Somebody's old-ass grandma in San Diego is making a fortune selling $60 suicide kits online designed to enable a person to constantly inhale pure helium gas (not included) and die. Me? I plan on accidentally inhaling a mouthful of titties when I'm like 400 and choking to dea... / Continue →

Picture unrelated, but you've still got to admire that aim. A man (possibly this one), upset his favorite Taco Bell staple, the Beefy Crunch burrito, skyrocketed in price from a moderate $0.99 to an out-of-this world $1.49, decided to take matters into his own hands. And by m... / Continue →

I know, I'm still dry-heaving about it. Or maybe it was the roach I found in my cereal hanging onto a Cheerio like a life preserver. Whatever the case, I think I'm empty now. Let's proceed with caution: James Gilpin is a designer and researcher who works on the implementati... / Continue →

This is a video of a shop keeper in Mexico fighting his laptop away from two would be thieves while being shot at. Now I'm not saying this guy has cojones de oro, but I am saying he must have some seriously illegal shit on that laptop. Store Clerk Dodges Bullet to Keep His La... / Continue →

And in a bit of sad news, a Chinese factory worker jumped to his death after losing track of an iPhone prototype he was responsible for shipping to Apple. The dead worker, Sun Danyong, 25, worked in product communications at Foxconn Technology Group, a Taiwanese firm that make... / Continue →

I can't even count the number of times I've been contacted by Nigerian princes to help move their money out of the country. Unfortunately, I don't keep a bank account because that's just another way the man tries to keep tabs on my brothel me on a short leash. Anyway, I like ... / Continue →

I'm pretty sure by definition you can't sell yourself as a slave for a month, because that kind of negates the whole slavery thing. This guy is basically a really douche-y manservant. I mean, he's no Alfred. What we have for auction today is a slave, a very fit male slave. H... / Continue →

This street-legal racecar limo is actually available for hire and can allegedly reach up to 300MPH. Of course your sissy of a driver will probably never top 65MPH, but that's because this whole idea is stupid. Unless you get a couple highspeed track runs before going to you t... / Continue →

And that, my friends, is why I never leave the house. Youtube Thanks to The free faller, who took one wrong step.... / Continue →

Gunnar glasses ($100 - $189!!!!!!!!!!) come in cleverly named styles like Bit Surfer, Wi-Five and El Doucherino, and are supposed to prevent the eye fatigue caused by blogging eight hours a day. That's right ladies and gentlemen....prepare to experience "Enhanced Computer Visi... / Continue →