Nov 1 2009 Stay Fresh: Mad Muffin Beyond Bagel Dome

The Bagel Dome (Dome Dome Dome) is a $40 battery powered vacuum dome made to keep bagels and other oxygen-hating perishables fresh (JUST USE A DYSON, GOD). I contacted the manufacturer and the lady on the phone said it also works for donuts but I have my doubts. Which is exactly why I just invented the Donut Dome, which isn't just a Bagel Dome with 'Doughnut Dome' scratched into the plastic EXCEPT IT IS BECAUSE I'M A GENIUS INVENTOR. I also discover elements and name them after my pets! Rutherfordium? That was me. Great dog.

The Bagel Dome: I'd buy it just based on the name [dvice]

Oct 17 2009 Europa Has Enough Oxygen To Support Life?

So apparently one of Jupiter's moons, Europa, might have enough oxygen to support life. Well that's cool BECAUSE I'M TOTALLY MOVING THERE. Who's with me? You better shower!

The global ocean on Jupiter's moon Europa contains about twice the liquid water of all the Earth's oceans combined. New research suggests that there may be plenty of oxygen available in that ocean to support life, a hundred times more oxygen than previously estimated.

The chances for life there have been uncertain, because Europa's ocean lies beneath several miles of ice, which separates it from the production of oxygen at the surface by energetic charged particles (similar to cosmic rays). Without oxygen, life could conceivably exist at hot springs in the ocean floor using exotic metabolic chemistries, based on sulfur or the production of methane. However, it is not certain whether the ocean floor actually would provide the conditions for such life.

Hell yeah, Europa -- I've always wanted to visit Holland! Do they really wear those wooden shoes?

Jupiter's Moon Europa Has Enough Oxygen For Life [physorg]

Thanks to Kelly, who can come with me provided she steer the spaceship while I get drunk and puke out a porthole.

Sep 17 2009 How To Light A Grill With Liquid Oxygen

First of all, I'm not convinced liquid oxygen is real because, if it is, why can't I breath underwater? I want a merman, damnit. But if it is real, this is a video of Theo Gray lighting a charcoal grill with the stuff. Apparently it's dangerous, but I find it hard to believe. I mean, it's just a liquid. Jesus, it's not like I just ate and wanna go swimming in the stuff.

Lighting a Grill with Liquid Oxygen Is the Opposite of Safe [gizmodo]

Thanks to Van, who may or may not house a real husky bastard down by the river.

Aug 10 2009 Billy Mays Was OxyCleaning His Nostrils?

It is being reported that famous TV pitchman Billy Mays may have died as a result of drug use. Namely, cocaine. The white horse.

An official autopsy report released Friday found that cocaine use contributed to the heart disease that suddenly killed TV pitchman Billy Mays in June, but his family called the finding "speculative" and considered getting an independent look at the results.

The medical examiner "concluded that cocaine use caused or contributed to the development of his heart disease, and thereby contributed to his death," the office said in a press release.

BILLY MAYS WAS SNORTING THAT NOSE CLEANIN' CANDY! Do you think he was huffing Orange Glo too? Because I did once, and let me tell you -- KABOOM! See what I did there? Because I can do that all night. And by that I mean it (my Mexican boner pills just arrived). Cleaning ladies?

Autopsy: Cocaine contributed to Billy Mays' death [yahoonews]

Thanks to Jason, who once drank a bottle of Orange Glo and had the best night ever. Hospitals are fun!

Apr 16 2009 Bacon Torch Burns Hot, Hot Water Burn Baby

Some guy went and built a thermal lance (cutting torch) that runs on pure oxygen and the fat from bacon (well, prosciutto). As you can see from the picture, the 5,000°F grease-flame is hot enough to burn through a pan, and straight to our hearts. *swoon*

A thermal lance, typically made of iron instead of bacon, is used to cut up scrap metal and rescue people from collapsed buildings. It works by blowing pure oxygen gas through a pipe packed with iron and magnesium rods. These metals are surprisingly flammable in pure oxygen, releasing a huge amount of heat as they are consumed. The result is a jet of superheated iron plasma coming out of the end of the pipe. For sheer destructive force, few tools match a thermal lance. But iron isn't the only thing that's flammable in a stream of pure oxygen.

There's a video after the jump that explains how he made it, but I'm not into following directions so I just glue-sticked a bunch of bacon to grandma's oxygen mask. Here goes nothin'! *FWOOOSH!* Uh-oh, looks like I'm gonna need another grandma. Quick -- to the old folks home before my parents get back!

