Nov 4 2009 Tutorial: How To Make The Chewbacca Sound
This is a short video tutorial of some busty geek girl teaching you how to sound like Chewbacca. And I don't care how cute you think she is, watch her from 1:10 to 1:18 and then tell me that. Also, whether you follow the instructions or not, you're gonna end up looking retarded. Just a heads up.
Thanks to Rémy, whose name may have been lost in formatting.
Oct 25 2009 All Windows Start Up And Shutdown Noises
Ever wanted to hear all the Windows startup and shutdown sounds from Windows 3.1 to Vista (suck it, Windows 7, you can't play with us!) in one short 1:11 video? Well you're in luck, cause here it is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AYE AYE AYE!!!! Really brings back memories, doesn't it? Yeah, mostly bad ones, but still. Hey -- just be thankful you're not that guy in Momento.
Complete collection of Windows startup/shutdown sounds [dvice]
Aug 5 2009 Cool: When Lasers And Sharpies Collide
I honestly have no idea what I just watched but it had something to do with lasers and Sharpies, both of which I am huge fans of (I love your music!). Something about a laser and music and following a line. Honestly, the video could be fake for all I know. Haha, kidding -- I know everything. Well, not everything. I WAS ASKING FOR YOUR NUMBER, GOD!
Thanks to chubo, who once mounted a laser inside a Sharpie and then forgot and burnt a nostril trying to huff it.
Jul 14 2009 Cats Manipulate People With Their Purrs
So apparently cats can exploit their caretakers to get what they want through the use of a special purr. I can't say I'm surprised, that's a picture of two of my old cats there (rest in peace, guys). One minute they were purring -- and the next I was teaching them how to read!
Researchers at the University of Sussex have discovered that cats use a "soliciting purr" to overpower their owners and garner attention and food.
Unlike regular purring, this sound incorporates a "cry", with a similar frequency to a human baby's.The team said cats have "tapped into" a human bias - producing a sound that humans find very difficult to ignore.
I dunno, I'm not really that big into babies crying. But maybe that's just my fatherly instincts talking. Read: impregnate and run. What can I say -- I'm a nurturer.
Cats 'exploit' humans by purring [bbcnews]
Thanks to FDSY, Sharkey, RealLifeF***up and Ryan, who are all controlled by an entirely different kind of cat.
This post dedicated in loving memory of The Little Man, October, Jimmy and The Terrorist.
Jun 5 2009 Finally, I Can Sleep At Night: Researchers Develop Algorithms To Mimic Water Sounds
The watery sounds you hear in this video were all made using algorithms developed by researchers at Cornell, because, honestly, curing diseases can wait.
Doug James and Changxi Zheng, researchers at Cornell University, have developed a way to simulate the sounds of flowing or dripping water, which in real life are produced by tiny air bubbles that compress and expand due to surface tension, creating sound waves in the water.
So by using the geometry of a 3D scene, the Harmonic Fluids algorithm they developed can calculate where the air bubbles would have been created in real life and how they would have moved, which allows realistic accompanying sounds to be generated.
Now don't get me wrong, that's neat as hell, I just wish they would have made their research a little more useful in the real world. Like, I dunno, developing an algorithm to mimic the mating calls of prehistoric dinosaurs. Am I right? If we're not gonna cure cancer I should at least get laid.
Cornell Researchers Develop Algorithms To Simulate The Sounds Of Fluids [ohgizmo]
Mar 21 2009 Waveform Bracelets Are A Clever Idea
The Sound Advice Project was designed to help parents keep their kids off drugs by giving them a reminder of how much they're loved and how bad drugs are. In this case, it's a bracelet that says, in waveform, something like "you're way too cool for drugs", or, "drugs will make your penis shrink". Thankfully, for $18 you can go to the website and record whatever message you want. I decided to made one for myself with one of my favorite inspirational messages from the bible, "When in doubt, PEW PEW PEW". *WHA-PISSSH!* Whoa, what was that? You getting bible-belted, son!
Feb 19 2009 Guy's Cabinet Door Sounds Like Chewbacca
This is a video of a guy opening and closing a cabinet door so the whole world can hear how it sounds like Chewbacca. Also, 'holy shit, this is amazing!' should never be used to describe a cabinet door. "Say, are you that guy that made the Chewbacca squeaking door video?" "I most certainly am!" "You sir, are a loser -- how much for the cabinet?"
Guys Cabinet Door Sounds Exactly like Chewbacca! [funnyordie]
Thanks to Erik, who has a screen door that sounds like Jar Jar getting shot in the face by an arrow.
Oct 30 2008 Thriller: One Guy, 64 Different Voices
This is a video of a guy singing Michael Jackson's iconic Thriller acapella using 64 clips of himself making all the different noises. I was impressed, and you could clearly tell it was a labor of love. Probably illegal love.
