Apparently an old lady in Spain took it upon herself to repair a valuable fresco of Jesus in a neighboring church. *eyeballing picture* AHHAHHAHHAHAHHAHHA! No word who ever told the old coot she had a lick of talent, but I think we can all agree they're the real criminal her... / Continue →

Is that a 'life back' guarantee? That's right folks, ten days to Judgement Day. That's the highest you can count on two hands provided you weren't born with extra digits (I have a half-pinky so I can round-up to eleven!). Apparently some religious zealots have unraveled th... / Continue →

Yes, that's really my local liquor store. Yes, they really open at six every morning. Yes, I've been there when they unlock the door. HAAAAAAAAPPY HOLIDAYS!! Hope you're all having a great break and haven't sleighed(!!!!!!!!11) any relatives yet. I came close to braining a... / Continue →

Some moron decided it would be a good idea to attempt stealing holy gas from a church van. Only problem is, Jesus wasn't having it. BURN HEATHEN, BUUUUURN! Blake King, 24, was reported in stable condition Wednesday in Vanderbilt University Hospital's Burn Center. Evansvill... / Continue →

This is a Starship Enterprise car emblem in the style of the 'Jesus Fish', 'Darwin Walking Fish', 'Dino Eating the Jesus Fish' and 'Sci-Fi' car emblems. They cost $8 from ThinkGeek and look great on a Prius. But that's it. Don't bother buying one if you drive anything else, ... / Continue →

God, apparently pissed that Jesus forgot to take out the trash (read: sinners), got so upset he lightning-bolted one of Jesus' statues ablaze. Now that's some tough love. Unconditional, but tough. The "King of Kings" statue, one of southwest Ohio's most familiar landmarks, h... / Continue →

Okay, so maybe it's not actually Jesus. Maybe it's just the face of a hobo. Hey -- hobos have faces too you know. And you know what else they have? A stench that'll singe your nose hairs. But they don't have souls, which is why it's okay to nudge them with your car if they... / Continue →

Still think it's cool being a fanboy? You're one of him. iDouche [cheezburger] Thanks to cookies 'n cream and Professor XXX, both of whom sound like porn stars. One possibly disabled.... / Continue →

You ever projectile vomited a rainbow of partially-masticated Peeps? Then you haven't lived. It's truly a magical feeling. And if you really wanna toss your biscuits, here's some Peepshi made from Peeps, Rice Krispie Treats and Fruit Roll Ups. DELICIOUSO! I'm think I'm gon... / Continue →

This a computer model of Jesus' face using information from the blood on the Shroud of Turin to create the image. He looks like somebody I know. The image has been created for the History Channel's upcoming special, "The Real Face of Jesus," which is set to air next week. ... / Continue →