Oct 27 2009 A Real Comic Book Character For Halloween

This is a picture of a woman who is Halloweening as an actual comic book character. You know, like the way a woman would look in an oldschool comic -- with the crappy dot printing and all. Except, in this case, she actually looks pretty good. Granted not as good as I'd look as a comic book character, but I'd draw myself with giant shirt chain-mail ripping muscles and a laser cannon. Did somebody say dinosaur mount? Plus dinosaur mount. Did you know my handsomeness is actually considered a super power? Because it is.

Hit the jump for several shots of the makeup going on.

Continue Reading " A Real Comic Book Character For Halloween "

Oct 7 2009 Oldschool Destruction: Rampage In Real Life

This is a video of the oldschool classic Rampage in real life, brought to you by the same angry bald man that produced the real life Paperboy (but not the movie). I chuckled. But I did NOT upchuck, even though I did two nights ago. That was the night I walked into the restroom at a bar and caught a guy standing at the pisser trying to blow a snot rocket on the wall above the urinal. So you know what I did? I waited till he was done pissing THEN WHIPPED HIS MONKEY ASS. Being gross: don't do it around me.

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Oct 6 2009 Dino-Rider: Geekologie Writer Vs. The Volcano

Jesse Starr, to thank me for showcasing his incredible Christopher Walken ballpoint pen portrait, took my shoutout at the end of the post, which read, "Thanks Jesse, now how about one of me riding a dinosaur battling a volcano?", and made the dream a reality. This is only a part of the piece, click HERE to see it in all its high-res glory. OH HELL YES! TAKE THAT, VOLCANO. Joe ain't got shit on me!

As an added bonus, Jesse made a video of how he created the piece, which you can see after the jump. But, SPOILER ALERT: there's a picture of my ugly mug involved, so shy away.

Hit it for the video.

Continue Reading " Dino-Rider: Geekologie Writer Vs. The Volcano "

Oct 5 2009 Another Gallery Of Video Games In Real Life

This is another little gallery of video games in realer life than they are when you play them. As you can see, this is a game I'm not familiar with. It looks like Tetris mixed with Rampage. I would call it Shape Rampagers, but that's just because I'M A WORLD CLASS GAME NAMER. Super Mario Bros.? Pfft, try Two Plumbers Fight To Bang The Princess. Yeah -- I'm that L337.

Hit the jump for a few of my favorites, and the link to a bunch more if you're interested in that sort of thing (I won't judge).

Continue Reading " Another Gallery Of Video Games In Real Life "

Sep 24 2009 Video Game Reality: Paperboy In Real Life

This is a video of the Atari classic Paperboy, but in real life. It's a little longer, and I know most of you have ADD (I'm right here with you), but it's definitely worth a watch while on the clock. Plus, the guys who made it are loyal Geekologists, and you know how I feel about you readers -- I love you all like little sisters! You know, from Bioshock. I'll harvest every last one of you!

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and
Funnyordie

Thanks to D_rock and cooperanimation, who don't need paperboys because they only read Geekologie. Smart. Plus you're saving trees!

Aug 7 2009 Why Not?: Playing Half-Life With A Real Gun

This is a video showing how, with a piece of sheetrock, a handful of accelerometers and a digital projector, you can play Half-Life by firing at the projected screen with a real gun. The first two minutes of the video explains how the system works, so if you don't care you can shoot(!) straight to 1:55 to check out the game play. Which, I should warn you, won't work with a regular LCD television. Or will it?!

UPDATE: It won't. And, uh-oh, looks like the Geek Squad is calling the cops.

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Thanks to Alexandra, who actually knows the guys who made this and should introduce me so that I can shoot guns with them. pew pew!

Aug 5 2009 Dang, You've Got It Rough: Video Game FML's

Even if you were just born this morning you've probably heard of FMyLife. The concept is simple: you make up some cheeselog story about how much your life sucks and then you post it on the internet (which is magic) so people can feel better about how much their lives suck. It's really a victorious feeling. So yeah, these are some FMyLife's written by famous video game characters. Now, I encourage you all to write your own video game inspired FML's in the comments. I'll get you started:

I think I'm in love. Unfortunately, every attempt I make at sweeping my love interest off her little feet is thwarted by a Big Daddy. FML

I agree, your life sucks (0) - you totally deserve it (24933024 jillion)
On 08/05/1960 at 8:24am - love - by Jack - Rapture, Atlantic Ocean

Hit the link for a couple more.

Video Game FMyLife [collegehumor]

Thanks to Joemo, whose life is awesome. Good for you, Joemo. No, really, I'm happy for you.

Jul 16 2009 Run Snoopy, Run!: Nightmarish Charlie Brown

This is a painting of Charlie Brown by artist Tim O'Brien. Scary, no? I'm sorry if you're not gonna be able to sleep tonight, but I live by the mantra "if I had to see, so do you". Sweet dreams!

