Nov 19 2009 Just Make Your Own: Cantena Chain Clock
I like this clock. I can't exactly say why but I think it's because it costs $2,338 and is definitely something my son team of highly skilled artisans could recreate for a fraction of the cost, ultimately saving you, the sucker, a bundle.
one of our favorite wall clocks, the catena wall clock harkens back to traditional mechanical clocks. copper digits mounted onto a bicycle chain place emphasis on the cyclical nature of time. this clock is a striking clock, literally and figuratively.
IT'S A GEAR AND BICYCLE CHAIN. Sure it's awesome looking but you can't justify a $2,400 pricetag. Besides, what if some punk steals my chain for his BMX? Then I'm timeless! Which, God just look at my chiseled features, I really am.
Thanks to Danundertheice and darwyn4, who know what time it is. Am I right, Flavor Flav? Nice viking helmet.
Oct 22 2009 For Your Internal Operating System: Japanese Burger Kings Selling Windows 7 Whoppers
Because there's no better way to market a new operating system, Burger Kings in Japan are selling limited edition Windows 7 Whoppers to coincide with the release of the operating system today. What is a Windows 7 Whopper? Try seven mostly-beef patties stacked high on a sesame seed bun with lettuce, tomato, onions, pickles, ketchup and mayonnaise. What, no cheese? But I want to die! 30 customers a day will be able to buy the whopping Whopper for ¥777 ($8.55), but after that it'll set you back a staggering ¥1,450 ($17.10). Which, I'm sorry, but no way. $17 for a burger? THOSE BETTER BE SNOW LEOPARD PATTIES. See what I did there? God I'm L337.
Burger King selling a Windows 7 Whopper in Japan [engadget]
Thanks to nichire, Jamez, and Billy Avenue, who could each eat two of these and still down a chocolate milkshake and some onion rings.
Sep 1 2009 I LIKE BIG LETTERS: WOMAN FIRED FOR USING CAPS IN A COMPANY EMAIL
Yelling, as you may well know, is a great way to get your point across. And capitalization is yelling's written equivalent. Don't believe me? LET'S TAKE THIS OUTSIDE!
An accountant in NZ has been awarded $17,000 NZD for unfair dismissal after her boss fired her without warning for using uppercase letters in a single email to co-workers. The email, which advises her team how to fill out staff claim forms, specifies a time and date highlighted in bold red, and a sentence written in capitals and highlighted in bold blue. It reads: 'To ensure your staff claim is processed and paid, please do follow the below checklist.' Her boss deemed the capital letters too confrontational for her co-workers to read after they woke up from naptime.
I love capital letters. I don't want to marry them or anything, but I would go out on a couple dates and maybe slip a big W the tongue. Don't judge me -- I'LL TELL EVERYONE YOU BANG NUMBERS AND SYMBOLS!
Woman Fired For Using Uppercase In Email [slashdot]
Thanks to Jen, who once popped a caps lock in some bitch's ass for frontin'.
Aug 31 2009 Is That A Spaceship?: XBox 720 Concept
This is a conceptual design of an XBox 720 by Tai Chiem. Why he assumes that Microsoft is even gonna call the new console the 720 is beyond me. It's not like there was a 180. Maybe they'll call it a 540. Or, if they're really high, the 420. Anyways, I only posted this because it reminds of the spaceship in 'Flight of the Navigator' and that movie is badass. Who else wants one of those little Puckmaren aliens that the kid stuffs into his backpack at the end? I do. Also, Sarah Jessica Parker when she was 21. And no, that's not creepy of me. "See you later, Navigator!"
Hit the jump for several other renderings from different angles.
Aug 22 2009 High Security: USB Drive Has Number Lock
Worried about somebody getting at the precious files on you flash drive? Try keeping it in your pocket and not leaving it on the bus. But if you're really worried you should handcuff it to your wrist like a briefcase filled with pirate treasure. Alternatively, get a Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive ($99).
[The drive] features a built in num keypad that requires you to enter a pin code before you can access your data. It is the 256bit encryption, if someone try to access your data by forcing access, the Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive will automatically destroy all data stored on the drive. However, if you do worry that you'll forget your PIN you can back everything up online, and there's also an optional PIN replacement assistance service available too.
