Nov 18 2009 Today Only: Zombie Vampire Robots Shirts

If you're not familiar with shirt.woot, congratulations, and welcome to the internet. There's lots of stuff in this series of tubes, including, and virtually limited to: misinformation and porn. Also, Geekologie and stuff for sale. And speaking of stuff for sale, $10 will get you this Zombie Vampire Robots from Space shirt (shipped!) TODAY ONLY. I could take this time to explain how shirt.woot and woot.com work and even brag about the number of bags of crap I've gotten (ZERO BABY, YEAH!) but I'm not going to. If you want the shirt, go buy it, if not, don't come crying to me tomorrow when you decide you want it after all and it's not for sale anymore. Because you know what you'll get? A cold shoulder penis Popsicle shoulder.

UPDATE: Sold out, sorry chumps. May appear again in the reckoning.

Shirt.woot (will be a different shirt tomorrow)

Thanks to Melissa, Julian, Aaron and Kiraly, who have gotten little to no work done during the current woot-off. Nice, guys, glad you don't work for me.

Nov 5 2009 What Space Invaders Actually Look Like

This is an $18 Threadless shirt depicting what 8-bit Space Invaders actually look like in 3-D. Pretty amazing, huh? I know, I thought they were giant 2-D bugs as well. Really turns your whole world upside down, doesn't it? Like finding out your parents are swingers.

Product Site
via
8-Bit Invaders Are Perfectly Formed [fashionablygeek]

Thanks to Amanda, who just realized Aunt Beth and Uncle Simon weren't actually relatives. Sorry, Amanda.

Nov 3 2009 I'd Rock It: 'I Be Au Sm' Geek Shirts For Sale

This is a Threadless shirt titled 'I Be Au Sm' that was designed by Lawrence Villanueva. If you look carefully and are super observant it spells 'GEEK' whether you read top to bottom or left to right, but NOT right to left. Then it spells 'EGKE' or 'EKGE', neither of which is an SAT word, SO WHO CARES? $18 scores you the shirt and some geeky pride. And speaking of prides: RAWR! rawr! RAWR! RAWR! Get it? Lions, silly!

Product Site

Thanks to The Phat Fat Man, who is awesomely robust.

Oct 29 2009 A-Ha!: So THAT'S How Twins Are Made

This is a cute pair of twins rocking Mac copy/paste shirts. There's a shot of twin boys after the jump wearing the Microsoft equivalent. Honestly, did you know this was how twins were made? Because I didn't. I just thought you had to do it twice in a row!

Hit the jump for the boys.

Continue Reading " A-Ha!: So THAT'S How Twins Are Made "

Oct 27 2009 Clever, Very Clever: Three Worf Moon T-Shirt

Well there's the original three wolf moon t-shirt, a three keyboard cat moon t-shirt, and a three Teen Wolf moon t-shirt, so why not a three Worf moon t-shirt? I have no idea if these are actually for sale, but send me $25 and a blank t-shirt and I'll see if I can't iron one on for you. Sadly, I won't be able to.

Picture

Thanks to Blastphemer and Riker, who don't have to wear shirts because they're so hairy. Gross.

Oct 25 2009 For A Very Limited Time: Dino-Arm T-Shirts

Even while I write this the clock is ticking. There are only 13 hours left to order this shirt (or save the image so you can blow it up and print it yourself) before it's gone forever. And, because I'm slow, by the time this actually gets posted you'll probably have less than 12. $11 gets the shirt sent anywhere in the continental US via a combination of airplanes and ground transport vehicles. Get one for yourself and a lady-friend and then challenge her to a dino arm wrestling competition! Wow, did I really just hold your hand and walk you to second base? I think I did! (Don't forget to send a thank you)

TeeFury (will be a different shirt tomorrow, so order if you want it)

Thanks to two sledgehammers dennis, who BOOM....BOOM!

Oct 22 2009 I'd Rock It: The Three Teen Wolf T-Shirt

It was only a matter of time before somebody smoked enough weed to realize how cool a Three Teen Wolf Moon t-shirt would be, and here it is. Available from 80's Tees for 20 silver bullets, the shirt is sure to be a hit at parties. Mostly sausage parties, but still, you might make some friends.

