Oct 16 2009 Wicked Transformer Halloween Decorations
This is a video of some guy in Cleveland that made giant Bumblebee and Optimus Prime Halloween decorations. They are most impressive. Granted, some teenage jerks in the neighborhood are gonna wreck them, but they're still cool while they last. Not unlike snowmen. Which, funny story: last winter I saw one with a hotdog for a nose! I mean, who doesn't have carrots?!?! I suspect his eyes were dog turds.
Thanks to kat, Dave and Paul, who are all ready to transform and trick-or-treat the hell out.
Oct 12 2009 BEEP BOOP Arrrr!!: Transformer Pirate Shirts
These Piratron shirts come in Autopirate and Deceptipirate models and are perfect for showing your support for both high seas plundering AND vehicles that turn into talking robots at the same time. Each shirt will set you back a cool $20, and I recommend getting one of each just in case, well, I don't know why. Just do it. No I don't profit from these. But seriously, you can't have enough. Buy like thirty. Million. DO IT NOW!
Thanks to tim, who agrees that in the battle of pirates vs. robots, the ninjas will prevail.
Sep 29 2009 I'm Not Sitting On It: Real Robotic Transformer
This is a real-life Transformer (OmniZero.9, the brainchild of Takeshi Maeda) that can morph from a humanoid robot to a humanoid robot that can carry a person, to a wheeled cart. Just watch how scary it is when it moves. If I didn't know better, I'd swear there was a little person in there. But there isn't! Just wires and servos and a metallic heart of death. Which, true story, only beats for the destruction of the human race. And speaking of which: One time I competed in a three-legged race solo.
Hit the jump for a video of the robot battling another, much smaller one.
Continue Reading " I'm Not Sitting On It: Real Robotic Transformer "
Sep 17 2009 Cardboard Optimus Prime Costume On eBay
Well folks, Halloween is right around the corner, and you all know what that means: another night of standing in the corner a sad Ninja Turtle while you watch the Zombie Nurse of your dreams make out with a guy dressed as The Crow. :( Also, fun costumes!
A couple of years back I went slightly mad for 3 weeks and spent every evening and weekend carefully constructing an Optimus Prime costume for a summer party. Summer party came, the costume won me first prize, and hasn't seen the light of day since.
This auction is for that costume (pictured). If you've got a Fancy Dress/Halloween party coming up, this costume will impress - and not just impress Transformers geeks. The time I wore the costume easily equates to that 15 minutes of fame time we're all supposed to get - applause from the packed balcony of random pub goers, women who wouldn't normally give me a second look wanting to have their picture taken with me (the benefit of wearing a cool mask eh...) ;)
Current bidding for the cardboardbot is £11.06 (~$18) with three days remaining. Unfortunately, the costume is for pick up only because "the costume doesn't transform into a lorry and move by itself, so you'll need to come and collect". BWAHAHAHAHA! But seriously, what do you mean it doesn't transform?
Thanks to Sam, who is selling a cardboard Voltron costume that will get you laid quicker than you can say, "wait, didn't I meet you in the men's room?"
Jul 20 2009 Kid Drinks Gasoline To Be Like Transformer
Some 14-year old kid in China has been drinking gasoline since he was 9 to become more like a Transformer. Unfortunately, he's become more like an idiot moron.
The youngster was so impressed that he began drinking fuel on a daily basis to "obtain energy" and become a mighty warrior like the Transformers.
"Since my son start to drink gas, his intelligence quotient dropped sharply and he couldn't figure out addition and subtraction of sums within 100," the father said. "Before that, he was a very smart boy, and he could even repair the television. But now he doesn't know the answer of 7 plus 17."
To the boy's credit, I don't know what 7 plus 17 is either (87?). Still, I love the smell of gasoline as much as the next guy, but actually drinking it? That's just crazy talk. I love robots. So was that.
Transformers fan drank gasoline to gain energy [russiatoday]
via
Optimus Prime Cocktail [runawaytheologian]
Thanks to Anthony, who once drank bleach to be more like a washing machine.
Jul 6 2009 KILL IT!: Transformer Robot Really Tranforms
Miss me? I missed you. I hope everyone had a safe yet explosive weekend. Amazingly, I'm still alive and fingerful. Let me tell you: it wasn't easy. Now, let's return to our regularly scheduled program, shall we?
NASA, who I used to respect, wants to build a bunch of transformers to do their dirty work. *shaking head* And I used to want be an astronaut.
NASA wanted a robot that could start as 100 blocky modules dropped from an airplane to a desert, reconfigure into a rover that could drive to a sand dune, and then change again to "grow" legs and climb up it. Once the blocky robot reached the top, it would transform into a greenhouse that could protect a group of seeds for two weeks.
Only 20 of the modules were built during an ambitious project more than two years ago. But together, they are known as Superbot.
