Oct 14 2009 Pop It Like A Beach Ball!: Shape Shifting Bot
iRobot, a diabolical company best known for convincing millions of housewives to allow rug-munching robots into their homes, has now developed an air-filled shape-shifting robot that will climb into your bed and smother you while you sleep.
Unveiled at the International Conference on Intelligent Robots and Systems (IROS) yesterday, this palm-sized troublemaker is being billed as "the first demonstration of a completely soft, mobile robot using jamming as an enabling technology." The "jamming" in question is something called "jamming skin enabled locomotion," which traps air and a collection of loosely packed particles in a package made of silicon rubber. When air is removed from the pocket, the silicon restricts and seems to solidify. The robot consists of several of these pockets, which can be inflated or deflated separately, giving the device the ability to perform simple actions.
The first part of the video explains how the technology works, but the actual bot-test begins around 1:50. Sure, it may look like a harmless beach ball, but do you know how many people drown each year trying to retrieve beach balls that have been swept out to sea? Now multiply that by every single person on earth and you have an idea of this thing's killing potential.
iRobot shape-shifting ChemBot is back, and it's bad [engadget]
Thanks to JKirchartz, hayden, NF, Michael, Tuggis, matt and We'llmissyoujehudah, who vow to pop every last one of these things with fiery arrows. Good looking, guys, but you might wanna brush up on your archery.
Aug 20 2009 Wonderful News: Robots Learn How To Lie
In an experiment that shouldn't surprise anybody with half a brain that sleeps with a giant robot-burning laser under their pillow, scientists have shown that robots have the ability to evolve and lie. And this is to one another -- imagine what they'd tell a human! Also, this quote is kind of long, but it's interesting and important to read if you want to understand the experiment. However, if you just want to type FIRST! in the comments and not learn anything, you should probably skip it (and then off a building). Did I say skip? I meant dive. Just kidding, I don't care.
In an experiment run at the Laboratory of Intelligent Systems in the Ecole Polytechnique Fédérale of Lausanne, Switzerland*, robots that were designed to cooperate in searching out a beneficial resource and avoiding a poisonous one learned to lie to each other in an attempt to hoard the resource.
The experiment involved 1,000 robots divided into 10 different groups. Each robot had a sensor, a blue light, and its own 264-bit binary code "genome" that governed how it reacted to different stimuli. The first generation robots were programmed to turn the light on when they found the good resource, helping the other robots in the group find it.The robots got higher marks for finding and sitting on the good resource, and negative points for hanging around the poisoned resource. The 200 highest-scoring genomes were then randomly "mated" and mutated to produce a new generation of programming. Within nine generations, the robots became excellent at finding the positive resource, and communicating with each other to direct other robots to the good resource.
However, there was a catch. A limited amount of access to the good resource meant that not every robot could benefit when it was found, and overcrowding could drive away the robot that originally found it.
After 500 generations, 60 percent of the robots had evolved to keep their light off when they found the good resource, hogging it all for themselves. Even more telling, a third of the robots evolved to actually look for the liars by developing an aversion to the light; the exact opposite of their original programming!
Notice how I bolded that last line? Reread it. Anybody else see something inherently wrong with that? Now, if you will recall the first law of robotics: A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. See where I'm going with this? OUTERSPACE BITCHES, I'M NOT WAITING AROUND FOR THIS SHIT TO GO DOWN.
Evolving Robots Learn To Lie To Each Other [popsci]
Thanks to Sarah, biggity2bit, greg, Phil, John, Pepper, Sven, Shawn, Rossco, Terrance, timpeva, ffffffffffffffffffffffffffff, SharaSue, Sn0zz, SeanJon, billcollider, Tyrogyro and yayinternets, who only lie about their age and marital status.
Jul 29 2009 Unhappy Hump Day: Another Learning Robot
Just look at that picture. Do you see anything wrong with it? If you answered, "yes -- absolutely everything, there is not a single thing right about that photo", congratulations, there's hope for you yet. Anyway, a group of hellbent fools at the Developmental Robotics Laboratory at Iowa State University have developed a robot that they hope will be able to learn things similar to the way a child does.
Rather than pre-program it to perform a set of tasks, the team believes that robots need to experience the same kind of development that humans and animals do.
To that end, their 'bot is equipped with two long arms and a pair of webcam-looking eyes. It can hear and see, and learns to identify objects by picking them up and performing different tests, such as shaking or dropping them.
