Nov 5 2009 Inner City Bike Sports No Chain, Comfort

Because bike chains (and gold chains) are such a hot commodity in the inner city, the Inner City Bike doesn't have one. Or a comfortable seat. Or much practicality. I have to have it!

Bicycling to work may be the way to go for some, but parking could still be an issue. That's why Jruiter Studio has come up with the "Inner City Bike". It boasts an ultra compact design and has no chain to boot

There's a shot of a guy riding it after the jump, which I'll be the first to admit doesn't look as uncomfortable as I thought it would. But I won't be the first to admit where I hid the jewels. Not even if you tortur -- TOP DRAWER, UNDER ALL THE SOCKS. PLEASE DON'T HURT ME, I HAVE CHILDREN I DON'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT!

Hit it for a guy sitting on the thing.

Continue Reading " Inner City Bike Sports No Chain, Comfort "

Oct 29 2009 Uh-Oh: Another Little Running, Jumping Robot

ROPID is a little robot created by Robo Garage (burn it down with an oily rag!) whose name combines the words 'robot' and 'rapid'. Very clever. Or should I say vever? I'm gonna stick with very clever. Anyway, this is a video of ROPID showing off his moves at a press conference. He (sometimes) responds to voice commands and can run (which technically isn't running, just walking fast), dance and jump. Plus look kinda cute. There, I said it -- just because you hate something with all your heart doesn't mean you can't find it beautiful. Take Edward Cullen for example.

ROPID Can Jump And Run, Almost [botjunkie]

Thanks to partychancer, fabian, Xkrimeg, Richthegringo, Harsh and Mira, who aren't ashamed to admit they've thought about what it would be like to be with a robot romantically. Bad move, guys -- burn them at the stake!

Oct 21 2009 Tiny North American Dino Discovered, I Want

You see that handsome little devil Steven Spielberg's holding? That's a Fruitadens haagarorum, the smallest dino ever discovered in North America. I want a million of them. No, even more than that.

The newly identified creature weighed less than two pounds and stood about 4 inches tall. From head to tail, it measured a little over 2 feet long, said Luis Chiappe, director of the Dinosaur Institute of the Natural History Museum of Los Angeles County where the fossil bones are stored.

It likely ate plants and hunted bugs during the late Jurassic period, about 150 million years ago. It was so tiny and fast that it probably darted between the legs of larger dinosaurs, researchers said.

The dinosaur "would have looked like a roadrunner on steroids," Chiappe said.

Oh man, can you actually imagine a roadrunner on steroids? That poor coyote.

Fossil bones of smallest dinosaur [wtnh]

Thanks to zerv, who asked if I have a size cut off which was rude because I DON'T DISCRIMINATE AGAINST LITTLE PEOPLE WHY WOULD I DINOS?

Oct 13 2009 Because Crocs Suck: Sweet Dino Shoes

Dinosaur shoes: more erotic than having your junk stomped in stilettos. And now, thanks to Weboo, you can own a pair -- provided you can stuff your man-feet into toddler sized footwear (is it too late to bind my feet?!). Plus, no laces! It was funny, just this morning an elderly woman on the bus asked me if I had a dinosaur shoe in my pocket or if I was just happy to see her. I told her both and winked. She got off at the next stop.

Product Site
via
Kid's Dinosaur Shoes Threaten Bugs With Teeth & Arms [fashionablygeek]

Thanks to Dick, who doesn't wear shoes because he has ninja feet and can walk on hot coals and razor blades.

Oct 11 2009 Backwards!: NES Cartridge Plays Games

We've seen Nintendos stuffed into NES cartridges before, but never with such a quality final product.

My nesP is basically a noname china brand portable media player, with the advantage of being able to play nes roms, and a nes controller hacked to the controls....Well it worked perfect, it was like it was made to fit, I didn't use any hot glue or anything other than some double sided tape to hold the battery in place. It's a really tight fit though. It's got 4gb built in memory, with a sd card slot in the inside so you could expand the memory if needed, and not only does it play nes games, but it also plays gameboy and gameboy color roms as well. 2.8" TFT LCD, built-in rechargeable lithium battery, Video player, MP3 player, FM radio, Picture viewer, Audio recorder, it's got a camera and video camera (but I disabled them to fit in the case), built in speaker, and the best part... TV-OUT !!! so you can play on the big screen!

