Nov 17 2009 I'm Taking 'Em With Me!: The Gerbil Shirt (Exclusively For Pudgy Red-Headed Kids)
Gosh, it seems like only yesterday I was hard at working fashioning a bong out of my gerbil's old Habitrail. But it wasn't, it was this morning I'm doing it right now. Anybody have a hot glue gun?
The Gerbil Shirt wraps your torso in plastic tube passageways, making your bod a super highway of fun for Binky and Bart. The interior surfaces are textured for traction and have air vents for easy breathing.
The inventor suggests you can clean the Gerbil Shirt by attaching it to a faucet (remove pets first please), and you should avoid collisions and falls that could cause pet panic.
Listen, I'm not one to judge, except I totally am BECAUSE I'M SO GOOD AT IT. Wapner? Pfft, that old pantstain couldn't gavel his way out of a wet paper bag. Judy? Wrinkled whore. But a Habitrail vest? That's just a solid product.
Gerbil Shirt [ohgizmo]
Thanks to david, who better not catch you trying to run one of those tubes up your butt.
Nov 12 2009 I Wasn't Looking For That: Mystery Google Gives You Previous Person's Search Query
Type a search query into Mystery Google and you get the results of the last person's search. For example, I searched for a serious medical condition I have, and got the results for "u'v got a face only ur momma could love". Neat? Yes. Helpful? Absolutely not. But don't let that stop you from blowing a few minutes screwing around with it. Remember: every minute wasted is a minute spent kicking the man in the junk. Go on -- kick him. Now do it again. HARDER! Okay now do me.
Thanks to Emortal, Blastphemer and Shadow Sushi, who don't search the interweb, the interweb searches them. So are we we talking like full body or what?
Nov 10 2009 World Of Warcraft Specific Search Engine
Finally, a search engine designed specifically for finding World of Warcraft information. At last, the internet is complete. No, wait -- it still needs an eHarmony for dinosaurs. I don't need 29 degrees of compatibility, I just want something with teeth and a tail! And, okay, wings. Holy shit I'm a dragon lover. Embracing it!
Thanks to Random User, who could be any one of you.
Oct 24 2009
The Internet Moon Is A Series Of Tubes!
So apparently the moon might consist of a network of interconnected tubes, like Swiss cheese. OMG the astronauts are gonna eat it! AAAAAAAAAAH I'M SO JEALOUS!
Images have revealed a hole on the Moon's surface that is at least 260 feet deep and may lead to an underground tunnel more than 1,200 feet wide which is part of an entire network of such winding tubes.
Scientists are hoping for clearer shots from NASA's Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter, but the impression so far is that such a tunnel network could provide shelter for astronauts or potential future Moon colonists.
Two words: giant space worms. Shut up, the giant is silent! But only while he sleeps. Kidding, he's a snorer! I'm not insane, you're insane! Plus a jerk.
Newly Discovered Hole On Moon Leads To Network Of Tubes [gizmodo]
Aug 5 2009 This Page Is Stupid And Cannot Be Displayed
This could be older than dino bones (but NOWHERE NEAR as sexy) for all I know, I just thought it was humorous because I pretty much see this message all the time and it makes me want to put my fist through the computer screen. Which I don't hesitate to do. Seriously, I'm already on like my fourth laptop. Of the day.
This page is stupid and cannot be displayed [org.nz]
Thanks to Nik, who once punched through his monitor and broke one of the internet's tubes.
Jul 8 2009 Do Want: Functional Vacuum Tube Chess Set
This is a chess set made with functional vacuum tubes that actually glow while you play, making it sweeter than sticky buns. And almost as fun to stare at. But not yours. No, not yours.
This wonderful vacuum tube chess set, by maker Paul Fryer, actually has electricity running inside the board so that the tubes can draw power and glow as you move them from square to square. It is called, somewhat appropriately, Chess Set for Tesla, and Paul actually made seven sets last year.
Nice, Paul, how about you send a set in this direction? I'll make it worth your while. Provided an all-you-can-eat wings buffet and mediocre conversation is "worth your while". ;) You sleep on it.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots.
Continue Reading " Do Want: Functional Vacuum Tube Chess Set "
Jun 24 2009 Interesting: Ray Bradbury Hates The Internets
Ray Bradbury, seen here showing you how to properly do an alien, hates the internet. The author, despite his often futuristic, sci-fi themes, may secretly be a unabomber.
"The Internet is a big distraction," said Ray Bradbury, author of Fahrenheit 451 and The Martian Chronicles, while speaking out in defense of libraries in The New York Times.
"Yahoo called me eight weeks ago," he said. "They wanted to put a book of mine on Yahoo! You know what I told them? 'To hell with you. To hell with you and to hell with the Internet.'"It's distracting," he continued. "It's meaningless; it's not real. It's in the air somewhere."
It's not "in the air somewhere", Ray, it's a series of tubes. One minute of fact-checking on Wikipedia could have told you that. Just sayin'.
Ray Bradbury to Yahoo: "To hell with the Internet!" [scifiwire]
Thanks to Chase and FDSY, who love the internet for all the joy porn it brings to their lives.
