Oct 15 2009 *Sniff* A Street Fighter 4 Love Song

This is a Street Fighter love song. It made me sad, especially after reading about missing balloon boy (who better just be hiding under a neighbor's porch). Anyway, it may not be as good as the Mario Kart love song, but it still got to me. And by got to me I mean I wept like a baby chopped down a sequoia with my bare hands and had sex with ten alligators. Excuse me, crocodiles. And there were twelve.

Hadouken: The Street Fighter 4 Love Song [techeblog]

Thanks to naas, who knows how to throw hadoukens in different colors because he practices black magic.

Aug 13 2009 RIP: Les Paul Has Left The Recording Studio

Les Paul, famed musician and inventor, has passed away.

Les Paul, who invented the solid-body electric guitar later wielded by a legion of rock 'n' roll greats, died Thursday of complications from pneumonia. He was 94.

With Mary Ford, his wife from 1949 to 1962, he earned 36 gold records for hits including "Vaya Con Dios" and "How High the Moon," which both hit No. 1. Many of their songs used overdubbing techniques that Paul had helped develop.

As an inventor, Paul also helped bring about the rise of rock 'n' roll with multitrack recording, which enables artists to record different instruments at different times, sing harmony with themselves, and then carefully balance the tracks in the finished recording.

Wow, talk about changing the face of music. Good lookin', Les. Here's to joining that great jam session in the sky.

R.I.P.

Guitar legend-inventor Les Paul dies at age 94 [yahoonews]

Jun 15 2009 Finally, I Can Sleep At Night: New 'People Simultaneously Air Guitaring' Record Set

Music fans at the recent UK Download Festival gathered around an EA booth to celebrate the future release of Brutal Legend and set a new 'people simultaneously playing the same song on air guitar' Guinness World Record. In this case, there were 440 people (beating last year's 318) playing Motörhead's "Ace of Spades".

'That was one of the raddest jams I've ever been involved with. The crowd played their air guitars better than Eddie Van Halen! Then they destroyed 'em good and proper. Who cares, right? They can go to the air guitar shop and get another one. Sick to the infinity of sickness! I want a crowd like that at every gig I'm at. Awesometacular - air guitar world records rule!'

Wow, that might very well be the least raddest quote I've ever been involved with. Besides that one about me experimenting with a robot. WHICH IS A LIE. The video too.

Brutal Legend Fans Set Air Guitar World Record [kotaku]

Thanks to Julian, who has officially set the record for number of Geekologie tips used.

Jan 14 2009 Highly Questionable Guitar: The Wangcaster

Want to jam out on the guitar and look like you're stroking a giant member at the same time? Yeah, me neither. Unless you said yes first, in which case, DO I!

Wangcaster
via
Time to dumb down the guitar [splicetoday]

Thanks to Andrew, who had a Gibson Flying Vagina but set it on fire at a concert.

Dec 22 2008 Wow: Man Breaks Knee Playing Guitar Hero

Some guy broke his knee playing Guitar Hero. Well, it wasn't actually the game that did it, he was trying to do a Rockette high-kick or some shit for extra style points. He failed.

I was face to face with my Arch Nemesis/Very Good Friend/Roommate Craig. It was time to see who could out rock each other while playing Texas Flood.

We were neck in neck in points... I had to do something special. I needed STYLE points. I breathed deep, my rock meter was maxed out and I was going to make this audience feel it. I twisted to the right and threw my guitar in the air! Instead of a roaring audience I heard a loud snap! My knee slid to the outside of my leg and my leg bent sideways as I fell to the ground.

Half the people in the room were concerned the other half called me a pussy. One guy, the Geekologie Writer, spilled a drink my couch and then puked everywhere. It was projectile. He left without cleaning it up.

Ha, and don't you ever forget it. I don't just puke, I PEW PEWK.

GuitarHeroBrokeMyKnee.com (complete with grody picture section)

Thanks to Jennaiii, who once broke my heart during a game of Rock Band.