Wow, that seems pretty intense. You must have some seriously serious files in order to require this much security. What are you, a spy? And, if so, how about hooking me up with a bow tie camera?
Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive [likecool]
Thanks to Ste, who keeps his data protected the old fashioned way: with hungry lions.
Jul 28 2009 I'd Type With It: Font Created By Driving A Car
Personally, I've always wanted a font created out of my handwriting because I have the cutest damn handwriting in the world (I even dot my i's with hearts!), but hey, a driving font, that's cool too.
Graphic designers Pierre Smeets and Damien Aresta, known collectively as pleaseletmedesign, teamed up with professional race car driver Stef van Campenhoudt to...create a font.
As you can see Campenhoudt did the "writing". The 4 dots on the roof of the car was tracked in real time using a camera and a custom software designed by fellow artist Zachary Lieberman of openFrameworks.
If you ask me, I'd say it turned out pretty well. So go ahead -- ask me. I think it turned out pretty well. Told you! I AM A MAN OF MY WORD.
Hit the jump for a video of the font creation in action, complete with soundtrack that gave me an aural seizure.
Continue Reading " I'd Type With It: Font Created By Driving A Car "
Jul 8 2009 WHOO! Party Like It's 12:34:56 07/08/09!
That's right folks, the once-twice-(12 hours apart)-in-100-years time and date just went down (at least here, not yet if you live out west). So if you missed it, that's too bad, because you won't live to see another one. I will though, because I'm being cryogenically frozen. And in 100 years I am going to be unfrozen and take a harem of future-women. Or, thawed out by robots and forced into slavery. Which is why I'm gonna be frozen complete with cyanide capsule. Because I'm smart. Ooooh, a Tic-Tac!
For those who missed the big event, 04:05:06 07/08/09 will still be coming up a little later this afterGYAAHHHH *thud*
You Guys, 12:34:56 7/8/9 Is a Once in a Lifetime... Oh, You Missed It [gizmodo]
Thanks to Julian M. and Matt, who are smart enough to know the world is going to end when I say it will (tomorrow). Last night on the planet! Ladies?
Apr 16 2009 Faceless Watch Lacks Face, Hides LEDs
The LED watch was designed by Hironao Tsuboi and appears to just be a metal band. But it's actually hiding a deep, dark secret: it once ran over a bum and didn't stop! Or, LEDs. Push a button, BOOM: the time. Don't push the button, BOOM: no time. Push my buttons, BOOM: fisticuffs.
Hit the jump for another picture.
Apr 7 2009 Man Finds Card Number Skimmer Attached To ATM, Removes, Takes Pictures, Internets
A man, Dan we'll call him, because that's his name (or is it? Allegedly it is), visited a Washington Mutual ATM to get some money. Pretty normal story so far, right? Did I mention he was wearing a dinosaur costume? He wasn't -- but you're right, that would have added a sexy twist. Well, when Danald was about to stick his junk in the machine, he noticed something fishy -- the junk receptacle just didn't feel right. So he ripped it off and, HIYO, a card skimmer! For those of you not in on the government conspiracy, skimmers are used to steal your credit card numbers and join adult websites. *ahem* So I've heard. Seriously though, I don't need technology to score women's numbers. Here, watch me work my magic on this chick.
Hey good lookin', what's your name? Oooh, Jenny, I like that. I'm Dick Dragon. I write Geekologie -- maybe you've heard of it? G-E-E-K-O-L-O-G-I-E. It's a website. Just Myspace, huh? Well listen -- you wanna come back to my place later and play strip Risk? No? Well how about you write your number down on this bar napkin anyways. Whoa, you actually did. 867-5309, I'll be calling you later. *wink*
A Man Finds an Actual Card Skimmer in the Wild, in the Flesh [gizmodo]
Apr 6 2009 It Hurts Just To Look At: The Trippy Clock
This Salvador Dali clock costs $15 and is painful to look at. I glanced at it once and nearly lost it. Then, which I was editing the image, I puked in my mouth a little. It was yogurt-y.
Just follow the hands out to meet the face and you'll be just fine. Zany is one word for it. Eclectic another. Put it above a bar and you'll have the punters examining the contents of their glasses. In short, buy this slippery, rubbery chronograph and say 'Hello, Dali' to a distorted vision of time. And an insight into the mind of a creative genius.