I would rock that. Of course, I would rock a lot of things. Including, but not limited to: your ass at some Powerstone 2 on Dreamcast! Bring it, chumps!

Several shots of the innards and a video (extra points for being Youtube user 'robotswillkillyou') of the console in action after the jump.

Continue Reading " Backwards!: NES Cartridge Plays Games "

Sep 3 2009 Eeeek, Kill Them!: I-SWARM Robotic Army

Bugs don't scare me. But tiny robots? Tiny robots scare the shit out of me. Just look at those evil bastards ganging up on that defenseless screw. It's sickening.

These tiny (4 millimeters on a side) robots are members of the I-SWARM project, which stands for Intelligent Small-World Autonomous Robots for Micro-manipulation. Each robot is simple, with three legs and a little poker to manipulate stuff with. They're designed to work in large, cheap, mass producible, replaceable groups doing things that insects would be good at... Surveillance, obviously, but they could also do things like clean your house by taking care of one bit of dust each.

No, really, this isn't necessary. If I wanted teeny little robots running around everywhere I would have killed myself and gone to hell. Because that's exactly what it's like. Except they're on fire. And they crawl in your holes.

I-SWARM Micro Robots [botjunkie] (the very thought of which makes me sick)

Thanks to Nick, Michael, MDGrein, Ashley and Skynet (screw you!), who are all cool in my book. Except for Skynet. Skynet should implode.

Aug 25 2009 Don't Smoke It!: Lighter Looks Like Cigarette

This $1.50 lighter from DealExtreme is in form factor of a regular sized cigarette and can set stuff on fire. Including, but limited to: cigarettes, spliffs, joints, hair, your sister's Barbies, cologne, fireworks and witches. I jest, there's no such thing as witches. Isn't that right, sorceress? Also, is it true what they say about a sorceress's nipples -- they can shoot flames?

Cigarette-shaped lighter blends in with its surroundings [dvice]

Aug 19 2009 Is This The New PS3 Slim? (Yes, Yes It Is)

Sorry folks the internette at the hotel was bitchtitting me this morning so I just gave up and came to LaGuardia to post from here. Don't think I forgot about you. I could never. Anyway, I'll post as much as I can before my flight, and Geekologie will return to its regularly scheduled program tomorrow.

Soooooo, this is the new PS3 Slim. The 120GB console will be available the first week in September for a price cutted $299. BUT THAT'S NOT ALL THEY CUT! The unit is 33 percent smaller and 36 percent lighter than its chubs predecessor. So what does this mean for you? It'll be easier to lose. Hell, I even thought the original PS3 was too small to keep track of. WHICH IS WHY I GLUED IT TO THE COUCH.

Sony Announces Slim PS3 - It Lives This September! [kotaku]

Thanks to Mr. Tiddles, catch22, Nate and The Superficial Writer, who tape their consoles to cinder blocks. Hey, that works too.

Aug 4 2009 Folding Bike Fits Within Circumference Of Tire

24-year old inventor Dominic Hargreaves has designed and built a bike that folds up to the size of the bike's wheels. Not as impressive as a bike that folds up into its own squeaky horn, BUT NOT EVERYONE IS THIS GENIUS.

"I couldn't find a folding bicycle I liked...I wanted something that could take a bit of punishment and that you could have fun with. So I made one myself."

Mr Hargreaves has been in contact with various manufacturers and hopes to get the bike into production soon.

Cool. I've never ridden a folding bike before because I value my safety, but I have ridden a bike with no seat before. It was good times. For both of us.

Inventor's Bike Folds Into Its Own Wheel [yahoonews]

Thanks Pete, now get your top men on a folding jetpack STAT.

Jul 29 2009 Pie Suckers: I Could Probably Eat A Million

Pie suckers are exactly what they sound like: a race of aliens that come down and suck people's pies out of their kitchen windows while they're cooling. No I don't look at pictures or read stuff, I just post! I'm a posting machine. BUT DON'T YOU DARE CALL ME A ROBOT OR I WILL BEEP BOOP BOP YOUR FACE IN! Okay, I looked at the picture. Are you happy now? Pie suckers are actually miniature pies on sticks, officially making them the most brilliant things I've ever heard of (move over Pop Tarts!). I just ate like four hundred of them with the sticks. Now my tummy hurts. What are you waiting for -- PUNCH ME IN THE GUT, YOU SISSY!

