Oct 29 2009 I See You!: 8x Zoom Case For Nintendo DSi

Want an 8x zoom lens for your DSi because you're secretly a spy? Me neither. Want an 8x zoom lens for your DSi because you're in love with the receptionist at the free clinic and you want to candidly take pictures of her? You've got problems. But if you've also got $25 you can have the Nyko DSi Zoom Case, a case and lens that attach to your DSi and allow up to 8x zoom. Plus, it's super inconspicuous. Goodbye bow tie camera!

Hit the jump for a shot of it's zooming capabilities and all the accessories.

Continue Reading " I See You!: 8x Zoom Case For Nintendo DSi "

Oct 27 2009 No Beach For Me: 'Monster' Great White Almost Bites Smaller Great White In Half

This is a picture of a 10-foot great white shark that was almost bitten in half by what is believed to be a 20-foot great white -- just five feet short of Jaws and only seven short of my penis.

'It certainly opened up my eyes. I mean the shark that was caught is a substantial shark in itself,' says Jeff Krause of Queensland Fisheries.

The great white, the most dangerous creature in the sea, was still alive when hauled onto a boat near Deadman's Beach off north Stradbroke island.

'Whatever attacked and took chunks out of this big shark must be massive,' said 19-year-old surfer Ashton Smith. 'I've heard about the big one that's lurking out there somewhere.

'We're all being very, very cautious.'

Listen, I'm not saying I'm the world's manliest man, but for a lifetime supply of Australian beer and the chance to ride in a kangaroo's pouch, I will kill this shark anyway you want. Provided you want me to throw dynamite from a helicopter.

Great White nearly bit in half by an even BIGGER monster: Swimmers stay out of the water after warning over giant 20ft shark [dailymail]

Thanks to Ann, wes, Blastphemer, neo geo, Chris and salsa shark, who have all ridden sharks before and said it was a memorable experience.

Oct 21 2009 Good Job: Guy Builds Giant LEGO Castle

This is the Hoernersburg Castle, a LEGO castle constructed by NoName Hoerner because castles are awesome and he must have known I want to live in one. You can see a hi-res cross section of the castle HERE but it's really worth going to the website to see it in all its detail and read the little story he made up about it (plus videos). He even built a little town full of peasants down below the castle. So, in the metaphor of Geekologie, those people are you. Me? I'm the prince. The handsome one. That slays dragons. With his penis. You hear that, Puff? I'm coming for you! (Double entendre FTW)

Hoernersburg Lego Castle

Thanks to Matty, who can live in my castle provided he kill any dragons that may attack and tell everyone I did it.

Oct 19 2009 BOOM!: Massive Underwater Mine Detonation

This is an old-ass video of somebody's (the French's?) Navy detonating an underwater mine. The picture quality is pretty poor but the explosion is amazing and I'm not afraid to admit I got aroused. Twice. Plus I love how at the very end they realize their boat's gonna be capsized by the resulting wave and start going apeshit. Talk about poor planning -- that's something I would do! But it's cool because I'm a blogger and not a Navy.

Youtube

Thanks to Trogdolorian, who plans on traveling back in time to seize and burninate a castle.

Oct 14 2009 Now That's Fine Art: A Coat Hanger Gorilla

Apparently this is old but I don't care because it's the first time I've seen it and if you've seen it before then maybe YOU should have sent it to me earlier. That's right, YOU'RE the one to blame here. Jerk. Anyway, this behemoth was created entirely out of bent coat hangers by Scottish artist David Mach. And I think we can all agree, it speaks volumes. About how, you know, gorillas like to hang from stuff. Get it? Because of the hangers!! God, I slay me.

Coat Hanger Gorilla [reubenmiller]

Thanks to naas, who once Donkey Kong'ed two chicks at once and even though I don't know what that means I'm going to play along like I do. Sweeeet.

Oct 1 2009 For Sale: The World's Largest Gummi Bears

I have no idea if these five pound gummi bears are, in fact, the world's largest commercially available sugar bombs, but I do know they look rats and not bears.

The World's Largest Gummy Bear is the lion of the candy world. There is no candy more magnificent or more powerful. This five-pound beast is the equivalent of 1,400 regular sized gummy bears and packs a whopping 12,600 calories.

Its monstrous size is only matched by its enormous taste. The World's Largest Gummy Bear tastes just as delicious as its pint-sized counterpart.

