Jun 2 2009 Winner Of Baby Race Crawls For Laptop

First of all, I bet on baby races all the time ($40 on the bald one with a dirty diaper). And secondly, Kajus Aukščionis recently won a Lithuanian baby race and is a super fast crawler. Not as fast as me, but I have a special skill set. But what gets young Kajus crawling so fast? Laptops. The little haxor loves those things and bolts to them whenever he sees one. It's true, I heard one time he shat through his diaper in Best Buy he was so excited.

Lithuanian Baby Racing Champion Mired In Performance-Enhancing Laptop Scandal [gizmodo]

Thanks to ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff, who may or may not have fallen asleep at the keyboard.

Apr 27 2009 They Were Everywhere!: ESPN Gets Hacked, Konami Coded, Unicorned And Rainbowed

Somebody hacked the ESPN.com site to accept the Konami code (↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A) and then to start adding unicorns and rainbows to the page every time you hit ENTER. I can attest to it working because two tipsters hit me up with the goods before ESPN caught on. Suffice it to say, I unicorned the hell out of that shit and then cooked pork chops on the grill. Unfortunately, when I came back to write this it had already been fixed. So if you're the one that did it, do it again (but not to Geekologie) so everyone can play with it. Then, I want you all to write your congressman about the unicorn olympics and sick that would be.

Hit the jump for another screenshot of the site from a reader who also wanted to display his bacon loving pride.

Continue Reading " They Were Everywhere!: ESPN Gets Hacked, Konami Coded, Unicorned And Rainbowed "

Sep 15 2008 Uh-Oh: Large Hadron Collider Hacked, Countdown To Destruction Initiated !!

Last week a group of hackers busted all up in the Large Hadron Collider's network and did stuff. Okay, so they didn't really do anything. That we know about.

Calling themselves the Greek Security Team, the interlopers mocked the IT used on the project, describing the technicians responsible for security as "a bunch of schoolkids."

However, despite an ominous warning "don't mess with us," the hackers said they had no intention of disrupting the work of the atom smasher.

"We're pulling your pants down because we don't want to see you running around naked looking to hide yourselves when the panic comes," they wrote in Greek in a rambling note posted on the LHC's network.

Of course they're not going to disrupt the atom smashing. They have to make sure the LHC is fully functional before they bust back in. Then they'll use the system's time machining capabilities to travel back in time and fulfill man's quest to have sex with dinosaurs. Lizard people yo, lizard people.

Hit the jump for a video explaining the experiments conducted using the LHC.

Continue Reading " Uh-Oh: Large Hadron Collider Hacked, Countdown To Destruction Initiated !! "

Feb 13 2008 l337 Eye Chart Isn't Haxor Approved

This the l337 Eye Chart. It has some really basic acronyms people use online, but in the form of an eye chart! It says at the bottom if you can read it then you have l337 eyes. And I could, so my eyez must b teh l337! Unfortunately having l337 eyes doesn't come with wall hack capabilities, which is a shame because I think the couple that live next door are totally doing it.

l337 Eye Chart [neatorama]