Sep 30 2009 100% Badass: Monkey Island 2 Rendered 3D
This is a video of some of the scenery in Monkey Island 2 rendered in 3D using the Crysis engine. It is by far the most beautiful thing I've seen in recent history (not including that glimpse I caught of myself getting out of the shower Monday).
This video is an experiment done for fun. It demonstrates how original Monkey Island 2 backgrounds look and feel in a modern 3d game engine. The sets were built using Maya and then exported into Cryengine's Sandbox editor.
Was that not awesome? Cause it most definitely was. And in other Monkey Island news, the third serial in the latest Monkey Island series just dropped yesterday, so I've been playing it in between posts. A strong work ethic: I have one. Also, left hook. POW! Haha, you didn't believe me! Look at yourself, lying there bleeding, you oughta be ashamed! Unless you're a girl, in which case that was totally the guy behind me.
Thanks to Martyn, who once killed a three-headed monkey and had it stuffed and mounted in his rumpus room.
Sep 18 2009 September 19th Is Int'l Talk Like A Pirate Day!
That's right you salty, half-masted sons of wenches, tomorrow (September 19th) be International Talk Like A Pirate Day. And to celebrate, TellTale Games is giving away free 1-part episodes of Tales of Monkey Island. Also, I will be getting drunk all day wearing an eyepatch and waving a plastic cutlass. So, if you want some free awesome gameage head over HERE tomorrow to claim your booty. Unless you already own the game like I do CAUSE YOU ARE A PIRATE 4 LIFE! Now, whattya say you and I swill some grog and yell at the wenches? What do you mean, "no"? That's it: hand me my wooden leg, I'm gonna kick your ass.
Thanks to deadbodyman, who talks like a pirate all the time because he illegally downloads copywritten files online all day.
Sep 8 2009 Argentinian Geeks Prank Local News Station Monkey Island Style
A group of Argentinian geeks apparently made a Facebook page about how to make grog (kerosene, artificial sweeteners, sulfuric acid, rum with acetone, red dye # 2, axle grease and battery acid), the delicious concoction from Monkey Island, and tipped off a local news channel to the dangers the nation's youth are subjecting themselves. I especially love how they included the XD emoticon as part of the drink name. Nice touch. This just goes to show, you can't believe everything you hear in the news. Unless you read it here, in which case it's like the word of God. But with a deeper, more commanding voice.
Thanks to Drenix, Totex, and whoever else sent this whose email I can't find, the next round's on me. BUT NOT LITERALLY. You spill on my shirt and I will punch you in your face.
Aug 27 2009 Why Didn't I Think Of That?: Banana Phone
The Banana Cellfoam is a $10 piece of foam rubber that molds around your mobile phone, making it appear as though you're taking calls with a banana. Which I think we can all agree is pretty genius. Plus, you can turn your phone on vibrate and tell a friend to call for an instant sex toy! Kidding, that's icky. Holsters for the banana phone are also available, or you can just keep it in your pocket and save $8 while gaining some much needed respect from the ladies. You know, because they won't think it's a banana -- they'll think it's a gun! And firearms, dear reader, should be respected at all times.
Thanks to Matt, who once tried to impress the ladies with a whole pocketful of bananas but ended up getting beat within an inch of his life by a monkey that escaped the circus riding a tiger.
Jun 5 2009 NEW MONKEY ISLAND GAME COMING OUT
Let's kick this Friday off right, huh? THERE IS A NEW GAME IN THE MONKEY ISLAND SERIES COMING JULY 7th! Not only that, Lucasarts is releasing a remake of the original Secrets of Monkey Island, also set to drop this summer (for XBox Arcade, PC and Mac). Quick, grog me so we can cheers!
Tales of Monkey Island (PC and WiiWare) will be released in five monthly serials by Telltale Games beginning July 7th in the same fashion as the recenter Sam & Max and Strongbad games. You can preorder now for $35. I just preordered with two different credit cards in case I screwed something up the first time. And I may do it a third just to be safe. Now, granted the style of graphics really isn't my favorite, but that's okay. MONKEY ISLAND, YO! One of the Jonas Brothers could play Guybrush and I'd still buy it. Kidding, I'd cannonball myself in the face.
Hit the jump for two VIDEOS, one about each of the games coming out.
May 20 2009 Human Evolution's 'Missing Link' Found, Surprisngly Not Your Mom. Oooh, Burn!
A 47-million year old skeleton of what is believed to be the "missing link" in human's evolutionary split from tree-swinging, bug picking, shit throwing apes has been found in Germany and nicknamed "Ida".
"This is the first link to all humans," Hurum, of the Natural History Museum in Oslo, Norway, said in a statement. Ida represents "the closest thing we can get to a direct ancestor."
Ida, properly known as Darwinius masillae, has a unique anatomy. The lemur-like skeleton features primate-like characteristics, including grasping hands, opposable thumbs, clawless digits with nails, and relatively short limbs.
Now I know what you're thinking, and yes, I would hit that like a bushel of bananas with a coconut. Ha, what do you mean that's like my great great great great great great great great great grandmother to the thousandth power? AND SO WHAT IF IT IS?
"MISSING LINK" FOUND: New Fossil Links Humans, Lemurs? [nationalgeographic]
Thanks to Matty, Chris, chubo, Andrew, Jon, Dylan and Paul, who have all slept with cavewomen and liked it. Furplay, baby.
May 13 2009 I Want One: A Real Notebook Computer
This is a video by Dutch artist Evelien Lohbeck that features a real notebook computer. Like a notebook made out of paper. It's pretty neat, and you should watch it (kind of reminded me of A-Ha's Take on Me video). I'm fairly confident the video was made using computer trickery, but I'm not ruling out the possibility that somebody sold their soul to a powerful sorcerer. Which, let's be honest, for your soul, would be a deal. After all, we are men of low moral fiber. Which, holy shit -- another Monkey Island reference?!? I AM THE TOPS!
Youtube
and
The real Notebook Computer! [ebaumsworld]
Thanks to Jack a Shalack and a Yack Yack Yack, who actually only has a single yack and a stuttering problem.
Apr 18 2009 Must Have: Custom Monkey Island Shoes
Converse All-Stars aren't really my thing, but I would make an exception and rock the hell out of these mama-jammas. Inspired by The Secret of Monkey Island, the shoes were hand-painted by a Spanish fan with scenes from the game (the opening and an insult swordfight). Awesome, now I want a pair of custom Monkey Island kicks. Also, a rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle. WHEE!
Hit the jump for close-ups of each shoe.
This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!
And I've got a little TIP for you, get the POINT?
Nov 21 2008 Yarrr, Doubloons!: Live Pirate Map Shows You Where The Plundering Is Going Down
Pirates, they used to wear cool hats. Now? Not so much. But you can still check out their exploits on the International Maritime Bureau's "live piracy map" (based on Google Maps). You know, to see where the booty's being plundered.
Just drill down by using the zoom slider, and click on a flag to see what kind of crime took place. All are labeled with the type of ship, as well as whether the pirates successfully hijacked it or merely boarded. Certain areas, like this one off the coast of East Africa, are pirate paradises. The seas around Singapore and Malaysia are also packed with pirates.
You know where else is packed with pirates? My pants. Isn't that right you little swashbuckling bastards? Haha, just kidding -- they're crabs. I still gave them pirate names though. Stop it Captain Clawhands, that tickles!
Hit the jump for one more map and a link to interactive version in case you can't find the one I cleverly hid in the text of the post.
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