Aug 12 2008 Oh Great, Now There's A LittleDog Too
Remember when Boston Dynamics heralded the robot apocalypse with the creation of the BigDog? Well now the uncaring bastards have made a LittleDog too. You know, one that isn't as big or loud as the original. Why? To kill you easier.
LittleDog is a quadruped robot for research on learning locomotion. Scientists at leading institutions use LittleDog to probe the fundamental relationships among motor learning, dynamic control, perception of the environment, and rough terrain locomotion.
Run for the hills! I imagine a scenario that plays out something like this: A platoon of BigDogs are released into the wild, each with a payload of several LittleDogs. When a human presence is detected in the area, a LittleDog is deployed, where it seeks out said humans and kills them (possibly by self-detonation). This is repeated until I'm the only one alive and living in an underground bunker. At this time, I manage to capture a BigDog, and, in an attempt to create a race of cyborgs to battle my robot overlords, mate with said beast. But in my haste, I fail to realize I've captured a male model! I bang it every day but never produce any cyborgs. Then I die. And that, my friends, is how the human race dies out. Happy ending!
Hit the jump for two more robots of the apocalypse that Boston Dynamics has created, RISE, a climbing bot, and RHex, which can pretty much do anything, including swim.
May 28 2008 'Perfect Woman' Robot Is Far From Perfect
Remember Aiko, the life-like wheelchair-bound robot woman that slapped you if you tried to touch her boobs? Yeah, that was wrong on every level possible. Well here comes another robot companion for men -- Lisa, the Perfect Woman. She can allegedly cook dinner and I really hope this is fake.
We created a technology called RKS, "Recognition Krax System", which allows for vocal, tactile and visual recognition. Lisa is able to recognize objects and persons and she can even differentiate between roses and tulips for example.
...everything started with a book called Love + Sex with Robots: the Evolution of Human-Robot Relationships by David Levy. I had always thought that one day technology would allow us to create a robot that would be able to perfectly imitate human behaviour. With Lisa we succeeded.
Well I've heard enough. Seriously, sex with robots is just wrong, period. Call me crazy, but what in the hell's the matter with good old fashioned analog sex with an inflatable sheep?
Another MUST MUST SEE video about a guy that allegedly fell in love with one of these, after the jump. Note: They block out his face and make him sound like he sucked down a helium tank so he can't be identified and ridiculed. And no, it's not me, I swear*.
*On the robotic life of my beloved Lisa.
UPDATE: As I had hoped this is strongly believed to be a hoax and an actual real-life woman. But I humped her anyway and she did start smoking out one of her ears. So what conclusion can we draw from this? I clearly have no idea where a woman's vagina is located.
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