Aug 1 2009 Geekologie Reader Makes Plasticine iPhone

Geekologie loyalist Mark went and made an iPhone out of Placticine modeling clay. Now I know what you're thinking, and I agree -- JUST LIKE THE REAL THING! Granted, people have already made iPhones out of all sorts of stuff, but, quite frankly, those people don't read Geekologie. Or if they do they don't write telling me how much they like me and how awesome I am. FLATTERY PAYS, FOLKS. And, amazingly, blogging.

What you see is the result of a bored day at work plus a box of plasticine. The colours are a bit messed up as we only had yellow, red, orange, green and blue.... the rest we had to mix up.

(sorry I didn't add a dinosaur app to it)

So here's what you do: you ask to borrow somebody's real iPhone, and then, once you have it in hand, you slyly turn away and then replace it with this one. Then make ringing sounds until they try to pick up! HAHAHAHAHA -- good times.

Thanks Mark, now make me a dinosaur. Go on, you promised.

Jul 31 2009 Wear This *snicker*: Bikini Dissolves In Water

Wow, just typing snicker makes me want a Snickers bar. Does it do that to you too? Please circle yes or no and pass this note back to me in between classes. So anyway, a seemingly ordinary bikini that dissolves when it gets wet. That's something.

Sellers in Germany bill the dissolving Get Naked costume as a chance for men to get their own back after a break-up.

But women's rights campaigner Rosmarie Zapfl stormed: "It is an absolute insult to women that this has been invented."

It really is though. Which is exactly why I just bought every last one of them so no woman will have to experience that humiliation. Also, ladies -- pool party at my house! No need to bring anything, I've got a ton of suits *snicker*. Damnit I did it again.

Dissolving Bikini is the Ultimate Revenge Gift [spike]
and
Teeny weeny dissolvable bikini [thesun]

Thanks to Steven, william and slammer, who only wear thong-backed bathing suits because they're cheeky.

Jun 4 2009 Boom Drink: How To Make Exploding Cocktails

You just freeze a mint flavored Mento in an ice cube and then make a drink for a friend (read: enemy). Any artificially sweetened soda should work, but preferably something darker so the frozen Mento isn't so obvious. Then, a few minutes later when the Mento is exposed to the soda, BOOOSH! Alternatively, garnish your friend's glass with a live hand grenade.

Mix an Exploding Drink [wired]

Thanks to Towhee Monster, who once bit a Snap-N-Pop to make it explode because she's hardcore.

Dec 26 2008 High School Students Use Photoshop, Traffic Cameras To Prank Enemies, Puzzle Police

High school students in Montgomery County, Maryland (where, incidentally, I used to live -- go Q.O.!) are Photoshopping pictures of their enemy's license plates, taping them to another car, and then speeding through areas with those automatic ticketing cameras. Interesting....

The Speed Camera Program was implemented in March of this year and used for the purpose of reducing traffic and pedestrian collisions in the county. Cameras are located in residential areas and school zones where the posted speed limit is 35 miles per hour or lower. A $40 citation is mailed to the owner of the car for violating the speed limit in these areas.

The ingenuity of today's teenagers is truly awe inspiring. They would even go as far as to borrow car's so they would appear similar to the make and model of the car they were pranking.

Well damn. I catch any of you jerks out there rocking paper GKLGIST plates and I'll rear-end that ass with the force of a dump truck. You know, because that's what I drive. HONK HONK!

Kids Prank using Speed Cameras [lastgeek]

Thanks to Bryce, who doesn't drive a car because he's too busy driving women wild. HIYO!

Dec 9 2008 Sure, Why Not?: A Keyboard For Blondes

The Keyboard For Blondes is a real $50 product. What makes it for blondes? Well, it has some questionably clever keys in place of the standard ones, comes complete with audio, and a lovely pink coloration.

The all-pink keyboard swaps out standard keys with funnier, dumber key names. The backspace key now says "Oops!" and the entire row of function keys spells out USELESS KEYS. Hit the "$" sign and you get the sound of a cash register clinking.

Blondes can even get a little technical and use special keys that type out "OMG," "ALI" (Absolutely Love It!) or "XOXO." My favorite? The caps lock key now says: "Warning! size XXL letters."

ZOMG, too funny! Go here to see a high-res picture of the peripheral, then stab yourself for even thinking about buying it for somebody. Then buy it for somebody. Then stab yourself again for pissing away $50. Then return it. Then bandage yourself up for doing the right thing. Alternatively, I'll wear a blonde wig while we're having sex and you can call me dumb. Haha, no sneaking in the ass!

Product Page
via
OMG! It's a Keyboard for Blondes [msn]

Thanks to Romeo, Crystal and Jeff, who don't need keyboards because they can all type with their minds. Or voice recognition software, whatever.

Sep 3 2008 Say No To Carpal Tunnel: Bloody Stump Wrist Rests Perfect For Halloween, Zombie Decoys

Worried about developing carpal tunnel? Get a job where you don't have to type. But for the rest of us, there are wrist rests. This $15 set includes one hand and foot and is sure to get a rise out of undead coworkers. Of course, if you actually do work with zombies you should probably chop their heads off before they eat your brain. As a matter of fact, The Superficial Writer and I had to take a fire axe to the secretary just this afternoon when we caught her eating an arm.

UPDATE: Haha, it was a meatball sub. I swear, that marinara can be deceiving. Well, long story short, we called the coppers and blamed it on The Iwatchstuff Writer.

Hit the jump for a few more pictures of the gore.

Continue Reading " Say No To Carpal Tunnel: Bloody Stump Wrist Rests Perfect For Halloween, Zombie Decoys "

Aug 27 2008 Hacked! USB Drive Will Befuddle Onlookers!