Hit the jump for an instructional video.

Continue Reading " Bacon Torch Burns Hot, Hot Water Burn Baby "

Feb 5 2009 Have You Ever Wondered How Much It Would Cost To Build Your Own Death Star? Hint: I Didn't Even Know That Was A Real Number

Let's face it, we all want our own Death Star. But how much would it actually cost to build one, today? Well, a lot. Try 15 septillion dollars. That's $15,602,022,489,829,821,422,840,226! Ladies and gentlemen, we may have to settle for the half-sized model.

(The Death Star has) a volume of 17.16 quadrillion cubic meters. At 1/10 volume, we'll need 1.71 Quadrillion cubic meters of steel, weighing in at 134 quadrillion tonnes. In 2008 steel products, from wire to ingots were selling for an average of $962 per tonne, so our cost of steel alone is $12.95 quintillion.

Now, how about getting that into space? According to the numbers I could find on the internet, it costs around $95 million to ship 1 tonne of materials into space, so that means we'll be cutting NASA a cheque for $12.79 septillion. (Remind me to order larger cheques from the bank please.)

Okay, so if we can cut out NASA we can basically save ourselves $13 septillion, dropping the total cost of a Death Star to a paltry $2 septillion. Now I think that's manageable folks -- so you start sending me your money, and I'll start building a strip club the rocketship.

Check out the first link for a much more in-depth look into all the costs associated with the project.

One Death Star for $15 Septillion? What a deal! [rickgold]
via
One Death Star for $15 Septillion?! [starwarsblog]

Thanks to Adam, who the Force is totally with.

Mar 10 2008 Live Underwater: Dive Tanks Recycle Oxygen

The Poseidon Mk IV Discovery is a dive tank that recycles oxygen, so you can stay underwater long enough to fall in love with a mermaid and produce mutant children. Awesome, I know. Just don't go settling for a manatee like I did. The system works through the use of C02 scrubbers and oxygen cells powered via lithium-ion battery. Unfortunately the unit does not protect divers from the bends. Or the runs. Which, in my case, are a serious problem.

Mk IV Discovery rebreather recycles oxygen for longer diving [dvice]

Feb 15 2008 Fish Forest Fishtanks Are So Freaking Sweet

I love aquariums, they're so relaxing. I used to have one in my bedroom until the sound of it started making me piss the bed. However that may be worth it to have the beauty of an Adana Aqua Forest Aquariums bedside. They're amazing. However due the incredible plantlife contained in each, they're difficult to maintain. CO2 and fertilizer must be added to the tank, along with grow lights and a special filter system. I think this type of system might also limit the type of fish you can put in the tank, as I only saw tetras in the pictures (I could be wrong about this). All I know is that I want one yesterday. Unfortunately my cats would have a field day with the open top design. I learned this the hard way with the open top mouse cage I used to have.

RIP Professor Squeak, Squeakers, Cheddar, Cheerio, Mighty, Danger, Red Eyes, Mickey, Minnie, Pikachu, Stich, Whiskers, Jujube, Kitty Food, Rascal and Cheeky. You're missed dearly.

Hit the jump for a bunch more of the awesome aquariums, along with a link to their gallery that is a must see if you like there. And no, I've never actually had any pet mice. Those beady eyed bastards scare the shit out of me.

Continue Reading " Fish Forest Fishtanks Are So Freaking Sweet "

Jan 28 2008 Fire Extinguisher Fights Fires With Balls

This conceptual fire extinguisher from designer Woo Seok Park comes packed with both oxygen tanks (for breathing) and fire-retarding powder balls (for retarding fires). So if your house is ablaze you grab this sucker and make your way to an exit while puffing the oxygen and tossing the balls.

The user rolls or throws the capsules toward the fire. The capsule, made of a material that reacts to high temperatures, will explode when it reaches the fire. Thus, the user does not need to get close to the fire in order to put it out. The elasticized body of the capsule enables it to absorb shock when it is thrown.

Sounds good. Just hope you don't run out of balls. I certainly wouldn't though, because I happened to have been born with three extra. While I haven't tested their fire-fighting capabilities, they've certainly extinguished my sex life.

Another picture of the device releasing a ball, after the jump.

Continue Reading " Fire Extinguisher Fights Fires With Balls "