Aug 11 2009 Questionable: The Personal Rockin' Computer
The PRC chair allegedly stands for Personal Rockin' Computer. But how on earth you would ever use a computer in that thing is beyond me. I mean, I couldn't even comfortably fry my nuts with a laptop in it. Plus, it costs a staggering $4,200. Can you say, "tractor tire"? Because I can. No, I'm fairly confident this thing is a glorified sex swing for the rich. Seriously, just look at that provocative tart in the picture. She definitely only knows one kind of hard drive and RAM if you ask me. Gosh what a hussy (let me get those digits, girl).
Jul 31 2009 Take Note: This Is How You Sell Video Games
In some of the best marketing I've seen in my entire life (and yours too), the makers of Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 went and attached some fake plaster boobs to a wall. I just pre-ordered like 80 copies and I don't even own a television or video game console.
The plaster mammaries assumedly belong to Sigma 2's Ayane or Momiji -- both are playable in this iteration of the game (the text which appears at the end of the video actually says "a female ninja appears")
The video consists of a bunch of people walking by and touching the breasts, which, be honest, you would have too. There's no shame in my game -- I totally would have. Then I'd have come back that night with a chisel AND MAKE THEM MINE.
Bizarre Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2 marketing features wall molestation [joystiq]
Thanks to Richard, who could sell safety matches to the devil.
Jun 25 2009 BK Ad: The King Used To Be Respectable
In what might be the smartest piece of advertising in recent history (whee, I just posted your whole freaking ad for free!), Burger King has released a print ad for their new Super Sloppy Seven Incher chock full of sexual innuendo. I don't see it, but allegedly it's there.
BK Goes Crude With 7-Inch Burger Ad [newser]
Thanks to solid and Pat, whose minds can't be blown away because they're in a lockbox.
May 13 2009 Spam Emails: Now With More Illustration
This is a picture from artist Elliot Burford's series of work entitled 'Spam', which features illustrations created using the titles of spam email, most of which are for wiener growing pills. I posted a bunch more of my favorites after the jump, but there are 24 in total (so far), so take a gander if you like them. I was particularly fond of this one, for obvious reasons -- I like the smell of gasoline. Kidding, BURN IT WITH FIRE!
Hit the jump for more.
Continue Reading " Spam Emails: Now With More Illustration "
Mar 18 2009 Percent Of Student Virgins Per College Major
As you can see, majoring in Mathematics or Chemistry pretty much guarantees you a sexless college experience. Good for you, hopefully you took a purity pledge or something. Now, if you'll excuse me, "CALLING ALL FEMALE STUDIO ART MAJORS, PARTY AT MY HOUSE -- BRING FINGERPAINT."
Virginity rates among students by major [forwardon]
Thanks to Julian (a poli-sci major) and Romeo, who majored in Juliet. HIYO!
Jan 16 2009 Virgin Auctioning Virginity Allegedly Gets $3.7 Million Offer -- I Should Know, It Was Me!
Remember 'Natalie Dylan', the 22-year old strumpet who's claiming to be a virgin so she can auction off her virginity to your dad? Yeah, well in what appears to be the longest-running auction ever (my last post was in early September), Natalie has allegedly received a $3.7 million dollar bid. Which, I want it to be noted, I wouldn't even pay for a virgin t-rex. F*** it, not even an albino virgin t-rex. Also, just look at that chick -- I've seen plenty of virgins (or at least the same one in the mirror everyday), and that ain't no Mary.
Natalie allegedly received over 10,000 bids and plans to use the money to go to college (read: get even bigger implants and become an adult-film star). Best of luck, Natalie, I'm rooting for you. And also, bidding. Tosseth aside thine chastity belt -- thou virginity is mine! F***, now I'm even creeping myself out.
22-Year-Old Sells Virginity Online -- and Feds Can't Do a Thing to Stop Her [foxnews]
Thanks to Bryan and The Superficial Writer, who, despite pooling their Whopper coupons, only came up with enough for a 30 seconds apiece with Natalie -- not that they'd need anymore. HIYO!
Nov 30 2008 Christmas Came Early This Year (And You Might Too): Gen¹³ Caitlin Fairchild Cosplay
As the angel of holiday cheer, I felt obligated to post these pictures of some chick cosplaying it up as Caitlin Fairchild from the Gen¹³ comic book series. Honestly, I had no idea who Caitlin was, but now I can safely say that her image is burnt into my retinas. Literally, I used a coat hanger and butane lighter. Hit the jump for three more pics, all of which are significantly cheekier than this one. You catch my drift? I'm talking about her ass -- her ass is hanging out.
Hit it, you want to.
Nov 12 2008 Sexy Animal Crackers Fetch $7.25 On eBay
A bull and donkey were caught mid-coitus in a bowl of animal crackers by some guy's wife. And, like a Virgin Mary pork rind, it ended up on eBay.
As you can see from the pictures, What we have here is a bull making sweet, sweet love to a donkey. (too bad it isn't an elephant---it would make a great political piece!) My wife pulled this out of a bowl of animal crackers a few weeks ago. I have been storing it in an air-tight bag since! The cracker was baked like this!!! No foul play!
No foul play my ass! That poor donkey. I think they're stuck together. Seriously though, who knew crackers could be so sexy? Just imagine cookies! *rolling out dough* Anybody have dinosaur cookie cutters?
eBay Auction
Thanks to RyanThePerson, not to be confused with RyanTheAnimalCracker.
Nov 4 2008 Go Vote (And Recieve A Free Sex Toy)!
If you haven't voted yet, go do it. Like right now. I'll still be here when you get back, no worries. And, if you live in New York or Seattle, go collect your free sex toy afterwards. Ah, democracy.
To encourage your involvement in the democratic process, Babeland is offering a Get Out the Vote Special Giveaway!!
Stop by any brick and mortar store (New York or Seattle) between November 4th and 11th and bring your voter registration card, voting stub or word of honor. If you voted, we'll give you a Silver Bullet or a Maverick Sleeve (get it?) for free! Yes, free. It's because we value voting that much. Sex toys for voting, only the satisfaction of having helped ensure your country's future can be better than that.
I have no idea what a Maverick Sleeve or Silver Bullet is, but they sound, well, awesome. And they're free! Then, when you candidate loses, you can [insert joke about getting f***ed in more ways than one for the next four years].
GO VOTE!
Get Out the Vote with Babeland [babeland]
Thanks to Jennie, who's upset she doesn't live in Seattle or New York.
Oct 7 2008 Virgin Galactic Refuses Money For Space Porn
Virgin Galactic recently refused $1 million from an undisclosed company to make a space porn aboard the SpaceShipTwo.
The cash was slapped on the table "up-front, for a sex-in-space movie", said the company's prez, Will Whitehorn, According to Space.com. He confirmed: "That was money we had to refuse, I'm afraid."According to Virgin, you only experience 5-minutes of weightlessness during the 2-hour flight to 62 miles high. Now I'm not saying that's not nearly long enough to make a good weightless space-porn, but you send me up there and I'll shoot two. Half of a third.
Virgin rejects $1m space sex offer [theregister]
Thanks to Pat, who's up to his eyeballs in alien vagina.
Oct 3 2008 Burton Releases Series Of Sexy Snowboards
Burton Snowboard's new Love series was made in cooperation with Playboy and feature busty centerfold pictures. Because let's face it, what could be cooler than cruising down the mountain on a booby-covered board? Ha, no, not dead hookerboarding, although....
Burton Love Series Snowboards [highsnobiety]
Thanks to Jo Mama, who knows I love the rich, chocolatey taste of Ovaltine.
