Nov 20 2009 They're All The Rage: On/Off Head Switches
Want to look like you're a cyborg or some shit? I couldn't imagine why (unless you want me to brain you with a crowbar), but if you do, just glue an on/off switch to the back of your head like Dominic Wilcox did. But, WARNING: your hats won't fit the same! Neat idea, Dominic, but this is exactly the kind of thing that'll get you killed if you roll with the crew that I do. THAT SAID, I JUST I JUST HOOKED MYSELF UP WITH A VOLUME KNOB. WHAT? OH SORRY -- SOMEBODY TURNED ME UP TO 11!!
Hit the jump for a picture of the installation process.
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Nov 17 2009 BURN IT DOWN!: The Bender Head House
The Bender House looks like Bender's dome from Futurama. If you've never seen Futurama I'm going to assume you don't have a television or internet so you probably aren't even reading this. Unless they print out copies of Geekologie and distribute them in Africa, which, I think we can all agree, is the best idea you've ever heard. Anyway, I'm gonna go ahead and start taking bets on how many beers it takes me to crash out of Bender's right eye and lay bleeding in the driveway -- oh -- oh -- *crash* Fourteen and a couple buttery nipples. Now somebody call 911 411, this guy needs a pizza.
I want this house [warmingglow]
Thanks to Marcie, who used to live in a house that looked like Robbie the Robot but it mysteriously burnt down. *whistling* Weird.
Oct 1 2009 Pew Pew Pew!: Fallout 3 Laser Rifle Replica
Harrison Krix of Volpin Props (who also made the amazingly realistic ADAM syringe) went and constructed an accurate replica of the AER9 Laser Rifle from Fallout 3 out of wood. In 30 hours. With only minimal black magic. I want it. After all, life is all about the pews. Obvioiusly, I'm talking about those chairs at church. I can't stand and pray for shit!
Build Page [volpinprops] (with a ton of pics, including the build)
and
Make your own Fallout 3 laser rifle for fun and profit [dvice]
Thanks to Trav and SC2ZERGOMG, who once shot each other in the eyes with lasers and are now both legally blind. Good going, guys. At least you get eyepatches!
Aug 17 2009 Canadians Create Mathematical Model For Successfully Surviving Zombie Apocalypse
Since there's no hockey on some Canadian mathematicians have shifted their efforts to creating a mathematical model for surviving the zombie uprising. And you said nothing good ever came out of Canada! That guy, right there -- he's the one that said it. GET HIM, CANUCKS!
Anyway, the model focuses on modern zombies, which are "very different from the voodoo and the folklore zombies." It takes into account the possibility of quarantine (could lead to eradication, but unlikely to happen) and treatment (some humans survive, but they still must coexist with zombies), but shows that there is only one strategy likely to succeed: "impulsive eradication."
"Only sufficiently frequent attacks, with increasing force, will result in eradication, assuming the available resources can be mustered in time," they concluded.
Pfft, I came up with a better model than that. It goes like this: me + shovel = zombie - head. Zombie - head = that zombieskin rug I've always wanted in front of the fire place! Now, who wants to make out on top of it?!? I'm not sick, you're sick.
Mathematical Model for Surviving a Zombie Attack [wired]
Thanks to Dahbie, who will survive the apocalypse no matter what because of jet propulsion (I'm coming with you).
May 25 2009 The Cap-Sac Is A Fanny Pack For Your Head
The Cap-sac came out in 1987 but didn't sell very well because there was no internet then. But now, thanks to a magical series of tubes, the Cap-sac is back to the future and helping people get laid and store things at the same time. It's a fanny pack for your head, yo. Available in both neon and non-neon colors, the $13 hats promise to add a bit of retro flair and storage space to almost any domepiece. I wear two at once because I'm so fresh and also I don't like things in my pockets that make me jingle. You hear that, Santa? I can hear your ass coming from a mile away!
Hit the jump for a couple more shots because I roll deep.
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Apr 30 2009 I'd Buy One: The NES Controller Mouse
Sadly, the NES Controller Mouse is only conceptual. But, if there's enough consumer interest, I'll step forward and manufacture them myself (read: collect money for pre-orders and skip the country). Capitalism baby, gotta love it. Also, self-conscious strippers and breakfast cereal options.
nintendo nes controller mouse: when can i buy one? [technabob]
Thanks to Matt, Julian and RaDe, who know Count Chocula and Cap'n Crunch make the world go round. Illuminati.
Apr 14 2009 Dangerously Delicious: The BA-K-47
The BA-K-47 is a full size replica of an AK-47 made out of bacon (and wire). Quick, put it in my mouth and pull the trigger! Mmmm, lardy!
We had our first annual Bacon Day this past Saturday. As a huge fan of bacon, and all the great bacon blogs out there, I decided it was time for me to make my own bacon creation. I came up with the BA-K-47, a 1:1 scale AK-47 made out of bacon. It took a total of eight hours to create, a lot of bacon, and a blowtorch... oh yeah, and our good friend beer helped too.
