May 1 2009 DIY: How To Get Out Of Jury Duty (Sort Of)
Erik Slye (he is too), 36, of Gallatin County, Monatana really, really, REALLY didn't want to serve on a jury after being summoned for duty. So what did he do? Wrote a nasty letter. His affidavit to the court follows, in case you can't read it in the picture.
Apparently you morons didn't understand me the first time. I CANNOT take time off from work. I'm not putting my family's well being at stake to participate in this crap. I don't believe in our "justice" system and I don't want to have a goddam thing to do with it. Jury duty is a complete waste of time. I would rather count the wrinkles on my dogs balls than sit on a jury. Get it through your thick skulls. Leave me the F--k alone.
Way to hero it up, Erik. "The document, of course, did not sit well with court officials and led a judge to threaten to jail Slye. But after being summoned to court, Slye apologized for the affidavit and avoided being cited on a criminal failure to appear rap. And he also was excused from serving on a jury." Wow. So I guess sometimes writing a nasty letter really does work. Oh, and Erik -- neuter the dog, bro.
New Wrinkle On Avoiding Jury Duty [thesmokinggun]
Thanks to The Jerk and Joemo, who found jury duty a great time to peruse the Geekologie archives.
Mar 14 2008 Mustang Modded Into Transformers Cop Car
Following in the footsteps of other movie car modders, Jessie Vigil of Las Vegas, New Mexico (the Vegas without all the awesome hookers and gambling) has pimped out his 2007 Ford Mustang to look like the evil cop car from Transformers. As you can see it's rocking a fake lightbar and even has the police decal on the side. The best part? "Law enforcement agencies say what he's done with his car isn't illegal as long as he doesn't act like a police officer." OMG, yes! I'm totally doing this. I'm not sure what constitutes "acting like a police officer" but I'm going to take a few liberties and assume it doesn't include ramming other vehicles and driving in the median. Oh, hold on I'm getting an idea. Wait for it. Wait for it. Forget the cop car, I'm going to do the ambulance from, uh, any movie with an ambulance in it! I'll never sit through another red light again! Damn this is making me hot. Uh oh, another idea coming -- concentrate -- fully stocked mini-bar in the back. YES! Okay now I just need to pass this drug and alcohol course and get my license back.
Vegas Man Paints Car Like Police Cruiser [myway]
Thanks to Amanda, who is awesome, for the tip
Feb 27 2008 Man Uses Crappy Looking Robot To Keep Bums From Hanging Out Near His Bar
Rufus Terrill had a dream. A dream of a bar where bums in downtown Atlanta don't hang out and cause problems. Well that dream was quickly fading until he was struck with an idea. An idea of a robot. A robot that looks like a piece of shit and urinates water out of a magic wand. Enter Robo-Cop (aka Bum-Bot), Terrill's brainchild.
The four-foot tall, 300-pound body consists of an old smoker mounted atop an electric scooter. He's mounted a spot light, infrared camera, loud speaker, and water cannon inside the chassis, then wrapped the whole thing in rubber and painted it a menacing black.
Using a remote control and walkie-talkie Terrill notifies vagrants they're trespassing, and if they refuse to leave he douses them. The results have been met with mixed reactions. Some (drunk bar patrons cheering the robot on) think it's awesome. Others, namely the director of the homeless shelter up the block, think it's cruel and unusual. The police agree that if the water cannon is used unprovoked, that it constitutes assault.
Now I don't know how many bums out there are reading this, but if you are, let me give you some schooling: Don't fight the machine. A robot is only as tough as the pederast-looking guy with glasses that's holding the remote control. That is where you will find the source of the robot's power. And the keys to the cash register and liquor closet. Use this knowledge wisely, class is dismissed.
