Oct 2 2009 Frightening: Conceptual Solar Powered BMW
This is a conceptual solar powered BMW. It may look like a fish, but it's not, it's a car, silly! Well, not a real car, cause it's only a concept. Like me. I ONLY EXIST YOUR INTERNET!
Created by 24-yo German designer Anne Forschner, the Lovos stands fo Lifestyle of Voluntary Simplicity. Each of those scales--which are replaceable and turn constantly to align with the sun--is covered with solar cells.
Now I'm no aerodynamicist, but that shit looks like it'll slow you down. AND I CAN'T DRIVE 55, know what I'm saying? It's against my law! The Geekologie law of awesome. Which, honestly, makes gravity look like a little bitch.
Hit the jump for a bunch more shots of the craziness.
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Apr 7 2009 Man Finds Card Number Skimmer Attached To ATM, Removes, Takes Pictures, Internets
A man, Dan we'll call him, because that's his name (or is it? Allegedly it is), visited a Washington Mutual ATM to get some money. Pretty normal story so far, right? Did I mention he was wearing a dinosaur costume? He wasn't -- but you're right, that would have added a sexy twist. Well, when Danald was about to stick his junk in the machine, he noticed something fishy -- the junk receptacle just didn't feel right. So he ripped it off and, HIYO, a card skimmer! For those of you not in on the government conspiracy, skimmers are used to steal your credit card numbers and join adult websites. *ahem* So I've heard. Seriously though, I don't need technology to score women's numbers. Here, watch me work my magic on this chick.
Hey good lookin', what's your name? Oooh, Jenny, I like that. I'm Dick Dragon. I write Geekologie -- maybe you've heard of it? G-E-E-K-O-L-O-G-I-E. It's a website. Just Myspace, huh? Well listen -- you wanna come back to my place later and play strip Risk? No? Well how about you write your number down on this bar napkin anyways. Whoa, you actually did. 867-5309, I'll be calling you later. *wink*
A Man Finds an Actual Card Skimmer in the Wild, in the Flesh [gizmodo]
Mar 19 2009 WTF Was That?: 'Put It On A Hook' A Rap Video Featuring Mario, Link And Mega Man
NOTE: VIDEO IS PROBABLY NSFW DUE TO LANGUAGE
I have no idea what I just watched but it had Mario, Link, and Megaman standing around drinking beer, taking bong hits and fishing. Which makes it the coolest thing I've seen all day not.*
*BBW holding 'I Heart Geekologie Sign' excluded.
Put it on a hook - A rap video (featuring mario, link and megaman) by Inhumans [funnyordie]
Thanks again to Julian, who once caught a great white by dangling his hammerhead in the water. HIYO!
Feb 22 2009 Roll One Up, America: Obama Sushi Rolls
These are apparently sushi rolls made to look like US president Barack Obama. I think I speak for all of us when I say: the president has never tasted so good. Haha, shut up Monica -- your opinion doesn't count! HIYO.
Hit the jump for a couple more pictures including one of a massive Obama sushi display.
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Oct 14 2008 Oops: Possible Mistake On Walmart's Website
This is a screencap from Walmart's Canadian website for Summer's Eve Feminine Spray Ultra - Extra Strength. As you can see, it's applied with a pressure washer. I actually went to the website and the picture was still there, but there wasn't a description of the product. But, FAKE! or not, I think we can all agree that you'd have to be growing psychedelic mushrooms in your vagina to need this shit.
Uh... [baldheretic]
Thanks to Jenny, The Bloggess, who allegedly knows a woman that has to douche with a firehose.
Oct 2 2008 $4,700 Sink Has Built In Aquarium
Let's face it, fish are awesome. And delicious. Well now you can pee in the sink and watch the scrumptious little buggers swim in circles at the same time. This sink makes a perfect compliment to the aquarium shitter, and all for only $4,700. It's like a dream come true, minus the dream, plus $4,700.
Moody Aquarium Sink makes for moody fish [slipperybrick]
Thanks to Silver Sided, who once ate ten dozen fish sticks in a single sitting.
Sep 17 2008 Under The Sea: Fish 'N Flush Toilet Aquarium
The Fish 'N Flush is a 2.5 gallon aquarium that replaces your regular ceramic tank. It consists of two pieces: the actual fill tank, and the aquarium, which surrounds the fill tank for the "fish in your toilet" effect. It costs $300 and is great for pocket fishermen and people who can't keep pet fish alive (comes conveniently located atop a fish cemetery). But for the love of God, DO NOT sell one to this kid, that's just asking for it. I want one though. The only problem is you don't get to enjoy the aquarium while you're sitting on the john. Unless...
UPDATE: You ever tried straddling a toilet? I shat on the floor!
Two more pictures and a video of the flushing in action after the jump.
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Sep 8 2008 Epic Fail: How Not To Clean Your Fishtank
I know what you're thinking, "is that a video still of a fish in some kid's bladder?" And the answer, dear reader, is yes, yes it is.
The patient, who was admitted to hospital with complaints of pain, dribbling urine and acute urinary retention spanning a 24-hour period, gave an interesting explanation.
Details of the case, which was documented in The Internet Journal of Urology, have revealed that the patient claimed that the fish "slipped" into his penis while he was maintaining his aquarium."While he was cleaning the fish tank in his house, he was holding a fish in his hand and went to the toilet for passing urine. When he was passing urine, the fish slipped from his hand and entered his urethra and then he developed all these symptoms.
Riiiight. So the kid was holding a fish in his hand while pissing and it, like the noble salmon, swam up his urine stream and into the pecker. Sounds fishy if you ask me. Just admit it kid, you're a freak. And also, you should be banned from the pet store.
Boy in bizarre 'fish in penis' accident [practicalfishkeeping]
Thanks to Jennifer, who has a friend that had a similar accident with a turtle.
Aug 26 2008 Move Over, Robot: Goblin Shark Is Scarier
Goblin sharks look scary as hell and are scary as hell. Sure they're only a couple feet long, but they're uglier than my sister and have tons of sharp little teeth. Watch the video around 0:20 to see how it's mouth comes out of its face Aliens style to munch on dude's arm. Also, a friend told me that's what a woman's vagina looks like.
Japanese Goblin Shark [collegehumor]
Thanks to Libby, who once punched a goblin shark in the mouth because it looked at her funny.
Jul 24 2008 LEGO Sushi, It's What's (Not) For Dinner
Ever had a really crappy day at work only to come home to a nagging wife and a burnt grilled cheese sandwich? Well multiply that by 1,305 and you'll have an idea what the last five years of my life have been like. Can a man not get some LEGO sushi and a carafe of peace and quiet for once in his God-forsaken life? Apparently not. And that, my friends, is why I'm jumping.
UPDATE: Damnit, I think I rolled my ankle. When it's better I'll try again. And this time I'm stacking a chair on top of the doghouse.
Hit the jump for some delectable closeups.
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