Product Site

Thanks to chris, who howls at the moon to attract girls. He's a furry lover!

Oct 12 2009 BEEP BOOP Arrrr!!: Transformer Pirate Shirts

These Piratron shirts come in Autopirate and Deceptipirate models and are perfect for showing your support for both high seas plundering AND vehicles that turn into talking robots at the same time. Each shirt will set you back a cool $20, and I recommend getting one of each just in case, well, I don't know why. Just do it. No I don't profit from these. But seriously, you can't have enough. Buy like thirty. Million. DO IT NOW!

Product Site

Thanks to tim, who agrees that in the battle of pirates vs. robots, the ninjas will prevail.

Aug 24 2009 Do Want: This Human Ingredients T-Shirt

This is $20 t-shirt listing the ingredients of human bodies in percentage order from largest to smallest. Did you know we're 0.25% sulfur? Because maybe that's why you smell so bad. Or maybe it's just your upper lip! BUUUUUUUURN. Your momma wears army boots and dresses you funny!

Product Site

Thanks to Towhee Monster, who is actually 100% awesome.

Jul 31 2009 A-Ha!: So That's The Other Half Of The Battle

This $20 t-shirt depicts what the other, more mysterious half of a G.I. Joe battle is. Now I would have guessed it's a pork chop sandwich/body massage combo, but what do I know? Besides, oh I dunno, EVERYTHING AND THEN SOME. Numbers? I KNOW MY NUMBERS. You + me + ice cream = <3

Product Site

Thanks to Julian and Rastapopolous, who sunshine day ya a time for de bus rida.

Jul 21 2009 Magical: This Three Keyboard Cat Moon Shirt

If the 3 Wolf Moon Shirt was magical, imagine the spells you'll be able to cast with this $20 3 Keyboard Cat Moon Shirt! I mean, it combines the sorcery of the 3 wolf moon shirt AND keyboard cat. Rumor has it, the shirt is so powerful it brought somebody's grandmother back to life and got her pregnant. Seriously, I'm not making this up. Yes I am. It was actually somebody's grandfather. Play me off, keyboard cat!

Product Site

Thanks to Travis, who once wore a 3 Keyboard Cat Moon shirt to a concert and got to sing with the band on stage.

Jul 17 2009 I Smell A Wedgie Coming: Resident Evil Shirts

This Resident Evil shirt was made to promote the upcoming Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles and will be distributed at the upcoming San Diego Comic Con next weekend.

Well, since Darkside Chronicles is an M-Rated title, we have to have an area where only 17+ are allowed. We figured if we had to be enclosed; we might as well deck out the room and give you an awesome experience playing the game. We are going to have two separate rooms to show off the game, both dark and air conditioned, and each come equipped with banging sound systems.

All you have to do is bring a friend, play through one of the levels in co-op mode, and then you and your partner get to walk away with your very own zombie shirt. Simple.

Neat. Just be careful rocking zombie mode in public, because I, for one, won't hesitate to brain you with a shovel. Brain first, kick corpses later. AND NO COPPING FEELS. This is the word of the Geekologie Writer.

Capcom Comic Con 09: Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles [capcom]

Thanks to Jonah, towhee and meeotch, who are all elite zombie hunters sent back from the future to....oh my God you're robots.

May 23 2009 He's An Addict!: Mario Buying Mushrooms

This is a new $18 shirt from Threadless that features Mario buying drugs from his little mushroom-headed dealer. As you can see, one star coin scores three whole shrooms, which is a pretty good deal if you ask me. But who's asking me? YO MAMA. Ooooh, burn! But seriously, this reminds me of the time I was duped into buying a bag of oregano for $40 and, knowing good and well what it was, still smoked it. ZOMG I got sooooo crunked!

Hit the jump for two shots of what the shirt looks like on bodies.

