Nov 20 2009 NSFW NSFW: WTF DID I JUST WATCH?! SERIOUSLY, W.T.F. DID I JUST WATCH?!
WARNING: NSFW VIDEO IS NSFW
This is the highly, highly, HIGHLY NSFW music video for the Flair's 'Truckers Delight'. I can't even begin to describe to you how dirty I felt after watching it. Unless you've ever swam in pig shit and then showered in vomit afterward. In which case, Jesus, join another pool.
Thanks Smee and Kaerus, I'll split my therapist's bills between the two of you.
Nov 16 2009 WTF WAS THAT?: Boy Loses His Cool, Cries And Punches Wall Over Modern Warfare 2
NOTE: NSFW DUE TO LANGUAGE. WATCH IT WITH HEADPHONES ON OR THE VOLUME LOW.
There's rock bottom, and then they're webcam-ing yourself crying and punching the wall over your disappointment about Modern Warfare 2. Jesus, kid, fix yourself a spot of tea and calm the f*** down. Oh, and for the love of God: lose the milk mustache.
Thanks to kweks, who had a meltdown about the new Super Mario Bros. for Wii but was smart enough not to tape it.
Nov 16 2009 WOW: Amazingly Amazing Tauntaun Costume
I hate out of season articles as much as you do, but this tauntaun Halloween costume by Scott Holden was too good not to post. Plus, I'd have already forgotten about it by the time Halloween rolls around next year (booze).
Scott made this amazing costume from scratch. Using designs made in Solidworks, he started to outline the Tauntaun. The head mold was detailed using clay, then a mold was made , then it was cast, and on and on. The horns were made in almost the same manner.
Never thought an animal would have a chassis did you? Well this beast does! This component too made completely from scratch and the best bit of this costume? The costume walks and is not a static display. Scott had to fabricate his own stilts to make this beast complete.
Good looking, Scott! The costume, not you. I mean, you're handsome and all, but that's not what this is about -- this is about the costume. But yours eyes....it's like you can see right through my computer screen and know I'm not wearing anything but a smile and Ewok pelt.
Hit the jump for a bunch of the process and a video of the costume in action.
Continue Reading " WOW: Amazingly Amazing Tauntaun Costume "
Nov 14 2009 Impressive: 300,000 Birds Perform Air Ballet
I have no idea who the hell can tell that's 300,000 birds, but I'm running with it. And by running I mean flying. Just like those birds. Except less graceful. But equally naked! Think of me as like the Eleventh Plague of Egypt, if the Eleventh Plague of Egypt were a naked man standing on the roof flapping his arms. I'm coming for you, Pharoah! *caw caw!*
It's a bird! It's a cloud! It's a bird cloud [yahoobuzz]
Nov 13 2009 Yeah, No: Video From Top of The Burj Dubai
This is a video taken from the top of the Burj Dubai, the tallest building in the world, at 2,684 ft. Jesus, that's half a mile. Can you believe humans are even capable of this? I can't -- I shit my swim trunks on the high dive once. But, to my credit, I did do one hell of a cannonball.
This Video From the Tip Top of the Burj Dubai Makes Me Sick to My Stomach [gizmodo]
Thanks to Rick, who has dived off higher platforms into a cup of water. I mean, he died, but he did do it.
Nov 11 2009 Awesome: Grand Theft Auto Meets Frogger
Youtube user daneboe, the same guy who created the Contra vs. Duck Hunt and Mortal Kombat vs. Donkey Kong videos is back at it, this time with some Grand Theft Auto vs. Frogger action (and bonus Sonic vs. Pac-Man after the jump!). And, as I've come to expect, they are awesome. Not as awesome as that time I drove my Big Wheels through a pile of burning leaves, but not everything awesome ends with a trip to the ER. Only the really REALLY awesome ones.
Hit the jump for Sonic vs. Pac-Man.
Continue Reading " Awesome: Grand Theft Auto Meets Frogger "
Nov 6 2009 Holy Smoking Cans: 5,000 Volt Can Crusher
Bob David went and built himself a 5,000 volt can crusher just because he could. That's what I love about people: they do things for no reason. Also, some of them smell good. But don't let 'em catch you sniffing! If you care how Bob built the thing you can watch the first two minutes, but you look ADD-y, so skip to 2:15 for the action. Cool, huh? Now, let's snort some Adderall.
