Nov 5 2009 That Can't Be Good For His Knees: DS Player

This man, who could be any of us (BUT TOTALLY ISN'T ME, I SWEAR) was caught playing a demo Nintendo DS at Wal-Mart on his knees. DS'er, on his knees *snicker* ENOUGH -- this is not the time for your pervy laughter! This IS the time to take up a collection and get this poor bastard a DS. And, if there's anything left over, Rogaine and a spray tan.

World Of Walmart [peopleofwalmart]

Thanks to Closet Nerd, who once got caught taking whippits in the dairy isle AND WHO CAN BLAME HIM?!

Oct 29 2009 I See You!: 8x Zoom Case For Nintendo DSi

Want an 8x zoom lens for your DSi because you're secretly a spy? Me neither. Want an 8x zoom lens for your DSi because you're in love with the receptionist at the free clinic and you want to candidly take pictures of her? You've got problems. But if you've also got $25 you can have the Nyko DSi Zoom Case, a case and lens that attach to your DSi and allow up to 8x zoom. Plus, it's super inconspicuous. Goodbye bow tie camera!

Hit the jump for a shot of it's zooming capabilities and all the accessories.

Continue Reading " I See You!: 8x Zoom Case For Nintendo DSi "

Oct 11 2009 Backwards!: NES Cartridge Plays Games

We've seen Nintendos stuffed into NES cartridges before, but never with such a quality final product.

My nesP is basically a noname china brand portable media player, with the advantage of being able to play nes roms, and a nes controller hacked to the controls....Well it worked perfect, it was like it was made to fit, I didn't use any hot glue or anything other than some double sided tape to hold the battery in place. It's a really tight fit though. It's got 4gb built in memory, with a sd card slot in the inside so you could expand the memory if needed, and not only does it play nes games, but it also plays gameboy and gameboy color roms as well. 2.8" TFT LCD, built-in rechargeable lithium battery, Video player, MP3 player, FM radio, Picture viewer, Audio recorder, it's got a camera and video camera (but I disabled them to fit in the case), built in speaker, and the best part... TV-OUT !!! so you can play on the big screen!

I would rock that. Of course, I would rock a lot of things. Including, but not limited to: your ass at some Powerstone 2 on Dreamcast! Bring it, chumps!

Several shots of the innards and a video (extra points for being Youtube user 'robotswillkillyou') of the console in action after the jump.

Continue Reading " Backwards!: NES Cartridge Plays Games "

Aug 30 2009 Dual Screen Laptops Here Before Christmas (You Hear That, Santa? You Fat Bastard You)

So apparently the dual 15.4" screened gGscreen Spacebook will be released in time for Christmas this year. Also, the elves I've been holding hostage. BUT ONLY IF SANTA MEETS MY DEMANDS.

The Alaska based company, started by Gordon Stewart (yep, that is where the G in gScreen comes from), is aiming its dual screen laptops at professional designers, filmmakers, photographers and really anyone who can't live without a dual screen for everyday productivity...The chassis (which we expect is at least 12 pounds) is built around the 15.4 inch screen (though the first units that come to market will have 16-inch or 17-inch screens) and its twin, identically sized screen slides out from behind the first using a uniquely designed sliding mechanism.

They will run Windows 7 and be powered by Intel Core 2 Duo processors, 4GB of RAM and high-end Nvidia GF900M GT discrete graphics. The plan is for fast 7,200 RPM hard drives and six or nine-cell batteries...."It is absolutely the opposite of a netbook," he told us. Yea that is no kidding with a price tag that he is hoping to keep under $3,000.

Damn! 30" of screen real estate, that's a lot. This thing isn't even a laptop any more. It's a muffintop. ZING!

GScreen's Dual-Screen Spacebook Coming Soon(ish) [gizmodo]

Thanks to Melissa, Mark and Mike, whose names all begin with the letter M. What? I NOTICE THESE THINGS! Did you get your hair cut? All of them, good one.