Oct 10 2008 Sure, Why Not?: A Giant Guitar Boat

Like the saying goes, "when the going gets tough, the tough build a giant freaking guitar boat and cruise around in that mother like PUT PUT PUT". Am I right? I'm wrong. Anyway, this is Indie rocker Josh Pyke taking a fully functional guitar boat for a spin in the music video for his song "Make You Happy". I tried to find the video and couldn't, but apparently the dude's got some musical skills. But no boating ones. He crashed into a dock and spilled a ton of notes. You know, notes -- like musical notes. Because it's a guitar. Fine, somebody come AIDS me in the face, I deserve it.

Giant guitar is a seaworthy motorboat [dvice]

Sep 17 2008 Mini Kegs: Not Just For Breakfast Anymore

Etsy seller hesslerk is selling this sleek Heineken mini keg amp for $120.

My liver suffered to bring you this awesome amp, don't worry... the beer went to a good cause!

The sleek design and sound quality will blow you away! Works great for Guitar, Bass, and MP3 players. Plugs into a standard wall outlet. The amp has a power switch and volume control.

I want it. I can't even play the guitar and my MP3 player got stolen by a monkey while vacationing in Costa Rica, but I still want it. I mean, I love beer. Which explains why I woke up in jail and had to make up a lame excuse for why I showed up for work so late.

Hit the jump for one more picture.

Continue Reading " Mini Kegs: Not Just For Breakfast Anymore "

Aug 21 2008 Guitar Hero For DS Modded With A Guitar

We've seen mods for Guitar Hero in the past, but this is the first I've spotted for the DS version. Eric Ruckman, unhappy with the gameplay of Guitar Hero: On Tour decided that, instead of cutting his loses, he'd mod a PS2 Guitar Hero controller to play the game.

As you can see above, that includes a special housing for the DS itself (it's still used for strumming), and even a built-in FM transmitter with its own screen, which lets him pump the audio through his home sound system.

Sweet modding skills Eric, but as the old saying goes, "just because you can, you probably shouldn't have."

Hit the jump to see a video demonstration of the mod in action.

Continue Reading " Guitar Hero For DS Modded With A Guitar "

Aug 5 2008 Just Because: A Tesla Coil Guitar Amp

Well we've seen Tesla coils making music before, and we've even seen a pretty wicked plasma speaker, and now -- a Tesla coil guitar amp. Unfortunately, I don't have any more information on the thing, so I'll make some up. The device was actually constructed by the thunder god Thor out of a welded hemorrhoid donut he discarded after his ass was all better. They'll be available as mods for the latest Guitar Hero and Rock Band games, and exposure to the arc has been proven to regrow hair, but only if you lick it with a mouthful of Pop Rocks.

Tesla Coil Guitar Amp: Ride the lightning [dvice]

Jul 9 2008 Steampunk Guitar Looks Good, Pointy

This is a steampunk guitar. It's functional. You may love it. Or you may hate it because you hate everything steampunk. Or you may hate it because your girlfriend cheated on you with a musician. Whatever the case, you either love it or hate it. Or just think it's okay. One of those three. Or, okay, maybe you're indifferent. But definitely one of four. Unless you love it sometimes, hate it others, and don't care the rest. Or if you, I dunno, wow I'm high. Cookie Crisp in chocolate milk for the win.

Hit the jump for another steampunkish guitar. And by "steampunkish" I mean it has a custom pick guard that looks like gears.

Continue Reading " Steampunk Guitar Looks Good, Pointy "

Jul 2 2008 Kid Breaks Guitar Hero Record, Is 13

Danny Johnson is 13-years old that started playing Guitar Hero a scant 9 months ago. But that hasn't stopped him from putting my skills to shame and snagging the Guinness World Record for highest score on "Through The Fire and Flames". Danny scored 890,971 points in front of a live audience at the Guitar Hero 24 Hour Maraton in Dallas and has allegedly pushed past 950,000 points at home. Danny estimates he's played the song nearly 500 times since first starting the game.