ZOMG -- you know beer too?! The trouble that guy and I used to get into! Like yesterday when he told me to steal my neighbor's car and drive it into a ravine! And right now when he told me to type that despite on ongoing investigation. Hold on, door.
UPDATE: COPS -- DAMN YOU BEER!
UPDATE: You know I didn't mean that. Now get over here and give daddy a little sippy-sippy.
Hit the jump for a whole bunch more.
Apr 8 2009 Best Mouse Ever: The LED Message Mouse
The $21 LED message mouse has an LED laden fan in it that spins around and displays whatever barely decipherable message you want, while at the same time keeping your hand sweat-free during a particularly intense "gaming" (read: fapping) session. Granted, you won't be able to actually see your message while the device is in use, but that's a small price to pay for the awesome you know is just on the other side of your hand. Obviously, I'm talking about your hairy palm. Seriously bro, give it a rest.
Hit the jump for another shot and a video of the rodent in action.
Mar 24 2009 Own Your Own Velociraptor Trophy Mount
Remember the life-like Dilophosaurus mount that Geekologie Reader Josh made? Well he's at it again, this time with a 1:1 scale velociraptor head!
Up for auction is a full size replica of the Velociraptor from Jurassic Park. It measures 28 inches from the nose to base of the mount. It is made of high quality poly urethane resin that has been painted and sealed. The dinosaur is mounted to a wooden base that can be mounted to a wall like a trophy animal.
Josh is selling the head on eBay. Current bidding is at $200 with 6 days remaining. Now I really hope none of you outbid me, because this thing would look perfect mounted in my trophy room. And by 'trophy room' I obviously mean bedroom. And when I say 'bedroom' I'm talking the actual bed. And by bed I mean my ass. Sexy time!
Hit the jump for a couple more pictures and another link to the auction.
Feb 20 2009 Woman's Weave Proves Tighter Than A Speeding Bullet, Saves Life From PEW
A woman's tightly woven hair weave allegedly saved her life from a gunshot fired by her ex-boyfriend.
The 20-year-old Kansas City woman told police Juan Kemp, her ex-boyfriend, opened fire on her while she was inside her car at a Kansas City convenience store Wednesday night.
Bonds' back window and tail light were shot out, but it is what police found in her weave that is amazing. Detectives pulled a spent bullet from the back of Bonds' head. It had become lodged in her weave.(Hairdresser Kim) Walton said while the weft is the strongest part of the weave and would be the most difficult to penetrate, she finds it hard to believe a weave could stop a bullet.
Captain Brokenheart of the USS Fails At Life and his friend were later arrested. Now, physicists out there: is this even possible? I feel like it had to be a ricochet or something. There's just no way. But, if there is a way, this guy needs a weave!
Woman's hair weave stops bullet [woai]
and
News Video [yahoonews]
Thanks to Julian, who once caught a speeding bullet in his teeth but lost a filling.
Jan 21 2009 I Like: A Sweet LEGO-Inspired T-Shirt
This is a completely unlicensed t-shirt from Fuzzy Ink that features a LEGO minifig trying on different heads. It'll set you back $16 if you want one and comes in three color choices: gray. Which head would you wear? I'm leaning towards the one with the eyepatch or the hooker. Oh, now I can't decide. F*** it, I'm wearing them one on top of the other. "Yaaaar, you scurvy-ridden seaslugs!" "Handjobs, $10."
Thanks to Justin, who bought one and promises to wear it on twin-day so we match.
Jan 20 2009 BOOM, Headshot!: Sniping App For iPhone
Now you can shoot things with better accuracy thanks to BulletFlight, a $10 application available for the iPhone and iPod Touch.
Users can mount their iPod touch to their rifle, and then use the iPod's touch-screen to tap in details about the wind conditions, ammunition type, distance to the intended target and even the wind speed.
"Unlike other apps, BulletFlight does not output information in table format," says the application's iTunes page. "What it does do is dynamically give you the solution you need now to take that shot."
Really? Attaching an iPhone to a sniper rifle? Terrorists everywhere will laugh at you. Thanks but no thanks, I prefer to do my sniping the old-fashioned way -- with a powerful burning laser. PEW PEW!
Sniper rifle software launched for iPod touch [telegraph]
Thanks to Tony and Larry, who only make heads explode with knowledge, son.
Jan 4 2009 Russian Roulette: The Nokia Gun Phone
This is a conceptual Nokia gun phone made by somebody in Photoshop. It's fake. Mad fake. Faker than the ID I use to buy booze (I'm 16). Because no phone company has the gigantor cojones it would take to manufacture an actual handgun-phone. And I think we can all agree, that's a fundamental problem with today's society. That's why I outsourced the manufacture of a gun-phone to a friend of mine. And I've got to tell you, this shit looks legit. *BRRRING* Oh, if you'll excuse me -- I need to take this. *BANG* Oh. Uh-oh. Listen, I've gotta run to the vet real quick.
Gun Phone Concept [uberphones]