Thriller as a 64-Voice Acapella [collegehumor]
Thanks to Ravage, who played Thriller on the kazoo for a middle school talent show.
Oct 13 2008 Not Our Children!: Toy Doll Promotes Islam
A bunch of parents think a Fisher-Price doll is promoting Islam. The doll in question, the Little Mommy Real Loving Baby Cuddle and Coo Doll is not only poorly named, but spouts religious messages (as alleged by previously mentioned soccer moms). The doll is only supposed to make cooing sounds and say mama, but many retarded parents believe the doll is saying "Islam is the light" and "Satan is King". I'm not making this stuff up folks, people really believe this. And also, that the world is round. You stupid f***ers, you make me laugh!
Fury over doll's 'Islam message' [thesun]
and
Youtube
Thanks to Silver Sided, who once owned a doll that could predict the future.
Sep 5 2008 Study: Sports Cars Really Do Turn Women On
Despite containing drivers with notoriously small packages, women really are turned on by exotic sports cars, according to a study recently conducted by British insurer Hiscox (!).
To test the theory that high-performance cars get people hot, Moxon had 40 men and women listen to recordings of the three Italian exotics and a Volkswagen Polo. Everyone had significantly more testosterone after hearing the exotics, and all of the women were turned on by the Maserati. The guys, on the other hand, were drawn to the Lamborghini."We saw significant peaks in the amount of testosterone in the body, particularly in women," Maxon says, noting that even women who said they had no interest in cars were turned on. "Testosterone is indicative of positive arousal in the human body so we can confidently conclude from the results out today that the roar of a luxury car engine actually does cause a primeval physiological response."
Wait a minute -- testosterone is what makes a person turned on? So what if I buy a Ferrari to impress the chicks, but then end up in a steady relationship? Will she, you know, dude-ify? Because, as the saying goes: fool me once, shame on you, but you grow a penis and this relationship is f***in' over.
Hit the jump for videos of each car so you can hear for yourself.
Continue Reading " Study: Sports Cars Really Do Turn Women On "
Aug 11 2008 The Telemegaphone Is Now Accepting Calls
The telemegaphone is a combination telephone and megaphone, hence the clever name.
Telemegaphone Dale stands seven meters tall on top of the Bergskletten mountain overlooking the idyllic Dalsfjord in Western Norway. When you dial the Telemegaphone's phone number the sound of your voice is projected out across the fjord, the valley and the village of Dale below.
Telemegaphone Dale is wind powered and self-reliant. Recently however, the weather has been exceptionally calm in Dale and there has been a massive amount of people calling.If the Telemegaphone doesn't pick up, just give it a few hours to recuperate and try again. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Awesome -- finally somebody who will listen to me. Hello, Dale? Are there any pretty birds around? TWEET TWEET! Here birdy birdy! How's the view? Is it as awesome as I'm imagining? Is there a rainbow? I bet there's a rainbow. There is, isn't there? Shit, was that just Bigfoot? Haha, made you look. Quick, a unicorn! Jesus, you're gullible. *flush* What? No, I'm not calling from the bathroom. Wait, don't hang up! I need you. You're my only friend. You and the woodland creatures are all I have. Will you stay on the line until I fall asleep? Please? Okay, now let's so goodnight at the same time. Ready? Goodnight! Oh, you were off, let's do it again. Hello? HELLO?
Thanks to Abraham, the OG Emancipation Proclamater.
Jan 24 2008 Darth Vader Transformer Has Identity Crisis
Thinkgeek is selling these 11" tall Darth Vader Transformers for $50. For that price you get the main figure along with 3 mini Storm Troopers, 3 little Tie Fighters, and a mini Vader. The figure also comes with a few weapons and makes different noises depending on his mood and what kind of weapons he's holding. Sounds good right? Well there's a problem: It's completely unbelievable. The first Death Star had a diameter between 120 - 160km ( ~75 - 100 miles). That's freaking huge. So if you had a Vader that big, why even bother building a Death Star? Vader could just land on the planet and kick the shit out of any Ewoks that got in his way. Just swing the ol' lightsaber around for a day or two and everyone is dead. Plus you get to keep the planet afterward instead of vaporizing it. Win, win. That being said, I ordered two of these. One for myself and one for my daughter because I forgot her birthday. I've got my fingers crossed she doesn't want it though so I can keep one mint condition. *pew pew*
UPDATE: Two pictures added of horrible, horrible, horrible Chewbacca and Han Solo Millennium Falcon Transfomers added, thanks to the beatiful Melissa. You really have to see them to believe the awfulness.
Hit the jump for a few more pictures of the entire thing.
Continue Reading " Darth Vader Transformer Has Identity Crisis "