Danny still plays "Guitar Hero" about three hours a day. And even though he holds the world record, he's trying to do even better on "Through the Fire and Flames," trying to beat his high score. That poses plenty of challenge for him -- if not some irritation.

"I do hate the song," he admits with some reluctance. "It gets annoying a lot."

Three hours a day, huh? I see your three hours Danny, and raise you two more. The record will be mine. Oh yes, the record will be mine. Okay, now's the part where I say something mean about a 13-year old to make myself feel better because I'm jealous that he's better than me. Look away if you still want to have any respect for The Geekologie Writer. You've been warned. Hey Danny, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say the grand prize for the tournament wasn't a girlfriend, was it? Haha, BURN! Wait a minute, I don't have one either. Who's the asshole now, Danny? Yeah, still me.

Hit the jump for a video of the record-breaking performance (filmed on a freaking television), along with one that was made in the comfort of his own home in which he scores over 949,000.

Continue Reading " Kid Breaks Guitar Hero Record, Is 13 "

Jun 30 2008 Guitar Hero Figures From McFarlane Toys

Thats right folks, McFarlane Toys has partnered with Activision to make a line of Guitar Hero themed action figures. They'll be hitting stores in November (in time for Christmas/robot apocalypse) and will each feature 15-18 moving parts, stand abound 6" tall, and run $10-$15. The figures available will include Johnny Napalm, Lars Ümlaut, the Geekologie Writer, Axel Steel, the God of Rock, and the Devil of Country. Seriously though, I should have a damn action figure. With accessories. Like a blue-screening computer and broken cellphone. Nagging girlfriend and cubicle playset sold separately.

Hit the jump for a look at two of the other figures.

Continue Reading " Guitar Hero Figures From McFarlane Toys "

Jun 24 2008 Video: How To Play Guitar Hero On The DS

This is a video explaining how to play Guitar Hero: On Tour with the Nintendo DS. It ranks right up there with the Star Wars Dance Competition in things that are unbearable to watch. Seriously, I almost killed myself while watching it. I was just slipping my head through the noose when it ended. Don't believe me? I dare you to watch the whole 3:30 and then tell me with a straight face you didn't entertain cutting yourself. Because you did. You also entertained finding out where Mr. Eyeliner lives and cutting him. Go on, admit it.

Guitar Hero: On Tour promo video makes grown men cry [engadget]

Thanks for the warning Julian, but curiosity got the best of me

Jun 19 2008 Robotic Band Actually Plays Pretty Well

While not as cute as the lovable little robot drummer, The Trons actually play with four part harmony...and feeling. The best thing about robotic bands is there's no chance of them turning into a bunch of strung out heroin addicts and nodding off on stage. Now I'm not saying I'd pay five dollars at the door, but I would sneak in the back and drink the band's beer while putting the moves on their robotic groupies. You ever touched a metal tit before? They're freakin' legit.

The Trons: self-playing robot band totally kills our self-esteem [engadget]

Thanks Ryan, I call dibs on the one with the bald head and that's leaking oil, you can have the rest.

May 28 2008 Help Guy Beat Guitar Hero 3, Earn Money

Well it's no Princess Zelda or vagina couch, but some guy named Jon that lives in the St. Louis Park area recently posted on his area's Craigslist looking for some help beating Guitar Hero 3.

I need help beating Raining Blood on Hard, and the last 2 sets on Expert starting with 3's and 7's.

If you could come over either Thursday night or Saturday afternoon I'd pay you to beat them for me. I'll give you an extra 5$ to beat Fire and Flames on Expert.

Let me know. I'm going to throw guitar through tv shortly if I don't get these beat. Thanks, Jon

So that's a whole $25 you could earn just by helping poor Jon beat some songs. Anybody in the area that can take him up on his offer? If so I want a kickback. And to find out if this is really a personal ad in disguise.

