realized that shit's not cool.
Aug 28 2009 Perfect With A Lead Vest: The X-Ray Umbrella
The x-ray umbrella is an umbrella with x-rays all over the damn place. It does NOT allow you to see through a woman's shirt. Unless she's wearing white and it's pouring out, in which case, yes, it does do that. And I've got to tell you: as a guy who's broken his arm twice in the same place and now has a plate and a bunch of screws in there (I am NOT a robot, just a man with an advanced biomechanical arm), I'm no stranger to x-rays. Or those gamma joints. You hear that, Hulk? I will arm wrestle the shit out of you!
Aug 21 2009 Creepy: An Edward Cullen Shower Curtain
Because it's a well known fact vampires are pervbags that like to stare at you while you piss, here's a custom Edward Cullen shower curtain. It was handpainted by Etsy seller CustomShowerCurtains and will set you back a cool 75 bones. Now, you may be wondering why I'm posting a Twilight shower curtain in the first place. And the answer to that, my friends, is for the womens. Apparently they love this shit. Also, shoes and cooking. DO I KNOW THEM OR WHAT?!
Thanks to Jay, who caught Bella watching him projectile vomit after a long night of drinking.
Aug 14 2009 Solar Shower Provides Hot Water In 2 Hours
The $200 Solar Power Shower can heat up to 8 liters of water to 140° Fahrenheit in as little as two hours, provided it's outside in the sun and not in your basement.
It's a lot more sophisticated than a simple camping solar shower, because this one mixes that 140° water with cool water from the garden hose, giving you plenty of toasty warm water at just the right temperature.
Impressive, but I don't really have a need for a solar powered shower. I do, however, have a need for that chick in the picture. Seriously, I'm getting hungry. HIYO!
Aug 12 2009 Kettle Plays Song Instead Of Just Whistling
The Musical Kettle, designed by Naoki Kawamoto, has some sort of electronically controlled flute attachment that allows the device to play a song instead of just a boring whistle when the water is boiling. Now, are you thinking what I'm thinking? If you answered, "rocking out with your teabags out to some Jethro Tull", you are. HEY AQUALUNG!
Aug 10 2009 That Was Quick: How Not To Wash A Car
This is a great example of how not to wash a car. Another example is driving your car into a neighbor's pool. Which, I already told you, I'll have out of there just as soon as I can rent a crane.
Thanks to Joemo, who once drove a convertible through a car wash and ruined the interior.
Aug 6 2009 Pfft, I Could Do That: Monster Waterslide Jump
Even if this is fake, I could do it in real life. Except twice as far, and with an infinite times more flips (front AND back) BECAUSE I AM KING OF WATER SLIDES. You hear me? THE KING! Go ahead, try to push me off, I dare you. You can't do it can yo-- WHOA, WHOA, WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Spectacular waterslide daredevil [dvice]
Thanks to Nate, steve, Jake and brown, who would have done it with a rocketpack and skis on.
Jul 31 2009 Wear This *snicker*: Bikini Dissolves In Water
Wow, just typing snicker makes me want a Snickers bar. Does it do that to you too? Please circle yes or no and pass this note back to me in between classes. So anyway, a seemingly ordinary bikini that dissolves when it gets wet. That's something.
Sellers in Germany bill the dissolving Get Naked costume as a chance for men to get their own back after a break-up.
But women's rights campaigner Rosmarie Zapfl stormed: "It is an absolute insult to women that this has been invented."
It really is though. Which is exactly why I just bought every last one of them so no woman will have to experience that humiliation. Also, ladies -- pool party at my house! No need to bring anything, I've got a ton of suits *snicker*. Damnit I did it again.
Dissolving Bikini is the Ultimate Revenge Gift [spike]
and
Teeny weeny dissolvable bikini [thesun]
Thanks to Steven, william and slammer, who only wear thong-backed bathing suits because they're cheeky.
Jul 29 2009 Why?: Jellyfish Toys Go In Your Water Bottle
Bandai is selling these $6 jellyfish toys that you put in your water bottle to keep you company when you're doing whatever sad, lonely thing you do that's led you to buy a $6 piece of plastic to keep you company. But hey, I'm not judging (I just ordered thirty). They come in jellyfish, squid and octopus varieties and present a choking hazard to all people under 150. GOTTA CHOKE ON 'EM ALL!