Jun 1 2009 Boom Shacka Lacka!: The New PSP Go

This is the new PSP. It's called the PSP Go. You know, because it's portable. It may or may not come preloaded with porn. Specs? I has them:

* 3.8-inch display (resolution is undisclosed)
* 43 percent lighter than the PSP-3000
* 16GB of Flash storage
* Bluetooth built-in; supports handset tethering and BT headsets
* No UMD drive
* Memory Stick Micro slot
* New Gran Turismo, Little Big Planet and new Metal Gear Solid (!) on the way
* Full PlayStation Network support (movie and TV rentals / purchases)
* Integration with PlayStation 3 (works the same as the PSP-3000 does)
* Sony views each of its products as "10-year lifecycle products," so the PSP "needs to live on."

Well, what do you think? I like the sliding feature, that's not necessary. Also, PSP Go -- really? I hope nobody got paid to come up with that. Because it's stupid. I would have gone with PSP You Can Take It With You.

Sony's PSP Go leaks out before E3, is obviously a go [engadget]

Thanks to obi jwan and Rik, who don't need portable gaming devices because they only play mind games.

May 17 2009 XBox 360/Zune Mashup Device Coming?

Is Microsoft working on a device that combines functionality of the XBox 360 and Zune? I don't even know what the hell that would be, but maybe.

The project, codenamed "xYz," is said to feature a WVGA touchscreen and a way to play music and movies on both the device as well as the Xbox 360. Basically, it's going to be a connected handheld gaming system with rich multimedia features.

Eh. Also, "xYz" -- what a horrible codename. I can already think of like a million better ones. Including, and pretty much limited to, "Project Zune Liquidation".

xYz handheld rumored to combine Xbox 360 and Zune [dvice]

Apr 15 2009 6-Year Old Finds Pron On New PSP, Cries

A six-year old found a bunch of nudey pictures on the PSP his mother purchased for him from Walmart and got all upset about it and cried to his mommy.

Tamatha said she found a memory card inside the PSP containing hundreds of pornographic pictures. She claimed it's not hers and it was in the PSP before she opened the box.

She then called the store wanting to speak with a manager about the problem. "I explained the situation and his response was, 'well, bring the machine down and we'll let your son pick out a new game,'" she said. "And I was like, no I don't think you heard what I said."

Tamatha is demanding a new gaming system, apology, and written promise her son won't grow up to be gay. Good luck with that Tamatha, but I've got news for you: he's been that way since birth. I mean, he cried when he saw a naked woman. What? Well, yeah, but I only do it sometimes.

Mom Finds Porn on New PSP [myfoxboston]

Thanks to Chris and Asiantom, who would have felt like they just won the fapping lottery.

Apr 8 2009 It Was Frickin' Huge: 54,324 Piece LEGO DSi

LEGO artist Sean Kenney was commissioned by Nintendo of America to build a giant DSi for display at the Nintendo World Store in NYC. So that's what he did. And here it is, in all it's 54,324 piece glory. Sadly, it doesn't work, which means that it's forever frozen with that picture of a cat on it. Which, while cute, is nowhere near as cute as my cat. Isn't that right, Mr. Whiskers? I swear, you are such a cutie with a booty -- come give daddy kissies! No, I didn't say asshole my face, I said kissies!

Hit the jump for a bunch of closeups and a 45-second time-lapse video of the build.

Continue Reading " It Was Frickin' Huge: 54,324 Piece LEGO DSi "

Apr 2 2009 Game Timer Keeps DS'ing Addiction In Check

Snap -- you just got double entendre'd, son! Moving on. The Health Control Game Timer shuts down your Nintendo DS if you've been playing for too long. How long is too long? Apparently 30, 60, 90 or 120 minutes.

The device also features a distance sensor that will flash a red light when your face gets too close to the screen during those unusually intense gaming sessions.

The highly questionable piece of shit costs $40 and won't work to curb your problem whatsoever. If you really have a gaming addiction you'll either A) never buy one, B) turn the system back on and keep playing for another 2 hours, or 3) pull the device out and Hulk smash it to bits. I mean, it's not liked it's chained to the DS or anything. And, haha, speaking of not being chained to things -- I stole your bike! Now, check out this sick jump I've been working on. *WICKA-POW* Ladies, consider yourself pregnant.

Heatlh Control Game Timer puts digital leash on Nintendo DS fanatics [dvice]

Nov 3 2008 How To Get Hit By A Bus: The Immersion Scarf

Ooooh, I like that tie. The Immersion Scarf is basically a smaller version of a whatever the hell you'd call this thing. But, instead of being used in conjunction with a computer, it was designed for use with cell phones and portable gaming systems. And no so much for warmth and privacy as much as anti-glare and privacy. So yeah, totally different. Nope, no idea theft going on here at all. And also, no plagiarism. Just kidding, I copy/pasted this shit from your mom's blog. Funny lady!

