Nov 18 2009 Awh Yeah: Superhero Shaggin' Wagons

This is a little gallery of superhero shaggin' wagons. They're all Photoshopped, but that isn't stopping me from wanting to sleep in one. Gosh, I can't even remember the last time I made love in the back of a 70's van BECAUSE I BLACKED OUT LAST NIGHT. But seriously, I barely knew the guy and he said he had free candy.

Hit the jump for five more and a link to like six more after that. Jackpot!

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Nov 17 2009 Some Superhero You Are!: Spiderman Busted

Well folks, this just goes to show you can only dangle from rooftops staring into women's bedroom windows for so long before the boys in blue take notice. For shame, Spidey, for shame. And, on a completely and totally unrelated note that has absolutely nothing to do with this story: I have a used repelling harness for sale.

Spiderman getting arrested [jonahray]

Oct 16 2009 I Like: Superheroes In Old War Photographs

This is a little gallery of old photographs with pictures of superheroes Photohaxored in. I thought they were pretty neat, but perhaps you don't. And maybe that's the fundamental difference between you and I. Well, besides how handsome and smart you are. Did I say you? I meant me. It's true, one time I looked in a mirror and it shattered itself because it was so jealous of my handsomosity (and word wizardry). I jest -- I was so ugly I put my fist through it. REFLECT ON THAT, YOU STUPID MIRROR! Also, my hand bled and this nancy Edward begged to lick it but I wouldn't let him. Just sayin', I can be a lamb too.

Hit the jump for three more, including a little Fidel action.

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Oct 10 2009 Arguably The Best Haircut OF ALL TIME

This kid has what might very well be the best haircut of all time. It definitely beats the bowl cut I used to rock as a kid. Also, I had a rat-tail. Which, I'm not ashamed to admit, my mom still has saved in an envelope somewhere (not even kidding). What?! Don't even act like your parents don't still have all your baby teeth!

My Hair is Batman, Your Argument is Invalid. [geekstir]

Thanks to cody, who didn't have hair until he was two and then only on his back. Tough break, kid. There's always the carnival.

Sep 21 2009 Reptilian Crime Fighters: Spiderman Lizards

Apparently Spiderman fans are getting their radioactive panties in a bunch over Agamas, lizards with a coloration that resembles that of the superhero. Best reason ever to get a pet? Probably not.

The vivid red-and-blue colouring is almost uncannily like that of the Marvel superhero, and comic book fans have been flocking to exotic pet shops to snap them up.

Native to Kenya, the rock agama (Agama mwanzae) is unable to throw webs, but can change colour - the brightly coloured males will change brown at night or if frightened. They can also run on their hind legs, and - like Spidey - can scale vertical walls.

As many of you may know, I was an amateur herpetologist in a past life. So I like lizards. BUT NOT TROUSER SNAKES! Not speaking of which, did I ever tell you about the time I put a poison dart frog in my mouth? Because that was the end of that life. The time after I tried stealing a grizzly bear's cub!

Hit the jump for another shot of the red and blue bastard.

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Sep 2 2009 He's A Little Clingy: Spiderman Backpack

This $45 backpack carries a reasonable amount of stuff and makes it look like you're giving miniature Spiderman a piggyback ride. Or, if you're a real pervert like tipster Ste, like he's trying to get his spidey senses tingling from behind. Which, eeew -- that stuff that comes out of his hands is bad enough. I jest, you know I love it when you spray me with that shit, Spidey!

Product Site
via
Spider-Man Backpack [likecool]

Thanks to Ste and naas, who both got their Wonder Woman backpacks taken away for improper treatment.

Aug 31 2009 Disney To Acquire Marvel For $4 Billion

Mickey Mouse, in a power move to impress his ratty love interest Minnie, has decided to buy up Marvel Comics for a staggering $4 billion. With the sale come all the right's to Marvel's cache of over 5,000 characters. FIVE THOUSAND!

We believe that adding Marvel to Disney's unique portfolio of brands provides significant opportunities for long-term growth and value creation," Disney president and chief executive Robert Iger said.

"We are pleased to bring this talent and these great assets to Disney."

"Disney is the perfect home for Marvel's fantastic library of characters given its proven ability to expand content creation and licensing businesses," said Marvel chief executive Ike Perlmutter.

I mean, way to go and all, Disney, but this was a pretty foolish business decision if you ask me. What in the hell are you gonna do with 5,000 Marvel characters? You should have just bought the 30 cool ones.

Disney to buy Marvel in $4bn deal [bbcnews]

Thanks to Reverend Faux, Lomig, Jason, Aaron, Lauren, Cade, A Girl Named Michael, draw and jawn, who have all puked on different Disney rides, including It's A Small World (it was Jason!).