Several more shots after the jump.
Continue Reading " Why?: Jellyfish Toys Go In Your Water Bottle "
Jul 17 2009 WTF Is That!?: 12-Mile Biological Goo In Arctic
A 12-mile long trail of unknown biological goo has been spotted off the coast of Alaska. Personally, it looks like robot love-oil to me (don't ask how I know). *ahem* I'm looking at you, Optimus.
"It's certainly biological," Hasenauer said. "It's definitely not an oil product of any kind. It has no characteristics of an oil, or a hazardous substance, for that matter.
"It's definitely, by the smell and the makeup of it, it's some sort of naturally occurring organic or otherwise marine organism.""It's pitch black when it hits ice and it kind of discolors the ice and hangs off of it," Brower said. He saw some jellyfish tangled up in the stuff, and someone turned in what was left of a dead goose -- just bones and feathers -- to the borough's wildlife department.
ZOMG, it's the North Carolina sewer mutant's illegitimate older cousin! Now I'm not saying I want to deep fry some and include it in my Octo-taco-pancrepe-pizza, because I don't. But I would smear some all over your body and lick it off. God, am I romantic or what?
Hit the jump for a picture of a bucketful of the gunk.
Continue Reading " WTF Is That!?: 12-Mile Biological Goo In Arctic "
Jun 22 2009 Girl Electrocutes Herself Tweeting In Bathtub
Following in the trend of tweeting from the bathroom, a 17-year old Romanian girl died while apparently trying to Twitter from the tub (this new loofah feels great!).
The Austrian times says that Maria Barbu was, in fact, in the tub while using Twitter when she likely reached to plug in her charger with a wet hand, electrocuting herself in the process.
As much fun as I do want to make of Maria, you really can't blame her. Women understanding electricity? BWHAHAH AHAH HA HA! God, I needed that.
Girl Dies by Electrocution While Twitting in Bathtub, Apocalypse Draws Nearer [gizmodo]
Thanks to Julian, who once showered with a toaster but the bread got all soggy.
Jun 17 2009 Oh Great: NASA Plans To Blow Up The Moon
That's right folks, NASA plans to shoot a giant missile at the moon and make it go boom. BOOM SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE THE MOON!
In an unprecedented scientific endeavor -- and what may be one of the coolest space missions ever -- NASA is preparing to fly a rocket booster into the moon, triggering a six-mile-high explosion that scientists hope will confirm the presence of water.
The four-month mission of the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing Satellite (LCROSS), which will be directed from NASA's Ames Research Center at Moffett Field, is to discover whether water is frozen in the perpetual darkness of craters near the moon's south pole. As a potential source of oxygen for life support and hydrogen for rocket fuel, that water would be a tremendous boost to NASA's plans to restart human exploration of the moon.
Come on NASA -- as pro blowing stuff up as I am, there has got to be an easier way to find out if there's water on the moon. Like, oh I dunno, ASKING THE MOON PEOPLE. Hey, moon-chick, is there water in the moon? "ZIP ZAP ZIP YES WE DRINK IT". Ta-da, mystery solved. But while you're here, how about flashing those blue cheese boobs in my direction one more time?
NASA/Ames ready to explode one of the coolest space missions ever [siliconvalley]
Thanks to meeotch, who wants to ride the rocket when it goes. Me too, meeotch, me too.
Jun 10 2009 Iceberg, Dead Ahead!: Your Own R/C Titanic
Want a 1:150 (~6-foot) R/C scale model of the Titanic? These monster water gobbling whores allegedly have over 300 handmade parts and take over 400 man-hours to complete. You can buy them too, provided you've got a cool $2,500 lying around. Which, if you do, WHAT'S THAT OVER THERE? *sockful of pennies you in the face* Haha, the boat is mine! TOOT TOOOOT! [Insert joke about going down on my ship]
Product Page
via
Remote-controlled scale model of the Titanic is asking for trouble [dvice]
