Oct 30 2009 $899 For The World's Cleanest Keyboard
Germaphobe? Worried about the bovine flu (it's coming, you watch)? Tired of operating a keyboard when you're 99.98% sure The Superficial Writer was touching with himself while using it? Enter the $899 Vioguard self-sanitizing keyboard.
The Vioguard keyboard is aimed at medical market uses and consumers in Canada. It uses two 25-watt UV lights to kill 99.99% of viruses and bacteria in about 90 seconds. Ultraviolet light is known to be affective against harmful microorganisms such as H1N1 flu, MRSA and molds.
Alternatively, only operate the keyboard while wearing surgical gloves, which is what I do. You should see everybody in the office tense up when I'm slapping them on! I think it's the winking that really gets to them.
The Cleanest Keyboard From Vioguard [techfresh]
Thanks to naas, who doesn't need a keyboard because he rocks dual mice.
Oct 20 2009 Skateboard + Keyboard = Skatekeyboard?
Artist Tobias Leingruber (another nevernude) had a dream. Unfortunately he couldn't remember it when he woke up so he glued a keyboard to a skateboard. The end.
I am not really sure if one can actually balance on this and I am not aware if this piece of artwork has hidden ports to which you can connect to the PC. Either way, it seems like a keyboard that you can't use, and a skateboard that you can't ride on. However, it certainly underlines the importance of fun and frolic in an otherwise dreary lifestyle that we have come to live.
I don't care what they say, I would totally ride this thing. And you know what? I would kick flip its caps lock off. *wicka-pow* THERE I THINK I GOT IT!
THANKS TO JEREMY, WHO LIKES YELLING BECAUSE IT REMINDS HIM OF HIS CHILDHOOD. ME TOO, JEREMY.
SKATEBOARD COMPUTER KEYBOARD BRINGS OUT THE SKATER IN GEEKS [WALYOU]
Sep 1 2009 It's No Wrist Rest: The Computer Key Seat
Don't smile at me like that! I can tell these $125 computer key seats have been around for a while because of the '© 2004' text in the image. What can I say, I'm observant. Hey -- I saw that! Anyway, this was the first time I'd seen these chairs so they're new to me. If they're not new to you, congratulations, you've been around the block (internet whore).
This unique stool is a great low-tech item for any computer geek. Insert this eye-catching seat in the dorm, game room or even an internet café . The contoured shape holds your backspace just like your finger rests in a key. Measures 22 inches square and 15 inches high and has 'sit' printed on the top. We also offer to customize these stools with your own message or logo.
Yes, but I want mine to be a delete key. Get it? Because I want to delete my fat ass! I heard you want an insert. HIYO!
Thanks to Kristin, who wants an escape.
Aug 27 2009 Cry Baby: Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat (R.I.P.)
NOTE: Video possibly NSFW due to cussing (GD) a couple times.
This post originally started as a tribute to Keyboard Cat, who I just found out passed away earlier this year (around May). But then I saw the play him off video featured above of a kid crying about a hockey game and filming it for his Youtube channel when his dad walks in and yells at him for being such an idiot moron. It is amazing. Not that I'd know anything about filming myself crying because sex tapes don't count, right? There was something in my eye!
Hit the jump for another classic play him off from Walker, Texas Ranger (it's even more f'ed up).
Continue Reading " Cry Baby: Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat (R.I.P.) "
Jul 21 2009 Brand Keyboard Replaces Letters With Logos
The Brand Keyboard, designed by Ignacio Pilotto, has logos instead of letters on all the keys. That's neat.
BRANDS : Adidas - Burger king - Coca Cola - Disney - Ebay - Facebook - Google - Hp - Intel - J&b - Kodak - Lacoste - Mac donald´s - Nike - O2 - Pepsi - Quaker - Rolling stone - Shell - Twitter - Unilever - Virgin - WordPress - Xerox - You tube - Zippo
The repetition of the logos used by the advertising psychology, causes us to systematically recognize the brands, getting us to recognize the logos rather than our own alphabet.
