Sep 3 2009 'Gravity Tractor' May Prevent Us From Going Out Like The Dinosaurs (Read: In Style)
Apparently some people are worried that the earth might get struck by an asteroid at some point in time and screw up humankind's plans to eff this world up on our own. Yeah -- who invited you, asteroid?! So what do we do? Build a Gravity Tractor (suck it, John Deere!) to avert certain death. Bitchin'.
NASA's Near Earth Object program currently has 145 potentially hazardous asteroids on its list out of 1,062 objects larger than one kilometer in diameter, and 6,292 total discovered objects. What's all that mean? Well, that there's a lot of stuff out there that could potentially impact our planet -- some of it pretty big.
So instead of sending shuttle crews up at the last minute to blow an approaching asteroid up, British astronomers at the Astrophysics Research Centre are planning to build a 10-ton "gravity tractor" spacecraft that will influence the object's trajectory. The process would take some time -- a craft would have to be launched 15 years in advance to really have an effect -- but, once the tractor arrives, it'd hover close by an asteroid and gently guide it along a different path.
Listen NASA, I know we've had our differences in the past (I never touched that alien!), but I would like to volunteer to drive the Gravity Tractor. I have every reason to believe I'd be the perfect candidate: I have mowed my parents' yard several times and I only hit the fence twice and ran over a sprinkler. Also, I have a natural passion for heavy machinery, especially after drinking. You think about it.
Britain plans 'gravity tractor' to protect Earth from asteroids [dvice]
Apr 22 2009 Scientists Find Watery, Earth-Like Planet?
Earth Day Fools! Oh, wait, no. Apparently this is real, and only 20.5 light-years away! Ladies and gentlemen -- start your rocket engines. PSSSSHOOOOOOOOW! PEW PEW.
The Gliese 581 planetary system now has four known planets, with masses of about 1.9 (planet e, left in the foreground), 16 (planet b, nearest to the star), 5 (planet c, center), and 7 Earth-masses (planet d, with the bluish colour).
Michel Mayor, a well-known exoplanet researcher from the Geneva Observatory, announced the find today. The planet, "e," in the famous system Gliese 581, is only about twice the mass of our Earth. The team also refined the orbit of the planet Gliese 581 d, first discovered in 2007, placing it well within the habitable zone, where liquid water oceans could exist.
Planet Gliese 581 d, is that really the best they could do? GIVE IT A REAL DAMN NAME ALREADY. I propose Waterworld. And speaking of which, that was a hell of a movie, was it not? Oh, I'm getting a "no" from The IWatchStuff Writer. But he had gills, man, gills!
Nearly Earth-sized Planet, Possible Watery World Spotted Near Another Star [universetoday]
Thanks to Morgana, who, for an Earth-related tip on Earth Day, wins a free trip to Gliese 581 d, just as soon I finish my rocketship.
Feb 26 2009 I Knew It!: Violent Video Games Helps Prepare Children For The Coming Apocalypse
This is an Onion News roundtable discussion on the benefit of children playing violent video games. And as I suspected, violent games do, in fact, prepare the world's youth for the coming apocalypse.
Playing video games all day, alone and friendless, is simply the best way we have to prepare our children for a life of solitude in a barren wasteland.
Finally, somebody speaking some sense. So fret not, parents, buying your children violent video games might just provide them with the know-how they need to survive in the the future. Or, I dunno, bring a gun to school. Either one.
Are Violent Video Games Adequately Preparing Children For The Apocalypse? [theonion]
Thanks to Mister Tiddles, who I think might be a cat.
Jan 29 2009 Interplanetary Delight: A Saturn Cake
This is probably the best looking cake we've posted here on Geekologie, and it comes to us all thanks to loyal Geekologie Reader, Jay, who had this to say about it:
I made a saturn cake, I can send pics -J
Damn that thing looks like it was baked full of win, am I right? Of course I am, I didn't take a four week correspondence course in cakes for nothing. I took it to meet women. And let me tell you -- no. But I haven't given up, I'm gonna try that art one next -- the one where you have to draw a picture of a turtle on your application. I like turtles!
Hit the jump for a picture of the cake in it's natural habitat.
Nov 14 2008 First Peek At Another Planetary System!
That's right folks, this is the first photo (I have no idea what this was then), taken by the Hubble Space Telescope, of a planet orbiting another star. "[The picture] shows a planet orbiting the bright southern star Fomalhaut, located 25 light-years away in the constellation Piscis Australis." Hit the jump for another pictures of a planetary system 130 light-years away. That Hubble must have some camera! And, wait a minute -- THAT'S NOT A PLANET, THAT'S THE EYE OF SAURON! We're all dead! But, before I go, where'd that sexy little Gollum run off to?
Hit it for a couple more photos.
Continue Reading " First Peek At Another Planetary System! "
Sep 4 2008 This Is What Would Happen...
If a large meteor hit earth because Superman is dead or we couldn't blow it up like in that movie Armageddon which totally did not make me cry when I watched it.
Watch the video for death and destruction set to Pink Floyd, sweet!
CG Animation Shows What Happens When Large Meteor Hits Earth [techeblog]
Aug 15 2008 Some Maroons Still Believe The Earth Is Flat
Idiots in the Flat Earth Society are still convinced the world is flat and lead-based paint is part of a well-balanced diet.
People are definitely prejudiced against flat-Earthers," Tennessee-based computer scientist and society member John Davis tells the BBC. "Many use the term 'flat-Earther' as a term of abuse, and with connotations that imply blind faith, ignorance or even anti-intellectualism."
Don't breed!
"The Earth is, more or less, a disc," states James McIntyre, a Briton who helps run the Flat Earth Society's Web site. "Obviously it isn't perfectly flat, thanks to geological phenomena like hills and valleys. It is around 24,900 miles in diameter.""The North Pole is central, and Antarctica comprises the entire circumference of the Earth," explains McIntyre. "Circumnavigation is a case of traveling in a very broad circle across the surface of the Earth."
Flat Earthers also believe the moon landing and photos of earth from space were faked, which is only true in the case of the moon landing. But what I don't get is: if Antarctica surrounds the entire circumference of the earth, what's on the other side of that? Is it all ice? Is it candy land? Is it the dark side of the earth? Does my doppelgänger live there? Do you think he blogs too? If I meet him will I really die? Can I dig a hole to the other side and find out? Will you help? Come on, I'll show you my tits.
Believers In Flat Earth Not About to Change Minds [foxnews]
Thanks to Sam, who's smart enough to know the world is a cone.
Jul 18 2008 Moon Transits Earth: Time-Lapse Video Caught From A Cool 31 Million Miles Away
This is a time-lapse video taken by NASA's EPOXI spacecraft from 31 million miles. It's pretty awe-inspiring. Halfway through the moon makes an appearance. You know, just to say what's up. In other lunar news: tonight's a full moon, so go check that shit out. But remember: If it's hairy, you're probably standing on the bathroom sink with your head between your legs, staring at your own ass in the mirror. Go outside.
HOLY FRAK! Moon transits Earth! [discover]
Jul 18 2008 Eye Candy: More Chinese Anti-Terrorism Exercises For The Olympics, With Captions!
Remember the picture of the Chinese military on Segways as part of an anti-terrorism exercise? Well it turns out there's a whole bunch more of them performing various drills. And I've posted them here for your viewing pleasure. This is one of the group practicing their synchronized flailing routine.
Hit the jump for 7 more, with captions!
