This is the Horizontal Shower from luxury bathroomer Dornbracht. You just lay on the stone pedestal like you're about to be sacrificed for a plentiful harvest, then let the six water jets soak your body, flooding your ass with cleanliness and washing away any rogue buttcrumbs ... / Continue →

Remember Panasonic's announcement of a hair-washing robot? Well here's a terrifying video of the shampoo strangler in action. *shivers* You couldn't pay me enough to stick my head in there with a f***ing crash helmet on. Hit the jump for the future of scalping technology. ... / Continue →

A whole bathroom in a tidy little column, what will they come up with next? *Please say Everlasting Gobstoppers, please say Everlasting Gobstoppers* "No-wipe toilet paper". I'll take it! The veritable Swiss Army bathroom has 7 rotating modules stacked and skewered to shrink... / Continue →

If it makes you guys feel any better, I actually use body wash. As a matter of fact, I just reupped at Target last night. I'd tell you what brand I got but I was drunk and it looks like I accidentally picked up a double-pack of Summer's Eve instead. Just kidding, that's what... / Continue →

This is a designer shower head that was on display at Milan Design Week 2010 that looks like a deer's face. Water comes out of it's mouth and is perfect for the outdoorsy type and furries. But not me. I want a shower head that looks like a woman's face. I also want to pour ... / Continue →

Every wanted to rub a frozen Han Solo between your breasts/buttcheeks while you were showering and get clean at the same time? I'm with you -- I don't even care about the cleanliness aspect . And for $6.50 you can do whatever you want to with him! Each soap is hand detailed ... / Continue →

Remember the chocolate weaponry we featured awhile ago? Well now the same company is manufacturing weapon soap. Probably from the same molds as the chocolate. I'd still wash my mouth out with it. Also, b-hole. Don't act like you've never lost one of those little seashell s... / Continue →

Soap, as you may well know, is an integral part of cleaning yourself unless you're European. And what better way to keep your gooch minty fresh than a giant D-20 soap on a rope? Plus no more prison shower sex! Kidding, kidding, still plenty of prison shower sex. Anyway, Ets... / Continue →

Etsy seller Cleaner Science (bonus points for a clever name!) makes soaps that look like bacteria growing in petri dishes. They sell for between $2.75 and $12 depending on the size, glow-in-the-dark capabilities, and whether they're on a rope (highly recommended for prison use... / Continue →

For those of you that like to get high and lie in the middle of a field staring up, the Leonid meteor shower is supposed to reach its peak tonight from 1AM to dawn. Great, I'll be hiding in the back of the hallway closet waiting for the apocalypse. It, uh, is 2012, right? T... / Continue →