Psychology, I love psychology. One time I brainwashed a whole craft room full of senior citizens into thinking I was Jesus, then demanded a tithe. Whee! Next stop: hell.
The Brand Keyboard [geekygadgets]
Thanks to GreenBoss, who controls his rainbow of minions from his throne in the Emerald City.
Jul 21 2009 Magical: This Three Keyboard Cat Moon Shirt
If the 3 Wolf Moon Shirt was magical, imagine the spells you'll be able to cast with this $20 3 Keyboard Cat Moon Shirt! I mean, it combines the sorcery of the 3 wolf moon shirt AND keyboard cat. Rumor has it, the shirt is so powerful it brought somebody's grandmother back to life and got her pregnant. Seriously, I'm not making this up. Yes I am. It was actually somebody's grandfather. Play me off, keyboard cat!
Thanks to Travis, who once wore a 3 Keyboard Cat Moon shirt to a concert and got to sing with the band on stage.
Jun 29 2009 Mmmm, Chocolatey: The S'Mores Keyboard
This is probably the most delicious keyboard I've ever seen because I haven't seen a bacon one yet. Unfortunately, like a harmless robot, it doesn't actually exist. BUT IF IT DID. Oh, the things I would do to you. Oh yeah, you like that? You like those Doritos crumbs? You like those Doritos crumbs between your marshmallows?
S'More Keyboard Would Not Survive 10 Minutes on My Desk [gizmodo]
Thanks to GreenBoss, who kicked FuchsiaBoss's ass and ate his keyboard.
Mar 9 2009 Typing By Taste: A White Chocolate Keyboard
It's a keyboard. It's white chocolate. Aaaand that's all I've got. I don't think it's full-sized. It might be though. But I doubt it. Also, if you ladies out there like white chocolate, that's what I'm made of. But if you don't like white chocolate, then I'm milk chocolate. Unless you don't like chocolate at all, in which case I'm caramel -- sticky sweet and drizzled all over your sundae. I don't even know what that means but I am so craving a banana split right now. Do you like strawberry topping, baby? Awh yeah. How about that pineapple stuff? See, I hate that shit. I don't think this is gonna work out after all.
Teclado de chocolate blanco [noquedanblogs]
Thanks to Romeo, who is allegedly made out of Magic Shell if any of you ladies are interested.
Feb 13 2009 Geeky Cars: I Can't (Floppy) Drive 55!
While this little gallery of cars undoubtedly showcases some seriously geeky automobiles, I don't know if they're the geekiest. I'd like to think the Zelda-mobile and the AeroCivic would be in the running for top prize. That said, I would still never be caught dead in one of these -- unless my bookie finally finds me. In which case, can a person harvest their own organs? Are ears worth anything?
Hit the jump for the rest.
Jan 19 2009 Wood Is Good: A Scrabble Keyboard
Ever wondered what a keyboard would look like if it had Scrabble tiles for keys? This. Finally, you can sleep at night.
This keyboard was commissioned by a couple of friends of mine from back east (NJ) who are avid Scrabble players. Most of the keys are made from real Scrabble tiles that were all hand-beveled (truly an exercise in patience/masochism!) and built onto a USB, clicky, mechanical-switch keyboard. This keyboard was going into a Mac environment so I decided to use brushed aluminum for the casing and round all of the corners to keep with the sleek, simple Macintosh styling. Near the end of the build, I decided that the keyboard looked a little too minimalist so I added some silver hardware and a seam to put a slightly industrialized twist on the design.
Alternatively, glue Scrabble tiles to your current keyboard. Just make sure you put the correct letters on. O YJOML O YXDEW IT IO! That's a bingo, count it.
Hit the jump for a bunch of closeups.
Jan 14 2009 What Did I Just Type?: A Klingon Keyboard
Want to make sure nobody in the office steals your keyboard? Well how about a Klingon one?