Nov 6 2009 Impressive: Hasbro Star Wars Diorama Contest
Unbeknownst to me Hasbro has been holding a Star Wars diorama contest. This is a sample of one of the finalists titled 'Captain Solo Awaits His Fate in the Carbon Freezing Chamber'. I would have gone with 'Hey, You Said This Place Was a Strip Club', but whatever. Hit the jump to see the rest of Han getting frozen and the four other finalists. Then, go vote if you want to. Or don't, it's no skin off my back. But I do wish it was the skin off my pudding, because I can't stand that shit. WHICH IS WHY I NORMALLY STICK TO SNACK PACKS. *ahem* Mom.
Hit the jump for a bunch more diorama.
Continue Reading " Impressive: Hasbro Star Wars Diorama Contest "
Nov 2 2009 Spanish Space Hotel Still A Go For 2012
Intergalactic Suites, the $4.4 million per 3-night space hotel (you better change the sheets!) that we first reported on back in 2007, is apparently still a go for a 2012 grand opening. I'm skeptical. Also, on the waiting list. God I'm rich!
Galactic Suite Ltd, set up in 2007, hopes to start its project with a single pod in orbit 280 miles above the earth, with the capacity to hold four guests and two astronaut-pilots.
It will take a day and a half to reach the pod -- which Claramunt compared to a mountain retreat, with no staff to greet the traveler."When the passengers arrive in the rocket, they will join it for three days, rocket and capsule. With this we create in the tourist a confidence that he hasn't been abandoned. After three days the passenger returns to the transport rocket and returns to earth," he said.
Interesting, but I can think of a better business model. Namely, taking the customers to the hotel, then pulling away and threatening to leave them there if they don't pay another $10 million (you know they've got it). Geekologie Writer LLC: 2010 Startup of the Year!
Space hotel says it's on schedule to open in 2012 [msnbc]
Thanks to thanks to, who made me do that on purpose to make me look stupid EVEN THOUGH I KNOW ITS YOU FDSY.
Oct 30 2009 Gallery of Stormtroopers On Their Day Off
This is a shot in a series of photographs on Flickr titled '365 Days of Stormtroopers', which features a new picture of Stormtroopers enjoying a day off every day from April 3rd, 2009 to April 3rd, 2010 (I guess every day's a vacation since the destruction of the second Death Star). There are currently 210 pictures in the series and every one is very well done. Granted, not as well done as this tauntaun burger, but I like my meat like I like ex's house: burnt.
Hit the jump for a couple more of my favorites and another link to the massive Flickr gallery.
Continue Reading " Gallery of Stormtroopers On Their Day Off "
Oct 28 2009 Road Rash: Crazy Four-Wheeled Motorcycle
The 2010 Cosmos 4RW V8 Muscle Bike sports four 17-inch wheels, a 250 cubic inch V8 producing 350 horsepower and an extra helping of deathtrap. Want one? Expect to spend $93K. Unless you're Batman, in which case it comes standard in the front end of a Tumbler. Unless he's been drinking, in which case it may come smashed in the grill of an 18-wheeler.
Is a motorcycle still a motorcycle if it has four wheels? [dvice]
Thanks to Chris, who drives a four-wheeled moped which I think we can safely assume has never felt a woman on its Italian pleather seat.
Oct 28 2009 Just Ordered Two Cases: Dinosaur Condoms
That's right, dinosaur shaped condoms. Available from Willy Wardrobe (probably NSFW, but also has a bunch of other novelty condoms), each Stegosaurus E-Rex will set you back £2.50 (~$4) and is not recommended for re-use (even though you and I both know you totally will anyway).
A bit of a sexual fossil? Then this dinosaur condom is for you!
Warning: Sold as novelty only. Product may be used during intercourse although there is no guarantee that it will prevent pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases.Also, not responsible for lost spines.
Okay, so I made that last part up. Still, you've got to wonder. WONDER WHY NOBODY WAS MAKING THESE EARLIER! Plus, they like a perfect fit to me. Pfft, don't even act like your penis doesn't have feet too.
Thanks to Starchitect, Ezrail, david, DatsMark, Xavire, Ross, John, sara, Jody and clipper, for knowing me all too well.
Oct 21 2009 Holy Amazing: POP-UP Book LEGO Scene
This is a LEGO scene constructed in the form of a pop-up book. It's absolutely amazing and has a giant pagoda that folds together in the middle. I couldn't even imagine building something so impressive so I'm just going to hang my head in shame and cry into this pile of DUPLO blocks. Yes, DUPLO -- I'm not allowed to play with LEGO. IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO CHOKE ON THEM THEN WHY DO YOU MAKE THEM LOOK LIKE CANDY?!
Thanks to david and Lee, who once popped out of a pop-up book at a birthday party and scared a bunch of children.
