Nov 18 2009 Dad Only Speaks Klingon To Son For 3 Years
This handsome dapper portly half-Santa isn't the man in the story, but that doesn't matter. What's important is that he practices good dental hygiene. Also, that some cat named d'Armond Speers decided to only speak Klingon to his son for the first three years of his life. But fret not, he did it with good cause: cruelty experimentation. I knew I had kids for a reason!
"I was interested in the question of whether my son, going through his first language acquisition process, would acquire it like any human language," Speers told the Minnesota Daily. "He was definitely starting to learn it."
And get this, Speers says he isn't really a huge Star Trek fan.Does the fact that Speers has a doctorate in computational linguistics explain anything -- or excuse anything -- here? Maybe. His child-rearing habits were part of a larger story on the company he advises, Ultralingua, which develops language and translation software. Including Klingon.
Yeah, I don't know how I feel about that. Besides somebody get this man a 'Father of the Year' ribbon! Are you reading this B.F. Skinner? That air-crib was weak shit!
Local dad spoke only Klingon to child for three years [citypages]
Thanks to Demon Spawn and Kelly, who are only speaking jibberish to their children for six years.
Nov 18 2009 R2-D2 Finally Spotted In New Star Trek Movie
Remember how you heard J.J. Abrams snuck R2-D2 somewhere in the new Star Trek movie? And remember how you kept going back to the theater with the hopes of spotting him? God, you need a hobby. I dunno, World of Warcraft or something. Anyway, thanks to the recent release of the film and newfangled slow-motion technology, the droid has been spotted.
The blog Gizmodo has located the brave droid's appearance, and frankly, it's no surprise that 99.999% of the world couldn't spot the "Star Wars" star. R2-D2 appears for about one microsecond during a battle scene. Floating across the screen from left to right, the droid appears to be enjoying himself, however briefly.
Well, there he is. Finally, we can all sleep at night. Together, in a big pile like in Where The Wild Things Are the one time they're all happy before Max proceeds to eff everything up. And speaking of which: you run away from my home and guess what -- there isn't going to be any chocolate cake waiting for you when you get back. There's gonna be a locked door. And maybe a belt so you can whip yourself if you're lucky.
Confirmed: R2-D2 Finally Discovered In Star Trek [gizmodo]
via
Found: R2-D2 in 'Star Trek' [yahoomovies]
Thanks to jessica, Matty and Lunarion, who spotted him the first time but didn't want to say anything because they didn't want to ruin it for the rest of you. Plus, they make great friends because they can keep secrets.
Oct 27 2009 Clever, Very Clever: Three Worf Moon T-Shirt
Well there's the original three wolf moon t-shirt, a three keyboard cat moon t-shirt, and a three Teen Wolf moon t-shirt, so why not a three Worf moon t-shirt? I have no idea if these are actually for sale, but send me $25 and a blank t-shirt and I'll see if I can't iron one on for you. Sadly, I won't be able to.
Thanks to Blastphemer and Riker, who don't have to wear shirts because they're so hairy. Gross.
Oct 18 2009 Okay: Man Raps Eminem Songs In Klingon
This is a video of German rapper Klenginem covering Eminem's 'Without Me' in the Klingon language. Apparently this guy actually dresses up and plays gigs doing this. And, honestly, I'm not surprised, Germans are weird as shit. Videos. Case closed!
Klenginem: Eminem Meets Klingon [poppedculture]
Thanks to Matthew, Chrissy and dan, who, from the quality of their emails, don't even know one language. Kidding (but not really)!
Oct 13 2009 Pack Me Up, Scottie: An Enterprise Bong
This is a cheap plastic bong made to resemble the USS Enterprise. Personally, I wouldn't be caught dead smoking out of it BECAUSE OD'ING ON WEED IS PRACTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. Trust me, I've tried scientists told me.
*Geekologie does not endorse the use of illegal substances, as they may make you retarded. Ha, good point -- even MORE retarded.
To Boldly Toke Where No-One Has Toked Before [io9]
Thanks to Wilson, who claims he's hit the USS Enterpuffs before and said it was out of this world. Like the moon!
Oct 2 2009 Star Trek The Next Generation: Wesley Crusher Finally Gets What He Deserves
This is a fan edited video of the hateable ensign Wesley Crusher finally meeting his doom. I thought it was pretty cute. Cause, to tell ya the truth, I never really liked that guy. Something about him always rubbed me the wrong way -- like another man's penis on the side of my leg. Just sayin', it happens!
Thanks to Paul, who would have just tasered that bitch and pushed him out an airlock.
