Oct 15 2009 UPDATE: 6-Year Old (NOT) Floating Around In Homemade UFO Balloon
That's no 'Get Well' balloon, that's a 20' foil aircraft with a 6-year old boy inside, floating aimlessly 8,000 feet above eastern Colorado. Uh-oh.
The helium balloon was tethered to the boy's family home in Fort Collins, the Larimer County Sheriff's Department said. The boy got into the craft Thursday morning and undid the rope anchoring it.
Margie Martinez of the Weld County Sheriff's Office said a sibling saw the boy climb into the basket before the balloon took off. Since the door on the balloon was unlocked, Martinez said it's possible the boy had fallen out."The structure at the bottom of the balloon that the boy is in is made of extremely thin plywood and won't withstand any kind of a crash at all," said Erik Nilsson, Larimer County emergency manager, according to CNN affiliate KMGH.
Great, so he either fell out or won't survive the crash. Hooray for positive thinking. Come back down safely, balloon boy.
UPDATE: No boy when balloon landed. Not good.
UPDATE UPDATE: Falcon (the boy's actual name) was found hiding in a box in the garage attic (great search effort). This calls for celebration! (you hold him down, I'll tie on the fireworks)
6-year-old Colorado boy floats away in balloon [cnn]
Thanks to Jimmothy, stacy, jordana, dorothy, NICKSTER, rya, Jake, e.,The Superficial Writer, steven, Nigel, Valhalla, Lizzie, Noah and pepe la PEW PEW, whose parents thankfully never let them play around giant UFO balloons unsupervised.
Mar 30 2009 Pac-Man Zero Gravity: Not Really That Fun
Haha, but that didn't stop me from playing all the way to level 3! Well, if there is a level 3. They kind of all looked the same. Messy.
Once the gameplay kicks in, gravity switches off, and Inky, Blinky, Pinky, Clyde, the power pills and dots all get to floating around the darkness of space.
You won't be able to get through this game by memorizing patterns while playing this version. Your only hope is to gobble up a power pill, which turns on gravity for a few seconds, sucking every object in the direction of the red gravity arrow - but the ghosts never turn blue for you to chomp on.
You can download the game HERE if you really want. I found that a good technique is to push a piece of wall around in front so the ghosts can't get to you. But The Superficial Writer pointed out an even better technique: "stop playing that shit, you idiot".
if pac-man obeyed the laws of physics [technabob]
Feb 9 2009 Make Calls In Private With The Isophone
The Isophone may like a giant waterbug banging your brain, but it's actually a device designed to provide uninterrupted peace and quiet while you're making phone calls.
The Isophone is essentially a telecommunications device providing a service that can be described simply as a meeting of the telephone and the floatation tank. The user wears a helmet that blocks out all peripheral sensory distraction whilst keeping the head above the surface of the water... a space is created for providing a pure, distraction free environment for making a telephone call.
I need one. Like yesterday. Ooh, and a pool. This bathtub just isn't cutting it anymore. *knocking* Damnit -- SHUT UP MOM I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE! What's that? Fish sticks for dinner? Hot damn, I'll be out in a sec!
Hit the jump for several more shots of this chick using the device.
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Dec 29 2008 50-Foot Asimo To Lead Rose Bowl Parade
Honda is rocking out with their robot out January 1st at the Tournament of Roses on January 1st in Pasadena, California. That's right, a 50-foot likeness of Asimo, the harbinger of our destruction, will lead the parade along with a Honda FCX Clarity (fuel cell car). Be sure to tune in and watch the giant robotic bastard go rogue and start stomping dancers and bystanders. Which, I think we can all agree, will make for some awesome freaking television.
Hit the jump for two more pictures, including one of construction.
Dec 22 2008 Float-A-Pet Prevents Pet Drownings
The Float-A-Pet floating dog collar saves pet lives should God decide to spite us with another flood for all the debauchery. When the collar's sensors detect water -- PFFFFT -- the collar inflates, keeping most tiny-ass dogs and cats afloat by their neck. Also, I'd say it probably works on turtles. But seriously Noah, you could have saved yourself a ton of labor.
Floating dog collar will keep your pooch afloat in a flood [dvice]
Oct 30 2008 Oh My God, I'm Floating!: A Hover Chair
The Lounger is a $9,600 floating chair that will be on display at Britain's Stuff Live gadget show this weekend.
Inventor Keith Dixon, of Sussex-based Hoverit Ltd, said he was inspired as a child by the anti-gravity Landspeeder vehicles in the "Star Wars" films.