Also, for the hundreds of people who keep sending the "dead body eating robot" tip, I posted it earlier this week. I get depressed as hell when I get the same tip I posted a few days ago. *sniff* Don't you read regularly? YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME!

Tim O'Brien's Painting of Charlie Brown [agentmlovestacos]

Thanks to FDSY, who you can blame for not being able to sleep at night. And not just because he's hiding under your bed, but he is.

Jun 18 2009 Aperture Laboratories Van Spotted In The Wild

"Hey kids, who wants free cake?!"

aperture science van tooling around, scaring the hell out of people [technabob]

Jun 10 2009 Street Fighter II Bonus Stage In Real Life

Alright, I have to lay off the ropacalypse posts for a little bit, I was starting to have heart palpitations. Also, a serious decrease in libido. Thankfully, I just watched Jurassic Park in fast forward, so I think I'll be okay. Anyway, this is the 'beat up the car' bonus stage from Street Fighter II reenacted by a real life Ryu. And, as you can probably tell, he received no bonus points.

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Thanks to asiantom, who would have begun with a couple well-placed Hadoukens to get the party started quickly.

May 1 2009 Cincinnati Has Its Own Superheroes, Both Super And Hero Debatable (Can I Join?)

Finally, Cincinnati has it's own superheros. Shadow Hare, a 21-year old masked vigilante, prowls the streets while leading a ragtag bag of other assholes crimefighters known as The Allegiance of Heroes (MUST SEE hero pep rally at 1:07). And, apparently, this isn't a unique phenomenon -- there's actually a World Superhero Registry (ANOTHER MUST SEE), showcasing all the real-life heroes operating around the globe. Which, after viewing, has inspired me to start my own group of crimefighters (now accepting applications). I'm thinking 'GW and the Nut-Busting Crusaders Of Truth And Cool Costumes'. Too professional?

Hit the jump for parts 2 and 3 of the news story about Shadow Hare. Trust me, best way to spend your Friday afternoon. ALLEGIANCE ASSEMBLE!

Continue Reading " Cincinnati Has Its Own Superheroes, Both Super And Hero Debatable (Can I Join?) "

Apr 18 2009 Why Not: Pac-Man Jackassery In Real Life

This is a video of some real life Pac-Man action. The video was created by Remi Gaillard (of real-life Mario Kart fame), who I assume is France's Jackass. Although I did like like the part where he tried to eat the woman's golf ball. Through a garden hose! Which, at least according to the wall above the urinal, your girlfriend. You lucky dog!

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Thanks to Jack and c devine, who once ate all four ghosts while they were blue and still saved room for more dots.

Apr 14 2009 Blade Work: Isao Machii, Modern Samurai

This is a video of Isao Machii, who is billed as a modern-day Samurai, showing off his skills with the blade. It's a long video, so I'll direct you to the good parts.

1:45: Cuts the top half of a mushroom's cap off. Sent shivers down my pants.
3:30: Horizontally cuts a bean lengthwise. Sent shivers down my pants.
5:15: Cuts a 6mm Airsoft BB shot at him in half. GW realizes bringing a gun to a Samurai fight might not be enough.
8:00: Cuts an iron pipe in half without bending or warping the pipe. This part is skippable, since I totally could have done that. With my penis. HI-YA, BITCHES!

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Thanks to Jason, who once got a watermelon pregnant just by glancing at it in the produce section of the grocery store.

Apr 1 2009 'Alpine Legend' Coming To XBox 360

This is a commercial for the Xbox's latest 'Guitar Hero' style game, 'Alpine Legend'. Designed for two players, one yodels while the other plays a monster skin-horn (aka alphorn). Obviously, this is some April 1st trickery so feel free to send the video to your friends and then call them an idiot and revoke your friendship when they get excited about the game. Which may or may not have happened to me (read: it did). Damn you, Scott, you got me good, man! That's okay though, I slept with your girlfriend. APRIL FOO....haha, not this time buddy.

Hit the jump for a real Hong-Kong XBox commercial that's just wack.

Continue Reading " 'Alpine Legend' Coming To XBox 360 "

Mar 11 2009 Race Car Controlled With Blackberry Storm

So apparently some guys programmed a Blackberry Storm to control a little toy race car using its accelerometers. Then they posted the video on Youtube. Then McLaren saw the video and contacted them about using the device to control a real race car. And that's what they did (second half of the video). Pretty neat. Sure, not as neat as controlling a race car with your mind, but hey, we'd have to go to the aliens for that technology. Which would probably require a few sacrificial probings. Just saying, I'm friends with them. Ladies? No? Okay, plan B. Effeminate gentlemen?