Aug 27 2009 Sure He's Happy?: Enterprise Dog Costume
This is a custom canine USS Enterprise costume made out of cardboard and Bud Light cans. And I have to admit, Bud Light was a smart choice because of its superior drinkability. I'm serious, those things are so drinkable one time I guzzled a whole cooler full of them. There must have been at least 20. This was like an hour ago. Then I started cutting up this box and....holy shit that's my dog!
This dog goes where no dog has gone before [scifiwire]
Thanks to FDSY who made a Millennium Falcon costume for his cat but the cat ran away.
Jul 19 2009 eBay: Piece Of Film From Original Star Trek
Want to own a piece of Star Trek that you can wear around the house like a boa? Then you're in luck, because a man is selling an 11-foot piece of film from the "Mirror, Mirror" episode of the original Star Trek series.
This is a unique, one-of-a-kind item. I was an assistant film editor on the original series of Star Trek and this is an original section of film that came right out of the camera after shooting. This is from the episode "Mirror, Mirror" which aired October 6, 1967. The clipping is 11 feet 7 frames long, about 183 frames total. Pictured on the film is Chekov (Walter Koenig) when he is foiled in his attempt to kill Captain Kirk. The clip follows the fight sequence and includes two different phaser blasts which were hand scribed by me back in 1969.
Starting bid is $500, and I wouldn't be surprised if this ended up selling for a pretty penny. Or a handsome quarter. You hear that? Better luck next time you busted ass nickel!
Thanks to Sigrid, who doesn't need a phaser to know how to rock pew.
Jun 18 2009 Chart: Why Star Trek Is So Cool Right Now
This is a cake chart explaining why the Star Trek franchise is so fashionably hip right now. Although I guess it's more specifically referring to the new movie, which, SPOILER ALERT: I got kicked out of. Twice.
Top 10 reasons why Star Trek is suddenly cool--plus the chart that proves it! [scifiwire] (click this for longer explanations of each reason)
Jun 17 2009 Gallery: Out Of This World Star Trek Cakes
We've already seen a little Star Trek cake action here on Geekologie, but, quite frankly Captain, that wasn't enough. So I'm beaming some more of those delicious bastards right up. Hit the jump to see them all, then the warp drive button. I SAID WARP DRIVE, DUMMY, THAT WAS SELF DESTRUCT! Quickly, to an escape pod! Haha, finally -- I didn't think we were ever get rid of that guy. Not you though, you're awesome.
Hit the jump for a bunch more.
Continue Reading " Gallery: Out Of This World Star Trek Cakes "
Jun 11 2009 Star Trek Communicator App For iPhone
Want a realistic Star Trek communicator app for your iPhone? You're in luck, dog.
This classic Star Trek communicator app for iPhone slipped past us when it was first released into the App Store at the end of May. The spot on graphics and familiar chirping sound triggered when performing the epic cover-flip to access the communicator's controls is pure goodness.
This app is dangerously authentic and it's actually useful too. Unfortunately the developers had to name it "Star Radio Communicator" ($.99) in order to keep Paramount from sniffing out their brilliant effort.
*BEEP BOOP chirpity chirp chirp* Geekologie Writer, come in -- this is your captain speaking. What do you say you and I go investigate planet Dinosauria and score some sweet tail? "Captain, I've already been beamed."
UPDATE: App was purchased by several Geekologie Readers who attest the thing is a monster piece of shit and doesn't sound right at all. Save your buck.
Star Trek Communicator for iPhone Is Spot On [iphonesavior]
Thanks to Michael, who boob beep chirpity chirps all the ladies. And to Dan, Aaron and konstance for each pissing away $1 to find out it sucks the balls.
Jun 10 2009 I'd Have Never Missed An Episode: What If The Enterprise Was Run By Sexy Ladies?
This is a moderately NSFW video showing what life would be like on the Enterprise if it was partially run by scantily clad womens. Although truthfully, Deanna Troi was more than enough sexy lady/Betazoid hybrid for me. Yow yow! And how about when she and Worf were getting it on? Geekologie Writer's Log, Stardate 47988.0: Double boner.
Thanks to darkfall13, who was all about some Beverly Crusher.
Jun 5 2009 Gallery: Sexy Star Trek and Star Wars Corsets
It's Friday, and, since I love you all, how about some sexy Star Trek and Star Wars themed corsets made by Etsy seller Evening Arwen? The Star Trek corsets go for $200 a pop and the Star Wars models (which include the rest of the costumes, but not the actual women), are $500 (trooper) and $600 (Vader). So hit the jump to see them and get all beep boop and blah blah blah is anybody still reading this? No? Okay good. I SAID HIT THE JUMP ALREADY.
Hit the jump. Do it now!
