Nov 30 2008 Gay Penguins Steal Eggs From Straight Couples, Get Proposition 8'ed By Zoo

Two gay penguins at Polar Land in Harbin, China have been stealthily stealing eggs from straight couples and replacing them with rocks. Brilliant!

But the deception has been noticed by other penguins at the zoo, who have ostracized the gay couple from their group. Now keepers have decided to segregate the pair of three-year-old male birds to avoid disrupting the rest of the community during the hatching season.

"One of the responsibilities of being a male adult is looking after the eggs. Despite this being a biological impossibility for this couple, the natural desire is still there," a keeper told the Austrian Times newspaper.

"It's not discrimination. We have to fence them separately, otherwise the whole group will be disturbed during hatching time," he added.

Not discrimination my ass. Next thing you know the couple won't even be allowed to marry. Seriously, I have had it up to here *raising arm as high over head as possible* with this nonsense. Penguins are people too, you know? And wow, my pits smell like chili-dogs with lots of chopped onion. F***ing love those things. Gay penguins too. Pittsburgh, eh, not so much.

Gay penguins steal eggs from straight couples [telegraph]

Thanks to Matt, who allegedly saw a turtle threesome at the zoo once.

Oct 29 2008 Why Didn't I Think Of That?: Guy Trying To Sell Wife Online UPDATE: New Lower Price!

A Romanian man genius is trying to sell his 25-year old wife online. Why? Because that's the best goddamn idea I've ever heard, that's why.

Alex Cretu, 20, who lives in Bucharest, hoped to get around $8 million but has lowered his price to $6,000 for a quick sale. His ad on www.okazii.ro reads: "Wife for sale. Model 1983, good condition. Full option, nice suspensions, spacious boot, second owner. Price is negotiable, comes with three-year-old and five-year-old accessories. Seriousness demanded."

Alex says he placed his ad on the site partly because he had got fed up of his wife nagging him all of the time and partly as a joke.

Partly as a joke my ass.

Romanian man puts wife up for sale [propeller]

Thanks to Pat, who I wish had sent this tip a year ago.