Oct 16 2009 Highly Questionable Japanese Sniper Prank
Is there anything funnier than tricking a Japanese man into a meeting and then faking the death of everybody else in the room by sniper fire? No. Unlessssss the alleged gunman then bursts in and puts his weapon to the man's head and pulls the trigger. Seriously, you're sick, Japan (keep the freaky Hentai coming).
Thanks to Closet Nerd and Harry, whose parents don't allow them to watch Japanese TV for fear of them becoming morally corrupt.
Oct 16 2009 Coool!: Earth And Jupiter In The Same Photo
This is an amazing photograph of the earth (and moon) and Jupiter (and a few of its moons) in the same frame. Now I know what you're thinking, and no, God didn't take this one.
Sometimes the planets line up in such a way that you can see Earth and Jupiter in the same wide-angle shot. That is, if you were aboard the Mars Global Surveyor on May 22, 2003. When the Mars Orbiter Camera snapped this unique view, Earth was 86 million miles away, and Jupiter was 600 million miles away.
Wow, that really gets you thinking, doesn't it? Like about how far objects in space are from one another. Really far. And speaking of which -- will one of you be so kind as to walk the remote over here?
Hit the jump to see a diagram explaining how the planets were aligned.
Continue Reading " Coool!: Earth And Jupiter In The Same Photo "
Oct 16 2009 Wicked Transformer Halloween Decorations
This is a video of some guy in Cleveland that made giant Bumblebee and Optimus Prime Halloween decorations. They are most impressive. Granted, some teenage jerks in the neighborhood are gonna wreck them, but they're still cool while they last. Not unlike snowmen. Which, funny story: last winter I saw one with a hotdog for a nose! I mean, who doesn't have carrots?!?! I suspect his eyes were dog turds.
Thanks to kat, Dave and Paul, who are all ready to transform and trick-or-treat the hell out.
Oct 15 2009 Fail: Drunkest Man Ever Tries To Buy Beer
MUST WATCH. Sad and funny at the same time -- my favorite!
This is what may very well be the world's drunkest (plus pills!) man attempting to buy beer from a convenience store. His perseverance is amazing. Don't get me wrong, he still fails miserably, but he's a hero in my book. Because, sometimes, trying is enough.
Drunkest Guy Ever Goes for More Beer [break]
Thanks to Eddie, who's been known to stand outside the convenience store at 7AM waiting for it to open so he can buy beer. Been there, Eddie, been there.
Oct 14 2009 WTF Was That?: Amazing Paper-Flipping Animation Video Thingy Is Slightly NSFW
NOTE: Video is arguably NSFW due to cartoon violence and what may or may not be a penis (it's a penis. It's 100% a penis) from 0:30 to 0:35.
I have absolutely no idea what I just saw even though I watched it five times in a row. I really loved the style, but the subject matter gave me siesta-mares this afternoon. I know I promised I wouldn't nap on the job anymore, but a siesta's different. It's cultural.
Crazy Headsploding Animation Defies Any Classification [gizmodo]
Oct 11 2009 Topless Asian Man Busts Moves/Shows Off His Neo-Geo Collection (Plus Bare Ass!)
NOTE: Double shot of bare ass at 1:24 and 1:28. You can't get that at Starbucks!
This is a video of some crazed Asian man dancing his ass off while displaying some of rarer Neo-Geo titles in his collection. It's by far one of the most disturbing things I've seen, but I can't help but watch it again and again. It has something to do with the way he dances, which is technically amazing. You can't learn those moves in gym class! I don't care how many times you offer to stay after school and help pick up the orange cones.
NSFW: Topless Weirdo Shows Off His Neo-Geo Collection [kotaku]
Thanks to Aisha, who once danced the devil under the table and then stole the bitch's horns. Nice, I want to wear them!
Oct 9 2009 I Can't Even Believe That's Real: Amazing Bullet Impacts At 1,000,000 Frames/Second
A million FPS, is that even possible? Because that's crazy if it is (also, black magical). I'll probably never do anything a million times, let alone in a single second. But regardless, this is a 10:00 video of bullets doing their thing in super slow-motion. There's some pretty sweet glass breaking action at 4:30, some ballistic gel destruction right after, and some absolutely amazing footage of bullets disintegrating against a steel plate starting at 6:20. It's just so....beautiful. I can honestly say I've never wanted to be shot so badly. Anybody here in a gang?!
Thanks to jamal, who has never missed the bullseye or a day of class. Good attendance AND a sharp shooter -- I like your style, jamal.
