Jun 25 2009 No Thanks: World's Largest Alarm Clock
The world's largest alarm clock is actually the sun, but I'll look past that for the sake of this scary bitch, who's convinced he's made the largest. Now I don't want to ruin the video for you, but there is absolutely no way he originally designed that as an alarm.
The World's Biggest Alarm Clock [geekygadgets]
Thanks to MaverickPS, who wakes up the way God intended: with a dog licking his face.
Jun 24 2009 Afraid To Sleep: The Sonic Bomb Alarm Clock
The Sonic Bomb alarm clock is powerful enough to raise the dead. Why? For one, it comes with a 113dB alarm (louder than a jackhammer). But if that's not enough to wake you from your beauty fugly rest, it also flashes a bedside lamp on and off and has a 12-volt bed vibrator. Awake yet? The bomb sells for $43 and is guaranteed to make you frightened to fall asleep. Not unlike my creepy roommate, who, damnit, I CAN SEE YOU THERE BY THE DRESSER.
Thanks to Cameron, who BOOM SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE THE ROOM.
Mar 1 2009 Awww: Bizkit The Sleepwalking Dog
This is a video of Bizkit the sleepwalking dog. You should watch it, it's funny and sad at the same time. SPOILER ALERT: The dog sleepwalks into the wall. I originally thought it was cruel, but then watched the rest of the user's videos and they film the dog all the time, so I don't think they knew it would run into the wall. That said, I'm stealing Bizkit and starting a circus. DOOT DOOT DOODLE DOOT DOO DOO DOO DOOT. Cotton candy makes my clothes come off!
Hit the jump for a couple other videos of Bizkit, including one of some wicked sleep-standing action.
Feb 6 2009 True Love: Guy Wakes Up After One Night Stand, Woman Carved Her Name Into His Arm
Oh wow, I thought this sort of thing only happened in romance novels. Apparently Wayne Robinson, went over to Dominque Fisher's house for a little sex after a night of drinking and Valium, and woke up the next morning with her name carved into his arm and a bunch of other cuts. Valium: sleep through anything.
When I woke I was covered in blood. Dominique was snoring. I just had to get out of there. I didn't even wake her to ask what she'd done.'
'I'm scarred for life,' he told The Sun. 'I wish I'd never met her.'He said: 'I went to her place for sex, not to be tattoed. I can't believe she did this to me and I hate her.
Haha, that's what you get, Wayne. Getting cut is the non-collegiate equivalent of waking up with a giant Sharpie penis on your cheek. That said, don't lie -- you'd hit it again.
Hit the jump for a picture of the couple (both very good looking) and another of the rest of the damage.