I need help with Guitar Hero 3 - $20 (St Louis Park) [craigslist]

Thanks to Kyle, who has no need for personal ads because his advertises itself

May 12 2008 Guitar Hero Mod For One Handed Players

That handsome devil in the picture there is Ben Heckendorn, a man best known for his portable consoles and a number of one handed controller mods. Well he's back with another, this time a controller that allows someone to play Guitar Hero with a single hand (and foot). It's basically a pedal that replaces the strum bar. You just wonk on it with your foot when you need to strum, and press the buttons on the guitar like you normally would. Great job, Ben. I love the fact that there are people out there like yourself that take the less-fortunate gamer into consideration when you're modding. Now if you could just make a robotic arm that chucks a Wii Wheel at the television whenever someone loses at Mario Kart, I think we'll be set. Not that I have a use for one -- I don't lose. No, I think The Superficial Writer needs one. You see, while not handicapped in the traditional sense, he's no good at the game and throws a hissy fit whenever you red shell him. Plus he's just an all around poor sport*.

*I'm going to the free clinic this afternoon, you better have been joking.

One more picture of the device after the jump.

Continue Reading " Guitar Hero Mod For One Handed Players "

Mar 20 2008 Guitar Hero For DS Looks, Um, Something

So this is how Guitar Hero: On Tour will be played on the Nintendo DS. By strumming your stylus on the touchscreen and mashing buttons on a fretboard attachment. You know, I really think that this version of the game is getting dangerously close to playing real guitar. The game is supposed to ship sometime this summer and it better have an option to flip the screen or something so you can play left-handed. Because otherwise it proves my sneaking suspicion that Activision is run by a bunch of righty fascists.

UPDATE: Questionable commercial added after the jump.

Continue Reading " Guitar Hero For DS Looks, Um, Something "

Mar 18 2008 Rock Band Mod Uses Real Guitar String

Rock Band just not real enough for you? Would playing a string instead of a strum-bar help? If so then this is the mod for you. All you have to do is dremel and drill the hell out of your guitar and install it. The patent pending kit is available on eBay with a starting bid of $75 plus an ultra-freaking-ridiculous shipping price of $24. You know, that's what I hate about eBay sellers -- their unbelievable shipping charges. I mean, this kit is two pieces of wood, some springs, screws and wire. What the French toast? It's like the time I bought a book and didn't realize the seller was asking $40 shipping. You know what I told that jerk? I told him I didn't want it anymore and if he even thought about leaving me negative feedback I'd find out where he lives and kill his whole family. I take my 100% positive feedback seriously.

Another picture of the unassembled kit and a video of it in action after the jump.

Continue Reading " Rock Band Mod Uses Real Guitar String "

Mar 6 2008 One String Willie Plays Guitar With One String

One String Willie is a recovering smack addict who used to turn tricks in a parked van to pay for his next fix. Not really, he's just some guy that likes playing a guitar with one string. I think his song is pretty impressive. You may not. But think about this -- if he's that good with just one string, imagine what he could do with, uh, half of one string. Not as much as a whole one? Really? Damn I hate fractions.

One String Willie [core77]

Mar 5 2008 9-Year Old Tears Up Guitar Hero III On Expert, Puts My Untalented Children To Shame

This is a video of 9-year old Ben tearing up Through the Fire and Flames for Guitar Hero III on expert. His little fingers move so fast. Just imagine how well he'd work on my child-labor powered assembly line. I bet he could really ramp up my production numbers. Don't get a big head though Ben, just because you can rock some Guitar Hero doesn't mean you're better than my kids. No sir. They're talented in other ways. Take my youngest son, Jimmy Jimereeno for instance. He sucks at video games but he can pick his nose. Yeah, and eat it. He's up there with the best of them. And not only that, he's not limited to his own nostrils. Just the other day I saw him jamming his chubby little finger up the dog's nose. Great kid, lots of talent.

Youtube

Thanks to Tim, who can play Guitar Hero blindfolded and with one arm tied behind his back, for the tip