Available in several flavors: blue raspberry, red cherry, and green apple. Hand-made in the USA.

Each bear will set you back $30 plus whatever you incur at the dentist. Which, if you play your cards right and flirt with the hygienist, could be a tank of nitrous. Just saying, A-WAHWAHWAHWAHWAHWAH. I feel like I'm on a spaceship!

Hit the jump for a moderately humorous commercial for the things.

Continue Reading " For Sale: The World's Largest Gummi Bears "

Sep 17 2009 I Could Eat It: World's Biggest Hamburger

What could be better after an article about a hideous dead monster than a food-related post? Happy lunching west coasters! Do they sell good falafel out there? I'd appreciate some if they do. Also, ripe avocado.

It's the world's biggest burger/heart-attacker and it comes courtesy of Steve Mallie of Southgate, Michigan. Guinness Book of World Records officially declared it the biggest after the burger weighed in at 185lbs.

Steve, who owns Mallie Sports Grill, said it took them 15 hours total to bake the burger, but it was worth it. Being in Guinness was always one of Steve's dreams. Steve said, ''I've worked my entire life to build this restaurant and being able to have the notoriety of Guinness makes it just that bit more rewarding.''

Steve plans to sell the burger at his restaurant for $499.

Who the hell's gonna buy a 200lb, week old hamburger (which, technically, appears to be a cheeseburger) for $500? You know, besides yo momma. BU-BU-BU-BURN! She's so fat she jumped and got stuck. OOOOOOOH, no I di-in't! I just did though is the thing.

KFed Just Came [dlisted]

Sep 9 2009 Huuuge Robot Statue Coming To South Korea

If you thought the 59-foot Gundam statue in Japan was large, boy were you wrong. Because South Korea is erecting a massive 364-foot statue (twice as large as the Statue of Liberty) of Robot Taekwon V (aka Voltar the Invincible). Scared? It gets worse. You see, the statue is being built for a new amusement park called Robot Land. Geez, talk about scarring your children for life. This is worse than coming downstairs on Christmas hoping for a Nintendo, only to find your mom gangbanging the Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny underneath the tree. Nobody even ate the cookies!

giant robot taekwon v statue will be six times as large as giant gundam statue [technabob]

Aug 30 2009 Dual Screen Laptops Here Before Christmas (You Hear That, Santa? You Fat Bastard You)

So apparently the dual 15.4" screened gGscreen Spacebook will be released in time for Christmas this year. Also, the elves I've been holding hostage. BUT ONLY IF SANTA MEETS MY DEMANDS.

The Alaska based company, started by Gordon Stewart (yep, that is where the G in gScreen comes from), is aiming its dual screen laptops at professional designers, filmmakers, photographers and really anyone who can't live without a dual screen for everyday productivity...The chassis (which we expect is at least 12 pounds) is built around the 15.4 inch screen (though the first units that come to market will have 16-inch or 17-inch screens) and its twin, identically sized screen slides out from behind the first using a uniquely designed sliding mechanism.

They will run Windows 7 and be powered by Intel Core 2 Duo processors, 4GB of RAM and high-end Nvidia GF900M GT discrete graphics. The plan is for fast 7,200 RPM hard drives and six or nine-cell batteries...."It is absolutely the opposite of a netbook," he told us. Yea that is no kidding with a price tag that he is hoping to keep under $3,000.

Damn! 30" of screen real estate, that's a lot. This thing isn't even a laptop any more. It's a muffintop. ZING!

GScreen's Dual-Screen Spacebook Coming Soon(ish) [gizmodo]

Thanks to Melissa, Mark and Mike, whose names all begin with the letter M. What? I NOTICE THESE THINGS! Did you get your hair cut? All of them, good one.

Jul 28 2009 Spoiled Brat Gets 98" TV In Ceiling Above Bed

Patti Deni, undoubtedly trying to make up for her lack of parenting (or child droppage), had a 98-inch StarGlas60 television installed in the ceiling above her teenage son's bed.

"Because it's so big and has such a wide viewing angle, Patty's son wouldn't have to lay flat on his back necessary to see the screen," Bohner explains.

"He and his friends can prop themselves just about anywhere and get a good view," adds Patty.