Continue Reading " He's An Addict!: Mario Buying Mushrooms "

Feb 23 2009 Yay, Get Your Own Spider Drawing T-Shirt

Like the saying goes, "a picture's worth a thousand words, but a picture of a spider should be worth at least $233.95". I couldn't agree more. And now you can own a t-shirt with the iconic drawing of a spider for only $14.50. Or, you can print this picture out, tape it to an undershirt, and effectively save yourself $14.50. Now I'm not saying that's what you should do, I'm just saying that's what I did -- and I'm a fashionista. Suck it, Karl Lagerfeld, you....you are creepy.

Product Page

Thanks to jigga, who wears a scorpion-drawing shirt, but it just doesn't have the same appeal. It does, however, have pit-stains.

Feb 18 2009 Toadstool Brains: A Super Mario Zombie Shirt

Zombie Mario, who would have thought? Not me, but that's because I'm not creative. One time in grade school our teacher told us to draw a made-up animal and I drew a cat. I did not receive full credit. And that, dear reader, is how I developed a stuttering problem. But that's neither here nor there, just traumatizing. This Zombario t-shirt costs $16 and features everybody's favorite mushroom munchin' fool out on the prowl for brains. And as you can see, he found some. Toadstool's. Ha, he's probably tripping his ass off right now, just look at his eyes. So dreamy. *swoon*

zombie mario must have run out of extra lives [technabob]

Feb 12 2009 Donkey Kong T-Shirt Turns Man Into Ape

Ever wanted to pretend you were an ape? Well you don't need a novelty t-shirt. You just crouch down real low and drag your knuckles on the ground and grunt a whole bunch. That's what I do, and I, my friends, was a gorilla for Halloween one year. The defense rests. Anyway, for a spine-tingling $28 you can get this (probably unlicensed) Donkey Kong t-shirt. And speaking of Donkey Kong, the snow levels in Donkey Kong Country -- ugh! I threw my controller at the TV not once, not twice, but twenty-thrice. SCREW YOU, STUPID SPINNING LAUNCH BARRELS! And, while I'm at it, suck it Zelda II! Wait, was that....blasphemous? Oh my God, what have I done?

Product Site

Thanks to Russell, who needs no excuse to hurl barrels at unsuspecting plumbers.

Feb 2 2009 I Ain't Afraid Of No Ghostbuster T-Shirt

This is a $26 t-shirt from 80'stees that makes you look like Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbuster. Plus, the slime glows so even in a dark bar people will know you just got slimed. Or had sex with an alien. In which case, high five.

Product Page
via
Ghostbusters Uniform T-Shirt [uniquedaily]

Thanks to Victoria, who has the sweetest pair of ghosts you've never seen.

Jan 21 2009 I Like: A Sweet LEGO-Inspired T-Shirt

This is a completely unlicensed t-shirt from Fuzzy Ink that features a LEGO minifig trying on different heads. It'll set you back $16 if you want one and comes in three color choices: gray. Which head would you wear? I'm leaning towards the one with the eyepatch or the hooker. Oh, now I can't decide. F*** it, I'm wearing them one on top of the other. "Yaaaar, you scurvy-ridden seaslugs!" "Handjobs, $10."

Product Page

Thanks to Justin, who bought one and promises to wear it on twin-day so we match.

Dec 12 2008 No More Going Bare Chest: Geeky T-Shirts

This is a gallery of geeky t-shirt designs from some guy named Glenn Jones. Hit the jump for a bunch more of my favorites and a link to his store which has even more. They're all $20 a pop and the perfect thing to keep you from showing your tits this holiday season. Unless you're a chick and into that. In which case I call a motorboat.

Hit it for the rest.

Continue Reading " No More Going Bare Chest: Geeky T-Shirts "

Nov 26 2008 Fonts Are Fun!: An Optima Prime T-Shirt

Remember the dead celebrity font ads from last month? Well in the same vein comes this Optima Prime t-shirt -- made entirely out of the Optima font! Wow, will the fun never end? The shirts start at $13.75, but if you want one that won't disintegrate the first time you wash it you're looking at more like $20. And speaking of $20, did you know that Andrew Jackson was nicknamed "Old Hickory"? It's true, the man had a wooden johnson.

Product Page

Thanks to Neil, who may or may not be the man behind the Transformer mask.