Continue Reading " Gallery: Sexy Star Trek and Star Wars Corsets "
May 26 2009 Highly Questionable: Retro Star Trek Drawls
It's not dreaming about Spock staring at you in your skivvies with a quizzical smirk that bothers me, it's the fact that somebody might actually pay $75 for 34-year old USED underwear. What is this, Japan? Kidding -- you know I love you Japan!
Thanks darkfall13, and to answer your question: frightening.
May 18 2009 It's On eBay: Your Own 'Show Used' Tribble
Want your very own Tribble from the original Star Trek series? Well you're in luck, thanks to a $5,000 eBay auction behind held by the son of Scotty (James Doohan).
This rare, large, walking Tribble is one of only 6 ever made and was used on the 1967 original Star Trek episode, "The Trouble with Tribbles" . Not only is this Tribble in great condition after 42 years, it actually works/walks. One of these Tribbles is on display at the Science Fiction Museum in Seattle and is owned by Paul Allen.
Nice. Alternatively, vacuum the carpet and then glue your sweepings to a Styrofoam ball. BOOM, Tribbles on the cheap. Join me next week when I explain how to make a Klingon out of a cadaver and model railroad mountain.
Hit the jump for several more shots.
Continue Reading " It's On eBay: Your Own 'Show Used' Tribble "
May 10 2009 PEW PEW: Death Star Versus The Enterprise
Guess who wins. Here, I'll even give you a hint: not Endor. Ha, what do you mean it says 'Death Star Destroys Enterprise' right on the video? Well, you can't go around believing everything you hear. Did I say hear? I meant read. IT'S A TRAP!
Thanks to Evan, Antoekneeoh, Chris, who once barbecued an Ewok. It smelled like burnt fur. And to JC, who still ate some.
May 8 2009 Star Trek Band Warp 11 Releases New Album
Just in time for the new movie, Star Trek band Warp 11 has released a new album entitled "I Don't Want to Go to Heaven as Long as They have Vulcans in Hell". It includes such sure to be classics as: Jim Beam Me Up, Betazoid Mind F%%k, Beam into Me, They Put Creatures in Our Bodies, Suds Me Up Sulu (Mirror Mirror), and What Would William Shatner Do? This is the promo video for said album. And, if you can get past the two dudes in the heart-shaped tub, the music is actually pretty good. Unfortunately, it's hard to get past the two guys in the bathub, so skip to 0:20.
BWHAHAHAHA, did I say I say 0:20 -- I meant 0:45. Suckers!
Thanks to Ryan and Steve, who once pushed their bikes up the steepest hill they could find and then rode them down at Warp 12. And to Karl, the man in the tub himself.
May 8 2009 Hustler Makes Star Trek Themed Adult Film
Star Trek porn is nothing new (SO I'VE HEARD) but Hustler is aiming to take the cake with their latest Star Trek themed adult video, 'This Ain't Star Trek XXX' (weak title). This is the trailer for the it, which drops May 12th. Feel free to watch it at work -- it doesn't show anything bad. Then hit the jump for a blooper outtake from the video, which is safe as well. So, what do you think -- summer blockbuster or summer nutbuster? I'm going with neither.
Hit it for the blooper.
Continue Reading " Hustler Makes Star Trek Themed Adult Film "
May 7 2009 Spock: Upside Down And Looking Spool-y
Deborah Sperber made this rendering of everyone's favorite elf (sacrilege!), Spock, using 1,102 spools of colored thread. But to view Spock's visage properly, one must gaze into a crystal viewing ball while rubbing it and repeating "I love The Geekologie Writer" three times. Then, I will leap out of the piece, shirtless atop my snow-white unicorn. You will squeal with delight and rush towards me with open arms. Unfortunately, this will spook my mount, which will gore you upon its crystalline horn. I will not touch your dead boob.
Spock Spools [ibored]
Thanks to Mike, who knows quality romance when he reads it.
Apr 29 2009 3D Chess Adds Dimension To The Game
Tired of playing plain old chess? 3-way chess just not cutting it for you anymore? How about some 3-D chess? What rolls down stairs, alone or in pairs, rolls over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack, and fits on your back, It's 3D CHESS CHESS CHESS! Ooooh snap -- you just got Ren and Stimpy'd! Anyways, this 3D chessboard was designed by Ji Lee and bears an unstriking resemblance to Star Trek Tri-Dimensional Chess. Truthfully, I never even know the rules for chess*, I just like playing with the pieces. Haha -- my castle just stomped one of your guys with the hat! Now it's gonna....WHAT'S YOUR HORSEY DOING ON MY QUEEN?!?
3D Chessboard Is Like Q*bert for Smart People [gizmodo]
*I was kidding for the sake of the article, I'm actually a Grand Dungeon Master.