Hit the jump for a couple more pictures.

Continue Reading " How To Get Hit By A Bus: The Immersion Scarf "

Sep 19 2008 Guy Makes Good Looking Portable N64

We've seen all sorts of portable console mods here on Geekologie, including the good, the wooden, and the made by a third-grader. And now, Benheck forum user hailrazer went and made himself a nice little portable Nintendo 64. Good looking, sleetblade, I wouldn't mind having one myself. Can you say Ocarina of Time while driving? I can, "Ocarina of Time while *CRASH* oh God, help.

Hit the jump for two more pics of the pretty little thing.

Continue Reading " Guy Makes Good Looking Portable N64 "

Jun 27 2008 Boom Arm Starbase Workstation Allows You To Work Comfortably From Bed, Recliner, Can

The Starbase Alpha Boom Boom Room Workstation Arm thingy is ridiculously named and holds either a laptop or LCD monitor while you're playing with yourself in bed or asleep on the can.

Workstations available for use with either a Laptop computer(ST-03) or for use with an LCD Flat screen monitor(ST-04).

Key Benefits:
Use your computer in comfort
Use your computer from non-traditional places
Portable take it where you need it.

Both cost about $300 and you'll be ridiculed if you ever use one. Just like I was after posing for that picture there. And before you ask, yes, those are my pink sheets, and no, that's not a boner. Those are my toes. Wait -- I take that back. Freakin' huge.

Never get out of bed to blog with the Boom Arm Starbase Workstation [bbgadgets]

May 1 2008 Portable NES Gaming Systems On eBay

Still got a bunch of old NES cartridges lying around? Want to play them while you're on family car trips instead of listening to your mom and stepdad bicker over whether you're stopping at Arby's or McDonalds for lunch? If so, you may be interested in the FC Mobile console (or the solar-powered portable emulator). It plays the original NES cartridges and is available on eBay for $40-$50.

Take your NES games on the road with the FC Mobile Console. Featuring a 2.4" LCD screen and stereo speakers, you can recreate your NES experience right in the palm of your hand with the FC Mobile Console. Want to show off your gaming skills to your friends while you play? The FC Mobile Console supports a TV output connector so that you can make or break your NES experience right on your TV screen.

That's what I'm talking about. I love "showing off my gaming skills to my friends while I play". Hey guys, check this out -- I'm playing Super Mario 3. Now watch, I'm gonna fall off this platform into a pit and die. HA, did you see that shit!? I totally owned that pit, didn't I? Hell f'ing yeah I did -- they're called skills folks, and I've got tons of them. Now somebody tell my mom to bring us the Sunny-D.

eBay Auctions
via
fc mobile console plays original nes carts [technabob]

Apr 22 2008 NES Stuffed Into Super Mario Bros. Cartridge

If you can make a NES controller mouse, and stuff a whole system into a shoe, then stuffing one into a game cartridge is clearly the next step (don't question my foolproof logic). And that's exactly what someone did (well, they actually put a Nintendo on a chip (NOAC) in there). As you can see it's got everything it needs to be a fully functional Nintendo. But the real question is this: If you try jamming this cartridge into another NES does it tear a gaping hole into the video game dimension and release retro gaming bosses to wreak havoc on our planet? My guess is yes. And I'm all for it if it means I stand a chance with Zelda. It's not that her doppelganger wasn't awesome in the sack or anything, it's just that one of her pointy ears came off while we were doing it. Talk about awkward.

nes system built into game cartridge [technabob]

Thanks to Andrew, who once stuffed a pinball machine into a grain of salt, for the tip

Mar 20 2008 Guitar Hero For DS Looks, Um, Something

So this is how Guitar Hero: On Tour will be played on the Nintendo DS. By strumming your stylus on the touchscreen and mashing buttons on a fretboard attachment. You know, I really think that this version of the game is getting dangerously close to playing real guitar. The game is supposed to ship sometime this summer and it better have an option to flip the screen or something so you can play left-handed. Because otherwise it proves my sneaking suspicion that Activision is run by a bunch of righty fascists.

