Nov 19 2009 I Smell Beer Pong!: Pick Your Nose Cups Prevent Spread Of Drinkborne Illnesses

These Pick Your Nose party cups from Fred are a set of 24 cups (2 each of 12 designs) with different noses printed on them. That way you can easily identify your beverage and not end up drinking from somebody's dipping spit-cup. WHICH HAPPENS. Plus, you you get to spice up your look a bit. Although I'm a little disappointed they didn't get a little more creative with the designs. What about a witch doctor's nose with a bone through it? Don't even tell me that's not a brilliant idea. Because I will shrink your head faster than you can say, "OOO EEE, OOO AH AH TING TANG WALLA WALLA BING BANG!" Now, go look in the mirror. Haha, of course I didn't actually do it -- I DON'T EFF WITH BLACK MAGIC. Now The Gathering, that's a whole different story none of your business.

Hit the jump for a woman drinking out of a man's nose model. A woman with a man's nose -- ha!

Continue Reading " I Smell Beer Pong!: Pick Your Nose Cups Prevent Spread Of Drinkborne Illnesses "

Nov 13 2009 NASA: 'Significant' Water Found On The Moon. Yeah, But What About Dragons?!

Remember how NASA tried to blow up the moon to get at its molten cheese core? Well apparently they discovered a 'significant' amount of water in the process. Adult swim!

The discovery was announced by project scientist Anthony Colaprete at a midday news conference. "Indeed, yes, we found water," he said.

The find is based on preliminary data collected when the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing Satellite, or LCROSS, intentionally crashed October 9 into the permanently shadowed region of Cabeus crater near the moon's south pole.

After the satellite struck, a rocket flew through the debris cloud, measuring the amount of water and providing a host of other data, Colaprete said.

"The discovery opens a new chapter in our understanding of the moon," the space agency said in a written statement shortly after the briefing began.

Hell yes a new chapter in understanding the moon!

CHAPTER 6: Water On The Moon

There is water on the moon. Specifically, frozen water.

THE END

NASA finds 'significant' water on moon [cnn]
and
Picture [juliefainart]

Thanks to AZ-TRO-NOT, joey, STephen and Lizze, who found Kool-Aid on the moon but you probably never heard about it because of the massive conspiracy.

Nov 10 2009 Genius: Christmas Tree Ornament Flask

Because I'm just as bad as Verizon, here's a Christmas ornament flask. It's pretty genius and I'm committing to covering my tree with nothing but them. No twinkly lights, no angel topper, just a shit-ton of booze. High-five, Santa! You fat bastard.

Cleverly disguised like an ornament, this coated stainless steel flask is here to make the holidays a little brighter (or maybe foggier). Finished with a ribbon-topped twist top and flat bottom (you might need to put it down).

Each flask will set you back $24 from Urban Outfitters, which is kind of steep. So yeah, maybe I won't be decking my halls with them after all. But don't think I still won't hang a bourbon-filled Gatorade bottle from the tree, because I 100% will. And, if I play my cards right, make out with a camel in the nativity. Humpy -- I've seen the way you've been eying me!

Product Site
via
Ornament Flask Makes The Season Fuzzy [nerdapproved]

Thanks to Closet Nerd, who better have a little shrine to Geekologie in that closet. Come on, I'll give you lock of my hair!

Nov 4 2009 How To: Open A Wine Bottle Sans Corkscrew

Ever needed to open a bottle of wine but didn't have a corkscrew? Apparently all you need a shoe and something rock hard. LIKE MY ASS ABS ASS. Alternatively, break the top off and chug the whole bottle. I mean, unless you're cool being a sissy boy. Trust me, manliest way to drink wine. AND THERE AREN'T MANY.

MacGyvered Inebriation: Guy Opens Wine Bottle With Shoe [uberreview]

Sep 25 2009 Whee!: Beer Blaster Shoots Beer, Soda

The Beer Blaster is a $23 beer/soda pistol available from ThinkGeek that punctures a shaken can and uses the carbonation to blast your enemies with sticky sodie (or a friend's open's mouth with delicious beer) from up to 10 feet. Also, who would have thought that Harry Potter would turn from a life of magic to a life of contributing to the delinquency of minors on the playground? Didn't see that one coming! Or did I? I totally did.

ThinkGeek Product Site
via
Beer Blaster [likecool]

Thanks to Ste, who once shot himself in the face with a keg and was the life of the party. But did you wear a lampshade and piss in the stove?

Sep 21 2009 The World's Most Expensive Booze (Bottle)

The world's most expensive booze is (and I did absolutely no fact checking about this) is a bottle of Chambord valued at $3.24 million. That's too much.

Donald Edge has created with French company Chambord a £2 million bottle of their liqueur to celebrate the new stage version of Breakfast at Tiffany's.

The iconic Chambord Royal orb bottle, hand-wrought from 18 carat yellow gold, will be encrusted with the finest round pearls, over 1,100 exquisitely cut round and pear shaped diamonds, and a square cut emerald diamond.

So, how much if I just want the booze (I've got plenty of empty two-liters!)? Cause, at least according to the Virginia ABC website, they're selling 750ml bottles for $35.50. That means I can get 91,267 bottles for the exact same price! And you know what? That's exactly what I'm gonna do. Glug till I die, bitches!

Chambord Bottle Worth $2 Million [luxuo]

Thanks to Fran, who drinks unicorn blood out of a jewel-encrusted goblet because he doesn't know they're an endangered species.

Sep 20 2009 Dungeons & Dragons Spellcasting Sodies

Jones Soda, in an attempt to appeal to the pale basement dweller demographic, is releasing a limited edition of Dungeon & Dragons themed sodies ($11 six-packs, $19 12-bangers). And with flavors like Potion of Healing, Sneak Attack, Bigby's Crushing Thirst Destroyer, Dwarven Draught, Illithid Brain Juice and Eldritch Blast, they're sure to quench even the most satanic of thirsts. DEVIL WORSHIPERS! I jest. No I don't. I know you spraypainted that pentagram on the gymnasium! Now, gimme your lunch money before I tell everyone about your level 1 pants dwarf.

Product Site
via
jones-ing for some dungeons & dragons soda [technabob]

Sep 17 2009 Genius!: Neck Tie Beer Bottle Opener

The After Office Tie, by Argentinian design firm Sinapsis, appears to be an ordinary neck tie when worn under a suit. But little will your boss know that there's actually a bottle opener at the bottom perfect for opening happiness (read: booze) while on the clock! You know, this reminds me: one day I almost finished a whole case of beer at work. *glug glug glug* Aaaaaaaand I did it! Now, who's down for happy hour? I will drink your ass under the table! Oooh, and while you're down there -- you spy any loose Chex mix? I like the cereal bits.

Concept: Tie with built-in bottle opener [crunchgear]

Thanks to Jason, who opens beer bottles with his eye socket like a normal pirate.

Aug 26 2009 Genius: Booze Light Helps Prevents Spillage

The ElectraPour LED bottle top was designed to light up the stream of fire-water pouring from a bottle so that when you're home alone drinking in the dark you don't miss your glass (read: man up and drink from the bottle like a normal damn person). Each top will set you back $7.30 or you can pick up one short of a baker's dozen for $81. Alternatively, only drink liquor over 150 proof and always light it on fire. But if you do, remember these important words: stop, drop and pop & lock. Now you're breakdancing on fire!

Hit the jump for a video of the light in action.

Continue Reading " Genius: Booze Light Helps Prevents Spillage "