Jan 7 2009 Casting Call For New Discovery Science Channel Game Show 'Catch It Keep It'
Remember the last time I announced a casting call for a show? Did any of you actually apply? Is 'Super Testing' on the air? Has it started yet? I have no idea, I only watch educational programming. Sexeducational programming. HIYO! Porn basically. Anyway, here's the chance for you Geekologie readers to prove yourselves, and show the billions of [fact check this] Discovery Networks Science Channel viewers what you're made of!
Producers for a Discovery Science Game show are looking for contestants. Contestants can be a gonzo engineer/scientist or just a high-energy, creative, fun, builder!
They are looking for garage warriors (builders, scientists, inventors, engineers, carpenters, welders, mechanics, architects, etc...) who love to invent new gadgets, build robots, racing power tools, weld together bizarre machines that drive, fly, climb, shoot flames or launch projectiles.This Game Show is for thinkers, dreamers and doers, who are eager to let their inner MacGyvers be seen and ready to collaborate with a team of other builders to beat the clock in order to "save" the big prize!
Holy shit, I'd be perfect for this! I can hardly wait! I'm gonna be building the coolest stuff. All LEGO too! And there's a big prize involved! I love big prizes! Well, as long as they're not in the form of penises. Oh boy, oh boy! Do you think it's gold bullion? Cold hard cash? I don't know but I can hardly wait to find out! Pick me, pick me! Oh, wait, there's more.
Consumption of alcohol prohibited during challenges.
F*** that. It might just be the booze talking, but I love booze.
Dec 9 2008 Pentagon PEWing For Guided Bullet Tech
The Pentagon is tossing $22 million at developing guided bullet technology that would enable a bullet to change course midflight because it wasn't shot right first in the first place, the wind changed, or the head you were aiming at moved. *closing blinds* Greeeaaaaat.
Darpa won't say, publicly, how far, how long and how accurate they want the new bullets to be -- all that information is classified. But they will say that Exacto should contain a next-gen scope, a guidance system that provides information to direct the projectile, an "actively controlled .50-caliber projectile that uses this information for real-time directional flight control," and a rifle. "Technologies of interest may include: fin-stabilized projectiles, spin-stabilized projectiles, internal and/or external aero-actuation control methods, projectile guidance technologies, tamper proofing, small stable power supplies, and advanced sighting, optical resolution and clarity technologies."
Hey Darpa, I hate to ruin the party, but guided bullets already exist. They're called missiles. Yeah, they're laser guided and they shoot out of my penis. PEW on this, moneywasters! Oh, just a minute. *PSSH* Oh -- *PSSSSHHH* Aaaahh -- *PSSSSSHOOOOOOOOW!!*
Pentagon Shoots $22 Million Into Guided-Bullet Tech [wired]
Thanks to Erick, who came up with that PEW *WHOOSH* PEW thing, and never misses the urinal.
Jun 5 2008 Magnetic Accelerator Kit Fires Ball Bearings
The $30 Magnetic Accelerator from Thinkgeek uses black magic to launch ball bearings at your roommate when he refuses to fetch you a beer from the fridge even though he's closer. The kit can be assembled in just a few minutes and requires no glue (so there's little chance of bonding your hand to your genitals again). "Set the metal ball at the end of the track and watch as the energy transfers and multiplies down the track of magnets and metal balls until finally the last ball zooms off." Whee, what fun -- I love zooming balls, provided they're not my roomate's buzzing in for a teabag because I passed out on the couch. Seriously, you had your fun, now take the pictures off Facebook.
Hit the jump for a short video of the weapon in action.
teabagging the roomie!
In this photo: The Geekologie Writer (photos), my balls (photos)
Added May 29, 2008
Continue Reading " Magnetic Accelerator Kit Fires Ball Bearings "
Mar 17 2008 Net Gun Is Probably Safer Than A Taser
The Net-2000 Shooting Net Rod uses compressed air to launch a 52 square foot net at perps (or friends, tigers, etc.). The net can travel approximately 50 feet, so you can be a safe distance away (read: out of stabbing range) and still use the device. They sell for $419, but the net can be reinserted into the device and fired repeatedly, so it's got lots of replay value. Now being the intrepid reporter that I am I decided to track down Spiderman and see what he thought about the new net-slinging device. The interview follows.
Geekologie: So, Spidey. Do you mind if I call you Spidey? (Spiderman nods) Good. Have you seen this new net-gun they've got out?
Spiderman: No.
Geekologie: Well check it out. (plays Youtube video) Do you think this will affect your crime-fighting business at all?
Spiderman: Shit.
Geekologie: Is that a yes?
Spiderman: Shit.
Geekologie: Thank you for your time.
A close-up picture and a video of the gun in action after the jump.
