Aug 10 2009 Bad Idea: Creepy Surgical Masks For Dentists
How would you like that nightmare standing above you with a drill in its hand? You wouldn't, would you? My gums are bleeding just thinking about it.
Clever surgical masks with funny cartoon mouths were sent to dentists in Hamburg, Germany. The goal was to lighten up a visit to the dentist for the kids and everyone else, as well as to promote Colgate Smiles Kids toothbrushes.
Honestly, I'd rather knock all my teeth out with a cinderblock than face a dentist wearing a mask like that AND I DON'T CARE HOW MUCH NITROUS YOU GIVE ME. I'll tell you what, give me a take-home tank and you've got a deal. Okay now I -- I have two fingers.
Hit the jump for several more shots of a terrible idea.
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Mar 23 2009 At Least He Was Honest: Internet Scam Fail
I can't even count the number of times I've been contacted by Nigerian princes to help move their money out of the country. Unfortunately, I don't keep a bank account because that's just another way the man tries to keep tabs on my brothel me on a short leash. Anyway, I like how the scammer comes out of character at the end with a "thanks man". That was great. Not as great as my love for you, but I have a big heart. And hands. Hey, did you know if your hand is bigger than your face you'll die young? It's true -- you should try it. *SMACK-A-POW* Wow, I can't believe you fell for that. Ha, or when I told you I loved you.
Thanks to Joemo, who once conned an old lady out of her retirement by having sex with her. Gross, Joemo.
Jan 27 2009 The Tampon Mona Lisa For Sale On eBay
Tampon Mona Lisa (AKA Bleeding Lisa, AKA Bitching and Moaning Lisa) is just that, a picture of Mona Lisa with a bunch of tampons glued on. It's like a middle school art class/sex ed mashup gone horribly wrong.
TAMPON MONA LISA uses an enlarged photocopy of Mona's face, bodice, and hands, the only areas that show her skin in DaVinci's original. Her hair and her clothing are represented in mosaic fashion by approximately 200 tampons. Some of the tampons have the strings attached, showing up as strands of hair or threads on her dress.
Whatever. The bidding starts at a ridiculous $2,600 and if anybody is interested I'll run out to CVS right now and make one even bigger. I'm talking those super absorbent joints. Shit, I may even throw in a few pads and an adult diaper.
Hit the jump for a closeup.
