Oct 16 2009 Coool!: Earth And Jupiter In The Same Photo

This is an amazing photograph of the earth (and moon) and Jupiter (and a few of its moons) in the same frame. Now I know what you're thinking, and no, God didn't take this one.

Sometimes the planets line up in such a way that you can see Earth and Jupiter in the same wide-angle shot. That is, if you were aboard the Mars Global Surveyor on May 22, 2003. When the Mars Orbiter Camera snapped this unique view, Earth was 86 million miles away, and Jupiter was 600 million miles away.

Wow, that really gets you thinking, doesn't it? Like about how far objects in space are from one another. Really far. And speaking of which -- will one of you be so kind as to walk the remote over here?

Hit the jump to see a diagram explaining how the planets were aligned.

Continue Reading " Coool!: Earth And Jupiter In The Same Photo "

Oct 7 2009 New Giant Ring Discovered Around Saturn

Because space is awesome and full of mysteries (and butt-naked aliens), scientists just recently discovered a freaking huge new ice-and-dust ring around Saturn. I want it for engagement!

Although the ring dust is very cold -- minus 316 degrees Fahrenheit -- it shines with thermal radiation.

No one had looked at its location with an infrared instrument until now, Clavin said.

The bulk of the ring material starts about 3.7 million miles from the planet and extends outward about another 7.4 million miles.

The newly found ring is so huge it would take 1 billion Earths to fill it, JPL said.

1 billion earths -- that's a lot! Not as many as you could fit in my stomach, but I've been expanding it with balloons. I'm gonna be a drug mule!

NASA telescope discovers giant ring around Saturn [comcastnews]

Thanks to Calabasa209, who has been to space and knows things. Things you wouldn't even believe. I'm talking wormhole shit. Makes great fertilizer!

Sep 16 2009 We're Saved!: Astronomers Discover Solid Planet Outside Of Our Solar System

Unfortunately, it's solid lava and has a daytime temperature of 3,600 degrees Fahrenheit. Still, I'd live there. With Satan. You hear that, my fiery little bitch? I SAID LIGHT THE GRILL.

As scientists search the skies for life elsewhere, they have found more than 300 planets outside our solar system. But they all have been gas balls or can't be proven to be solid. Now a team of European astronomers has confirmed the first rocky extrasolar planet.

The planet is called Corot-7b. It was first discovered earlier this year. European scientists then watched it dozens of times to measure its density to prove that it is rocky like Earth. It's in our general neighborhood, circling a star in the winter sky about 500 light-years away. Each light-year is about 6 trillion miles.

Well folks, it's been real. But I think it's time for your Geekologie Writer to hit the big red 'BLAST-OFF' button and shoot himself to Corot-7b. And like that saying goes, "Shoot for the moon. Even if you make it, your dad will still call you a failure."

Found: Firm place to stand outside solar system [yahoonews]

Aug 13 2009 Why Not?: Send A Text Message To Aliens

HelloFromEarth.net is a website where you can submit text messages to be broadcast to Gliese 581d, a planet 20-light years away that may or may not support life (but 100% does). You have until the 24th of the month to submit your texts. Aaaaaaand here are some awful examples of why the aliens are gonna come kill us all.

Come here and take me with us. Here everyone is crazy.

Ever heard of Jesus? He's pretty awesome. Yay space travel!

... hi....... hehehehehhehehehehee (runs off giggling like a little school girl at lunch over a cute boy)

Of course, not everyone can be an idiot moron, so thankfully there were a couple people who actually know how to talk to aliens.

You are cordially invited to an Interplanetary BBQ. 6.00pm, 4th October, 2452 at my place BYO Meat and Beer. RSVP: Year 2100 Cheers

Junjun, I love you forever. Although we are different and our love is not accepted by others,I cant stop loving you.I want to share my dream with you forever.

Hell yeah, Junjun, get you some! Share that dream. Share it ALL. NIGHT. LONG.

HelloFromEarth

Thanks to Katie and Harsh, who accidentally sexted the aliens. Nice going, guys (forward them to me).

