Sep 1 2009 It's No Wrist Rest: The Computer Key Seat
Don't smile at me like that! I can tell these $125 computer key seats have been around for a while because of the '© 2004' text in the image. What can I say, I'm observant. Hey -- I saw that! Anyway, this was the first time I'd seen these chairs so they're new to me. If they're not new to you, congratulations, you've been around the block (internet whore).
This unique stool is a great low-tech item for any computer geek. Insert this eye-catching seat in the dorm, game room or even an internet café . The contoured shape holds your backspace just like your finger rests in a key. Measures 22 inches square and 15 inches high and has 'sit' printed on the top. We also offer to customize these stools with your own message or logo.
Yes, but I want mine to be a delete key. Get it? Because I want to delete my fat ass! I heard you want an insert. HIYO!
Thanks to Kristin, who wants an escape.
Jul 13 2009 Why Didn't I Think Of That?: Split-Ring-Key
Sometimes it's the simplest things that are best. Like a bacon sandwich on a crisp morning or tricking a dinosaur into thinking another meteor is coming so you can bed it that night. And then there's this keyring. Which is both key AND keyring. What will they think of next?!?
Carry your keys on your other key. Real working key blank. Key blank can be cut by any key cutter to fit KW1 or SC1 keyways.
You can get a 2-pack for $7, which, according to my calculations, makes a 4-pack about $18. What? I NEVER LEARNED THE MATHS, OKAY? But you know what -- YOU DON'T NEED ALGEOMETRY TO KNOW HOW TO BLOG! Or any skills really. Just a drinking problem.
Split Ring Key [amronexperimental]
Thanks to Scott, who actually invented the thing. Nice, now how about a door that is both door AND knob. Oh I'm sorry, did I just blow everybody's minds?
Jan 25 2009 Revenge For Bicyclists: Handlebar Key Plugs
Are you a bicyclist that's tired of being cut off and hit by cars? Well get a pair of these handlebar key plugs and you can at least deface the perpetrator's car in the process of getting run over.
These modified handlebar plugs speak to the disgruntled urban cyclist. By retro-fitting stock parts with up-cycled keys, bikers can now find satisfaction with close encounters. This concept puts a new twist on the timeless tradition of car-keying revenge. By Matt Braun and Jared Delorenzo.
They cost $5 for a set of two and fit snugly into regular handlebars and assholes. But in all honesty, if I catch you keying my car I can and will kill you. I'm serious -- if you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots.
Continue Reading " Revenge For Bicyclists: Handlebar Key Plugs "
Jan 14 2009 What Did I Just Type?: A Klingon Keyboard
Want to make sure nobody in the office steals your keyboard? Well how about a Klingon one?
This exclusive Klingon language keyboard is based on the best selling G83-6000 series keyboards from Cherry.It is a good quality keyboard with 105 keys, PS/2 connection and is available currently in black. This keyboard will be available for delivery from mid November, but demand for this limited edition is high so reserve yours now to be the first with this exclusive model.
"Good quality", pfft, that's marketing speak for piece of shit. Why do I get the feeling somebody got a great deal on a bunch of old keyboards and retrofitted them with Klingon keys? Right, because that's exactly what happened. Get your today for about $65. Thankfully, I got mine yesterday. jIH 'oH tlhIngan chugh SoH Har wIj nach 'oH qab SoH ghajbe' leghpu' wIj penis!
Klingon Keyboard: for serious Trekkies only [dvice]
and
Klingon Translator (in case you need help translating)
Dec 19 2008 Stocking Stuffer: Companion Cube Keychains
Want to carry a little companion cube with you wherever you go? No problem, thanks to Etsy seller donsolo's $22 companion cube keychains.
Made with geeky love from .100" thick reclaimed aluminum. It measures 1.25" x 1.25" (about 3cm x 3cm). The surface has a brushed finish that will wear over time. It's attached to a clip style key holder with a flexible metal cord. End to end it's almost 4".
Perfect for the Portal lover on your gift list, the little cubes make a great stocking stuffer. And you know what else does? Those sexy legs of yours. Ooo la la!
Thanks to Michael, who may or may not have a financial interest in the sale of these keychains.
Nov 6 2008 I Dare Say Old Bean, Beautiful Keyboard
Well, it's been a little while since we've kicked it oldschool style here on Geekologie, so let's take it back to '79 -- 1879 -- with this steampunkified ergonomic keyboard.
