Aug 28 2009 Kitty Noises, Autotune Used To Make Song
This is song made using videos of kitty sounds that have been auto-tuned (think Kanye West, but with less bitching and whining) to produce some funky fresh beats. Yes, I am hip to your jive. I'm a cool cat, you dig? I jest, I am a warm dog. And speaking of which -- in college I lived in a house with five other guys, and we had this one roommate who would always boil hotdogs in the same pot of water and then lid the pot and save the water for next time. Dude got mad pissed if you even joked about touched his hotdog water. And that pot would sit there on the stove for sometimes a week between boilings. He was convinced it gave each subsequent batch of dogs more flavor. We were convinced it gave us dysentery.
Thanks to Tom and Edd, who once made a song with their voices synthesized to sound like Chipmunks but then deleted it when they realized that shit's not cool.
Jan 20 2009 Admit It, You're Lazy: A Cup Noodle Machine
Why you'd need a vending machine for a product that only requires hot water and three minutes to be ready for consumption is beyond me. Yet, here it is, a Cup Noodle (I always thought it was Cup-O-Noodles) vending machine.
It's small enough to fit on a counter top, and includes a hot water thermos and storage for up to four Cup Noodle bowls with a dispenser. It even has an automatic timer that'll beep when three minutes is up and your food is ready to eat.
Jesus, it's called a microwave, folks. And who else has accidentally eaten part of the styrofoam cup while downing a Cup Noodle all drunk? Go ahead, admit it -- nothing to be ashamed of. HAHA, you freaking ate the cup! To your credit though, I wouldn't trust you with a fork either.
Nissin offers introverts compact cup noodle vending machines [tokyomango]
Thanks to Niki, who stopped eating Ramen in college because she got to look at some under a microscope and it looked too noodley.
Sep 12 2008 It's A Sign!: Global Warming Is Real, Phallic
Finally, photographic evidence that proves, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the North Pole has melted and Santa's penis floated out to sea.
Hit it for the uncensored ice junx.
Continue Reading " It's A Sign!: Global Warming Is Real, Phallic "
Jul 17 2008 Epic Failure: Kid Riding Jet Ski In Hot Tub
This is a short video of an asscap riding a jet ski in a hot tub. It's every bit the epic failure you'd expect. The whole time I was waiting for a cruise ship to come along and crush the dumb bastard to death, but my prayer went unanswered. Something about God hating me.
UPDATE: I'd like to apologize to all of you who were misled into thinking that Captain Numbnuts of the USS Special Ed was going to hurt himself by the inclusion of "epic failure" in the title and post. If it's any consolation, there was nobody wishing him more harm than myself. And also, YAAAAAAAAA! *UMPH* -- there, I just punched myself in the go-go-gadget-gonads for you.
Jun 24 2008 I'm Buying: Man Auctions Off Entire Life (Including Pride And Dignity) On eBay
Ian Usher is a 44-year old Australian that's selling his entire life on eBay. No, you don't get to kill him, but you do get his house, car, motorcycle, hot tub, friends, job, grill, pictures, computer, underwear, pride, and self respect. The auction ends on Sunday and is already up to about $300,000. Ian is holding the auction after his 12-year relationship with some chick name Laura dissolved and left him broken-hearted. He's looking for a clean start and will begin his new life with nothing but the clothes on his back and the proceeds from the auction (he's hoping for around $500,000). When asked why the relation went sour, Ian replied, "She started kangarooing some other dude. She wanted to settle down and thought I was too impulsive -- the kind of guy that would sell his entire life on eBay." Boy, you sure showed her!
Hit the jump for a bunch of pictures of stuff included in the auction, along with a link to the auction, his blog explaining the situation, and a yahoo news article.
Continue Reading " I'm Buying: Man Auctions Off Entire Life (Including Pride And Dignity) On eBay "
Sep 18 2007 Homemade Pigeon Deterrent Scares Birds
This guy set up a motion activated sprinkler to keep pigeons from crapping up the ledge between his pool and hot tub. While I can understand this working in a garden by spraying animals before they eat something, I question its use here. I mean the first thing I do when I think I'm being shot at is empty my bladder and bowels, then cry. I'm sure the pigeons do the same. His only hope is that each individual bird learns it's lesson. *BANG* Not again. *sniffle, sob*
Homemade Pigeon Deterrent Scares Birds [gizmodo]
