Nov 17 2009 Bomb-Proof Wallpaper: But Is It Wolf-Proof?
Berry Plastics and the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers teamed up to develop X-Flex, a wallpaper with woven Kevlar strong enough to prevent bomb blasts from blowing all your shit up. Nice, but is it Big Bad Wolf proof? That mother can huff and puff!
X-Flex works so well that the armed forces are considering redecorating its army bases in Iraq and Afghanistan with the stuff. And, mindful of the commercial value, Berry Plastics is considering manufacturing a version for civilians
There's a video of the guys at Popular Science hitting the paper with a wrecking ball after the jump, which, at least according to my code of testing, didn't prove anything. IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE BOMB PROOF, WHO CARES IF IT'S WRECKING BALL PROOF? No, if you want real bomb-proof safety, you need to buy my anti-bomb bombs. Basically, when a bomb detonates it sets these ones off and the explosions are equal but different and everything is gravy. Trust me, I know fisics.
Hit it for the video.
Continue Reading " Bomb-Proof Wallpaper: But Is It Wolf-Proof? "
Nov 11 2009 That....Sounds Dangerous -- I Must Try It!
This is a 9-second video of an evil mad scientist pouring liquid nitrogen in his mouth and blowing out vapor. Why? Because he's mad, yo! Even worse than that tea-loving mother with the big hat.
Though it may look like this scientist is actually drinking the liquid nitrogen, he says that with a bit of practice, "it is easy not to swallow liquid nitrogen and make cool condensed vapor come out of the nostrils."
I would have drank it. I would have drank it and asked for another one. Bartender, another cold one. No, another REAAALLY cold one. You catch my drift? I'm talking about liquid nitrogen. And I want two of those little umbrellas and a plastic cutlass with cherries AND YOU BETTER NOT CHARGE ME FOR THEM. Now, get ready to call the paramedics.
How Scientists Chill Out [techeblog]
Thanks to naas, who once drank liquid gasoline trying to siphon my gas tank. That's what you get!
Sep 30 2009 OMG, It's Got A Bomb!: The Terrorist Teapot
Damn yeah two food related posts in a row. HUNGER CAN'T HOLD ME DOWN! Know what I'm sayin'? Jesus, I hope somebody does. Just one person even. I'm so tired of feeling alone. Anyway, a $39 terrorist teapot: the queen would not approve.
Think teapots are outdated and belong in your grandmother's kitchen? Think again. The Terrorist Teapot takes a threatening stance against anyone trying to mess with your perfectly brewed tea with a tea cosy that doubles as a balaclava. We can think of other uses for it... but you should probably reserve it for keeping the pot warm.
Personally, I love a spot of tea in the afternoon. And by tea I mean tea in the Jack Kerouac On The Road sense. I'm talking weed, damnit. Except I don't really smoke that shit because my mom is probably reading this (but I do so somebody get me high). Ha, what do you mean parents can read between parenthesis? LIES!
Thanks to Guido B, who enjoys his tea with a side of "it fell off tha back of a truck".
Jul 30 2009 You've Got To Quit, Smoking Will Kill Us All!
I swear, these public service announcements are getting a little out of hand. That said, here's the latest:
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Reading Geekologie makes you more attractive to the opposite sex. Also, the same sex. Every time you tell a friend about Geekologie a baby unicorn gets its horn and stabs the devil IN HIS CROTCH. Help poke holes in the devil's nads by telling as many people as possible about this great website. Thank you and have a Thirsty Thursday.
Extreme Anti-Smoking Ad [collegehumor]
Thanks to Rodger, steve and Dallas, who smoke rocks. Igneous is their favorite.
May 1 2009 iSnort App: All The Cool Kids Are Doing It
iSnort is a bootleg iPhone app that makes it appear as though you're cutting up coke and snorting it. Unfortunately, it's not even a real app. It's just a video that you have to choreograph your movements to (the iPhone's touchscreen doesn't respond to heavily abused credit cards or rolled up bills). That said, you can pick it up for £5 at their website. Or, put that money towards some real nose candy. Yeah, I'm talking that good shit. Model airplane glue.
TheiSnort
via
Perfect Cocaine Simulator Will Never Make It to the iPhone App Store [gizmodo]
Thanks to prestoner, who will be building his first gravity bong in no time. *sniff* They grow up so fast.
