Sep 20 2009 Reusable Pokémon Woman Pad Thingies
I don't even know what to say except WTF, HORF and I would totally tape that to my head like a do-rag. Available for $8 on Etsy, this reusable menstrual pad (I can't believe I'm typing this) is perfect for the Pokémon-loving, environmentally friendly chick with unshaven pits in your life. Not bleach safe or for human consumption. Really?! THEN WHY DID I JUST EAT ONE? Wait, why did I just eat one? My stomach: pump it. The contents: gotta catch 'em all!
Pokémon Menstrual Pad, Yours for Eight Bucks [kotaku]
Thanks to Aisha, I think.
Aug 25 2009 "Don't Be Afraid" He Murmured, His Velvet Voice Unintentionally Seductive
That's right folks, now there's a Twilight/vampire themed sex toy. It's a sparkly dildo and marks the coming of the apocalypse.
Updated by popular request... Yes the The Vamp retains hot and cold temperature. Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience (OR A FIRE!).
JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN! Who doesn't love those dark and mysterious vamps on the screen and in the books we all thumb through lustfully? That's what we thought. For those of us who fantasize about being spellbound and tantalized by the forbidden comes The Vamp. We promise this vamp won't be the only thing coming for you in the night.The Vamp is a realistic form based appropriately on our Sire's design but with a deathly pale flesh tone reminiscent of the new moon's glow. Since it's a Tantus toy, The Vamp is made from Tantus' own unique blend of 100% Ultra-Premium Silicone. Don't be surprised if this toy seduces you, its long sleek shaft and deliciously ridged head calling to you in the twilight. But don't save this for just nocturnal escapades, try taking our Vamp out in the sunlight and watch him sparkle.
Yes, out in the sunlight. Because a public park is the perfect place to vamp yourself. Also, to rollerblade. Don't forget your pads and helmet!
NSFW Product Site (with video!)
Thanks to Shannon, LisaMarie, Joemo, Cloie, Ashley, sham, Evy, rya and anyone else I may have forgotten, for all chipping in and ordering me one. You did order me one, right guys?
May 28 2009 Pfft, I Can Do That: Wicked Ninja Moves
This is a video of some guy named Damien Walters pulling off all sorts of real-life ninja/superhero moves. It is the perfect blend of amazing gynmastics and homoeroticism. Dude kind of reminds me of Wolverine, but without the adamaluminum (was that sacrilegious?) claws. He does all kinds of ridiculously ridiculous things, but I particularly liked the car trick at 0:45. You see that? Suck it, Bo Duke!
Thanks to Harry, who can do all those moves times ten. Blindfolded. With Yoda on his back.
Feb 25 2009 Yes Please!: Life-Size Dinosaur Bone Pillows
Sadly, they're not the sort of dinosaur bone pillows I was hoping for. But they'll have to do. Or, I'll have to do, rather.
Sayaka Yamamoto has designed replica of real dinosaur bones made from soft rubber-coated foam. Imagine yourself curling up on a T-Rex tail with a good book or sitting in front of your TV up on the horns of a Triceratops skull.
ZOMG -- sitting on the horns of a Triceratops!?!? Are they trying to make it all steamy in here? Because I can barely see past my glasses. Haha -- they're all filled with bourbon. Everything looks brown!
Life sized dinosaur bones is way cooler than pillows [newlaunches]
Thanks to eloy, who tricked me over to his house with the promise of a time machine but it turned out to just be a washing machine. I puked during the spin cycle.
Dec 2 2008 That's Cold!: Ice Sculpture Carving Fail
If there's one thing I love in life it's another person's misfortune. A close second is dessert. One time I was scarfing grimace proportions of peach pie a la mode in a restaurant and some guy tripped and busted his face open on the sidewalk. I whip creamed my pants. So this ice sculpture fiasco was a real treat. Of course, it helped that I was finishing off the last of the pumpkin pie while I watched. And taunting a bum with a half eaten turkey sandwich.
Note: The Geekologie Writer actually takes no pleasure in other people's misfortune. He is a caring and sensitive man-boy who volunteers at the local strip club and once saved a busload of schoolchildren from alligators because their teacher was hot. Did I mention he has a wang the size of Texas? Because he does. Unless that's too big, in which case it's one of the Carolinas (take your pick) but shaped like Florida (cooking accident). Laaadies?
Youtube
via
Failblog
Thanks to Colin, who once made love to an ice sculpture mermaid.
Nov 30 2008 Christmas Came Early This Year (And You Might Too): Gen¹³ Caitlin Fairchild Cosplay
As the angel of holiday cheer, I felt obligated to post these pictures of some chick cosplaying it up as Caitlin Fairchild from the Gen¹³ comic book series. Honestly, I had no idea who Caitlin was, but now I can safely say that her image is burnt into my retinas. Literally, I used a coat hanger and butane lighter. Hit the jump for three more pics, all of which are significantly cheekier than this one. You catch my drift? I'm talking about her ass -- her ass is hanging out.
Hit it, you want to.
Nov 4 2008 Go Vote (And Recieve A Free Sex Toy)!
If you haven't voted yet, go do it. Like right now. I'll still be here when you get back, no worries. And, if you live in New York or Seattle, go collect your free sex toy afterwards. Ah, democracy.
To encourage your involvement in the democratic process, Babeland is offering a Get Out the Vote Special Giveaway!!
Stop by any brick and mortar store (New York or Seattle) between November 4th and 11th and bring your voter registration card, voting stub or word of honor. If you voted, we'll give you a Silver Bullet or a Maverick Sleeve (get it?) for free! Yes, free. It's because we value voting that much. Sex toys for voting, only the satisfaction of having helped ensure your country's future can be better than that.
I have no idea what a Maverick Sleeve or Silver Bullet is, but they sound, well, awesome. And they're free! Then, when you candidate loses, you can [insert joke about getting f***ed in more ways than one for the next four years].
GO VOTE!
Get Out the Vote with Babeland [babeland]
Thanks to Jennie, who's upset she doesn't live in Seattle or New York.
