Nov 20 2008 WTF Is That?: Weird Super Mario Cartoon
This is part of a Super Mario cartoon. It's called Super Mario: Depression. Hit the jump to see the whole thing, I had to cut it into three pieces just to get it up. It's freaking weird. And kind of made me sad. A world with a depressed Mario is no world I want to live in.
Places to move:
outerspace
your mom's house
your house
Washington D.C.
Candyland
Mushroom Kingdom
Hit it to check the whole thing out.
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Jun 20 2008 Here Grandma, I Got You A Pretty Snow Globe
Snow globes are glass spheres filled with little scenes and some plastic snow that whirls around when you shake the thing. These ones just happen to be filled with very unusual scenes. Like, well, a police officer putting a bullet in some dude's melon. There's a shit-ton more after the jump, which I suggest you peruse because I just spent like thirty hundred billion hour-years editing them and posting them for you. They were all made by artists Walter Martin and Paloma Munoz and are part of a limited edition of 250 pieces. Each goes for about $750.
These two artists have been working together since 1993. They sculpt miniature figures set in snowy outside scenes that depict sometimes horrible situations. Each snow globe tells a story and it's up to the viewer to fill in the blanks of those stories. Some of these miniature people seem trapped in a fairy-tale like story.
So what's the story behind the scene in that globe? My guess is an officer is practicing his close range shooting skills on the back of some guy's head while another copper watches and, quite possibly, gets aroused. Freaking classic, just like mom used to read me before bed.
Hit the jump for a ton more (men throwing kids down a well, gun toting grandmas, etc.) and feel free to fill in the stories if you want.
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Jun 11 2008 BMW Makes Morphable, Fabric-Covered Car
Yesterday BMW unveiled their GINA Visionary Model, a fabric-covered vehicle that can change shapes with the push of a button.
Chris Bangle (head of design at BMW) and his team actually built GINA -- which stands for "Geometry and functions In 'N' Adaptions" -- six years ago, but BMW kept it under, er, wraps until Tuesday. It's built on the Z8 chassis and has a 4.4-liter V8 and six-speed automatic transmission. BMW says the fabric skin - polyurethane-coated Lycra - is resilient, durable and water resistant. It's stretched over an aluminum frame controlled by electric and hydraulic actuators that allow the owner to change the body shape. Want a big spoiler on the back? Wider fenders? No problem. "The drastic reinterpretation of familiar functionality and structure means that drivers have a completely new experience when they handle their car," BMW says.
Neat idea BMW, but what's up with the gaudy silver skin? You put all that effort into building a morphable, fabric-covered car and don't even use denim? You got no class.
A TON more MUST SEE pictures and a video, along with links to much longer articles, after the jump.
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Jun 9 2008 Putter Pisser: Relieve Yourself Discreetly
I always thought when you were out on the links and had to pee you yelled 'Fore!' and pissed in a bunker or on a tree. Well apparently that's not kosher and you need a UroClub (Putter Pisser sounds better) urine collection device. I'm not so sure what's so discreet about pissing down the shaft of a fake golf club, but whatever.
Just place an inconspicuous towel over your junk, unscrew the cap of the club disguised to look like a 7-iron, and whiz away--up to half a liter. When you're done, stick the leak-proof club back in your bag and take your next shot.
The questionable device costs $50 and doesn't hold enough if you've been following the rules of golf and drinking the whole game. And that's why I'll be sticking to the sand traps. They typically provide good cover, and you can even drop some kids off at the beach if you have to. But remember: if you do, stay classy and cover them up like a cat does.
UroClub Lets Golfers Go Pee-Pee in Public [gizmodo]
Thanks Chris, and remind me to never shake your hand
May 20 2008 I've Seen It All Now: The Whiz Freedom
The Whiz Freedom is a horribly named "urine director" for women. First of all, I didn't know there was even a market for "urine directors", but secondly, now that I do, I think they should change the name of this product from Whiz Freedom to Fake Penis. Because I think that's what it is.
The Whiz Freedom preserves dignity and liberty whatever the circumstances. It gives women the choice to wee wherever and whenever they choose.Aside from allowing women to wee in a standing position, sitting down or lying down, the Whiz Freedom can be used in confined spaces such as in a car, a kayak, a small airplane or glider (you're up there for many hours), in a tent, a sleeping back, while chained to the stove, or while caving.
So ladies, if you're looking for the perfect $30 urine-soaked accessory to add to your purse, look no further. The Whiz Freedom -- Enabling women to pee like men since 2007.
A commercial for the thing after the jump. I don't want to ruin it for you, but it's a scene that I'm all too familiar with.
Mar 7 2008 3-Way Chess Is Chess Made For 3 People
3-way chess is a chessboard on which three people can play. The same rules apply except for some slight variation on moves made through the center of the board. Apparently this particular game was bought in the Czech Republic. And you know what else you can buy in the Czech Republic don't you? Absinthe. Yeah, I tried making my own once but drinking it made me go blind in one eye for a couple days. Just like the time I pleasured myself for fourteen hours straight.
Hit the link for another picture, along with a link to an explanation of the game.