Aug 13 2009 Batman Would Be Proud Cramped: Guy Builds Mini-Tumbler Out Of Go Kart

Want your own Batman Tumbler but can't afford to hire Morgan Freeman to build you a full-size one? Well fear not, intrepid crime fighter, because some guy on eBay is selling $30 plans to build one out of a go kart. Of course, if you don't want to pay, I'll tell you how to make one for free.

Step 1: Steal a go kart.
Step 2: Add a bunch of spray painted sheet metal.
Step C: Multiply your chances of getting tetanus and lockjaw by four score.
Step 4: Subtract any street cred you may have accumulated over the years.
Step 5: Divide by Robin. And by divide by I mean have intercourse with in the back.
Step 6: Safety first -- make sure to wrap your junk in a costume (I guess this should have been Step 5).
Step G: Get tested.

Hit the jump for a video of a finished Dangermobile in action.

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Jul 28 2009 Marvel Superheroes Getting Anime Treatment

Not to be outdone by Master Chief, both Iron Man and Wolverine are getting the anime treatment courtesy of Madhouse Studios and Marvel Entertainment. Allegedly, two more superheroes will follow. This is the teaser for Iron Man, Wolverine is behind the cut. Get it, behind the cut? Because of his claws!

Hit it for Wolverine, which was much weirder.

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Jul 25 2009 Way To Blow Your Cover: Batman Cufflinks

Listen, I know you're classy -- but are you BATMAN CUFFLINKS CLASSY? I think you are, and I'm not just saying that to get in your tux. These cufflinks are made by Etsy seller finkstudio and will set you back a cool (or crumpled -- BUT NOT ROLLED UP) Jackson ($20). Coupled with a 3-Keyboard Cat Moon t-shirt (just tape the links to your wrists), you will enter an all new world of magical magic -- where wizards and mermaids coexist and you are your own boss. Yes, a world where you can still get laid with cufflinks taped to your hands. I've been there. I've seen it.

Hit the jump for some of the other cufflinks available, including Transformers and Spiderman.

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Jul 7 2009 YOU SLEPT WITH WHO?: X-Men Universe Relationship Map

I know, it looks like a really badass flowchart, but it's not, it's a relationship map for all the characters in the X-Men universe. Giant full-res version HERE. You know, I had forgotten Domino was involved with that man-whore Wolverine. Now I need to get tested.

X-Men Universe Relationship Map [uncannyxmen]

Thanks to Nick and Julian, who have had so many superhero women they can barely count them on one stump.

Jun 29 2009 Sadness: Superheroes, The Golden Years

This is a little gallery of superheroes past their prime. They were all drawn by Italian artist Donald Soffritti and made me sadder than hell. You know, because they got me thinking about growing old and shit. Too profound for you? I'm deeper than an ocean trench.

Hit the jump for some of my favorites, then the link for a whole bunch more.

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Jun 16 2009 Death Is No Match For Captain America

That's right folks, like a phoenix rising from the ashes of a burnt comic, the original Captain America is coming back for more ass-kicking action.

"REBORN is the next chapter in the larger story that I've been building in [CAPTAIN AMERICA] since issue #1," explains the writer, who launched this current volume in 2004. "This is a chance to really explore how things have changed in the years since Steve's death and really delve deep into who Steve Rogers is and why he became Captain America. It's a really a [story] with two or three different plotlines that all intertwine, which is a lot of fun and allows us to have [both] in-your-face action and quiet character moments."

"We've been planning the story of Cap's return virtually from the moment that he died"

Wow, does nobody stay dead anymore? I mean, Jesus. Seriously, you started this.

Reborn Revealed [marvel] (click for a much more detailed look at the series)

Thanks to FDSY, who plans to zombie it up himself someday.

May 30 2009 Own Your Very Own (Miniature) Bat Signal

Want your own miniature bat signal? Now's your chance -- a limited edition of 500 are being sold for $260 from Entertainment Earth.

The miniature replica Bat-Signal features a sturdy metal construction and stands about 12-inches tall. It's got a built-in cooling fan and can be swiveled and tilted to give you the best shot at making contact with the Dark Knight. Of course, since the light can only project the Bat symbol about 16-feet, don't expect him to show, unless he happens to live in your bedroom closet.