Artisticly Delicious - Pie Suckers [writhem]

Thanks to Michael, who better have a case of these in the mail to me. OR ELSE. Or else somebody else is gonna have to make me some. Anybody? Notice how I said anybody instead of ladies? I really wanted to say ladies BUT I AM TURNING OVER A NEW, MORE SENSITIVE CRUST. Womens?

Jun 30 2009 It's Itsy Bitsy!: Tiny Drill Is Tiny

This is a super tiny drill. It is the opposite of this drill. If these two drills were siblings, this one would be Danny Devito in Twins. But it does actually work (video HERE). Now I have no idea what in the hell you'd use such a tiny drill for, but if I had to guess, I'd go with dollhouse repairs. You hear that, Ken? *sobbing* THIS DREAMHOUSE IS IN SHAMBLES!

Micro Power Drill [bookofjoe]

Thanks to naas, whose drill is not much bigger. Burn? BURN!

Jun 9 2009 USB Microwave Is World's Smallest, For Beans

The Heinz Beanzawave is being billed as the world's smallest microwave and measures a scant 7.4 inches tall by 6.2 inches wide and 5.9 inches deep. It's equally suited for heating a can of beans/soup at your desk or frying your nuts so you can't have children.

The mini microwave is being developed as a partner to Heinz Snap Pots, baked beans in single-serving containers. The Snap Pots, available in the U.K., fit perfectly into the Beanzawave. But the $160 device will only be released commercially if consumer feedback is positive and if component prices drop in the near future.

Well you can count me on board. I'M ON A BOAT! Just kidding, I wish I was though. No, right now I'm just laying in bed topless braiding my penises. Now where'd I put that scrunchie?

Beanzawave: The World's Smallest Microwave [fastcompany]

Thanks to scottsc, who cooks his beans at work the old fashioned way: on a campfire in the boardroom.

May 30 2009 Own Your Very Own (Miniature) Bat Signal

Want your own miniature bat signal? Now's your chance -- a limited edition of 500 are being sold for $260 from Entertainment Earth.

The miniature replica Bat-Signal features a sturdy metal construction and stands about 12-inches tall. It's got a built-in cooling fan and can be swiveled and tilted to give you the best shot at making contact with the Dark Knight. Of course, since the light can only project the Bat symbol about 16-feet, don't expect him to show, unless he happens to live in your bedroom closet.

Now I'm not saying you should cut a bat out of black contact paper and slap it on a pre-existing lamp, but, I mean, recession. $4 bat signal: 1, $260 bat signal: 3. Wait a minute -- 3? Damn you, style points!

desktop bat-signal hails bugs not bats [technabob]

May 26 2009 13,500 Pages Of Data Etched On A 3" Disk

The Rosetta Disk is a 3" nickel disk that has been etched with over 13,500 pages of information on how to read and understand the world's languages in case aliens get tired of sticking things up our butts and want to get their learn on. It represents over 1,500 languages and requires a 500x microscope to read a single page. You hear that, aliens -- don't forget your microscopes (read: leave the probes at home).

Hit the jump for a close-up that isn't close enough.

Continue Reading " 13,500 Pages Of Data Etched On A 3" Disk "

May 16 2009 What The World's Smallest Car Looks Like

This is what the world's smallest (but not the lowest) street-legal car looks like. Because this is the world's smallest street-legal car. I don't know if you understand logic, but my argument is infallible. The car, which measures a scant 39" high x 26" wide, is allegedly twice as small as the last record holder.

Car modder Perry Watkins took the frame of the "Postman Pat" children's ride and mounted it on a quad mini-bike, using its 150cc engine. The car features a windshield wiper, lights and signals, mirrors, and even a Pimp My Ride-worthy paint job and fake racing exhaust pipes. The car, christened "The Wind-Up," can hit 40 miles per hour in what we're sure is an incredibly uncomfortable and scary ride.

Good looking, Perry. And you know what they say about guys who drive really small cars don't you? Serious neck and back problems. Kidding, kidding -- monster junk.

Hit the jump for a short video about the build and some driving footage.