This exclusive Klingon language keyboard is based on the best selling G83-6000 series keyboards from Cherry.It is a good quality keyboard with 105 keys, PS/2 connection and is available currently in black. This keyboard will be available for delivery from mid November, but demand for this limited edition is high so reserve yours now to be the first with this exclusive model.
"Good quality", pfft, that's marketing speak for piece of shit. Why do I get the feeling somebody got a great deal on a bunch of old keyboards and retrofitted them with Klingon keys? Right, because that's exactly what happened. Get your today for about $65. Thankfully, I got mine yesterday. jIH 'oH tlhIngan chugh SoH Har wIj nach 'oH qab SoH ghajbe' leghpu' wIj penis!
Klingon Keyboard: for serious Trekkies only [dvice]
and
Klingon Translator (in case you need help translating)
Jan 6 2009 MacWorld Sneak Peak: The MacBook Wheel
Well folks, MacWorld begins today and everyone some people are excited to see if Apple drops some technology bombs on the world. And boy are they! Just check out the latest in their MacBook series -- the Macbook Wheel. It replaces that pesky keyboard with a touch-friendly iPod wheel. Whee! Wheel! Note: For you paint-chippers out there this is fake and the video was made by the Onion. But my god is it a good idea. I freaking love wheels. Including, but not limited to, the one of fortune.
Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard [theonion]
Thanks to Lisa, twellve, Tim, Fish and ITSELF, who all know you don't need keys to type. But you do need them to unlock doors.
Dec 9 2008 Sure, Why Not?: A Keyboard For Blondes
The Keyboard For Blondes is a real $50 product. What makes it for blondes? Well, it has some questionably clever keys in place of the standard ones, comes complete with audio, and a lovely pink coloration.
The all-pink keyboard swaps out standard keys with funnier, dumber key names. The backspace key now says "Oops!" and the entire row of function keys spells out USELESS KEYS. Hit the "$" sign and you get the sound of a cash register clinking.
Blondes can even get a little technical and use special keys that type out "OMG," "ALI" (Absolutely Love It!) or "XOXO." My favorite? The caps lock key now says: "Warning! size XXL letters."
ZOMG, too funny! Go here to see a high-res picture of the peripheral, then stab yourself for even thinking about buying it for somebody. Then buy it for somebody. Then stab yourself again for pissing away $50. Then return it. Then bandage yourself up for doing the right thing. Alternatively, I'll wear a blonde wig while we're having sex and you can call me dumb. Haha, no sneaking in the ass!
Product Page
via
OMG! It's a Keyboard for Blondes [msn]
Thanks to Romeo, Crystal and Jeff, who don't need keyboards because they can all type with their minds. Or voice recognition software, whatever.
Dec 8 2008 Why?: The Type-From-The-Back Keyboard
The Grippity is a real product that will be hitting shelves mid next year for about a hundred bones (big ones, like arm and leg bones -- not the little ones in your ear). I question its usefulness. But then again, I question the usefulness of my third leg too. It drags on the ground, so, I dunno, maybe it's for stability.
You get a full QWERTY keyboard that allows for eight-finger typing yoga straight from the back, while a couple of triggers behind double up as mouse buttons. The learning curve for this would be pretty steep as you will probably have to forget about everything you know and start over. Nice to see the Grippity come with an orientation sensor that enables the 60 QWERTY keys to double up as hot keys whenever the unit is flipped over.
Cool, yes, but why? Like drinking a gallon of milk in an hour, just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Unless a friend bets against you, in which case it becomes a matter of pride. And projectile vomiting.
Hit the jump to see a picture of the back.
Nov 6 2008 I Dare Say Old Bean, Beautiful Keyboard
Well, it's been a little while since we've kicked it oldschool style here on Geekologie, so let's take it back to '79 -- 1879 -- with this steampunkified ergonomic keyboard.