This keyboard was commissioned by a female client and has some elegant, feminine design features such as violet LEDs, an acanthus-leaf pattern etched into the brass, and a soft burgundy wrist pad that is removable for cleaning. It also has a built-in "buttonless" touchpad mouse in the center (tap anywhere to left-click and drag, tap in the top-right corner to right-click). This keyboard is interesting because the typing plane is actually tipped forward rather than back. It looks odd at first, but actually makes for a very comfortable typing position.
Sweet, but where do you put the coal? Plus -- wait a minute -- chicks are into this whole steampunk thing? *donning tophat and monocle* Laaaaadies? No, I'm not Mr. Peanut!
Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures, including what the original keyboard looked like.
Continue Reading " I Dare Say Old Bean, Beautiful Keyboard "
Sep 5 2008 Sure, Why Not?: The Enter Doorbell
The Enterbell is just that, an Enter key doorbell. Pretty straightforward. No ess curves required to understand this one. Unfortunately, it's currently only a concept created by Li Jianye. Wait a minute -- a concept? How hard is it to glue an Enter key to a regular freaking doorbell? Not very if you don't glue your hand down your pants first (I'm typing one-handed). Seriously though, if you want an Enter doorbell, don't wait for Li, just yank a key of your choice off a coworker's keyboard and glue that puppy on. Enter key alternatives include 'Home' and 'Insert'. Or, if you're not into the whole technology thing, you could just hang a sweet knocker. Knock knock. Who's there? Enter. Enter who? Me from behind, I'm feeling kinky!
Geeky Doorbell Speaks For Itself [ohgizmo]
Aug 27 2008 The Crayola EZ Type: This Isn't Your Kid's Keyboard. Ha, Just Kidding, It Totally Is
The $30 Crayola EZ Type USB Keyboard is a great way to get youngsters familiar with colors, and also, important computer skills that will benefit them throughout their adult lives. Namely, surfing interweb porno. And, to make it even easier for the tykes, Crayola appears to have added a "Porn" key, right above the directional pad. I mean, it's got to be real, it's right there in the picture. What? Photoshop? Like a place that develops film? Never heard of it.
Joel's next keyboard: Crayola EZ Type [bbgadgets]
Aug 25 2008 Smart Goggles Help Find Stuff You've Lost
Smart Goggles not only make you look cool, they help find stuff you've misplaced.
To use the glasses, the wearer first wanders around a house or workplace for an hour or so, looking at the objects he or she may later want to find in a hurry. Each time the camera focuses on a object - such as a set of keys, a mobile phone or a purse - the wearer says the name aloud. The name is then recorded and stored into the memory.Once the names have been programmed in, the glasses will try to find the right name for any object they come across. The names appear in small type on the viewfinder. If they are unable to recognise an object they make a guess and - if they get it wrong - learn from their mistakes.
At some point in the future, if the wearer is trying to find their keys in a hurry, they simply name the object. The glasses search its video memory and show its last known location on the display.
Pretty neat concept, but I don't need any help finding my phone or keys. You see, I keep the phone in my car's cupholder, and just leave the keys in the ignit....freaking crackheads!
The Smart Goggles that could make lost keys, mobile phones or iPod a think of the past [dailymail]
Thanks Lauren, and no, I haven't seen your virginity -- but I'll keep my eyes peeled.
Nov 28 2007 Keyless Keyboard: Wack, Uses Orbs, WTF!?
Sure the QWERTY keyboard may have some issues that need to be addressed in the long run, but I have a hard time believing the OrbiTouch Keyless Keyboard ($400) is going to be the peripheral of the future. Sure it's a far cry from the stupidity of this keyboard, but that doesn't mean anything. How does it work you ask?
Each dome slides into one of 8 zones to type a character. The domes do not twist. Either dome can slide first or move both at the same time. Domes slide toward the center of their respective color or character zones -- not directly at the character. Slide the right dome to the zone of the character you want to type; slide the left dome to the color of that character.
So that's how it works. I still don't get it. May be a great idea for people with disabilities or others with limited motor skills, but for an everyday user? I doubt it. I can burn a QWERTY keyboard with upwards of like 10,000 WPM. Which is one thing I couldn't find out about the OrbiTouch -- how many words per minute can someone prolific with the device type? I couldn't find it on their website. Because it's 10.