Apr 28 2009 Sure, Why Not?: Animal-Shaped Radiators
Guus van Leeuwen's Domestic Animal radiators heat your home without all the shedding and feces associated with keeping a real animal in the house.
[The] radiators are made using between 40 and 60 pieces of steel tubing which are bent using a computer and then welded together by the Eindhoven-based designer. The radiators can then be connected to the heating pipes via the tail. The pelts are real and have been filled with wheat seeds in order to conserve the heat.
Well it's about time! You hear that, Mr. Badger? It's time for you to make like a tree and get out of here. I mean it -- OUT! Oh, being stubborn are we? Fine. *BLAM!* Badger steak for everyone! And, on a 100% completely unrelated note that has absolutely nothing at all to do with sleeping with a badger -- anybody know how to get blood out of bedsheets?
Hit the jump for closeups of the different animals.
Continue Reading " Sure, Why Not?: Animal-Shaped Radiators "
Apr 6 2009 For Sale: The T-Virus Vial From Resident Evil
Want to own the T-virus?
Direct from the set of Resident Evil:Extinction comes the very very key virus tube! This is one of the most sought after movie collectibles from this franchise and is yours to bring home today. This is a glass vial with non-removable metal end caps with empty spiraling inner glass tubes. (One of the Tubes is loose) This measures approximately 4.75" x 1.5" and is screen used.
What do you mean, "One of the Tubes is loose"? I ain't paying no damn $4K for a nonfunctional virus container, I'll tell you that right now. You try to fill that up and next thing you know you're spilling T-virus juice down the front of your pants. Which....
UPDATE: It grew arms! Now, who needs a Monday hug?
Thanks to OctopusPie, who's delicious with a little CuttlefishIcecream.
Jun 27 2008 Wait, What? You Put The Servers Where?
So some company's lease expired and they had to move to different offices in the same building -- the only problem is there was nowhere to put their servers. So did they just fire an intern and and put them it in the poor sap's office? No. They did what any reasonable company would do and built a server room only accessible via another company's women's restroom. You know, in the handicapped stall.
The company's executives signed a new lease and prepared to move. There was, however, just one, small hitch. The nice little server room they built in the back of their office - equipped with air conditioning units, ventilation, dedicated power, backup power, and so on - could not be relocated. Not only would it cost too much, but there was simply no room for it. The server room would just have to remain upstairs.
Obviously, the new second-floor tenant wouldn't want their neighbors walking through their office to access a server room, so building management and the company's executives came up with an alternative: wall off the server room door and build a new one. It seemed simple enough, but there was, however, just one small hitch. The only available wall to install a door was adjacent to the women's restroom. Inside the handicapped stall.
Ha, that's great. And no, Superficial Writer, you can't go check on the servers again. That's like the third time you've asked this morning.
Server room built into ladies' room handicapped stall [bbgadgets]
Jun 6 2008 Online Service Sends Emails To Nonbelieving Friends/Family Left Behind After The "Rapture"
Youvebeenleftbehind.com is an online service that will send emails (assuming computers still work) to as many as 62 nonbelieving friends/family after you, the good Christian, have been conveniently relocated to heaven during the "Rapture".
We have set up a system to send documents by email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the "Rapture" of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 Christian team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.
Interesting. The service costs $40 a year and I just signed up. Of course, I'm only sending a single email:
Future Me,
Surprise, surprise -- you didn't make the cut. Now you're f***ed.
Website Lets You Send A Post-Rapture Email To Friends 'Left Behind' [wired]
Thanks to Sam for reminding me there are more apocalypses to worry about than just robot/zombie ones
Apr 25 2008 Where Do I Sign?: This Chick Will Do You If You're A Virgin And Swear By Net Neutrality
Warning: This is kind of risque. If your children are reading Geekologie over your shoulder then you should probably let them so they grow up to be the awesomest kids ever.
Tanya Devereaux is some chick that claims she'll do every virgin that takes an oath of internet neutrality.
I will make love with every virgin who defends the Internet. Certain ISP's are planning to limit internet access in a way that infringes upon internet freedom or 'net neutrality'. Description of Services The services consist of Tania performing sexual intercourse with the applicant, the form and style of the performance will be discussed prior to the act, Tania tries to allow as much freedom as possible in this area but she does reserve the right to decline suggestions. Tania covers all her personal expenses, including travel. Any sort of recording (video, audio or photographs) of the performance is allowed for non-commercial use. Tania adheres to high standards of service but due to time limitations each performance can last no longer than 30 minutes, no exceptions will be made under any circumstance.
Wow, then she goes on about some rules of conduct (which I have posted in their entirety after the jump), of which one particularly caught my eye: "If anywhere along the process, it becomes clear that the applicant is not a virgin, Tania reserves the right to terminate all activity." YES, I'M IN!! I've been having sex for well over a decade now and I guarantee there is no way in hell she'd ever think I have any experience.
Hit the jump for the full terms of service and an uncensored pic (still no nipple though).