Now I'm not saying you should cut a bat out of black contact paper and slap it on a pre-existing lamp, but, I mean, recession. $4 bat signal: 1, $260 bat signal: 3. Wait a minute -- 3? Damn you, style points!

desktop bat-signal hails bugs not bats [technabob]

May 11 2009 Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat: Spiderman Fail

This is a video of Spiderman hurting himself in front of a bunch of children and being played off by a cat on a keyboard. Trust me, it'll all make sense after you watch it. Just kidding, it won't ever make sense. But it will always make awesome.

Youtube

Thanks to Joemo, who once found Spiderman trapped in his own web and furiously pleasuring himself to a daddy longlegs.

May 6 2009 Reader Makes Periodic Table Of Superheroics

Geekologie Reader Mike took the time to make an awesome periodic table of superheroics. This is it. The picture is small though so click HERE to see the full, high-res version. Also, there's an alphabetical key provided after the jump, in case you can't figure out who some of them are. I dig it, Mike, but would it have killed you to include The Geekologie Writer for Ge? Just saying, one time I blogged from my roommate's closet while he had sex with his girlfriend and I screeched like a Pterodactyl the whole time. Does that make me the most super hero ever? Yes.

Hit the jump for the key.

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May 5 2009 Superfailure Personal Ads: Consortium Of Evil Seeks Shadowhare's True Identity

That's right, "E" from the Cincinnati-based Consortium of Evil, put up a Craigslist ad seeking Shadowhare's true identity in order to put a stop to the do-gooder and his ragtag bag of spandex-laden friends. Plus, he's offering a hefty $10 reward. Which, even though I promised Shadowhare I wouldn't betray him, is too good to pass up. So, "E":

Shadowhare is -- are you sure you're ready for this? And I will get a $10 bill and not like 40 quarters, right? Okay, Shadowhare is -- can I get you a glass of water or something? No, I'm not stalling, of course I know who he is. I'm just trying to build suspense. Fine. Shadowhare is....a dork. BOOM -- Hamilton me, bitch!

Craigslist

Thanks to egleaves -- OR SHOULD I CALL YOU "E" FROM THE CONSORTIUM OF EVIL!?! egleaves? Okay.

May 5 2009 Guy Make Fully Functional Wolverine Claws

Not to be outdone by the Tomahawk Skull Gauntlet, some guy went and made his own fully functional Wolverine claws out of a bunch of copper tubing and sharp metal. They're surprisingly impressive and make pretty short work out of a cardboard box. Which, I think we can all agree, is humanity's real enemy. *SNIKT* Die, tree-zombie!

Hit the jump for a longer video of the assembly and dude giving them the ol' block of Styrofoam test (starting around 3:00).

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May 1 2009 Cincinnati Has Its Own Superheroes, Both Super And Hero Debatable (Can I Join?)

Finally, Cincinnati has it's own superheros. Shadow Hare, a 21-year old masked vigilante, prowls the streets while leading a ragtag bag of other assholes crimefighters known as The Allegiance of Heroes (MUST SEE hero pep rally at 1:07). And, apparently, this isn't a unique phenomenon -- there's actually a World Superhero Registry (ANOTHER MUST SEE), showcasing all the real-life heroes operating around the globe. Which, after viewing, has inspired me to start my own group of crimefighters (now accepting applications). I'm thinking 'GW and the Nut-Busting Crusaders Of Truth And Cool Costumes'. Too professional?

Hit the jump for parts 2 and 3 of the news story about Shadow Hare. Trust me, best way to spend your Friday afternoon. ALLEGIANCE ASSEMBLE!

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Apr 22 2009 Pet Cosplay Festival In Rio de Janeiro

Live near Rio de Janeiro (Brazil)? Do you like pets? Do you like pets dressed up as characters from comic books, video games, movies and cartoons? If so, you're in luck -- there's a pet cosplay festival this Sunday, April 26th! Per the Bablefishily translated page:

The event starts to the 9 Hours and is especially come back advantages fans of livens up and cachorros. E since the 20 better fancies will be awardees, capriche creativity. Valley everything: of Wolverine and Super Man, until Torch Human being (Or Canine Torch).

Beyond everything, if you to want to adopt one cãozinho, Ong ANIDA, through the campaign "Devoid Snout", will go to adopt and to receive donations for the abandoned animals from the city, of which it takes care of.

Sounds like a good time. And for a good cause too. So if you're in the area feel free to check it out and take some pictures. If they're not too blurry (and, quite frankly, even if they are) I'll post them so everyone can 'ooooh' and 'awwwwh' and 'that's so cruel' in harmony. Then we'll record an album and make millions.

Pet Cosplay, Rio de Janeiro [combustao]

Thanks to loyal Brazilian tipster Romeo, who may or may not attend the festival depending on whether his dog is out fighting crime that morning or not.