Nov 4 2009 The Airshake: Because Nobody Wants H1-N1
First of all, I thought we all agreed to call it H1N1 or the swine flu and NOT the Mexican Flu. Geez, no need to point fingers. Obvious racism aside, Belgian telecommunications company Telenet has suggested a way to shake hands in which we can still greet each other, but without actually making human contact: the airshake.
"...we desperately need a new way of greeting each other, since greeting is the cornerstone of our social and political life. It's a sign of mutual respect, friendship and equality. As of today we propose to replace the firm handshake by an airshake, that's a handshake without touching one another. So concerned are they, they even created a short video demonstration with Jarabe Tapatio--aka the Mexican Hat Dance--as the soundtrack.
That's right, they used the Mexican Hat Dance. Are all Belgians this racist? Because I will boycott their waffles. It won't be easy but I'll do it.
Hit the jump for a short video demonstration on airshaking.
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Apr 20 2009 Matthew Perry Seeks Medical Attention After Injuring Hands Playing Video Games
Matthew Perry, with nothing to do since Friends went off the air like twenty years ago, has taken to playing video games. Like an addict. Seen here about to take his first hit with Snoop Dogg, Matthew has a serious gaming problem. So serious he had to seek medical attention after damaging his hands.
The actor admits he spends days on end glued to the screen playing war games on his XBox, ruining the muscles and tendons in his hand.
Perry says, "I play a lot of video games a lot of XBox 360. I played Fall Out 3 so often I had to go to a hand doctor. I used my hand too much and had to get injections in it."
Nice try, Mr. Perry, but I suspect the real culprit here is a little thing I like to call chronic masturbation. Been watching a few too many Friends reruns, have we?
Perry's videogame-mangled hand [yahoonews]
Thanks to Edd, who particularly likes the episodes where you can see Rachel's nipples through her shirt (read: all of them).
Feb 2 2009 Geekologie Reader Makes Zombie Cake
Geekologie reader Kristen went and made her boyfriend a zombie cake. That was nice of you, Kristen.
The hand was crafted out of newspaper, paper mache and tape. The cake is all chocolate with Oreo crumbles to resemble dirt. My boyfriend's name is Jonathan and he's studying Animation. He keeps the hand at the studio on his desk.
I call the ring finger! Mmmm, papery. Fiber, bitches, what?
Hit the jump for several more pictures, including one of the zombie trying to put the move on Jonathan.
Jan 29 2009 No, Nuh-Uh, No Way: The Robo-Urinal
Allegedly this robo-urinal holds your junk while you pee. For once in my life I'm really praying it's a Photoshop job or some really sick art project. You know the rule about having at least a urinal of separation between you and another dude in the bathroom? Well there are not enough urinals in the world to safely separate you from this thing. I wouldn't even feel safe pissing in the women's room sink.
Oh Hell No [tinypic]
Thanks to NinjaMuffin, who can melt enemies like butter on his top.
Jan 20 2009 Guy Gets Arm Replaced Luke Skywalker Style
Evan Reynolds, 19, got his hand and part of his arm ripped off in a car accident and has since been fitted with an i-LIMB, a robotic hand developed by an Apple/Star Wars fanboy.
The i-Limb was developed by a Scottish company, Touch Bionics, and has won awards for its innovative technology. The total cost including the hand itself and the fitting is about £30,000.
"It's so sensitive I can grip a bottle of water or a paper cup without crushing it, and even swing a racket. All I have to so is imagine picking something up or gripping it and the fingers and thumb move automatically."Mr Reynolds said his disability has not stopped him playing sport, his greatest passion, nor has it crushed his spirit.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for fake arms and shit, but I'd still be pissed if Evan could throw the ball better than me. And that, dear reader, is only one of the thousands of reasons why I'm going to spend eternity in hell with a piece of glowing charcoal in my ass.
Bionic hand gives student new lease of life [telegraph]
Thanks to MoMan, who fears the day his robotic prosthetic turns on him and rips his penis off.