Now repeat after me, "All hail Superbot!" ZOMG -- A COUPLE OF YOU ACTUALLY DID IT! You make me sick.
Hit the jump to see two of the robot's other configurations.
Continue Reading " KILL IT!: Transformer Robot Really Tranforms "
Jun 20 2009 Pew Pew!: Guy Builds Bumblebee In Yard
As most of you probably know, the original Bumblebee was a Volkswagen Beetle. And as very few of you probably know, I still have the original toy around here somewhere because I'm gangster.
Tom Rhodes likes Transformers. So, naturally, he built an 18-foot-tall, 1,200-pound Bumblebee robot out of an old Volkswagen Beetle.
As you can see, Bumblebee protects Tom's windmill from the Decepticons. Because, fun fact: Decepticons HATE clean energy. Transform and recycle!
Man builds gigantic Bumblebee Transformer in his front yard [dvice]
Thanks to FDSY, who once tried switching the bodies on two of his old Transformer toys but it didn't work BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT G.I. JOE'S.
May 31 2009 Custom Optimus Prime Ring Has Ruby Eyes
This is a fully custom Optimus Prime ring created by deviantartist =Dans-Magic for a client. BLING BLING YOU DECEPTICON MOTHAJAMMERS!
A 14k custom piece. 50 hours from start to finish.
didnt want to put in the rubies but he wanted them. Originally I had carved the triangle eye sockets but it got wiped out with the setting of the stones.I molded it to make some without stones (stones optional)
Awesome, I want one for every finger. So seven. Damn you, shop class!
Hit the jump for a another shot of the ring and what it looks like made as a pendant.
Continue Reading " Custom Optimus Prime Ring Has Ruby Eyes "
May 19 2009 More Than Meets The Eye: Transformer USB Drive Is Awesomest I've Seen In A While
What do you buy for the man who has nothing? While you ponder that nugget of vast intellectuality, I'll tell you about this 2GB Transformer memory stick (which is way better than these ones). Probably the awesomest USB drive I've seen in forever, the unit transforms from a normal looking USB ding-dongle into Ravage, a fierce jungle cat Decepticon (which some believe to be a dog, WHICH HE IS NOT YOU WILL NOT RUIN MY CHILDHOOD). Available fro pre-order from the BigBadToyStore, this piece of badassery will set you back $43 and ships in September. But the question remains: shouldn't you avoid trusting a Decepticon with your porno?*
*Does Optimus Prime piss transmission fluid and wipe his ass with corrugated steel?**
**Bumblebee says so!
Product Page
via
Transforming Ravage Flash Drive [ohgizmo]
Thanks to Tank and Julian, who once convinced a Decepticon it was human and then broke its heart with a backhoe.
Mar 24 2009 British Scientists Producing Synthetic Blood
Apparently British scientists are ahead of everyone else in the race to produce a synthetic blood supply using stem cells. Go you, Britain, here's a teacake.
Because stem cells multiply indefinitely, it would be possible to enormous quantities, researchers said.
The cells can be made from universal donor embryos - the O-negative type - and can be guaranteed to be free of infections because they have never been inside a human.The idea of destroying embryos to create stem cells raises ethical issues, but in theory, just one embryo could meet the nation's needs.
Stem cells aside, I think the real issue is this: if synthetic blood is so readily available, how are we going to track the vampire population? I've seen Blade, those bastards are crafty. I suggest we start culling the herd now before it's too late. And speaking of culling -- I'll take care of Edward, you get the rest.
British scientists on course to become the first to produce synthetic human blood [dailymail]
Thanks to phuzzygish, who one made some pretty believable synthetic blood with corn syrup and food coloring.
Feb 25 2009 Sony Rolly Conducts AIBO Robotic Dog Army
I have no idea what I'm watching, but I'll tell you one thing: I don't like the look of it. This red sore on my palm either. And I don't even play video games! What are you trying to insinuate? That sock is a liar!
Thanks to Bro_mole, who is ready to stomp those little bastards as soon as they try to transform and roll out.
Jan 16 2009 Optimouse Prime: The Mickey Transformer
Apparently this Mickey Mouse-Transformer mashup was on display at this week's Tokyo Toy Forum and is being manufactured for sale late next month. The morphing mouse will set you back about 40 pieces of cheese and is perfect for both Disney and Transformer fans. Plus, if you know somebody who's both, you can count it as both their birthday AND Christmas presents. Sure that would make you a giant cheapskate, but who cares, I already saw you taking extra hot sauce packets from Taco Bell. Haha, you thought I didn't notice, did you, you little cheapskate?*
*Bring me some Fire.
DeceptaToon: Mickey Mouse Transformer debuts in Japan [dvice]
Thanks to Riche-con-carnie, who would probably taste great with a little extra hotsauce.