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Thanks to Curtis and Troy, who both know race car is the same spelled forward and backwards. It's palindromic!

Feb 22 2009 Selling Candy In Human Vending Machines

Kit-Kat, tired of me reaching my hand up through the door at the bottom and stealing their candy, has decided to call in the big guns: namely, human vending machines.

Don't expect these things to pop up on every street corner though; they are part of the 'Working Like a Machine' campaign that's being run by Kit Kat to show how people need a break from the monotony of day to day life.

The idea was stolen from Japan like everything else that is awesome in the world and makes me want to stick my hand up in a machine more than ever. Whatever, human vending machines need love too.

Kit Kat Unveils Human Vending Machines In London [gizmodo]

Thanks to Martyn, who once punched through the glass of a vending machine and stole a Snickers. Then I threatened to tell on him and ate the bar myself. It was the best one I've ever had.

Feb 14 2009 Real-Life Warhammer 40,000 Rhino Transport

So the creaters of Warhammer went and made a real-life Space Marine Rhino replica to folks excited about the upcoming video game. And, also, to crush the hell out of some little cars. Per my tipster, Sam:

Thought you might be interested in knowing about this, as it was modified from a old WWII British tank to promote the upcoming Warhammer 40000: Dawn of War 2 game that is about a week away from being released.

Nothing really amazing if it was just a normal tank (crushing cars is still cool, but still would be nothing new) but since it was heavily modified into a working replica (mostly) of the Warhammer 40000 Space Marine Rhino transport, it's been an ecstasy trip for 40kiers like me and anyone else seeing one their favorite tabletop franchise coming to life.

Freaking sweet -- I want one. And not just because some jerk broke my passenger side mirror off without leaving a note. No, it's because I want to crush the car that did it -- driver too! With a tank. A Warhammer tank. VROOM VROOM!! This ain't no table-top game, bitch, this is real life!

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Thanks to Sam, who Wars the Hammer like nobody's biz.

Feb 5 2009 Have You Ever Wondered How Much It Would Cost To Build Your Own Death Star? Hint: I Didn't Even Know That Was A Real Number

Let's face it, we all want our own Death Star. But how much would it actually cost to build one, today? Well, a lot. Try 15 septillion dollars. That's $15,602,022,489,829,821,422,840,226! Ladies and gentlemen, we may have to settle for the half-sized model.

(The Death Star has) a volume of 17.16 quadrillion cubic meters. At 1/10 volume, we'll need 1.71 Quadrillion cubic meters of steel, weighing in at 134 quadrillion tonnes. In 2008 steel products, from wire to ingots were selling for an average of $962 per tonne, so our cost of steel alone is $12.95 quintillion.

Now, how about getting that into space? According to the numbers I could find on the internet, it costs around $95 million to ship 1 tonne of materials into space, so that means we'll be cutting NASA a cheque for $12.79 septillion. (Remind me to order larger cheques from the bank please.)

Okay, so if we can cut out NASA we can basically save ourselves $13 septillion, dropping the total cost of a Death Star to a paltry $2 septillion. Now I think that's manageable folks -- so you start sending me your money, and I'll start building a strip club the rocketship.

Check out the first link for a much more in-depth look into all the costs associated with the project.

One Death Star for $15 Septillion? What a deal! [rickgold]
via
One Death Star for $15 Septillion?! [starwarsblog]

Thanks to Adam, who the Force is totally with.

Dec 29 2008 PEWtastic: Sweet Looking Wiimote-Gun Mod

Yep, somehow this WeeP5 is actually a fully functional Wiimote. Alternatively, a great way to miss a flight.

In case you're wondering: B button is the trigger, A button is under the foregrip, 1 and 2 are on opposite sides near the front, the D-pad and Wii remote are jutting out of the left side, and the +, -, and home buttons are on the top just above the ammo clip.

You'd think somebody with the technological savvy to mod an MP5-looking Wiimote would own a DVD player. I mean, Amélie on VHS? WTF! Seriously though, I loved the part where she led the blind man around.

Hit the jump for a much more questionable Wiimote-gun mod.

Continue Reading " PEWtastic: Sweet Looking Wiimote-Gun Mod "

Dec 4 2008 Red Shells: Guy Plays Mario Kart In Real Life

Some guy named Remi Gaillard decided it'd be a good idea to rock out with his go-kart out and play some Mario Kart in real life. This is the result. The graphics left a little something to be desired, but overall, awesome! Especially the *SPOILER ALERT* running away from the cops at the end. What -- don't blame me, you're the one that chose to read the spoiler before watching the movie. Jesus, exercise a little self control. Actually, just exercise a little period -- you look awful.

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Thanks to Tom, Jay, and Nicolas, any of which would have red-shelled that little bitch back to the NES.