May 11 2009 Another Day, Another Cosmic Eyeball

We've already seen God's hand, God's eye and the Eye of Sauron, so why not another cosmic ball of eye? This here is the latest in a batch of images from the Hubble Space Bubblescope of planetary nebula Knockout 4-55. Enter Punch-Out tie-in here. I AM THE L337 BLOGGAR!

Planetary nebulas have nothing to do with planets. They were named so because in early telescopes, they had the fuzzy look of planets in our outer solar system. In fact planetary nebulas sit throughout our galaxy. This one contains the outer layers of a red giant star that were expelled into interstellar space when the star was in the late stages of its life.

Ultraviolet radiation emitted from the remaining hot core of the star ionizes the ejected gas shells, causing them to glow.

In the specific case of K 4-55, a bright inner ring is surrounded by a bipolar structure. The entire system is then surrounded by a faint red halo, seen in the emission by nitrogen gas. This multi-shell structure is fairly uncommon in planetary nebulae.

BOOM, YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WAS GETTING ASTRONOMY LESSONED! Now, for your astrology lesson: it's all bullshit. Also, you will make decisions soon. NO I AM NOT HIGH. Tell me, if eyes are the windows to one's soul, is a cosmic eye THE WINDOW TO ANOTHER DIMENSION?! And, if so, is there a dinosaur park there? ZOMG -- quick, tie me to a rocket engine!

Hubble Photographs Giant Eye in Space [yahoonews]

Thanks to Watch-303, who may or may not be operating out of Boulder/Denver region.

May 1 2009 Sure, Why Not?: Growing Plants On The Moon

Paragon Space Development Corporation, a NASA subcontractor, has decided to take a stab at growing plants in a specially designed greenhouse on the moon. THE MOON! The attempt will take place in 2012, so we may or may not get to see if it works before the world ends.

In order to successfully grow a plant on the moon, Paragon has developed a very specialized greenhouse that can safely contain a plant and provide it with all elements it needs to survive. The greenhouse will need to protect the plant from the sun's intense rays while providing it with enough water, balanced soil, and carbon dioxide while removing its waste oxygen.

Paragon has chosen a species within Brassica (the mustard family), due to their quick growth and the abundance of knowledge about the plant. A typical Brassica needs 14 days of light in order to grow, flower and then set seed. A lunar day is 14 Earth days long, so if the landing is timed perfectly, it will allow just enough time for the plant to grow to maturity and possibly re-seed.

Nice, but you really think anyone cares about growing mustard on the moon? No, I'm convinced there's a much more diabolical motive behind this experiment. Namely, government space weed.

First Gardens on the Moon by 2012! [inhabitat]

Thanks to Chuck Nunchuck and toast king, who once got high on Mars and thought they saw an alien. It was a rock.

Apr 26 2009 3...2...1...: Largest Model Rocket Blasts Off

Remember the world's largest model rocket? Yeah, well it blasted off yesterday without a hitch (or Space Bat). This is a picture of the 36-foot tall, 1,600lb beast about to take to the skies. There's a couple more pictures and a video of the launch after the jump, so be sure to check that out. But not my girlfriend, or I'll punch you in the eyes.

Hit the launch button for the rest.

Continue Reading " 3...2...1...: Largest Model Rocket Blasts Off "

Apr 20 2009 Stephen Hawking Battling Infection, 'Very Ill'

Stephen Hawking, genius extraordinaire and a personal hero of mine (I heard he once piloted his wheelchair through a blackhole unscathed), has been hospitalized and is reportedly "very ill".

[Cambridge University] said Hawking has been fighting a chest infection for several weeks, and was being treated at Addenbrooke's Hospital in Cambridge, the university city north of London.

"Professor Hawking is very ill," said Gregory Hayman, the university's head of communications. "He is undergoing tests. He has been unwell for a couple of weeks."

Geekologie wishes Stephen a speedy recovery. No, a lightspeedy recovery. Get well soon, Dr. Hawking.

Stephen Hawking hospitalized, reported very ill [yahoonews]

Apr 14 2009 'God's Hand' Spotted Using Space Telescope

That's right, son, spotted for the first time since like the year -5 billion: God's hand!