I don't know about all that. Besides, who needs a clock to make them feel like they're tripping? Now if you really wanna trip you need to drink this right here. Yeah, I know it tastes awful, but just trust me. Theeeeeere you go. So, feel anything yet? No? Well maybe you should walk around a little. *THUD* HAHA -- I tied your laces together when you were busy drinking my urine!
freaky dali-esque clock is twirlin', not meltin' [technabob]
Jan 24 2009 Special Ring Counts How Much You Love
This isn't just any ring, it's a special one -- for your penis. Makes the perfect engagement ring for when your member decides to finally tie the knot with Ms. Hand.
A stretchy, orgasm-enhancing ring that actually counts your BPM - otherwise known as Bonks Per Minute! Slide the ring over your penis and enjoy a longer, harder erection as well as the fun of knowing how many times you've thrust per session!
That's right, you just slip your junk in there, have some sex, and it counts how many thrusts you complete before disappointing your partner. In my case six, give or take four (take four).
Hit the jump for two more views and a link to the NSFW product site. Aaaaaaand I'm spent.
Dec 3 2008 Highly Questionable: Stoned Sesame Street
This is a Sesame Street ripoff featuring the Pot Cookie Monster. You know, because he loves pot cookies. Now as someone who's done several people's fair share of drugs in their life (do as I say kids, not as I do), I found it lacking. I question if the makers have ever actually made a GB out of a Mountain Dew 2-liter or eaten a peanut butter and mushroom sandwich. Just saying, I spoke to a parking cone for over an hour. Good people.
Thanks to Hunter, who knows the magic's in the butter. And also, the hat. We're on to you Frosty!
Dec 2 2008 Happy Something! iPhone Has 10,000 Apps
The iPhone now has over 10,000 apps, and to celebrate, somebody made a mosaic. Not exactly how I celebrate (I get drunk as shit), but a little time in front of Photoshop works too. And speaking of iPhone apps, I have like four. Including, and pretty much limited to: rotary dialer, that maze game with the ball, Facebook, and AIM. And I may or may not have that ocarina app (I do). Oh snap, and the booby one. Maybe I'll get some more.
UPDATE: Okay, I got distracted and didn't get any new apps. Folks -- there is porn ON THE INTERNET!
Jul 24 2008 ZombieHarmony: The Zombie Of Your Dreams Is Only A Click Away
Still looking for that special someone zombie? Well look no further than ZombieHarmony, an online dating service for the undead. ZombieHarmony...because the apocalypse doesn't have to be lonely. But don't go trying to use the site if you haven't been infected.
Disclaimer: ZombieHarmony is for zombies only. We advise signing up for ZombieHarmony only if you lack a pulse, have limited motor skills, or feel an intense desire to feast on human beings. We are not responsible for lost or ingested loved ones. If you go on a date with a zombie, we cannot be held liable for contributing to the apocalypse.
Please date responsibly: bring a baseball bat or crowbar.
Despite the warning, I used the site anyways and think I found the zombie of my dreams, her name is LimblessLisa, and she's gorgeous in a corspy kinda way. Just kidding, I don't think the site really works, it's just a fun looking frontpage. Sorry to let you down, sickos. But seriously, if you want to date an undead bitch with a taste for blood my ex-girlfriend's number is (XXX) XXX-XXXX.
UPDATE: Had to remove the number. Haha, I'm being sued!
Thanks to Alex, Julian, and Shawn, all of whom used the website to score some zombie brain.
Mar 21 2008 End Of The World Clock Is Inaccurate
Artist Gianni Motti had a dream. A dream of a really long LED timer that displays an approximate countdown to the sun's demise and resulting destruction of the earth. It started in 2005, so we're at about 5 billion years minus a few. But I've got some bad news for you Gianni. The world will end when I say so. And it's going to be a hell of a lot sooner than 5 billion years. That's right, and there's nothing that blue douche Captain Planet and his kiddy companions can do about it either. MUWHAHAHA!! *cough, cough* *chin falls off* F***ing leprosy.
clock counts down to the end of the world [technabob]