This keyboard was commissioned by a female client and has some elegant, feminine design features such as violet LEDs, an acanthus-leaf pattern etched into the brass, and a soft burgundy wrist pad that is removable for cleaning. It also has a built-in "buttonless" touchpad mouse in the center (tap anywhere to left-click and drag, tap in the top-right corner to right-click). This keyboard is interesting because the typing plane is actually tipped forward rather than back. It looks odd at first, but actually makes for a very comfortable typing position.
Sweet, but where do you put the coal? Plus -- wait a minute -- chicks are into this whole steampunk thing? *donning tophat and monocle* Laaaaadies? No, I'm not Mr. Peanut!
Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures, including what the original keyboard looked like.
Continue Reading " I Dare Say Old Bean, Beautiful Keyboard "
Oct 1 2008 USB Ferris Wheel Ferrises When You Type!
The USB Key-controlled Ferris Wheel is a little USB peripheral that spins around whenever you're typing and sends a couple cute little animals on a happy fun slide. Thanks to the marvel of modern technology, it can sense when you've stopped typing, and ceases movement. It costs $29 and is guaranteed entertainment for all ages.*
*Ages 5-80 excluded, small parts may pose a choking hazard for the elderly.
Sep 5 2008 Sure, Why Not?: The Enter Doorbell
The Enterbell is just that, an Enter key doorbell. Pretty straightforward. No ess curves required to understand this one. Unfortunately, it's currently only a concept created by Li Jianye. Wait a minute -- a concept? How hard is it to glue an Enter key to a regular freaking doorbell? Not very if you don't glue your hand down your pants first (I'm typing one-handed). Seriously though, if you want an Enter doorbell, don't wait for Li, just yank a key of your choice off a coworker's keyboard and glue that puppy on. Enter key alternatives include 'Home' and 'Insert'. Or, if you're not into the whole technology thing, you could just hang a sweet knocker. Knock knock. Who's there? Enter. Enter who? Me from behind, I'm feeling kinky!
Geeky Doorbell Speaks For Itself [ohgizmo]
Sep 3 2008 Say No To Carpal Tunnel: Bloody Stump Wrist Rests Perfect For Halloween, Zombie Decoys
Worried about developing carpal tunnel? Get a job where you don't have to type. But for the rest of us, there are wrist rests. This $15 set includes one hand and foot and is sure to get a rise out of undead coworkers. Of course, if you actually do work with zombies you should probably chop their heads off before they eat your brain. As a matter of fact, The Superficial Writer and I had to take a fire axe to the secretary just this afternoon when we caught her eating an arm.
UPDATE: Haha, it was a meatball sub. I swear, that marinara can be deceiving. Well, long story short, we called the coppers and blamed it on The Iwatchstuff Writer.
Hit the jump for a few more pictures of the gore.
Aug 29 2008 Cyber Clean Cleans Electronics, Tastes Great
Cyber Clean looks like, wait, is a slimeball and cleans your electronics. You just take the $8 Play-Doh, mash it into your keyboard, digital camera, phone, taint, etc. and then remove. Presto, clean and germ free! I just got a sample, I'll let you know how it goes.
UPDATE: j 09ctju j0954iy[ 0]kt [p9i34poi 34po]i0-] ln p;7816e6 erw761ew 786er w34[io pjkofp[i[12r c x213t43v2gv45 n67un,87m.8 0/-[=]/9+281708+ oi;jmio;im,,m
Keyboard's clean!
Cyber Clean cleansing goop: 'I press it on, and the mess is gone!' [dvice]
Aug 27 2008 The Crayola EZ Type: This Isn't Your Kid's Keyboard. Ha, Just Kidding, It Totally Is
The $30 Crayola EZ Type USB Keyboard is a great way to get youngsters familiar with colors, and also, important computer skills that will benefit them throughout their adult lives. Namely, surfing interweb porno. And, to make it even easier for the tykes, Crayola appears to have added a "Porn" key, right above the directional pad. I mean, it's got to be real, it's right there in the picture. What? Photoshop? Like a place that develops film? Never heard of it.
Joel's next keyboard: Crayola EZ Type [bbgadgets]