Mar 31 2009 Puff Puff Pass: USB Smokeless Cigarettes
Need a nicotine fix but can't leave your cube? No problem! Puff on a Health E-Cigarette from Thanko! Identical to pretty much ever other electronic cigarette out there, the $30 device "uses a heating element to vaporize a nicotine solution to supposedly give you a purer smoking experience", which is just fancy marketing jargon for, "short-circuit and burn your office to the ground". Trust me folks, I hold a Master's in Marketing. And also, Lovemaking. You see this? You see this move I'm doing right now? Senior thesis, baby.
Thanko's USB-powered Health E-Cigarettes sound healthy [engadget]
Thanks to Julian, who once got caught smoking a tampon in the boy's room because some upperclassmen told him it was a cigar.
Feb 10 2009 ZOMG, I'm Bidding: Mr. Miyagi's Stuff On eBay
Pat Morita, best known for portraying Mr. Miyagi in the Karate Kid series, passed away in 2005. And somewhere, in heaven, he's still catching flies with chopsticks. And somewhere, here on earth (Las Vegas, Nevada), his widow is selling his personal effects on eBay. This happens to be a Viking pipe puffed on by Mr. Miyagi himself -- I'm bidding!
YOU ARE BIDDING ON A GREAT PIECE FROM THE ESTATE OF LATE ACTOR PAT MORITA. I AM THE WIDOW AND TRUSTEE OF HIS ESTATE. I HAVE BEEN OFFERING FILM MEMORABILIA. AFTER MANY REQUESTS TO LIST SOME OF HIS PERSONAL EFFECTS I HAVE BEEN DOING SO RECENTLY.
OFFERED HERE IS A GENUINE MEERSCHAUM SMOKING PIPE WITH THE ORIGNAL FELT LINED CASE. THE PIPE WAS USED VERY LITTLE BY MR. MORITA. I PURCHASED IT AS A GIFT TO HIM FOR HIS BIRTHDAY ABOUT 10 YEARS AGO. HE ALWAYS USED TO SAY "THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE USED" BUT HE ENJOYED IT NEVER THE LESS.
Haha, "enjoyed it never the less" is right. She's talking about that reefer. You know, marijuana. And, in honor of Mr. Miyagi, I am buying this pipe, getting high, and waxing my car. Who's with me? Okay good, you bring the weed and elbow grease.
eBay Auction
and
Mr. Miyagi's other auctions
Thanks to Kyle, who allegedly owns Mr. Miyagi's headband. I'll fight you for it!
Jan 8 2009 Wow, Just Wow: Puff The Magic Dragon-Cake
Now THAT'S what I call a freaking cake. This massive firebreathing bitch was made for some Dungeon & Dragoners for a very special feast. A feast which included, but was not limited to: mozzarella sticks and corn dogs (see gallery after jump). Now that's what I call eating like a king. Or a handsome prince! HIYO. Anyway, this amazing piece of delicious was made by Mike's Amazing Cakes. Now who else here gets the feeling Mike sold his soul to an evil sorcerer to be granted the gift of cake? You think it was worth it? I personally wouldn't want to spend eternity being force-fed cake with my asshole sewn shut, but, you know, that's just me.
Hit the jump for the gallery and a link to an even more massive Flickr stream.
Continue Reading " Wow, Just Wow: Puff The Magic Dragon-Cake "
Dec 6 2008 Dude, Stop Boggarting The Stash: 2,700 Year Old Pot Found Buried In Gobi Desert Grave
Scientists unearthed two pounds of chronic in a Gobi Desert grave this week. The herb, which is believed to have been buried some 2,700 years ago, breaks the previous record for oldest marijuana stash by 2,700 years.
The size of seeds mixed in with the leaves, along with their color and other characteristics, indicate the marijuana came from a cultivated strain. Before the burial, someone had carefully picked out all of the male plant parts, which are less psychoactive, so Russo and his team believe there is little doubt as to why the cannabis was grown.
No shit there's little doubt why the cannabis was grown.
What is in question, however, is how the marijuana was administered, since no pipes or other objects associated with smoking were found in the grave.
Three words folks: up the ass. Try it sometime.
World's oldest marijuana stash totally busted [msnbc]
Thanks to Eric and Matty, who know to pass to the left.