Wow. I didn't even have a TV in my bedroom until I was....okay, I don't think I've ever had a TV in my bedroom. And you know why? Because I don't sleep. LIKE EDWARD IN TWILIGHT. Only I'm dreamier. Somebody, anybody, back me up. DO IT NOW!

100-inch Screen Gets Mounted Flush in the Ceiling [electronichouse]

Thanks to naas and 42 y/o undead warlock, whose kids are lucky to not sleep under the dining room table.

Jul 1 2009 Like I Don't Have Enough To Worry About: Mega Ant Colony Is Taking Over The World

Ant colonies, like rabbits, are cuddly prolific. So prolific, in fact, scientists have just discovered a single interrelated colony of Argentine ants that has populated much of the globe. ATTAAACK!

The colony may be the largest of its type ever known for any insect species, and could rival humans in the scale of its world domination.

While ants are usually highly territorial, those living within each super-colony are tolerant of one another, even if they live tens or hundreds of kilometres apart. Each super-colony, however, was thought to be quite distinct.

But it now appears that billions of Argentine ants around the world all actually belong to one single global mega-colony.

So they're all relatives. But way more so than say, you and I are. So....it's cool if I touch your butt, right? I mean it's not like we're ants or anything.

Ant mega-colony takes over world [bbcnews]

Thanks to Alistair and 2MechanicalArms, who may or may not have fire ants in their pants. They do, I put them there.

Jul 1 2009 Great: Japan Plans Another Giant Robot Statue

Japan,

You know I love you. I love your sushi and your weird sexual fetishes. But what's up with the robot thing, bro? That shit ain't right. First Gundam and now a 59-foot Tetsujin 28-go (Gigantor)? I mean, I'm worried about you. One minute I'm in a diaper being spanked by a geisha (enjoying myself) and the next thing you know, BOOM, let's built a permanent giant robot statue in Kobe. Needless to say, I'm gonna have to reevaluate our relationship.

I hope we can work this out,

Your Geekologie Writer

P.S. Some more worn schoolgirl panties may help sway my decision.

Hit the jump for a 'making of' video.

Continue Reading " Great: Japan Plans Another Giant Robot Statue "

Jun 26 2009 That's More Like It: 7 Pound, 4.5" Thick Pizza

Andy is the man responsible for yesterday's 2-inch thick pizza. And he got pretty upset several of you commenters weren't feeling his efforts. So, to spite you, he made a bigger, 7 pound, 4.5-inch thick pizza yesterday. Take that, naysayer!

Okay, I saw that my pizza I posted a couple of hours ago got posted on Geekologie, that's cool, I read that blog on a daily basis. But apparently most of the readers over there wasn't that impressed. And some even thought it was fake, and that's just ridiculous. So I felt I had to do another thick pizza. So here we go:

340g pineapple (190 kcal)
70g asparagus (14 kcal)
360g bacon (1152 kcal)
750g cheese (2700 kcal)
275g majonays (1980 kcal)
170g shrimp (145 kcal)
400g ham (520 kcal)
200g salami (780 kcal)
600g tomato paste + dough (1098 kcal)
1 egg (90 kcal)

All in all, this bad boy has 8669 kcal in it and weigh 7.08 lbs (3215g)

Happy now? I swear, some of you are so hard to please. Especially the ladies. I don't know know what I'm doing -- I get lost down there!

Hit the jump for a couple pre-baking shots.

Continue Reading " That's More Like It: 7 Pound, 4.5" Thick Pizza "

Jun 23 2009 Halo On The Dallas Cowboys Video Wall

This is someone playing Halo for the XBox 360 on the Dallas Cowboys stadium video wall. It is fairly large. Not as big as my TV, but close. Per tipster Mike the Robot Destroyer:

Long time follower of your site. I check it about 400 times a day to keep apprised of all activity pertaining to robots and their very disturbing evolutionary path towards the ability to kill all humanity. We both know they are already self aware and feel the urge to kill us, they are just waiting for us to give them the tools. I'm convinced robot scientists have been hypnotized by mind robots - either that, or robot scientists are really just future robots sent back in time to invent future robots..... hmmmmmm

No idea what that has to do with playing giant Halo, but at least he's got his head in the right place.

Youtube

Thanks Mike the Robot Destroyer, now get out there and make your Geekologie Writer proud!

Jun 14 2009 Golden: ZOMG, WTF Are Those Things?!

Impressive, but mine drag on the pavement.