OrbiTouch Keyless Keyboard [coolestgadgets]
Nov 15 2007 Key Fob Shocks Unsuspecting Joyriders
The Shocks Car Key ($51), from Bim Bam Banana, is a key fob that looks like it will unlock your car. Except it won't, it will just shock you. How in the hell you're supposed to find someone dumb enough to push the big red button on the side that says "SHOCK" is a mystery to me. Seems like a serious design flaw. I guess you're supposed to scratch it out and write something clever on it like "PUSH ME". And hopefully the person will also ignore the metal electrodes. But if you do find someone to push the button, oh the laughs that will be had! Your friend gets shocked, then kicks out all your lights and breaks the car windows. They'll follow up that hilarity by rubbing your face on the pavement, taking your real keys and backing over you with your own car. What a funny prank!
Product Site [bimbambanana]
Thanks to Stevie, a man who knows how to have a good time, for the tip
Oct 30 2007 Key Holder Is Expensive, Provides No Jingle
The Keyport Key Holder is finally hitting the market. The damn things cost $295 (!) and will first be available only to those on the reserve list. Which, if you are on, is despicable. I mean $300? And why the hell does the thing have a key-ring dongle? What the hell is the matter with just a key-ring? I thought that your status in life was directly proportional to the jingle of the keys you carry. Which, I might add, makes the janitor at work the most successful person I know.
Keyport availability announced, priced outrageously [engadget]
Oct 19 2007 Do It Yourself Wooden Keyboard Available
HACOA has announced their do it yourself wooden keyboard is shipping, and at a measly $300. It comes with everything you see in the picture, including the little saw so you can get the keys apart. For $300 you'd think they'd already be separated, but I guess you're really paying for that DIY experience. If you're a cheap bastard you can just glue Scrabble tiles to the letters of an existing board. Or if you're shopping for something even more exotic, I'm selling DIY stone keyboards. It’s an old keyboard with the keys ripped off, some glue, and a chisel. Kits start at $250. You provide the rock.
One more after the jump.
Continue Reading " Do It Yourself Wooden Keyboard Available "
Oct 17 2007 Keyboard Has Lots Of Buttons, I Like Buttons
The Terpstra MIDI keyboard has 280 keys, which is a lot. You can set each key to whatever the hell you want, and all are velocity sensitive. The keys can be removed and swapped as well, in case the factory default pattern just doesn't do it for you. The unit has jacks for a foot switch, volume pedal, and MIDI in/out. I couldn't find a price, but it's probably expensive. I need one though because I'm a musical prodigy. My specialty is the Jaws theme. I've almost got that one down pat.
Terpstra MIDI Keyboard - Needs More Keys [ohgizmo]
Oct 2 2007 Numeric Keypad + Mouse = Numeric Mouse!
I work almost exclusively from the john, so my computing is typically done via a laptop perched on the sink. Well my little laptop doesn't have a numeric keypad, so when I have to punch in numbers to work out how much I owe in alimony this month, it's a pain. Enter the numeric keypad mouse. For about $28, you can purchase the lovechild of a horny keypad and very slutty mouse. They come in black or white (although the white looks silver to me) and may save you some time while avoiding the shift key. I know I'm going to buy one. Then I'm going to realize that I don't use a mouse on the john and stuff it in a desk drawer to be forgotten.
Numeric Keypad Mouse For Number Nerds Hits [therawfeed]
Sep 6 2007 Keys Find Remote, Remote Finds Keys!
So those crazy folks at Skymall are selling an invention that might actually be useful, unlike, well, most of their stuff, including this thing. It's a keyring that can locate your remote, and a remote that can find your keyring. Whee! They're made by GE and cost $45 a set, which is too expensive. But I still need them. Of course, whenever I lose my keys or remote I should just realize that 1. I don't have keys, I have a chauffeur, and 2. I don't have a remote, I have topless models that walk up and change the channel for me.
Keys Find Remote, Remote Finds Keys! [ohgizmo]
Aug 6 2007 Glass Keys
I'm not sure if this is considered art, but the guy who made these glass keys refers to them as an "installation." Anyway, this is a set of glass keys the artist made out of resin. And, uh, that's it. I don't know if they'd actually function as keys (seems like resin/glass would wear down easily) but at least they look cool. I'd make everything out of glass if I could. Especially girl's locker rooms. It just makes sense.