UPDATE: Questionable commercial added after the jump.

Continue Reading " Guitar Hero For DS Looks, Um, Something "

Jan 25 2008 It's About Time: A Microwave On The Go

Phil Davis is an inventor. An inventor with a dream. An inventor with a dream of a microwave in the bathroom.

Davis said he came up with the idea for the I-Wave when he was thinking about using a hot towel on his face while in the bathroom, and asked himself why a microwave can't be in the bathroom and bedroom.

Ah yes, the old microwave in the bathroom conundrum. Been There Phil, been there. You're on the right track, but you need a mini-fridge/freezer attachment as well, or it's pointless. A microwave in the bathroom is only as good as the number of Pizza Bites and Hot Pockets you have within arm's reach of the john. *Ding* Oh, gotta go -- breakfast biscuit's ready.

iWave Cube [sharperimage]

Thanks to Melissa, who can cook me breakfast anyday, for the tip

Jan 22 2008 Powerstick USB Charger Is Small, Tempting

The Powerstick is a little 40 gram device designed to recharge your gadgets when they run out of juice (not the fruit variety, I'm talking power here). It fully recharges via USB in 90 minutes and is then ready to charge your mobile devices. "It can charge a portable device as fast as a wall charger can, and will in theory double the battery life of your phone, PDA or MP3 player. It even includes 9 connectors covering everything from Nokia, Sony Ericsson, LG, Motorola, Blackberry and Samsung phones to the iPod and even the iPhone." The thing costs $70 and has a nice little gas gauge style power meter on top. A nice touch if I do say so myself. Speaking of nice touches, I need a massage. First one to come over with some scented massage oils wins the annual "Give The Geekologie Writer A Massage" contest. Winner takes home a mysterious rash and any unused oils.

Powerstick Portable USB Charger [ohgizmo]

Jan 16 2008 I'm No Perv, I Swear!: Portable Subway Straps

Well I'm sure you all know about the subway groping problem that Japan has. If not, Japan has a problem with men playing grab-ass (with women) on the subway. Well now there's a solution for Japanese men aiming to keep a clean reputation -- portable subway straps (525 yen, ~$5). What you do is, uh, hold the thing -- that way women won't accuse you of touching them because you're holding on to a giant plastic door knocker. I recommend getting two just to be safe. Because while the guy on the far right of the picture is clearly not doing any groping with his right hand, I'm pretty sure his left is knuckle deep in ass. But to his credit, it's probably his own.

Portable subway strap shows you're no groper [pinktentacle]

Jan 16 2008 Handpresso: For (Cold) Espresso Anywhere

The Handpresso is what is born when a rogue bike pump makes its way into your house from the garage and humps your coffee maker. It's a portable espresso machine -- all you need is a little coffee pod filter thing and some water. Where you get hot water on the go is a mystery to me, unless you tote a thermos around all the time. The unit costs 99€ (~$145) and could be worth it if you're a die-hard espresso fanatic that can't go 30 minutes without a fix. I'll pass, because I don't like espresso due to the caffeine in it. Caffeine, after all, is a drug -- and drugs are bad. Now a portable still for making moonshine -- that my friends, would be something worth considering.

Two videos of the thing after the jump. But a warning: the second is a little suggestive. And by 'a little suggestive' I mean it suggests that espresso comes out of a man's penis in a movie theater.

Continue Reading " Handpresso: For (Cold) Espresso Anywhere "

Jan 8 2008 Genesis Portable Plays Some Old Games

The SEGA Mega Drive (Genesis) Portable is a little handheld system that plays some of your favorite Genesis games from yesteryear. It costs $40 and comes preloaded with 20 games including Kid Chameleon, Sonic and Knuckles, Alex Kidd, Ecco the Dolphin, Altered Beast, and Golden Axe. It features a backlight screen and comes with composite cables in case you want to play on a television. No word if there will be any expansions, but whatever. The reviews of the unit are pretty high, so I may drop two Hamiltons on it. What's that -- Hamilton is on the $10 and not the $20? Well who the hell is on the $20 then, is it Ford? Jackson, huh? Like Michael? Oh, of course, president Jackson. Samuel right?

sega genesis portable: get yoru retro jollies on the run [technabob]