Jul 25 2009 Lil' Anakin Skywalker Hates Star Wars, Sort Of
This is an interview with Jake Lloyd, the kid that played little Anakin Skywalker in Star Wars: Episode One (ten years ago!) talking about the effect being in the film has had on his life. SPOILER ALERT: Apparently he got made fun of in school and is blamed for ruining the movie. It made me kind of sad. I mean, I didn't cry or anything, but I did burn an effigy of George Lucas and cast a spell.
The Force Is Not With Him: Anakin Skywalker 10 Years Later [yahoomovies]
Thanks to FDSY and manders, who are thankful they weren't child actors, because now their lives would be all effed up.
Feb 3 2009 Cute Little Kid After Drugs At The Dentist
This is a video of David in the car after being gassed to have a tooth pulled. It almost made me want a child of my own until I realized you can't keep the little tykes gassed all the time. Or can you?
UPDATE: You can't. Come back to me little bro!
Thanks to Chuck Nunchuck and Aaron, who have never gotten a cavity. Search. Yet.
Jan 16 2009 Oh Wow -- An Even Worse Text-Messager
Remember the story earlier in the week about the girl that sent 14,528 text messages in a month? Well, it turns out she's not the only daughter I'd lock in the basement. Emilee Cox, a 14 year old from Clermont, Florida, sent and received 35,463 texts in a single month. Which, granted, were probably only half actually sent messages. But still, get a life. The best part of the interview:
Haha. Your dad was supposed to email me a picture of you to use. Do you know if he found one?
Uhm idk i think my sister is sending him one.
Got the photos. You are 14, right?
Yes i am.
Wow, even I found that creepy. Anybody else get the feeling the interviewer was at least partially responsible for Willy Wonka's third-quarter earnings?
Full text message interview with Clermont teen who had 35,463 text messages in a month [orlandosentinel]
Thanks to Jessica, who won't return my texts. WHAT'D I DO!?
Oct 28 2008 OLD!: UFO Guy Probably Tripping Constantly
You've probably seen this video before, but I hadn't. Does that make you better than me? Oh fo sho. Anyway, it's some guy that has sneaking acid onto planes down pat, rambling about a UFO siting in Chicago last winter. He reminds me of the rainbow lady, if the rainbow lady was a dude telling me my face was melting off.
Thanks to Miriam, who loves antiques as much as I do.
Sep 24 2008 Woops: Guy Mishandles Antique
I remember seeing this a while ago, but for those of you who have yet to witness its awesomeness, here it is: some guy showing off his one of a kind antique recording. Warning: he says shit and the host of the show made me punch through my monitor. But still, totally worth a watch.
Old man breaks one of a kind antique [googlevideo]
Thanks to chaosthirteen, who agrees there's just nothing funnier than another person's misfortune.
Aug 13 2008 Is This A Chupacabra? (Hint: Probably Not)
A Texas cop was on a routine fence inspection drive (WTF?) when he found a strange creature running in the road. He claimed it was hairless, had long back legs, short front legs, and a massive snout. So he started filming it with the car's camera. Hit the jump to see the video and hear an interview with the cop. So, what do you think, is it a chupacabra? No, it's not. How do I know? Simple. 1. The chupacabra is a creature of the night, they don't wake up from their daytime siesta until after nightfall. 2. It's nothing like what I imagined it should look like. Chupacabras should be half human, half lizard -- that would be freaking sweet. This thing is the bastard child of a coyote that stuck it to your neighbor's dog. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly 3. Is it sucking a goat's teet? I see no goat, I see no teet, I can't see my dick past my beer bellly anymore, and I see no chupacabra. *slams case closed for emphasis* Suck it, Matlock!
Hit it for the video.
Continue Reading " Is This A Chupacabra? (Hint: Probably Not) "
Aug 8 2008 The Last Video Game Obama Played Was...
Pong. Jesus, at least lie and say Super Mario Galaxy. But to Obama's credit, when McCain was asked the same question he answered "rolling a hoop down a dirt road with a stick", which, to the best of my knowledge, isn't even a video game. So the question remains: can we really trust a president that hasn't killed a hooker in Grand Theft Auto? The prosecution rests.
Geekologie Writer '08: Totally not afraid to kill hookers.
Hit the link to read a little interview with Obama with other, similar questions, like who gets to control the remote in his house (answer: HGTV).
Barack Obama: My Pop-Culture Favorites [entertainmentweekly]
Thanks Craig, you can be my running mate.
Aug 4 2008 Montauk Monster: Interview, Speculation
Well forks -- can I call you forks? Good, anyway my loyal sporks, the Montauk Monster mystery has been solved. Turns out it was my sister. Haha, Tracey -- that's what you get for mom and dad always loving you more. Fine, so nobody has identified what the hell the beast is yet. But there is another picture, along with three horrible Photoshop fakes (all included after the jump for your FAKE!ing pleasure). Oh, and an interview with the three women that found the thing. They say they've got the corpse decomposing in a box at a friend's place. SICK! And also, start the grill. I'd really believe this was all a hoax if the three chicks seemed mentally capable of tying their shoes. But they're not. I think they're Velcro girls. So, my spoony friends, check out all the media after the jump and draw your own conclusions. But remember -- even bloated, fugly monsters need love. Isn't that right, Tracey? HOLY MOTHER OF....PUT YOUR BAG BACK ON BEFORE I HIT YOU WITH A STICK!
Hit the jump for a new picture, three obvious Photoshoppings, and a painful interview with three life failures.
Continue Reading " Montauk Monster: Interview, Speculation "
Mar 17 2008 Net Gun Is Probably Safer Than A Taser
The Net-2000 Shooting Net Rod uses compressed air to launch a 52 square foot net at perps (or friends, tigers, etc.). The net can travel approximately 50 feet, so you can be a safe distance away (read: out of stabbing range) and still use the device. They sell for $419, but the net can be reinserted into the device and fired repeatedly, so it's got lots of replay value. Now being the intrepid reporter that I am I decided to track down Spiderman and see what he thought about the new net-slinging device. The interview follows.
Geekologie: So, Spidey. Do you mind if I call you Spidey? (Spiderman nods) Good. Have you seen this new net-gun they've got out?
Spiderman: No.
Geekologie: Well check it out. (plays Youtube video) Do you think this will affect your crime-fighting business at all?
Spiderman: Shit.
Geekologie: Is that a yes?
Spiderman: Shit.
Geekologie: Thank you for your time.
A close-up picture and a video of the gun in action after the jump.