The image, taken by NASA's space-based Chandra Observatory telescope, shows an X-ray nebula 150 light years across.

NASA says the display is caused by a young and powerful pulsar, known by the rather prosaic name of PSR B1509-58.The finger-like structures are apparently caused by "energizing knots of material in a neighboring gas cloud," NASA says.

DAAAAMN! But seriously, God, you might want to have that pinky looked at.

NASA photos show giant cosmic hand [cnn]

Thanks e., I would walk 150 light years, and I would walk 150 more, just to be the man who walked 300 light years to fall down at your door.

Mar 21 2009 Astronaut To Test New Non-Stink Underwear

That's right, Japanese astronaut Koichi Wakata is slated to test a new kind of underwear during his current visit to the space station. The "state-of-the-art" undies were designed "to reduce the smells in normal clothing, absorb sweat and provide insulation."

The underwear, developed by Japanese researchers, are made of antibacterial polymers and are fire-resistant.

Astronauts normally change their clothes every three days.

Koichi will attempt to wear the underwear for a full seven days. Which, if successful, will only be 9 days short of my record. And, if you think I'm kidding, ask my dry cleaners. Well, my ex dry cleaners. I am so stinky!

Astronaut tests non-smelly super pants in space [metro]

Thanks to Thumperchica, who doesn't care because she doesn't wear underwear. I'm with you, girl -- high five! No? Helicopter!

Mar 7 2009 Japanese Astronaut To Perform Highly Questionable Space Experiments

A Japanese astronaut is set to perform a number of worthless experiments this month while aboard the International Space Station in an attempt to piss off taxpayers and win over schoolchildren.

Koichi Wakata will perform 16 tasks chosen from 1,597 suggested by hundreds of people, from nursery school pupils to a 90-year-old man, said the official at the Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA).

Wakata will try "a magic carpet that floats in the air" after he reaches the Japanese laboratory Kibo (Hope) at the International Space Station (ISS) later in March for a stay of more than three months, said a JAXA report.

Wakata will also attempt to fold clothes, do push-ups and backflips, arm-wrestle another astronaut and "shoot liquid out of the straw of a drink container to see what happens", said the space agency.

Wow, that sounds....boring. How about you actually perform a few of the experiments I suggested, JAXA? For example: is getting drunk in space as awesome as I imagine? And, if so, is it easy to clean up puke? Lastly, are morbidly-obese people REALLY weightless in space? Because last summer I rode a centrifuge at the county fair and this one fat lady kept sliding down the wall.

Japan astronaut to try flying carpet in space lab: official [physorg]

Thanks to Fred, who wants to know if free-dried ice cream is complimentary for astronauts or if you have to pay for it like at Space Camp.

Mar 5 2009 Docking: What The Hell Did I Just Watch?

I really have no idea what I just watched but it reminded me of Monty Python's Flying Circus. Also, I think it carried a powerful message. One about doing it. In space.

Docking [vimeo]

Thanks to C, who has actually done it in space and always tells me the story and it makes me so jealous.

Feb 12 2009 The Universe Is Apparently A Big Metal Donut

And all along I thought was a little plastic danish. Shows you how much I know (read: everything). So yeah, ghost of Karl Sagan: I know you're reading this, feel free to chime in and back me up whenever you want.

At first, this polished object looks like an ordinary ring. But it's much more than that. This is a model of the universe, which, according to one increasingly popular theory, is not flat, circular, spherical or saddle-shaped, but more like a "3-torus," or doughnut shape. It's also a whole lot bigger then you may have imagined.

Look closer, and you'll notice a minuscule speck on this model. It looks like a tiny flaw at first, but upon closer inspection, you'll see it's a precise wine glass shape. That's us. The tiny area depicts the known universe, showing a timeline of its entire life, from the Big Bang starting at the glass's stem, expanding to where we live today.

I get it -- so what they're saying is that the known universe is a wine lover. So do you think it's a Merlot fan or more of a Chardonnay kind of universe? Mad Dog 20/20, huh? Awh yeah, I knew I was living here for good reason! Now stop hogging the bottle, Universe, Jesus you're a boozehound.