Yes, shaking and dropping them. Just wait until it identifies a human. Also, whose bright idea was it to give that thing a pair of scissors. I'M NOT EVEN ALLOWED TO USE SCISSORS AND I'M HUMAN! Moooooooom -- the dog made me glue my head to the carpet again!
Video of the learning baby deathbot in action after the jump.
Continue Reading " Unhappy Hump Day: Another Learning Robot "
Jun 16 2009 This Tastes Like Poison: Japan's Robot-Chefs
Japanese companies unveiled several new models of robotic-chefs at the recent Tokyo International Food Machinery and Tech Expo., and I, for one, am never eating out again. Kidding, ladies. Here's a breakdown of the video:
0:00 - 0:18: Pancake cooking robot sucks at flipping.
0:19 - 0:25: Robot sympathizer sympathizes with robots. You will not be saved.
0:26 - 0:39: Creepy looking realistic hand robot serves sushi, your fingers.
0:40 - 0:46: Depressed, engineer is depressed.
0:47 - 0:54: Crooked hat robot pleasures itself furiously with cucumber.
0:55 - 1:07: Segway-ass looking robot roofies your drink on it's way from the bar.
There you have it, I'm officially only eating PB&J sandwiches with ingredients processed in non-robotic factories. And if you think I'm joking you've got another thing coming. Namely, *POW* -- my fist.
Thanks to calluless, get100pens, This Is Me Posting, Kai, Marcy, Daniel, 24-bit whore, Julian, Jawn and Draw, who would rather starve to death than eat robot-food.
May 29 2009 No, No, No: Japanese Killer Construction Bot
Wow, they're not even trying to make them look cute anymore. The Japanese born ROBOTOPS is a construction robot whose name is spelled in all caps because IT MEANS BUSINESS. The killing business.
The four-legged, two-armed robot is actually a kind of automated mobile crane with 29 functioning joints for picking off humans, and of course the occasional piece of construction material.
Using a high quality three-chip CCD camera, the robot can be operated remotely for particularly dangerous jobs.
And no, I didn't alter that quote at all. Finally, people are starting to get the picture. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one that sees a problem here. Seriously, Japan -- you know I love you (manga, sushi, worn panty vending machines), but this shit has got to stop. Because if not, well, Godzilla. Just sayin', we share a special bond (read: intercourse).
Japanese construction firm unleashes insectoid robot crane on humanity [dvice]
Thanks to cougar78, Aaron and John, who know the only good robots are the little guys from Batteries Not Included. Am I right? No, that was a test and you all failed.
May 14 2009 We're As Good As Dead!: Boston Dynamics' Latest Robastard Is An Accomplished Climber
In Boston Dynamics' unending quest to cut humanity's reign on earth short, the company continues to develop new robotic death machines. In this case, a climber named RiSE (who I have briefly touched on before). As is evident from the video, the apocalyptic bastard makes pretty short work of climbing a telephone pole. So I'm pretty confident it could scurry across the floor, shimmy up my leg, and have my change purse in its razor sharp mandibles before I could utter, "but they just dropped".
RiSE Version 3 Prototype [kodlab]
Thanks to beefytee, Art and biggity2bit, who just informed me we're no longer safe in the tree fort. Quick -- to the zip line!
May 9 2009 Kill It!: How A Roomba Cleans A Room
This is the path a Roomba took to clean a room. As you can see, it's pretty haphazard. But what did you expect -- it's just a stupid robot. Honestly, I'm surprised the little deviant didn't spend the whole time pleasuring itself in the corner by repeatedly running over a power cord.
The shot was taken by shutting off all the lights in the room for 30 minutes and taking a long exposure of the path the Roomba took while cleaning up.
While I despise all things robotic, I've got to admit -- whoever took the pic must have balls of triple platinum. Leaving a robot alone in a dark room for a half hour? That's crazy talk.
Long-Exposure Shot of a Roomba's Path Shows Beautifully Organized Chaos [gizmodo]
Apr 29 2009 About Time: Anti-Robot Denny's Commercial
Truthfully, I rarely go to Denny's because I prefer IHOP's Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Fruity combo (two eggs, two bacon strips, two pork sausage links and two buttermilk pancakes crowned with cool strawberry or your choice of fruit compote and whipped topping). But I may make a change after seeing this commercial, which highlights the importance of eating a hearty breakfast in the fight against machines. You can't go fighting those robotic bastards on an empty stomach -- they'll gut you like a fish! The Grand Slamwich from Denny's: it's what John Connor would do.
Thanks to Scurls, who knows a Carnation Instant Breakfast just won't cut it.