The Hacked! USB Drive is actually a 2GB flash drive that just looks like a frayed USB cable. ZOMG, people will look at that and be so confused! The only thing that could make it better is if, instead of a frayed USB cable, it was a real severed arm complete with tattoos and 4GB of storage. Imagine the looks you'd get with that hanging out the side of your laptop! Looks like "OMG, I'm calling the police!" and "bitchin' ink." Or, from the zombies, "I want a byte."

Hacked! USB Drive Guarantees Worried Stares From Passerbys [ohgizmo]

Thanks Beezy, you haven't seen my hacksaw lying around, have you?

Jun 17 2008 Gag Pens Help Prevent Unwanted Theft

Tired of co-workers *ahem, Superficial Writer, Iwatchstuff Writer* borrowing your analog writing instruments, only to never see them again? Well the Borrow My Pen? set ($7) aims to alleviate the problem of pen theft. Each features a fictional place of business along with a catchy phrase designed to prevent people from wanting to keep them. Stuff like Van Nuys Center For Cosmetic Surgery, "Specializing in Difficult Gender Reassignments". Clever, but not clever enough. I've got the feeling I'd still get pens stolen with these. That's why I had Sharpie make a set with my own clever phrases. Stuff like: The Geekologie Writer, "If You Can Read This You've Stolen My Pen And I'm About To F***ing Stab You With It" and Center For Infectious Disease, "Free Pen For New STD's".

A Pen That Will Always Be Returned [ohgizmo]

Jun 4 2008 Handwrench Is A Real Hand Wrench, But Not A Real Hand, Or A Real Practical Wrench

This is the Handwrench by designer Paul Julius Martus. It's a hand wrench, with a little hand on the end. BWAHAH HA HA HA! Some people, so clever. I'm pretty sure it's just an art piece though, seeing how your little fingers would probably break off if you were trying to bust a real serious nut loose. Still, Paul gets clever points for being clever with the little hand. But I get 2x clever points for that bust a nut thing I said.

Handwrench [notcot]

Thanks Shawn, you wanna come over and help me build a deck?

Mar 20 2008 How To Mod A Disposable Camera To Shock The User, Or How To Be A Real Jerk

This is how to modify a disposable camera to redirect the voltage that would normally be used to charge the capacitor to shock the unsuspecting user instead. I actually saw some kids do this in middle school a long time ago, but all they did was take the camera apart and take the two wires and twist them so that they were crossed but not touching. Then they'd slap you on the arm with it and they'd connect and shock. It was ghetto, and I'm pretty sure those kids have long since gotten their first taste of prison food. Anyways, this version is a lot classier than that one. There's some footage of people using it after the tutorial, and it looks like it works pretty good. I'm just glad they didn't try it on me, because they'd be in store for a little shock prank of their own. And that shock would come in the form of a live 240V wire being jammed up their ass. I swear, I'm such a prankster.

The Stunning Camera [pyroelectric]

Thanks to Chris, who is stunning himself and who I would not actually do that to, for the tip

Feb 26 2008 People Take Full-Sized Desktops Into Starbucks To Use Free Wi-Fi Service

Improv Everywhere, an improv troupe that is always up to some sort of ridiculous shenanigans, is at it again. This time a group of them bring full-sized desktop computers (complete with CRTs) into Starbucks to take advantage of the free Wi-Fi. Oh the hilarity. You should see the looks on the faces of bystanders. They're all totally thinking WTF. What a great prank. Almost as awesome as the prank when I hid under my girlfriend's bed and was going to scare her when she went to sleep. It was hilarious! She came home with my boss and another one of my coworkers and took turns doing them while I cried silently and tried to avoid the bedsprings. Yeah, I got her good.

Video after the jump, along with another one of their improv skits in which a ton of them come to a dead stop in Grand Central Station for five minutes. That one is actually worth watching.

Continue Reading " People Take Full-Sized Desktops Into Starbucks To Use Free Wi-Fi Service "

Jan 24 2008 500XL Earbud Speakers May Hurt Your Ears

The 500XL Earbud Speakers were designed to be 500 times the size of normal iPod earbuds. I think they're just a conceptual product design by Fred & Friends, and thus don't exist in the real world yet (and may never). According to the company:

How great will these look on your desktop alongside your mp3 player or PC? 500XL includes a built-in amp and 3-way power - it runs on batteries; you can connect it to your PC’s USB port with the supplied cord; or plug it into the wall with a generic power supply (not included). The stand-up, peggable clamshell packaging really makes a statement.

Now as a person with unusually large ears, I appreciate where they're going with this product. Unfortunately I just took some measurements and I'm going to have to hold out for the 750XL's to ensure a snug fit.

500XL Speakers; iPod Earbuds 500 TImes The Size Of The Original [uberreview]

Nov 15 2007 Key Fob Shocks Unsuspecting Joyriders

The Shocks Car Key ($51), from Bim Bam Banana, is a key fob that looks like it will unlock your car. Except it won't, it will just shock you. How in the hell you're supposed to find someone dumb enough to push the big red button on the side that says "SHOCK" is a mystery to me. Seems like a serious design flaw. I guess you're supposed to scratch it out and write something clever on it like "PUSH ME". And hopefully the person will also ignore the metal electrodes. But if you do find someone to push the button, oh the laughs that will be had! Your friend gets shocked, then kicks out all your lights and breaks the car windows. They'll follow up that hilarity by rubbing your face on the pavement, taking your real keys and backing over you with your own car. What a funny prank!

Product Site [bimbambanana]

Thanks to Stevie, a man who knows how to have a good time, for the tip