Continue Reading " What The World's Smallest Car Looks Like "

May 14 2009 Awh, How Cute: A Little LEGO Nintendo

This is a little Nintendo Flickr user Arkov made using LEGO pieces. As you can see, it's fairly simple. I didn't actually bother counting the number of blocks it took, but given a quick glance, I'd estimate somewhere in the six to eight range. Few enough for even you to be able to make one. Just kidding, you'd probably end up eating all the pieces. Which.....HEY, PUT THAT HELMET BACK ON! Your mother would kill me if she came home and saw you without your -- WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE SCISSORS?!?

Hit the jump for some sexy closeups.

Continue Reading " Awh, How Cute: A Little LEGO Nintendo "

May 13 2009 Chipmunk Meets The Star Wars Universe

This is a little photo gallery of a friendly chipmunk named Billy exploring the Star Wars universe in Flickr user powerpig's backyard. All the photos are real, Billy just happens to be very receptive to curious Ewoks and stormtroopers (and maybe even a little Chewbacca action!). Heartwarming, isn't it? You keep him distracted, I'll fire up the grill.

Hit the jump for a few more and a link to the entire Flickr gallery.

Continue Reading " Chipmunk Meets The Star Wars Universe "

Apr 30 2009 Dead Bugs + Old Watch Parts = 'Cybugs'

Mike Libby is a Maine-based artist who glues old watch parts on dead bugs to create steampunk looking insects. Which actually seem pretty cool until you realize that this is what robots will really look like in a few years. True story: one time I let a beetle crawl into my ear just to know what it would feel like. Unfortunately, it burrowed into my head (not unlike a Ceti eel) and I had to brain myself with an ice pick to get it out. If you couldn't tell, that was a pickup line. Ladies?

The artist, who holds a degree in sculpture from the Rhode Island School of Design, says his Insect Lab began after he found a dead, intact beetle. He thought the bug looked and operated like a little mechanical device, and decided to combine the two in a statement about the similarities and contradictions between nature and technology.

And speaking of statements about the similarities and contradictions between nature and technology: I just zip-tied a laser pointer to my penis. Now -- who wants to see some REAL art?

Hit the jump for a bunch more, including a ROFLCOPTER.

Continue Reading " Dead Bugs + Old Watch Parts = 'Cybugs' "

Apr 7 2009 GM And Segway Making P.U.M.A. 'Car', Looks Suspiciously Like A Motorized Wheelchair

General Motors and Segway have teamed up to produce what might very well be a slightly modified Hoveround. It's self-balancing like a Segway, but with the style and quality you've come to expect from GM. And as you can see, they do come with the Gob Bluth seal of excitement.

The self-balancing Personal Urban Mobility and Accessibility Project (P.U.M.A.) can reach top speeds of 35 MPH, has a lithium battery that lasts up to 35 miles with a single charge, and features vehicle-to-vehicle (V2V) communication for potentially reducing the number of accidents. No word on when or if this'll actually go into production but it's expected to be priced at just 25% that of a regular automobile.

Wow, that is one vehicle (in addition to a seatless bicycle) I can safely say I have absolutely no interest in driving. My God -- could you imagine getting T-boned in that thing? *BOOM* Porterhoused!

GM and Segway's P.U.M.A. unveiled and no, this isn't a joke [engadget]

Thanks to Julian, who successfully rode a Segway down a flight of stairs but then got hit by a bicycle messenger at the bottom and lost a tooth. It was never found.

Feb 12 2009 The Universe Is Apparently A Big Metal Donut

And all along I thought was a little plastic danish. Shows you how much I know (read: everything). So yeah, ghost of Karl Sagan: I know you're reading this, feel free to chime in and back me up whenever you want.

At first, this polished object looks like an ordinary ring. But it's much more than that. This is a model of the universe, which, according to one increasingly popular theory, is not flat, circular, spherical or saddle-shaped, but more like a "3-torus," or doughnut shape. It's also a whole lot bigger then you may have imagined.

Look closer, and you'll notice a minuscule speck on this model. It looks like a tiny flaw at first, but upon closer inspection, you'll see it's a precise wine glass shape. That's us. The tiny area depicts the known universe, showing a timeline of its entire life, from the Big Bang starting at the glass's stem, expanding to where we live today.

I get it -- so what they're saying is that the known universe is a wine lover. So do you think it's a Merlot fan or more of a Chardonnay kind of universe? Mad Dog 20/20, huh? Awh yeah, I knew I was living here for good reason! Now stop hogging the bottle, Universe, Jesus you're a boozehound.

Mind-boggling model of the doughnut-shaped universe makes you feel really small [dvice]