"The sensation you feel as you lie back and close your eyes is totally different -- like floating on a cloud," said a Stuff Live spokesman. Its 6,000 pound ($9,620) price tag may bring visitors back down to earth with a bump, however.
Floating on a cloud, huh? More like floating on a piece of hard molded plastic. Last time I felt like I was floating on a cloud I was getting my wisdom teeth pulled and high as Benjamin Franklin's kite on laughing gas. I jusht bit frew muh lip!
Rise above economic woes with the hover chair [reuters]
Thanks to Jack, who can hover without magnets. He's a magician!
Sep 15 2008 Watchmen's Dr. Manhattan In LEGO Form
You know that Watchmen movie that's coming out? The one based on Alan Moore's graphic (but not that kind of graphic) novel? Yeah, well somebody went and LEGOfied the character poster of Dr. Manhattan. Pretty impressive work. Hit the jump for a comparison shot, showing the incredibly similarity to both the poster AND original artwork. Good looking, Flickr user artpoly. If I've said it once I've said it at least ten times: there's only one thing sexier than a man's glowing blue ass -- a plastic one. So hot right now.
Hit the jump to see a shot of the doctor from the front along with the comparison I pasted together.
Jun 16 2008 A Lilypad For The Flood-Induced Apocalypse
The Lilypad Floating Ecopolis for Climate Refugees is a giant floating city that people can live on when the world floods because Al Gore was right. It looks weird but I reserved a spot anyways because I'll be damned if I live in a flooded house. Unless fish promised to swim around my legs while I watch TV, in which I'd consider it. Similar in concept to the Freedom Ship, this mammoth floater would likely cater to the rich. The architectures behind the design believe we'll need these things by 2100 because half of the world will have disappeared underwater. Or maybe just a third will be flooded, I forgot what they said. Maybe just my bathtub. The most unbelievable part about the whole thing? That they had the gall to include marine life in the picture! HA -- like they'll be anything alive in the oceans by 2100. I know, pretty depressing. Seriously though, I have to have sex with a mermaid before they're extinct.
Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures (including one in which they intentionally made a city look like it's burning even though they're just supposed to be the lights from cars and buildings), along with a link to the project page with a bunch more info.
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Apr 29 2008 Imagine This Thing Sucking Your Brains Out
Festo is an industrial automation company that likes making weird shit that creeps me out. This is proof of that. It's a video of their AirJelly, which is a robotic jellyfish that runs on a lithium-ion battery, an electric motor, and a spot of helium. It reminds me of the "floater" (not of the unsinkable turd variety) aliens that Carl Sagan imagines in Cosmos when describing possible life on a Jupiter-like planet. So, yeah. Now imagine this thing attaching itself to your head and sucking your brains out through a hole it cuts with a special drill bit. It won't take your whole brain though, just enough to get a fix. That way it can come and harvest more brain juice whenever it wants. And if you think hiding underwater is the secret to saving your nog, you're wrong. They've already made the robotic bastards for the seas as well. I guess what I'm getting at here is that Festo is an organization run by robot sympathizers from the future that must be stopped. Unless you're cool being some robot's bitch. And trust me, you shouldn't be. I've had sex with a robot before, and I've got three words to say about the experience: cold, metal, could have used more oil.
A video of the underwater version (and no, it's not just a damn jellyfish) after the jump.
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Mar 21 2008 Want An Island? Jack Will Build You One
Want your own artificial island? Then you've come to the right place. Because Jack, that dapper assclown in the picture there, will build you one. That's right, for a paltry $400,000 Jack promises a sweet 110 foot movable island. He has an eBay auction going (with a starting bid of $300,000) and very professional website, but this is the only picture I could find. And it's not even of the island, it's his underwater home schematic!
Be the first to own this beautiful, unique 2500 Sq. Ft. home. The home actually sits 20 feet below the ocean's surface under a man made, movable island. What does the interior look like? That's up to you! You have a 50 ft. by 50 ft. square to do with as you please. I build the box, you dice it up however suits you. All the exterior walls are made of bullet proof glass giving you an unprecedented view of life under the sea.. This home can be yours for just $5,000,000!
Now, if you look at the graphic there it all makes sense. As you can see it has all the necessities, like floating squares. And let us not forget about the island surface! That's a must have. Oh look, buoyancy and square are spelled incorrectly. Wow, sending this guy my life savings is looking more and more like the smartest decision I'll ever made.
eBay Auction
and
Product Website
Thanks to GRRR25, king of tiger people, for the tip