Loose In DC Tonight: The Mother of All Truck Nutz [wonkette]

Thanks to Spoonman, who may or may not want to give this vehicle a physical.

May 28 2009 Frickin' Huge!: Full-Size Blue Whale Website

This full-sized blue whale website comes to us from the Whale and Dolphin Conservation Society that urges everyone to "EAT MOR CHIKIN". Kidding, those are the Chick-Fil-A cows. Damn, now I want a sandwich. Ladies? Anyway, the website was designed to give the average computer user a sense of awe for just how large the sandwich you better be making me should be. Crazy, huh? Those whales are huuuuuuge. And as a guy whose had his fair share of BBW lovers: motion of the ocean, baby. I don't even know what that means, but I just bought a sailboat!

Website

Thanks to Shelby, who is a special f/x artist and could make even me look cool. On fire. While exploding. Riding a shark.

May 15 2009 Universe's Largest Black Hole Discovered

Allegedly astronomers have discovered the universe's most massive black hole. How massive? Think my ex-wife's gaping pie-hole times three.

Whatever gave birth to this monster can be real proud. The biggest black hole in the universe weighs in with a respectable mass of 18 billion Suns, and is about the size of an entire galaxy.

The biggest black hole beats out its nearest competitor by six times. Fortunately, it's 3.5 billion light years away, forming the heart of a quasar called OJ287.

So, what does this mean for us? WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! Quick, everybody, foil helmets, foil helmets! *click* Haha, you all looked so stupid.

18 Billion Suns -Biggest Black Hole in Universe Discovered--and it's BIG! A Galaxy Classic [dailygalaxy]

Thanks to interstellar vacuum salesman, who could sell that black hole a stairs attachment even if it doesn't have any.

Apr 26 2009 3...2...1...: Largest Model Rocket Blasts Off

Remember the world's largest model rocket? Yeah, well it blasted off yesterday without a hitch (or Space Bat). This is a picture of the 36-foot tall, 1,600lb beast about to take to the skies. There's a couple more pictures and a video of the launch after the jump, so be sure to check that out. But not my girlfriend, or I'll punch you in the eyes.

Hit the launch button for the rest.

Continue Reading " 3...2...1...: Largest Model Rocket Blasts Off "

Apr 20 2009 Largest Model Rocket Ready For Blast Off

I did absolutely zero research to determine if this 36-foot tall, 1,600lb model rocket built by Steve Eves is, in fact, the largest ever, but that's only because I've already won numerous prizes for investigative journalism and figured I'd give somebody else a chance. I jest -- I'm just stoned to bejesus.

The mini-Saturn V is powered by nine rocket motors including 8 13,000ns N-Class motors and a single 77,000ns P-Class motor.

The single stage flight should reach an altitude somewhere between 3,000 and 4,000 feet, and at apogee the rocket will separate into three parts and return to Earth via the assistance of various parachutes. In the end Eves estimates he's invested about 1,500 hours into the project with a total budget of around $25,000, though that will actually be covered by various sponsors come the April 25th launch event.

Nice. Reminds me of the time at Space Camp we built model rockets and launched them off with crickets as payload. I remember my cricket (Chirpy McHandicapped) only had one back leg. Well, before liftoff. After liftoff he had one back leg on fire. R.I.P. Chirpy, say hi to Space Bat for me.

Largest Model Rocket In History Is 36 Feet Tall, Weighs Over 1,600 Pounds [ohgizmo]

Thanks to Stephen, who once put a rocket's fin on crooked and the rocket went all crazy like PPSSSSHOOWWOWOWOWWOWWSSSSSSSS *pop*

Apr 8 2009 It Was Frickin' Huge: 54,324 Piece LEGO DSi

LEGO artist Sean Kenney was commissioned by Nintendo of America to build a giant DSi for display at the Nintendo World Store in NYC. So that's what he did. And here it is, in all it's 54,324 piece glory. Sadly, it doesn't work, which means that it's forever frozen with that picture of a cat on it. Which, while cute, is nowhere near as cute as my cat. Isn't that right, Mr. Whiskers? I swear, you are such a cutie with a booty -- come give daddy kissies! No, I didn't say asshole my face, I said kissies!

Hit the jump for a bunch of closeups and a 45-second time-lapse video of the build.

Continue Reading " It Was Frickin' Huge: 54,324 Piece LEGO DSi "