Mind-boggling model of the doughnut-shaped universe makes you feel really small [dvice]

Jan 12 2009 Massive Stargate SG-1 LEGO Ship On eBay

You a Stargate SG-1 fan? Want a LEGO replica of the Asgard Beliskner Battle Ship? Got $3,500? Live in or around Highland Park, Illinois? Willing to drive there? If so you're in luck because eBay user fentonhardy is selling the ship of your dreams!

AFTER THREE MONTHS OF HARD WORK AND TENS OF THOUSANDS OF PIECES MY BELISKNER IS FINALLY FINISHED. FANS OF THE SHOW KNOW THAT THE BELISKNER WAS THE FLAGSHIP OF THE ASGARD FLEET IN STARGATE SG-1 UNTIL IT BURNED UP IN EARTH'S ATMOSPHERE. AFTER WATCHING THE SERIES I KNEW THAT I HAD TO BUILD THE SHIP OUT OF LEGOS, THE THE RESULT WAS A INCREDIBLY LARGE AND DETAILED SHIP THAT MEASURED FIVE FEET LONG, SIX FEET WIDE, AND TWO FEET HIGH.

DUE TO THE ENORMOUS SIZE OF THIS SHIP IT IS PICK UP ONLY

My god that guy loves to yell. Tens of thousands of pieces though -- that's a lot. But not as many as hundreds of thousands of pieces, am I right? Damn right I am. Math: I know that shit. And also, poetry. Here comes a haiku!

Massive Stargate ship

Makes my penis look tiny
I won't stand by it

Damn, you just got poetried, son!

Hit the jump for several more shots and a link to the auction with a whole bunch more.

Continue Reading " Massive Stargate SG-1 LEGO Ship On eBay "

Jan 8 2009 New Space Toilet Ready To Drop (!) In 2014

The Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) believe they've solved the age-old problem of how to shit in space.

The current ISS toilet is a Russian-built, western-style commode that sucks waste away like a vacuum cleaner. Use of that toilet requires practice before heading to space, particularly because an improperly seated user has the potential to create a messy situation.

Clean and easy to use, the envisioned space toilet is designed to be worn like a diaper around the astronaut's waist at all times. Sensors detect when the user relieves him or herself, automatically activating a rear-mounted suction unit that draws the waste away from the body through tubes into a separate container. In addition to washing and drying the wearer after each use, the next-generation space toilet will incorporate features that eliminate unwanted sound and odor.

No offense, JAXA, but that sounds a little like overkill. Here's a much simpler and cost effective solution: shit yo pants! Then put them in a bag, and throw them out the nearest air-lock. Extra points for hitting a passing UFO.

Next-generation space toilet ready in five years [pinktentacle

Thanks to abovedefault and Praveen, who don't need vacuum-diapers because they digest everything. That's right, everything. Even gum.

Dec 8 2008 ISS Orbiting Toolbag Filmed From Earth

Remember last month when a NASA toolbag accidentally floated off into space during a repair to the International Space Station (if not, video after the jump. Skip to about 0:55 to see the loss)?

Endeavor astronaut Heidi Stefanyshyn-Piper's loss has turned out to be an amateur star gazers' event of the season. The $100,000 tool bag slipped out of her reach and floated into space while she was trying to clean up a greasy mess on the starboard section of the space station. The tool bag is now dubbed ISS Toolbag and is orbiting the Earth. According to Space.com, Edward Light spotted the orbiting tool bag using 10 x 50 binoculars from his backyard in Lakewood, New Jersey.

The orbiting tool bag weighs approximately 30-pounds. It measures 20-inches wide and 12-inches long. The tool bag contains two grease guns, a scraper tool, a large trash bag and a small debris bag. Given the size and dim magnitude of the orbiting tool bag, star gazers will need binoculars or a small telescope to view it.

The video above is actual footage of the bag sailing by. Go here and enter your ZIP code to find out when and were to look to see the toolbag for yourself. Alternatively, come over to my place around six when my roommate gets home.

Hit the jump for the loss video.