Nov 26 2008 Fonts Are Fun!: An Optima Prime T-Shirt
Remember the dead celebrity font ads from last month? Well in the same vein comes this Optima Prime t-shirt -- made entirely out of the Optima font! Wow, will the fun never end? The shirts start at $13.75, but if you want one that won't disintegrate the first time you wash it you're looking at more like $20. And speaking of $20, did you know that Andrew Jackson was nicknamed "Old Hickory"? It's true, the man had a wooden johnson.
Thanks to Neil, who may or may not be the man behind the Transformer mask.
Oct 30 2008 Transformers That Didn't Make The Cut
This is a little art gallery of Transformers that didn't make the cut. Transfailures, if you will. They're still scary as hell though, and I've always suspected my vacuum was a robot in disguise. Which is why i smashed it into a million pieces. And guess what? The broom and dustpan turned out to be robots too! But seriously, goddamn is the floor dirty in here.
Hit the jump for the rest of the gallery, of which only the last picture gave me some hope for the impending robot apocalypse.
Oct 24 2008 Almost Transformers, Almost Funny
Almost Transformers is a skit by Australian comedians Merrick and Rosso in which they don refrigerator and clothes dryer costumes and try to scare people walking by. I thought it was okay. Out of four stars I give it Pluto.
Thanks to Roberto, who needs no transformation to be devilishly handsome.
Oct 16 2008 Apparently Optimus Is A Saints Fan Too
What's up with all my heroes being New Orleans Saints fans? First Master Chief, and now Optimus Prime. You'd think at least one of them would root for the Redskins or Steelers. But noooo, they're all New Orleans fans. Maybe it's Mardi Gras. Granted, loving boobs is a hero prerequisite.
On a side note, I really am gonna be in New Orleans this weekend, so let's meet up and wrestle some f***in' gators! Or, I dunno, something else.*
*I'm thinking boobs.
Saints' Fans' Signs of the Times [blogofneworleans]
Thanks to Alejandro, who may or may not live in New Orleans, but if he does, better let me puke on his shoes this weekend. Now transform and onside kick out!
Aug 26 2008 Move Over, Goblin Shark: Robots Are Scarier
I told you. I told you robots would kill us all. This is a clip from a new BBC show, The Wrong Door, which is about robots and how much they want to hurt us. And speaking of the wrong door, I accidentally opened my roommate's after grabbing a snack in the middle of the night. Hello anime comic, hello penis in hand! Hello awkward silence, lifelong scarring, new roommate wanted ad.
The Wrong Door: If Terry Gilliam Directed Transformers as a TV Variety Show [gizmodo]
Jul 29 2008 Homemade Transfomer Out Of Cigarette Box
This is a stop-motion video of some cigarette box Transformers. Well, they're not all cigarette boxes. I distinctly recall matchbox and condom box robots as well. The video is pretty well made although I did feel a seizure coming on a couple times. Did I mention this is probably old and you've already seen it before? You probably downloaded it off some Transformer forum in the early 90's when you were using CompuServe dialup at 14.4 kbit/s and pkunzipping nudey pics off the 3½ floppy your friend gave you. Please, tell me the story, I'm here to listen.
Youtube
Thanks to Lee, lord of audio, for the tip
Jul 15 2008 Evan, 5, Gets Transformers Cake For Birthday
Evan, a 5-year old from Whoknows, Orcares, got a Transformers cake for his birthday. As you can see, it's fairly well made and features a lead-based Transformers logo on top. But don't eat the figurines, Evan, or your fifth birthday may transform into your last. HAHA AHAH! Seriously though, Evan, I had a real-life Transformer at my 5th birthday. He started off as my dad, but after a bottle of Evan Williams transformed into a guy that made out with the magician's assistant and sat on my cake.
Hit the jump for a close-up of the logo.
Continue Reading " Evan, 5, Gets Transformers Cake For Birthday "
Jul 2 2008 Good Looking: Optimus 'Scrap Metal' Prime
Being a Transformer and all, we've seen Optimus Prime in a variety of different forms. And here comes another -- scrap metal. Optimus 'Scrap Metal' Prime is made entirely out of welded metal and makes for some serious eye/tetanus candy. Made by Robot-Models, this particular Optimus stands over 7-feet tall, weighs 550 pounds, and costs a whopping $6,896. If you like the style but can't afford to drop a few grand, they also have smaller models in the several hundred dollar range (pictures after the jump). But, being the Geekologist, I had to drop for the big daddy. It arrived yesterday, and guess what my wife had the nerve to ask -- "What in the hell is that piece of junk?" She should have known better. "He's not junk" I replied, "he's an early divorce present for myself."
Hit the jump for two more pictures of this model and a couple of the smaller ones.
Continue Reading " Good Looking: Optimus 'Scrap Metal' Prime "
