Jun 25 2009 No Thanks: World's Largest Alarm Clock
The world's largest alarm clock is actually the sun, but I'll look past that for the sake of this scary bitch, who's convinced he's made the largest. Now I don't want to ruin the video for you, but there is absolutely no way he originally designed that as an alarm.
The World's Biggest Alarm Clock [geekygadgets]
Thanks to MaverickPS, who wakes up the way God intended: with a dog licking his face.
Dec 24 2008 Blast Out Of Bed With The Rocket Alarm!
The $25 Rocket Launcher Alarm Clock is phallic as hell and I want one really badly. When it's time to wake up the rocket ship blasts off -- and you have to retrieve said rocket and replace it on the base for the beeping to stop. Alternatively, you can break the base. And while this certainly isn't the worst way to wake up, it is a close second behind the SWAT team busting into your bedroom. Those guys act like they've never seen a little morning wood before. Somebody fetch the proverbial buck saw -- this timber looks like a two-man job.
rocket launcher alarm clock blasts into orbit to wake you up [technabob]
Thanks to Julian, who requires like 16 diamond-toothed chainsaws to dispatch his morning lumber.
Sep 4 2008 Gun O'Clock: It's Time To Shoot Something!
The Gun O'Clock is similar in design to this alarm, and puts a new spin on the "annoying as all hell" alarm clock market. When the "Pi Pi Pi Pi Pi Pi Pi" alarm sounds, a target pops up and you have to shoot the bullseye enough times to stop the noise and reset the target. The $40 alarm is currently available for preorder and is sure to make getting up a lot more shooty. Or you can do what I do and do a little bedroom skeet shooting in the morning. Pull! BLAM BLAM Damn, I am the L337 shooter. Did you see that, honey? Honey? Oh shit. Quick, somebody help me flip the mattress.
Product Page
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Morning Target Practice- Gun O'clock [rinkya]
Aug 5 2008 Wake Up To Meat: The Wake N' Bacon
The Wake n' Bacon is a collaborative alarm clock design by Matty Sallin, Daniel Bartolini and Hsiao-huh Hsu. It wakes you up with the delicious scent of bacon instead of beeping. How?
A frozen strip of bacon is placed in Wake n' Bacon the night before. Because there is a 10 minute cooking time, the clock is set to go off 10 minutes before the desired waking time. Once the alarm goes off, the clock it sends a signal to a small speaker to generate the alarm sound. We hacked the clock so that the signal is re-routed by a microchip that in responds by sending a signal to a relay that throws the switch to power two halogen lamps that slow-cook the bacon in about 10 minutes.
Simple as that. No loud noises, no breaking your alarm, just delicious bacon. Now what you need to do is keep a mini-fridge by the bed so you can toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later you can't see your penis past your pork-gut anymore because you've been eating two pounds of bacon every morning.
Thanks Mac and Liz, now make one that can cook an egg and biscuit too.
May 14 2008 Another Annoying Alarm Clock To Break
Here at Geekologie we've had no shortage whatsoever of ridiculous alarm clocks that use various annoying methods to get you out of bed and ready for another horrible day of life. But here comes another anyways. When the $40 Puzzle Alarm Clock goes off it launches three puzzle pieces out of the base. You then have to find said pieces and return them to their respective resting places. It sounds like a freaking disaster waiting to happen. I would have that thing smashed to bits before you could say "where's the star piece?" Mostly because I never learned my shapes. That's right -- I was the kid in kindergarten that tried to wedge the square peg into the round hole and glued his head to his cot during naptime. But look at me now -- on top of the freaking world. Okay, maybe just on top of house. I'm gonna jump!
Puzzle Alarm Clock Looks Seriously Infuriating [uberreview]
Mar 13 2008 Pillow Brightens To Wake You Up Gradually
The Glo Pillow is a foam pillow with alarm clock innards. 40 minutes before your desired wake time it slowly begins lighting its integrated LEDs to gently bring you back to reality. Apparently it's a much more natural way to rise in the morning that a traditional alarm. It sure as hell is a better way to get up than the fire bell alarm clock, but maybe not as nice as the Orgasmo Alarm Clock. You know, it's not so much that I love sleep and hate the prospect of a new day that makes opening my eyes in the morning so tough. Nope, it's chronic pink eye.
Glo Pillow Wakes You Up Gently [ohgizmo]
Feb 12 2008 Computer Mug Is Surprisingly Conceptual
Jason Farsai has conceptualized the Yuno PC, which is a computer in a coffee mug. He envisions the device having all the necessary morning computer applications: weather, time, traffic, stock prices, comic strips, and email. You can also upload your own screensaver images and just stare blankly at your coffee mug until 11 am like I do. Neat I guess, but completely impractical. Oh, and there's no mention of it being dishwasher safe, so that's, uh, a pretty major design flaw as far as I'm concerned. You got me, I only posted this because of those delicious looking griddle cakes in the picture. Huh? What do you mean it's an English muffin? Are you sure? Shit, well I'd still pound those hash browns.
Several more pictures after the jump.
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