Oct 22 2009 You're Doing It Wrong: Confidential British Anti-Leak Documents Leaked Online
Apparently a 2,400 page British document outlining how to prevent government officials from leaking confidential information to the internet has been leaked onto the internet.
The 2,400 page Defense Manual of Security, authored by the Ministry of Defense to help high-ranking military and defense officials keep documents safe from leaks, was published on Wikileaks, a Web site designed for anonymous leaks of documents from governments and other organizations, The Daily Telegraph reported Monday.
"Leaks usually take the form of reports in the public media which appear to involve the unauthorized disclosure of official information (whether protectively marked or not) that causes political harm or embarrassment to either the U.K. Government or the Department concerned," the document reads in its "Leaks of Official Information" section.
That's funny. Now I'm not saying I would have leaked the document as well, but I'll be damned if I'm reading 2,400 pages of jibber-jabber. Better to let the media summarize it for me. Hire me, government!
British anti-leaking document leaked [redorbit]
Thanks to Lee, who doesn't leak anything but beer.
Sep 19 2009 Why Not?: Ordering Pizza From Your PS3
Let's be honest with ourselves: we all love pizza. I'm particularly fond of the white variety BUT NOT BECAUSE I'M RACIST (I have a Hispanic friend). I just like the way it tastes in my mouth. Like ice cream, but hot. Anyway, now you can order Papa John's pizzas from you PS3. And you don't even have to go to the internet browser! Because, seriously, that would be way too much thumb exercise. Isn't that right, my opposable little lovers? Now, do that thing that I like so much. Wait! Let me sit on you till you're numb first.
papa john's and playstation 3, because no one wants to get off the couch to order pizza [technabob]
Thanks to chris, who once reheated day-old pizza in his XBox.
Jan 20 2009 Admit It, You're Lazy: A Cup Noodle Machine
Why you'd need a vending machine for a product that only requires hot water and three minutes to be ready for consumption is beyond me. Yet, here it is, a Cup Noodle (I always thought it was Cup-O-Noodles) vending machine.
It's small enough to fit on a counter top, and includes a hot water thermos and storage for up to four Cup Noodle bowls with a dispenser. It even has an automatic timer that'll beep when three minutes is up and your food is ready to eat.
Jesus, it's called a microwave, folks. And who else has accidentally eaten part of the styrofoam cup while downing a Cup Noodle all drunk? Go ahead, admit it -- nothing to be ashamed of. HAHA, you freaking ate the cup! To your credit though, I wouldn't trust you with a fork either.
Nissin offers introverts compact cup noodle vending machines [tokyomango]
Thanks to Niki, who stopped eating Ramen in college because she got to look at some under a microscope and it looked too noodley.
Aug 15 2008 CD Dumbbells: Because, Despite Paying For A Membership, You Never Go To The Gym
Let's face it, going to the gym is a hassle. First you have to get there, then you have to lift stuff and break a sweat, and, as if that weren't enough hassle already, you have to wet the end of your towel and play a little whip-ass in the locker room with the other guys. Am I right? You know -- the game where you all run around trying to whip each other's buttocks with a towel. I love that shit. Well anyway, if you never leave your house you can make a CD dumbbell out of stuff you have laying around. Of course, if you want a real workout, you should come over and lift this 21" CRT monitor off my desk. Yeah, just like that. Remember: lift with the legs and *WHIP* Haha, you can take a boy out of the locker room, but you can't take the love of whipping another man's ass with a moistened towel out of the boy. Also, you dropped my monitor -- you're gonna have to pay for that.
CD dumbbells get you ripped with what you've got lying around [dvice]
Apr 3 2008 Selfy The EasyBed Makes Itself, Is Dangerous
Selfy the Easybed shares its name with a hooker I used to frequent when I was with my first wife. But this one isn't a bucktoothed whore, it's a bed that makes itself. Displayed at the ongoing International Exhibition of Inventions in Geneva, it's the brainchild of Enrico (Suave) Berruti.
The bed sheets are connected to a couple of fasteners which roll along a set of metal rails attached to each side of the bed. Once the sheets are completely spread out, the metal rails automatically lower, creating a neat finish.
Since there's no video and I'm horrible at visualizing things I have no idea what that means or how the hell it works. However, I do have the distinct feeling that it has the ability to crush a still-sleeping lover. After all, what better way to get a one-night stand up and on her way, than, you know, having to call an ambulance.
Selfy The Self-Making Bed [ohgizmo]
Sep 13 2007 Laptop Mount For Your Dorm Bunkbed
This is kind of a neat idea, and I'm a huge fan of anything that lets me be lazier, but it leaves me still wanting something more. I mean you go to college to 1. drink beer 2. get laid, and 3. try to do both at the same time. Despite the Jim Beam poster in the back, I imagine this kid is still eyeing first from the dugout. Now I'm not saying this guy has never touched a boobie or anything, because we all know that will never happen, I'm just saying he may be the world's biggest masturbator.
A few more and a painful video after the jump.
Aug 10 2007 Levo Book Holder
If you're as lazy as I am then you know how annoying it can be holding a book. Well Skymall is selling an innovation that must have been years in development. It is a piece of crap on wheels that looks like a lamp, but holds a book! And it's only $165. I mean it may look awful, but who cares, look at the guy in the photo, he looks real comfortable. Who needs to read anyways when you can pass out under a magazine with your hands in your pants?
Levo Book Holder [OhGizmo]