Continue Reading " ISS Orbiting Toolbag Filmed From Earth "

Dec 8 2008 Eye Candy: Aurora Borealis From Space

This is a time-lapse video made of still images by astronaut Don Pettit aboard the International Space Station. It shows the Aurora Borealis in all its auroral beauty -- from space. And while it's not THE most beautiful thing I've ever seen, it's second only to the boobs I saw yesterday.

Youtube

Thanks to Larry, who apologizes for saying Dan stinks but will still see him on the hike tomorrow rain or shine. Just be careful guys, and don't get f***ed by any bears.

Dec 3 2008 Out Of This World Deliciousness: Space Beer

Mmmm, space beer. It's the stuff my sci-fi fantasies are made of. Well, that, and the aquamarine breasts of alien chicks. Well now fantasy and reality collide -- with honest-to-God space beer (sort of)!

The beer will be made with barley -- to be harvested this weekend -- descended from seeds that spent five months in 2006 aboard the International Space Station.

Sapporo isn't planning to sell the special brew, at least for now, and hasn't decided how it will distribute the planned 100 bottles, Matsumura said.

So far, scientists have not found any difference between space barley and the Earth-confined version, she said.

First of all, The Geekologie Writer clearly deserves a bottle. And secondly, have you tried the new beer on tap at the Mos Eisley Cantina? It's called PEW PEW Pilsner. BWAHAHHA HAHA! Han shot first! Whew *wiping tear* God I hate myself.

Japanese brewery to make beer from space barley [heraldtribune]

Thanks to Jumpin_J and Pat, who, for the tips, can each get a sip of my space brew. Backwash.

Dec 1 2008 Meteor Fragments Found, Geekologie Writer Plans To Pilfer And Sell On eBay

Remember the meteor that PEW PEWed over Canada last week? Well a bunch of the fragments have finally been located by scientists. So what I'm going to do is grab one of the guys, beat the whereabouts of said fragments out of him, liberate the stones, and then sell those mothers on eBay for a hefty profit! It's the American way. In Canada. It's the Americanadian way!

U of C planetary scientist Dr. Alan Hildebrand and graduate student Ellen Milley announced Friday morning they located several meteorite fragments late Thursday afternoon. They believe thousands of meteorite bits are strewn over 20 square kilometers near the Battle River.

Friday afternoon, they led a group of reporters to the site -- a region called Buzzard Coulee, about 40 kilometres from Lloydminster Reporters were told those observations, combined with the physical evidence, give scientists a treasure trove of data that could give them a better understanding of the solar system.

Haha, I didn't have to beat up the scientist after all. Woops. Anyway, what is this about a better understanding of the solar system? I'll tell you everything you need to know about the solar system in three sentences: It's big. It has a bunch of shit in it, but it's all pretty spread out with lots of nothing in between. Sometimes stuff busts all up into earth's atmosphere and goes buck-ass wild in here. Seriously, just ask the dinosaurs. OH HO -- that's right, they're all dead! My God were they sexy though.

Meteorite pieces found in Saskatchewan [cbcnews]

Thanks to Larry, who made fun of me for crying during The Land Before Time. Also, Dan smells.

Nov 24 2008 $450,000 Watch Features Real Moon Dust

The DNA Moon Dust Watch from Geneva watchmaker Romain Jerome was created to commemorate the 40th anniversary of the moon landing is limited to a not-so-limited edition of 1,969 (get it, because of the year?).

'The case of the watch is made with steel melted with fragments of the Apollo 11.

'The dial and face is made from minerals that include real dust from the moon - this is a world first. The moon dust had been melted into it.

Each piece will run between $15,000 and $450,000, depending on the amount of moon dust (cheap bastards didn't even use cheese) and Apollo metal included. Some of the straps are even made from the fibers of a spaceshit! Wait, I meant suit, spacesuit. Anyway, this is a total ripoff. I bought an authentic angel dust watch from a tweaker for only $20. Whee, ants are crawling under my skin!

The watch that is out of this world: Timepiece made from moon dust will cost £300,000 [dailymail]

Thanks to Uncle Eccoli, who doesn't need a moon dust watch to know it's time to party.